# iAriadne



## aj47 (Aug 26, 2011)

[FONT=FreeSerif, serif]I weave my web with fingers quick and deft,
Meticulously crafting my design.
With tags for warp and data as my weft,
I work where words and images align.

My clipboard bobbins text and URLs,
Creating elements behind the scenes;
New menus, paragraphs, and table cells
Which all display the same on different screens.

Through fabrications styled upon cascade,
With vim, I tell your browser what to do;
Determine what ideas are conveyed
On your computer and your mobile, too.

Your feedback on this document is key--
So *Like* this page, *Subscribe* or *Follow* me.[/FONT]


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## feralpen (Aug 26, 2011)

Holy Smokes ! ! ! That could be a companion piece to a poem I did a while back. Great minds? ? ? 

fp :friendly_wink:


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## rundahl (Aug 27, 2011)

Ok, you got me, where to now. Love the theme. I'm split on the interpretation. On one hand I feel this creepy sense of manipulation.

Through fabrications styled upon cascade,
With vim, I tell your browser what to do;
Determine what ideas are conveyed
On your computer and your mobile, too.

Your feedback on this document is key--
So *Like* this page, *Subscribe* or *Follow* me.

-On the other hand you personify the pop up giving it voice. awsome.


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## Bloggsworth (Aug 27, 2011)

Brilliant illustration of how the program controls us while we think we are telling it what to do. Only one small point, the penultimate line of the 3rd stanza is missing one stress/syllable as it doesn't flow as well as the rest of the piece, which is a pity.


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## aj47 (Aug 27, 2011)

Thank you all.

What I was attempting to accomplish is two things.  A) a sonnet including that pesky _volta_ and B) an expression of how cool it is to be an HTML programmer.  So there are a lot of layered meanings in there.  My editor happens to be named _vim_ for instance. And Bloggsworth, when I read it it sounds right. It may be a dialectic difference in pronunciation but I'll explore alternatives anyway.  There was a similar issue with another line when I took it to my writer's group.  

Thank you all again.


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## Jane Martin (Aug 28, 2011)

I read over it a few times & that line seems fine to me.  It's a flawless piece, good job.  I dont find sonnets easy to work with, as you can see from the one I've posted at the minute that I'm struggling with :-/  You've made it look easy with this one!  Your enthusiasm for your work really shines through.


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## aj47 (Aug 28, 2011)

Thank you.  I didn't know this would be a sonnet till I had 3 stanzas and thought, "If this is a sonnet, it needs a _volta_..." and thought of one.


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## Chesters Daughter (Sep 13, 2011)

What a perfect choice for your title, Annie. Structurally, this is spot-on, kudos from one who consistently shies away from the restraint of form. I really appreciate it when someone puts their all into tying themselves down, lol, that doesn't sound too nice although it's meant to be. As to S3, L3, there are only nine syllables as opposed to the ten of every other line, but your stresses are properly placed (such orderly feet you have, lol) so as not to cause a hitch or be noticeable, at least to me. As with all your work, you deftly weave double meanings and scrumptious layers that I find so very appealing. You are one very clever lady. Enjoyed to extremes.

Best,
Lisa


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## aj47 (Sep 13, 2011)

S3L3 is _Determine what ideas are conveyed_  I parse that as deTERmine WHAT iDEas ARE conVEYED.   How are you parsing it?

And thank you for the kind words.  I really like writing stuff where I can play and the structure keeps me from going off the deep end.  I love structure because at heart I'm a rules-lawyer and I like being able to say, "_I_ followed the rules, so you can, too."


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## Chesters Daughter (Sep 13, 2011)

Bingo, I'm reading it the same as you are. Regional inflections can really mess with flows. I gotta give you (and all those who post in this sub-forum) loads of credit, Annie, writing in form is not easy. Truth be told, meter was my nemesis, although we've since become reluctant friends. I've never even attempted a sonnet, although I'm sure I will eventually. Probably will fail miserably, but at least I can say I tried. I envy you your dedication, but after the freedom of writing free verse, I'm the kid stuck in perpetual time-out for refusal to follow the rules. Even when I write metered verse, I don't care too much about syllable counts per line and focus more on stresses. But I do try to keep the count fairly consistent because it turns into a disaster if I don't. Sonnets (I don't dare even touch on villanelles and sestinas) require rigid adherence to both syllable counts and rhyme schemes (and no getting by a slant rhyme, lol) that is a extremely difficult task on its own, but you, talented Miss, fold in fabulous layered content to boot. You are a force to be reckoned with, my dear, and I'm so glad you're here.


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## aj47 (Sep 14, 2011)

It's difficult to express my feeling on this.  I am talented, etc. but I also recognize that I'm still, in many ways, a rookie, learning the ropes and making rookie gaffes.   Thank you for your appreciation of myself and my works.   It means a great deal.


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