# Monday Morning



## JosephB (Jun 12, 2011)

A bird’s eye view
 your back tattoo
 soft, cello-curves
 expanding

look back
 slit-eyed
 smile, slyly
 utter, obscenely
 in half-sleep haze

 enveloped
 in velum light
 exhausted
 lying, entwined
 delay
 the impending
 fervor 
of routine

belly-down
 splayed
 white-on-white
 I leave you, warm
 full
 dreaming


----------



## Gumby (Jun 12, 2011)

You really have a talent for capturing a moment, Joe. Excellent and I much enjoyed, though I almost feel like I've been a peeping tom here.


----------



## wood (Jun 12, 2011)

this is a very soft and longing moment, very elegant, and i can relate to that experience (such a perfect feeling... why disturb it)  very well done.

zig


----------



## Squalid Glass (Jun 12, 2011)

This made me think of Stevens' "Sunday Morning" not just because of the title, but the focus on the moment and the mention of birds right of the bat. 

Your use of line is great as is your vocabulary. I very much enjoyed this moment poem.


----------



## JosephB (Jun 13, 2011)

Gumby -- thanks for reading. Most of my poems are inspired by moments -- I get a feeling from them and try to capture it without thinking too much.

wood -- Glad you appreciated it. Thanks for reading and commenting.

S.G. -- Thanks. Not always sure about how to break things. I write pretty fast, but usually spend the most time with that aspect of it. A lot of rearranging and revisiting. Glad it worked for you.

Cheers, all.


----------



## Chesters Daughter (Jun 16, 2011)

Where have you been, Joseph? Naughty soul neglecting us so. tsk, tsk. Your ability to capture what should be just ordinary moments in the so called American Dream and beautify them so substantially never ceases to amaze me. And that you do it without a bunch of frills shows the extent of your talent. Your pieces are like snapshots to me, cherished memories captured for all time. This piece is no exception. I adore S3 for it's sentiment, lovely wording and perfect enjambment. Another winner, Joe, the depth of your love for your wife is a pleasure to be privy to, although like Cin, sometimes, I feel the voyeur. lol. Well done, love.

Best,
Lisa


----------



## JosephB (Jun 17, 2011)

Lisa, I've just been keeping busy with work, family, kids activities etc. -- writing always seems to take a back seat. I'm glad this worked for you. Very often, my relationship with my wife is the only thing that inspires me to write poetry at all -- but I'm trying to branch out from that some and try some new things. Thanks so much for reading and the positive comments. I hope to post and participate more here, even if it's just for the summer as things have slowed down a bit. 

Cheers


----------



## Jinxi (Jun 17, 2011)

This is such a lovely poem Joseph. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. I can relate completely to the feelings you have captured - a special, warm, loving moment in time. It is clear to see the love and appreciation you have for your wife, and it is an honour to share that with you through your words. Thank you.


----------



## MadBen (Jun 17, 2011)

Nice one 

It puts me in mind of two people in a modern style appartement with a clean and bright layout as well as lots of metal and glass. I somehow imagine a woman descending a spiral staircase to the lower half, while looking towards the bright window that faces east in the bright morning light with her small bag held over her right shoulder, smiling with a mixture of joy and mischief. Oh.. and I think there is some cellophane-like paper from an unpacked present on the table... I think it contained a bottle of wine 

I'm sure you had your very own different image in mind, but it surely painted a very detailed one for me =D>


----------



## JosephB (Jun 18, 2011)

Jinxi -- thanks so much for reading and the nice comments. What makes you think it's about my wife? (Heh.)

MedBen -- A _slightly_ different image. A messy bedroom, laundry by the door, kids lurking in the hall etc. Glad it worked for you.


----------



## Firemajic (Jun 18, 2011)

Stunningly Beautiful in it's simplicity , Peace-Jul


----------



## Jinxi (Jun 18, 2011)

JosephB said:


> Jinxi -- thanks so much for reading and the nice comments. What makes you think it's about my wife? (Heh.)



Um, it was an assumption?


----------



## JosephB (Jun 18, 2011)

It's about her. I'd be in mighty big trouble otherwise.


----------



## Nick (Jun 18, 2011)

This poem is so sensual, but it's subtlety makes it so. I think the only downfall is that you've described it so well, you have dozens of members imagining your wife's body. I think you made a wise choice with the lack of extensive punctuation, and the lower-case setting - like the simplicity of the love you clearly feel, and the complete relaxation of yourself when describing her (and after the deed). Definitely a Monday Morning piece. I feel very mellow, which means I think you've achieved your goal (or one of them). A beautiful poem, Joseph.


----------



## Jinxi (Jun 18, 2011)

JosephB said:


> It's about her. I'd be in mighty big trouble otherwise.



Lol. It's really beautiful.


----------



## JosephB (Jun 18, 2011)

Thanks Nick. I wish I could say that was a choice, but I use that style for all my poetry. Sometimes I wonder if it’s just easier for me that way – if it isn’t a little lazy. Glad it worked for you. Thanks for reading and commenting.


----------

