# So... they tell me you like unreadable pap



## Tella (Aug 5, 2017)

Hello, my name is Daniel. Greetings from the Middle East.

So about a year ago, I was posting on another forum, and though my technical and critical posts and opinions on the mechanics of writing and thought were positively accepted, people find my fiction painfully unreadable.

My writing style has changed since and I was practicing on my English (even had a job as an English teacher!) so I was hoping to start a new page with writing (pun intended).

Glad to meet ya'll


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## Pluralized (Aug 5, 2017)

Welcome, Daniel. Your English seems very natural - what's your first language? 

Hope to see you around.

P


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## sas (Aug 5, 2017)

"Ya'll".....I'm still laughing. Please don't teach that...please. Smiles & Welcome.


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## Tella (Aug 5, 2017)

Thank you both!

My mother tongue is Hebrew but I had taught myself English and know it better than I ever would Hebrew.

Come here Ya'll, I'm gonna kill you. *gunshot* Ya'll is dead now.


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## H.Brown (Aug 8, 2017)

Hello Daniel and welcome to WF,

Painfully unreadable??? I am sure we can help once you have made the required ten post (anti spam measure) post us some of your writing and see what feedback you get? These ten post are any post made in a forum that is not the living areas. So post some critiques, welcome other new members or even jump into the writing discussions and you will make ten posts with no problems.

What genre do you write in?

Hope to see you around and if you have any questions please ask away.


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## JustRob (Aug 9, 2017)

Hebrew? That's the language where you can leave all the vowels out, isn't it? Don't try that here or your work may well be unreadable, although we'll struggle through anything that looks vaguely like English if the story is good enough. For example, I enjoyed _Feersum Endjinn_, a published novel by the very successful science fiction author Iain M Banks, although some readers couldn't cope with it because of the very strange way that it was written ... on purpose.

I'm the mentor for the beta reading forums, where we tackle full length works. What ultimately matters is whether you have a good story really worth reading. Even major problems with the English can be sorted out eventually but if the story isn't worth it then it would be a big waste of time to bother, except for the practice. Therefore a boring story, even if written in perfect English, won't impress us much. So, think up a really good tale before starting the hard part of putting it into words ... complete with vowels preferably.

We look forward to seeing your efforts.


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## Tella (Aug 9, 2017)

H.Brown said:


> Hello Daniel and welcome to WF,
> 
> Painfully unreadable??? I am sure we can help once you have made the required ten post (anti spam measure) post us some of your writing and see what feedback you get? These ten post are any post made in a forum that is not the living areas. So post some critiques, welcome other new members or even jump into the writing discussions and you will make ten posts with no problems.
> 
> ...



Thank you for the hearty welcome! Actually, I've already been through the ten post requirement and posted the opening scene of my WIP novel.

I don't have a particular genre. It's ideas for stories that I do have, short, novella-length and novel-length. My current WIP is set in our world. The closest term I've found for this genre is literary fiction, but I guess most people will call it YA. I do stay away from romance, though (got some distaste for love-centered stories).



			
				H.Brown;2099684

[COLOR=#333333 said:
			
		

> Hebrew? That's the language where you can leave all the vowels out, isn't it? Don't try that here or your work may well be unreadable, although we'll struggle through anything that looks vaguely like English if the story is good enough. For example, I enjoyed [/COLOR]_Feersum Endjinn, a published novel by the very successful science fiction author Iain M Banks, although some readers couldn't cope with it because of the very strange way that it was written ... on purpose.
> 
> I'm the mentor for the beta reading forums, where we tackle full length works. What ultimately matters is whether you have a good story really worth reading. Even major problems with the English can be sorted out eventually but if the story isn't worth it then it would be a big waste of time to bother, except for the practice. Therefore a boring story, even if written in perfect English, won't impress us much. So, think up a really good tale before starting the hard part of putting it into words ... complete with vowels preferably.
> 
> _We look forward to seeing your efforts.



Ohoho trust me, I've got me some good idea for a story, it's writing all of it that's the tough part.

No worries about the Hebrew. The unreadable quality of my writing did not stem from my Hebrew. It has nothing to do with Hebrew. I simply tried a literary style which failed to work. Having had posted the aforementioned WIP scene and getting some nice feedback, none of which address unreadable clauses, I reckon it's safe to say that the age of unreadability is far behind me and now I must focus on writing technique instead.

I've been hitting the books on storytelling, including series like Write Great Fiction and Elements of Writing Fiction, as well as independent manuals of Donal Maas, etc... The thing is, I've got the theory all in my head. I understand how everything _should_ work, characters, plot, etc... but practice is tougher than theory. That is not to say that I am a master of the art hence I need no further reading or anything like that.


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## H.Brown (Aug 9, 2017)

Hi Daniel could you provide a link so that I can check it out either in here or via PM?


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## Kevin (Aug 9, 2017)

Tella said:


> Thank you both!
> 
> My mother tongue is Hebrew but I had taught myself English and know it better than I ever would Hebrew.
> 
> Come here Ya'll, I'm gonna kill you. *gunshot* Ya'll is dead now.


Do you have the accent down?


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## Tella (Aug 9, 2017)

Kevin said:


> Do you have the accent down?



Faugh! I spit upon the Israeli accent. Made sure to practice my American/British accents. The truth is, my English use of grammar and extensive vocabulary is highly superior to my Hebrew. In a way, I have migrated from one language to another doing some sick practice over the years. Folk might even mistake me for an American. Even the Americans!


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## Kevin (Aug 10, 2017)

Tella said:


> Faugh! I spit upon the Israeli accent. Made sure to practice my American/British accents. The truth is, my English use of grammar and extensive vocabulary is highly superior to my Hebrew. In a way, I have migrated from one language to another doing some sick practice over the years. Folk might even mistake me for an American. Even the Americans!


oh no... I meant do you do accents, you know, 'imitate' well ( for a better word)? It sounds like you do. Israeli accent... You might dismiss your own country but to others it has its own qualities, sounding different. I do accents accidentally...had a customer ask me if I was from Denmark ( ..no, I'm from here) because I started talking like her. I couldn't help it , sort of embarrassing -heh- . Persian, call me on the phone? I'm gonna start talking with a Persian accent, back.  Anyway, I was just curious. Sounds like you have the 'gift'. 

I think talking is not book-learning, and speaking doesn't exactly translate to writing. I really think writing is just a translation, an inexact one, even though they're 'in' the same language, different structures and layouts. It's what I'm here practicing- the translating part, spoken to written.


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