# Trembling Teddy Bear



## Firemajic (Apr 1, 2015)

_You can ask but she won't tell
how she survives her personal hell
tearing pain traumatic fright
her freezing fear of the night

His shadow slips in through the door
she closes her eyes tries to ignore
the horror of his bruising touch
trembling bear tightly clutched

During the day she acts ok
but she rarely ever plays
the games the innocent ones enjoy
she is someone's night time toy

The children say she's not cool
for bringing her stuffed bear to school
but she really does not care
they have secrets that they share

She won't look you in the eye
and she never ever cries
she feels safe when she's alone
child defiled face of stone

HE is home it's time to eat
she walks to the table stumbling feet
he gives her his secret grin
sick desire incestuous sin

Mommy helps her get ready for bed
while she screams inside her head
pleasemommyplease pleasesaveme
unanswered prayer silent plea

Mommy kisses her goodnight
hugs her trembling daughter tight
whispers baby have sweet dreams
you are such a precious thing

 She cowers in her small pink bed
choking fear sick with dread
silently he opens her bedroom door
dark shadow moves across the floor

 She looks into your sad glass eyes
 she can hear your silent cries
silently she screams teddy please
why can't anyone hear me

Trembling weeping teddy bear
this night time horror that they share
 she will dry your stitched on tears
hold you tight calm your fears

There is no one to save her tonight
she hugs her teddy bear real tight
he's like her a helpless thing
and neither one of them can scream 



_


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## Darkkin (Apr 1, 2015)

This is a stark, grimfaced piece.  Rhyme scheme is solid, the only major note I have is perspective.  You flip from third to first halfway through and it tossed me.  I would suggest keeping it one or the other, never mixed.  You want the perspective from both sides, inside the home and out, make that bear your narrator.  It is there, witness to everything.  It is a keeper of secrets, bleak as they are.

- Darkkin.


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## aj47 (Apr 1, 2015)

I have to agree with Darkkin--the POV shift doesn't work.

I think in choosing a POV, you need to decide between the dispassionate feel of third person or the immediacy of first.  Each express horror but in different ways.


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## Carousel (Apr 1, 2015)

As a father of four girls nothing sickens me more than the crime, and it is a crime, of incest. There has been a mass of revelations in the UK recently which prompted a female pundit to say ‘Why can’t men control themselves’ well sorry, it isn't and never was any question of self control, for the vast majority of men self control never comes into the equation. God knows the damage they do young children but also to their own sex to, because they plant the seed of doubt. ‘Is it safe to leave Susie alone with her daddy”? And we have to live with that.

Sorry. I never finished your poem; it churned my stomach before I got halfway through. 

Cari


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## TJ1985 (Apr 1, 2015)

Julia, excellent piece, with tons of emotion and power. 

My only suggestion would be about this stanza, 

_HE is home it's time to eat
she walks to the table stumbling feet
he gives her his secret grin
sick desire incestuous sin

_The second line is a little awkward for me. But, it's a pinhole in a battleship. I really enjoyed it, and I thank you for sharing it with us.


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## Firemajic (Apr 1, 2015)

DarKKin and annie... Thank you both... You are right, I had a reason for switching the POV... But I was afraid it would not work... I so appreciate your help with this... not easy to write..at all...

Cari.. I am sorry this disturbed you.. I apologize... I realize this is not easy to read...Thank you for your comments... Peace...jul


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## Nellie (Apr 1, 2015)

Carousel said:


> Sorry. I never finished your poem; it churned my stomach before I got halfway through.
> 
> Cari



I eventually finished the poem with much trepidation. It speaks volumes whether it is written in 1st or 3rd person. We all get the picture, Julia.
Thanks for having the guts to speak up once again.


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## Firemajic (Apr 2, 2015)

Tj and Nellie.. Thank you for reading and commenting.. I appreciate your feedback.. Peace always...jul


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## Carousel (Apr 2, 2015)

Absolutely no need to apologise Julia, as the man said if you’re writing poetry then write the truth and unfortunately it’s a truth for far too many children today. What is equally gut wrenching is the fact the truth has been often hidden and covered up for by the rich and the powerful in the UK. If they knew and hid what was going on for years, then in my opinion, they should also face the full force of the law.
Sorry, this subject disgusts me.

Cari.


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## Firemajic (Apr 2, 2015)

I understand...


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## escorial (Apr 20, 2015)

the title kind of prepares me for what is about to be read....not an easy read and getting to the end was not easy.....to have wrote this must have took so much out of you...a hard hitting piece


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## Firemajic (Apr 20, 2015)

I know this was a tough read Escorial...  I appreciate that you walked with me through my memories... and that you heard me...and that you knew how very brutal this was to write... Thank you. Peace cool Dude... jul


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## TKent (Apr 20, 2015)

Hey Jules,

As always, I never read one of your poems without feeling something deeply. This time it's pain   Well done.


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## Mistique (Apr 20, 2015)

I have no words, but I wanted you to know I read it and it left me speechless. Thank you for writing it.


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## Nicholas McConnaughay (Apr 21, 2015)

I liked it. I don't usually comment on a lot of *poetry *on this forum because I've only thus far dabbled in the subject myself, but I have to say, I was really impressed with your work. I liked the wordplay and I liked the subject-matter. It's dark, of course, but that's the way of the beast for a lot of my favorite poems. This one is no different. It'll make someone dearly uncomfortable, but hopefully they'll still be able to admire the dark-humor and wit. I did. Bravo!


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## Firemajic (Apr 21, 2015)

Tkent ... I appreciate that you read my poem, and that you understood the pain.. Thank you..

Misty.. It means so much to me that you took the time to read this, and that you cared enough to comment.. Thank you for your kindness..

Nick..   I am a fan of your dark poems, so I really appreciate your comments... Thank you... Peace always... jul


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## Mistique (Apr 21, 2015)

Firemajic said:


> Misty.. It means so much to me that you took the time to read this, and that you cared enough to comment.. Thank you for your kindness.



I don't always have the energy to read as much as I like to, but yours definately stands out


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## Firemajic (Apr 21, 2015)

:angel:  Thank you Misty... peace..


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