# When Bad Reviews Just Won't Leave Your Head



## sunaynaprasad (Jan 19, 2015)

Today I got 2 2-star reviews on my book. That bothered me a lot. I've only gotten 5 2-star reviews, which may seem like nothing compared to traditionally published authors. But my problem is that they just don't leave my head. The first 2-star review I got was several months ago, and it still sticks with me now. In fact, the few negative reviews I got overpower to many positive ones I received.
Now my problem is that I'm overly sensitive for my age, 21. For example, if anyone yells or gets mad at me, I still cry for a long period of time. I never cried over a bad review and I know not to respond to them. But here's what I think when I do get one.

_Everyone who gives me a bad review needs to be punished.

I wish I could respond or hurt them back.

I don't want to have anything to do with them ever again.

_I know that everyone gets bad reviews, even the best authors. I understand that it's impossible to please everyone. Believe it or not, I don't like being this sensitive. I want to toughen myself up and focus more on the good reviews. But often times the bad reviews are not ignorant, but constructive. They make me insecure about my writing. I don't ever want to be in that position to take my book off the market and do it over again (I almost did this past summer, but changed my mind the next day). I also want my book to look like it's worth buying and reading. But I need to get the bad reviews out of my head. It's getting ridiculous.


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## dale (Jan 19, 2015)

i know none of us like bad reviews, but you should try not to take them too hard for a number of reasons.
1. you can use them to maybe evaluate your own work and if they just aren't being jerks, maybe learn from
them for your next project.
2. i have to say...if i see a book and read the reviews and don't see any negative ones at all? i immediately wonder
if all the reviews just aren't props written by the authors friends, family, and so forth. to me? a couple bad reviews
actually gives the book more credibility than just all 5 star praises.


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## Bruno Spatola (Jan 19, 2015)

Hi there. 

I've read a few pages of your work, and -- if I may be so bold -- it's not perfect. Perhaps you should work at being more accepting of criticism, especially when there's so much room to grow as an artist. Few reach their prime at twenty-one, after all. 

Taking bad reviews to heart can be a good thing, so long as you don't dwell on them. For me, they're as valid a writing tool as pencil and paper; they highlight the structural cracks that your personal attachment can blind you from. It's so hard to be objective about your own creations' positives and negatives, and outside feedback is crucial to counterbalance that. People telling you you're wonderful is nice, but utterly useless by itself. If anything, I'd recommend that you focus _more_ on the people saying your writing needs work, not less. 

It's up to you, in the end. If you're completely content with your work and writing ability, then ignore bad reviews; if you consider writing fiction a constant pilgrimage, then you should read every constructive comment with deep interest, and find ways of applying it to your craft. You still have the right to agree or disagree with it, but don't ignore it.

Hope this helps. Good luck.

Edit: this thread may help - http://www.writingforums.com/threads/153682-Got-Criticism-Always-Consider-the-Source


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## tabasco5 (Jan 19, 2015)

I'm 31 now, and I praise the Lord I didn't publish anything when I was 21.  Even having said that, when I look back at some things I wrote even a year ago I can get embarrassed.  But, that is one way I know that I am growing as an author.

This is all to say, that yes, you will get negative reviews and they will hurt you worse than sticks and stones.  But, you are still and always will grow as a person and an author.  Let the words hurt you, let them get in your head, then use those words as motivation for improving your writing.  Do what it takes to learn to get better and do it.


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## sunaynaprasad (Jan 19, 2015)

The thing is, though, that because of those ratings, I didn't feel like writing today.


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## tabasco5 (Jan 19, 2015)

sunaynaprasad said:


> The thing is, though, that because of those ratings, I didn't feel like writing today.



An egg, a carrot, and a handful of coffee beans were placed in separate pots of boiling water.  After a few minutes the pots were removed from the heat and the contents removed.  The egg, which was fluid inside beforehand, became hardened by the water and solidified.  The carrot, which was solid and beautiful in color, was softened by the water and became mushy and discolored.  The coffee beans, though, they retained their shape and consistency and worked to change the water instead.

Each of these three items were subjected to the same process for the same amount of time.  The egg let the water make it hard, the carrot let the water make it soft, but the coffee changed its world for the better.


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## Morkonan (Jan 19, 2015)

sunaynaprasad said:


> The thing is, though, that because of those ratings, I didn't feel like writing today.



Turn that into something else...

Not everyone is going to love everything you do. And, they are often not going to worry about how much of yourself that you may have personally invested in what you've done. I can't know, for instance, that you were really proud of taking your trashcan out to the curb this morning. All I know is that I was awakened at 5am by some inconsiderate neighbor lugging their noisy trashcan out to the street... 

What you produce is yours. It's your work. What people read is your work. If they don't like it, there are several reasons possible for that and not all of them have to do with the quality of the work you produced. They could have just been in a bad mood. They could of not liked the story because they don't like the genre. Your story might have given rise to an unpleasant memory or they might just be a jerk, in general. It's also possible that everyone who liked your story is a moron and they ones who didn't like it are the only credible readers around. 

What does that tell you? 

It should tell you that the only thing that you can do is try to write your story as _well as you can_. Sure, pay attention to criticism, but learn what sort of criticism is valid. Not everyone's opinion is worth listening to, no matter what they have to say about your story.

Good feedback is important. "Stars" are not good feedback. If "Stars" were considered good feedback, Justin Beiber would be the greatest individual of the modern age. What's important to you, as a writer, where feedback is concerned, is whether or not it is credible, provides good information, appears to understand basic story mechanics, and is presented to you in a clear and concise manner. If you get that kind of feedback, pay attention to it. Even then, it may not always be accurate - Humans are prone to error. It's going to be up to you to judge whether or not a particular piece of feedback is worth the ink used to create it. Learning how to do that is one of the things that comes with your growth as a writer. Every piece of feedback that you receive should not be judged equally credible - Learn to judge the quality of the feedback you receive.

Turn your despair or anger into something else that is productive towards improving your writing. If someone didn't like your work, OK, fine, try to improve. Write more. Write better. Hone your grammar and punctuation skills. Work towards developing good plots and characters. Improve your dialogue. Work towards becoming a better writer, so you can become a better judge of worthy critiques. 

Your objective is to get everyone to want to read what you write. But, you will never accomplish that task. (Some people don't like Shakespeare, go figure..) But, it's the striving to accomplish that task that's most important. They don't have to_ like _everything that you write, but you want to work towards making them to want to read it, anyway.


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## sunaynaprasad (Jan 20, 2015)

Thanks for the advice, guys.


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## DB17 (Jan 24, 2015)

Sunayna...I got a terrible review in a major music magazine when my book was published from a well-respected music journalist, and it hurt. It hurt worse, because he waited over a year to do the review after the book was published. To this day, I would like to tell this guy off if we ever met face to face. On the other hand, I got several great reviews and a lot of letters from people who bought the book and loved it. Now, my book is considered a cult classic, and original copies sell for big bucks. Truth is, the book could have been better, and if the day comes when I revise it for a third time, it will be rewritten from the ground up.

In a way, it was a case of "turnabout is fair play." I reviewed concerts, albums and CDs for years, and never had any hesitation about saying something sucked. I actually got phone calls and threats of bodily harm from a couple of musicians whose work I had panned. Ray Manzarek of The Doors threatened to have me offed because I slammed a band of his when they played at the Bottom Line in NYC. He called the paper I wrote for and demanded my address and phone number! Of course, nothing happened. I got to see the other side of the coin when someone flamed my work.

When you put your work out there for the world to see, you're bound to get criticism from someone. Not everyone will like your work. You cannot please everybody. If you are happy with what you've written and you've done your best, that's all you can do. But, you are young, and I'll bet you have a ways to go until your writing matures. That's no crime! I look back at some of the work I've done over the years and realize it could have been better. You grow, you learn, and you get better. Just keep at it.

Remember, bad reviews are not personal attacks on you or your character. Treat them as learning expriences.


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## GenkiWorld (Jan 24, 2015)

As with everything in life, you can’t have well without the bad. Getting bad reviews is normal and something we as writers should always be expecting. The trick is to look at those bad reviews in a constructive way and not let them cripple us. If we let bad reviews get under our skin then our self-confidence will start to waver and son enough we will be unsure of the quality of our work.


Whenever I look for a book to read, I make sure to go through the reviews to see what other readers have thought of the book over ll. When I don’t find a single bad review that races up red warning flags for me. There is no such thing as perfection, so if a book doesn’t have at least one bad review, suspicion takes root and I quickly lose interest in that book.



Take your reviews as constructive criticism. As writers we always have room for improvement and areas to polish to make them chine, for our work is like gem and only through practice and polishing those skills will we make it truly chine. Build up on those negative reviews, strengthen those problem areas they mentioned and the next time you will see they are going to give you a five star review.


The fact your book has only two negative reviews speak highly of the quality of your writing and your book over all. Stand up high and be proud of yourself and the good work you have done.


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## Riis Marshall (Jan 27, 2015)

Hello Sunay

Some time ago I put up the first page of one of my projects for peer review on another forum and it was criticized for 'bad grammar'. As far as I could tell, my grammar was just fine. As a test, I put up a page from the Prologue of a Nelson DeMille novel, claiming it was my own work. It was criticized for 'bad grammar'.

Since that day, I haven't take criticism or bad reviews too seriously.

Having said that, if a reviewer tells me, in a constructive and not-too-hysterical way my Prologue and back story seem a bit muddled and maybe with a bit of a re-write I could make it much easier for my readers to make sense of it, I accept this as positive and look again at my work.

If they tell me they think my hero is too old because heroes in thrillers aren't supposed to have grandchildren or that my hero's sidekick has a mean streak, I simply ignore them.

One of the things I like to do is pick up some books by established writers in my genre, pick out some sections that relate to what I'm trying to do and see how they have done it. This isn't to suggest I want to copy their work, I just want to see how they have solved a problem similar to the one I'm facing.

Another way to address this problem, as has been stated here many times by many writers is to write, write, write then read, read, read then repeat. Just as with music and painting, all writing is practise for the writing that follows. In my experience, if you write three books, the third is likely to be much stronger than the first. (My problem, of course, is, perfectionist that I am, I then want to go back and re-write the first and the second books.)

All the best with your writing.

Warmest regards
Riis


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## TIG (Jan 28, 2015)

I'm going to make a constructive comment about the way you are feeling, but I want to say that I think it might upset you, so it's up to you whether you bother reading this.

To me, there is something very telling in your opening post. You state that the thoughts you have from a bad review are: _Everyone who gives me a bad review needs to be punished; I wish I could respond or hurt them back; I don't want to have anything to do with them ever again.
_
This seems to indicate that you don't believe that the reader has any right to an opinion about a work they have purchased. If they do then they're merely voicing it out of spite, a spite you'd like to use in revenge. It's not a healthy attitude for anything in life, and certainly not for a creative process. You've immediately dismissed the idea that maybe, just maybe, your work needs improving. Instead the reader is in the wrong.

Many years ago I learned something that is very valuable. If anyone tells me they like something I've written, I thank them and move along. However, if they tell me they don't like it, hate it even, then I'll take my time to listen to them. I won't try and defend what I've written, or why I've written it. I listen, absorb and try to understand their point of view. Not only that, but sometimes I'll try to keep in touch with them, because I value their feedback over any amount of 'well dones'.


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