# Women can be so cruel



## LeeC (Aug 21, 2015)

Many years back I worked in the midwest for five or six years, where one evening in Mason City, Iowa I attended a get together of couples. The hostess had apparently earlier in the day done some harvesting from her garden as there were various vegetables lying on the kitchen counter. 

When I entered the kitchen to grab a beer, a wife was holding a summer squash and telling her husband, "Don't you wish this were you?" Noticing I'd overheard, the poor husband turned as red as the beets also lying there.


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## Lewdog (Aug 21, 2015)

If I had a gourd I would go to the hospital immediately.  8-[


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## TheWonderingNovice (Aug 21, 2015)

My family is wildly inappropriate so jokes like these were made quite often growing up. I just became de-sensitised to that kind of stuff, sadly :disturbed: 

Poor guy, you probably walked in on some private joke, unless she meant that in a cruel way.


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## LeeC (Aug 22, 2015)

TheWonderingNovice said:


> Poor guy, you probably walked in on some private joke, unless she meant that in a cruel way.


That wife was a bit more "prankish" than most, maybe in an attention getting way. Later in the evening she told a story about their first date. Supposedly she had let him drive her to a no-tell motel, then laughed refusing to go in. I don't remember her exact words. He was just a good natured clod that worked at the local cement kiln where I helped set up an IBM 1800. 

Strange the match-ups in life.


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## PiP (Aug 22, 2015)

Women can be cruel especially to each other. I'm dealing with some rather toxic bitches who are making a dear friends life a misery. The problem is she does not have the balls to stand up to them. They now know better than to cross me for being her friend. She's lonely and depressed but she won't let me poke their eyes out for being so 'petty and unnecessarily spiteful'. When they are being 'nice' they encourage her to drink knowing she has a drink problem. Ho hum. 

It saddens me groups prey on the weak like vulchers. Circling above and each spiteful peck more vicious than the last. I see them pecking away at her confidence and she disappears into this black pit of depression.

... my hairdresser wrecked my hair. It looks a mess and my husband knows I know it looks a mess. But do you know what...? He never misses an opportunity to put me down in front of our friends or when we meet new people: "Your hair looks a mess - what on earth have you done to it?" One day I'm going to dye my hair purple and have it cut punk style. I'll pass on the piercings and tattoos because they'll probably hurt...


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## Kevin (Aug 22, 2015)

Ah! I know a hairdresser(ssh, she's asleep upstairs). Expert at color repair.  How far is it from Algarvy to Calabasas?


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## LeeC (Aug 22, 2015)

PiP said:


> He never misses an opportunity to put me down in front of our friends or when we meet new people: "Your hair looks a mess - what on earth have you done to it?" One day I'm going to dye my hair purple and have it cut punk style. I'll pass on the piercings and tattoos because they'll probably hurt...


Whoa, something I'd never get away with. The wife's a half inch shorter than five feet, and makes up for it in forceful personality. Many years ago, in my youthful ignorance and somewhat inebriated, at a local get together I said, "In every man's life he should have at least one good woman and one good dog. I've had three good dogs."

She simply replied, "It's easy to see why." 

At another gathering where I took a seat on the periphery not interacting, and I guess not paying enough attention to her, she drove home leaving me to walk. When I asked why she said, "Oh, you were there?"

Finding the in-between in life can be difficult ;-)


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## PiP (Aug 22, 2015)

your lady has style, Lee. love it!


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## midnightpoet (Aug 22, 2015)

LeeC said:


> Whoa, something I'd never get away with. The wife's a half inch shorter than five feet, and makes up for it in forceful personality. Many years ago, in my youthful ignorance and somewhat inebriated, at a local get together I said, "In every man's life he should have at least one good woman and one good dog. I've had three good dogs."
> 
> She simply replied, "It's easy to see why."
> 
> ...



 My wife's moniker is "spitfire" and it's for a good reason.  Her heritage is Cajun, and sarcasm comes easy for her.  Some wives call their husbands "honey," mine is "asshole."  Somehow we have managed to make it 36 years, not sure how.  
  :grin:


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## escorial (Aug 22, 2015)

most people can control their less empathetic side but often it simmers underneath all the time and the chance to release itself is often i think met with...glee


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## Boofy (Aug 22, 2015)

Blah. Some women can be really catty, almost to the point where it looks territorial. I've been on the receiving end of petty verbal abuse more than a few times just because a girl didn't like that I'd joined her friend group. I don't know what you can do for those people, really. Keep being nice in the hope that they'll see you aren't playing the game? That's what I do. For the most part it isn't very rewarding, though. How exactly do you opt out of that sort of standoffish relationship with somebody without isolating yourself from the group entirely? Girl politics.


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## LeeC (Aug 22, 2015)

Or, maybe the other way around, the empathetic aspect of the human condition varies by individual temperament. That in ranging from not caring to caring too much, sometimes out of necessity in dealing with one's own issues. 

Did I just say the same thing as you es :scratch: Time for a nap.


Oh, and Boofy, I'd have said "Some people can be really catty, almost to the point where it looks territorial." Though depending on the person it might range from being described as catty to intimidating. 

What I find interesting is the range from the girls' table/jock table stereotype of high school to the subtle sophistication (depending on maturity achieved) in later life ;-) 

Damn I miss the simplicity of the one room school house I attended.


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## shadowwalker (Aug 22, 2015)

I have to admit, I have a real problem with people who won't stand up for themselves. What are they going to do - spend their whole lives depending on others to do it for them? Or just living miserably because they refuse to open their mouths? Not to mention the idea of their having my back if the need arises is pretty well shot.

So maybe I'm cruel. Spent too many years as a kid defending these types and finding out the hard way it's best to walk away (guess where they went when the bullies got retribution).


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## Kevin (Aug 22, 2015)

I think men are easier: "Uhg!" *thump* with a club. No more uhg.


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## escorial (Aug 22, 2015)

nap away LeeC....we all end up the way we started...


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## Boofy (Aug 22, 2015)

Kevin said:


> I think men are easier: "Uhg!" *thump* with a club. No more uhg.



Amen to that, Kev ^^


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## Anari (Aug 23, 2015)

Personally, I have never had much time for people in general. Even less for women. I find most women to be far too catty for my liking. I am so glad that I am different enough to not be anything like them. You can go ahead and think I'm some kind of a nut, but I much prefer the company of dogs.


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## Crowley K. Jarvis (Aug 23, 2015)

I suppose you could saw I was at least in the 'upper-middle-class?' If not upper class? I don't know. I was spoiled. I had everything. My only female friends were also spoiled and had everything. 

I remember a certain trip I went on...

Backstory: I may be thin, but I parkour, run, exercise, and yes, I do lift, bro.  And there's plenty of famous sports players that are on the lanky side, right? Heh. 

I told her, given my energy level and metabolism, I have a pretty athletic build. 

'More like a stickman.' She said.

My first thought was 'Excuse me, *%&$#?' 

We were at six flags, everyone was having fun. I also heard similar comments from her friends, aimed at pretty much everyone,  that were also needlessly poisonous. 

It was completely uncalled for, and it seems everyone I met in each family/social circle had exactly the same mean streak. 

Like a pack of wild animals that tear apart anything living, including eachother. It's sad.

I do prefer a good clubbing. Or a spearing. Aahg, let me get my spear, and my finest furs! It's time to go mammoth hunting, uuhga buhgga.


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## shadowwalker (Aug 23, 2015)

Frankly, I don't see much difference in the level of nastiness of women versus men. Men used to be more physical than verbal about it, but that's changing. Both will be nice to your face and backstab you later, both gossip like fiends, and, as men become more verbally adept, both can cut a person to ribbons in a minute.


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## dither (Aug 23, 2015)

Quite so shadowwalker, it's a poor poor world.


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## escorial (Aug 23, 2015)

dither said:


> Quite so shadowwalker, it's a poor poor world.



i can smell the perfume from your handbag here dither


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## dither (Aug 23, 2015)

They're just making their way Escorial and they take no prisoners.


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## LeeC (Aug 23, 2015)

Crowley K. Jarvis said:


> I do prefer a good clubbing. Or a spearing. Aahg, let me get my spear, and my finest furs! It's time to go mammoth hunting, uuhga buhgga.


You do realize you're opening the door for some more of my natural sciences observations. Like the other day I was talking to some porcupines and saw little behavioral differences between males and females. Their morphology enables that nobody messes with mama porcupine when she's not in the mood.


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## dale (Aug 23, 2015)

shadowwalker said:


> Frankly, I don't see much difference in the level of nastiness of women versus men. Men used to be more physical than verbal about it, but that's changing. Both will be nice to your face and backstab you later, both gossip like fiends, and, as men become more verbally adept, both can cut a person to ribbons in a minute.


men become cruel BECAUSE of women. women basically teach us there's no way around it. we have to be cruel. lol


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## Kevin (Aug 23, 2015)

Yes, it wasn't Ghenghis, it was Ghengha... his old lady, you see she wanted some Chinese silk, and...


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## Mike C (Aug 26, 2015)

People can be cruel. I don't think there's a gender divide.


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## The Green Shield (Aug 26, 2015)

The title is misleading. Cruelty doesn't know gender, race, nationality, or any of that arbitrary stuff. Anyone and everyone can be capable of cruelty*.*


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## LeeC (Aug 26, 2015)

Whoa, lighten up folks, that's not the idea of the thread 


"_Life is far too important a thing ever to talk seriously about._"  ~  Oscar Wilde


and that is because


"_Life is judged with all the blindness of life itself._"  ~  George Santayana


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## Ariel (Aug 26, 2015)

dale said:


> men become cruel BECAUSE of women. women basically teach us there's no way around it. we have to be cruel. lol



I think it's a two-way street, Dale.  We teach each other cruelty through being negligent and thoughtless.


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## Deleted member 56686 (Aug 26, 2015)

Yes, if I read the OP right, it was something of a light-hearted anecdote and not actually a question as to if women are actually cruel. So, try to keep it light maybe?


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## bookmasta (Aug 26, 2015)

Women, men, people regardless of gender can be cruel. That's life, though. As Rumi said, start a fire in your life and find people to fan the flames. While that won't work for every situation, you'll always have the ability to choose how to react to what comes your way.


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