# Where Do Dragons Go?



## Firemajic (Aug 16, 2016)

*Tanit's silver scales turned to tarnish
her emerald eyes empty and dim
she wept as she was dying
and her wounded webbed wings withered

Ruby blood stained the stones
puddles pooled around her
silver scales shivered with sorrow
and her wounded webbed wings withered

A new star shimmered in the silver sky
as the Dragon breathed her last breath
a wicked wind raged and wailed
and her wounded webbed wings withered

That emerald star in the shimmering sky...
is that the dragon's eye?
The weeping wind that woos the night...
is that from the Dragon's flight?

Who really knows where Dragons go
when at last, their webbed wings wither...



***Tanit, a Phoenician myth name of a goddess of love, moon and stars
possibly meaning "Serpent Lady [Dragon]
*


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## rcallaci (Aug 17, 2016)

*In a Dragon's Eye*

Julia (Firemajic)

The feeling, depth, and tone, of this piece runs through a gamut of emotions: sadness, wonder, joy, and sorrow. 

*Sadness and sorrow* at hearing about this living goddess, this wondrous dragon, withering and dying away. This readers eye’s watered up as those magnificent wings withered and disappeared into the ether.

*Wonder and Joy* at looking up in the sky and seeing her eye. Her wings healed and fully spread. That Tanit, (The Goddess of Love) still lives in the stars watching over us. Who really knows? I know through hope and belief, as this poem hints and indicates at.

The only nit, S1L3- typo-missed s- (a) to (as).

The musicality of this piece through your brilliant use of alliteration and assonance made this piece sing and soar within my inner ear as I danced with Tanit in the bright corridors of my mind. 

All the verses were masterly written but the most breathtaking one was (at least for me) S3- It sang to my soul- The imagery in this Stanza is truly magnificent. 

*A new star shimmered in the silver sky
as the Dragon breathed her last breath
a wicked wind raged and wailed
and her wounded webbed wings withered
*
The second line is a most wondrous line to speak out. It doesn’t just trip off your tongue it makes your tongue moist up in wonder. 

This poem is a creative masterpiece, a pure delight to read and ponder on. What makes this a truly great poem is the pure musicality of the piece without rhyme; done through the masterful use of wordcraft using alliteration and assonance to perfection. 

Now I love dragons, myth, and the gods---you wrote a piece that truly wove its way into my heart. 

This I can honestly say is your best work and that’s saying a lot, the pinnacle of your dragon series.


My warmest
bob


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## Phil Istine (Aug 17, 2016)

That was an enjoyable read that tripped my tongue as well as my emotions.
I wondered initially if the alliteration had been overdone, but a second read had me feeling that it was fine, and just added to the piece's power.

I keep having my eye pulled to S3 L2 "*as the Dragon breathed her last breath" *and trying to feel ways to strengthen that.
I have come up with "gasped" for "breathed" as it has a vowel sound like "last".
I tinkered around with it a bit and came up with several possible permutations.
1) Just dropping "breath" - but that would make the line too short and sacrifice meter.
2) "as the dragon gasped her final xxx (flame feels too contrived).

I didn't quite get there but feel that the word(s) must exist.  Somehow, it just felt that the "death" line needed a bit more punch.
I tell you, this piece rocked.  I loved it.

I sense this work may be a metaphor, one that I actually understand for a change, though I could be wrong.


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## Firemajic (Aug 18, 2016)

Maestro, I am overjoyed that you got the nuances of all the emotions I tried to express, and I am thrilled that you recognized all that I put into the writing of this poem.. I am very proud of it... However, it was only through your mentoring, patience and dedication to poetry, and indeed YOUR poetry, that has given me the skills that I need to write, so for all of that, I am so grateful, and I thank you, you have always inspired my fire... 

Phil, this poem is about change, about how no one is truly lost to us forever,  thank you for understanding that...
I will give thought to the line you discussed... Thank you for your insight and feedback, I appreciate.. 

Thank you to everyone who "Liked" this poem...


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## TKent (Aug 18, 2016)

Wow Fire, this is spectacular!! I absolutely adore it. Seriously one of my favorites of yours!!!


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## Darkkin (Aug 18, 2016)

An amazing piece of work.  Only nit I have is with the phrasing turned to tarnish in S1, L1.  Silver does not turn _into_ tarnish, like a patina is accrues on the surface of the metal.  A different verb more in keeping with the process might work a little better.  e.g. taken by tarnish, traced in tarnish, trapped in tarnish, tamed by tarnish, tainted by tarnish...The possibilities are manifold, while still maintaining the subtle alliteration of the line.

Overall, spectacular.

- D. the T.


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## Bard_Daniel (Aug 18, 2016)

Death and creation and poetic prowess through and through.

Thank you Julia, it was great.


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## Firemajic (Aug 19, 2016)

TKent said:


> Wow Fire, this is spectacular!! I absolutely adore it. Seriously one of my favorites of yours!!!





Thank you TKent ! I am delighted  

DarKKin, I had reservations about using the word "tarnished" in the context that I did... however, I pulled out my poetic license, and let it slide...   Thank you, I will rethink that... I appreciate your insight and feedback...

Daniel, thank you for reading, and taking the time to comment, I appreciate it so much..


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## Bloggsworth (Aug 19, 2016)

On to bad television programmes...


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## Firemajic (Aug 19, 2016)

Bloggsworth said:


> On to bad television programmes...




LMAO.... I am not insulted at all.... This poem was written for the young reader....anyway, I now return you to "Sponge Bob Square Pants, and the mystery of the crabby patty".... enjoy...


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## escorial (Aug 19, 2016)

so you this piece..cool


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## SilverMoon (Aug 19, 2016)

> LMAO.... I am not insulted at all.... This poem was written for the young reader....anyway, I now return you to "Sponge Bob Square Pants, and the mystery of the crabby patty".... enjoy...  :wink:



Not sure if this gem of a reply is "tongue in cheek" (LOL) But assuming it is not - please allow me to disagree with you.

Now, the song, "Puff the Magic Dragon" is for the young ear (only when old enough to understand that it's about smoking weed).

 From what I've read of your work, this poem is your best for all the reasons stated (this is what I get for coming in late)

This is one sophisticated piece and I will say brilliant & inspiring. And way over a child's head unless he/she were a Literary Prodigy. 

I did not know this was a series and will have to search your threads for more. I am off to read it again because I love when I get stars in my eyes. 

Laurie :star: :star:


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## Ariel (Aug 19, 2016)

Personally, if read knowing that Tanit is a Phonecian goddess of love, then this takes on a new dimension of mature reading. It is very musical and beautiful in sound.

From your footnote (which should be an inscription, I think) this gains not just further mythological aspects but becomes a poem about lost love and grief.  It is very moving.

I'm not sure about "wounded".  I think the four strong w alliterations is a bit much.  Perhaps in one line it can be "webbed wings withered" and the next "wounded wings withered?"  It would unfold more information as it went and wouldn't be too much of an alteration from the repeating line. I wanted a complete rhyme in stanza 4 but the rest of the poem doesn't rhyme at all so it might be ok.


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## Firemajic (Aug 19, 2016)

Thank you Escorial... I always enjoy your comments..

SiverMoon, High praise indeed, from a Poet of your expertise... fabulous, and I appreciate...

Amsaw... I fixed the rhyme.... In my new poem "Where do Dragons Come From" there is a 4 line rhyme... Thank you...
the refraining line has to be a strong line, and if I remove a word, it causes a glitch to the rhythm I hear in my head...but I do agree that the alliteration and assonance may be over done... Thank you so much for your feedback... I value it...


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