# Will God?



## Cato (Jul 15, 2015)

Will God be mocked by mortal men?
Or have his Son despised again.
Should he come down a second time,
Will mocking men reject I AM?
The wise of now do cut and bite,
And standing sneer at our delight,
The glory of his perfect grace;
The treasure of his chosen race.
Will God his burning rage restrain,
And have the righteous pray in vain?
He will not wait whose children cry
“Come rescue me or else I die.”
His Holy anger, flaming flies
And calls him from his throne “Arise.”
So stirring from his golden throne,
He comes and claims what is his own.



:Based off some notes I took in church and some stuff I was reading:


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## McJibbles (Jul 15, 2015)

Cato said:


> Should he come down a second time,
> Will mocking men reject I AM?
> 
> He will not wait whose children cry
> ...



Ok, just a few things. Recuse to rescue. Couplet of time and I AM could stay, but being a rhyme lover I want to see you brainstorm and find a fit that still conveys God's power. (like I'm gonna do it? Psshht) also put a comma after anger because I thought it helped with your rhythm. Lastly, "or else" sounds phony next to the rest of your powerful diction.

Those are my notes; great job and keep the faith.


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## Mesafalcon (Jul 15, 2015)

Cato said:


> So stirring from his golden throne



So, God has a golden throne? He could probably sell that for a fortune.

A) the novelty of having something that belonged to "the" God, and B) just how much all that gold must be worth!

Do you think God will sell it? Will God?


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## musichal (Jul 15, 2015)

"When he comes down to earth again" would fill the bill with a strong slant-rhyme," answering McJ's nit.
Suggest changing "wise of now" to "worldly wise."
I would probably change "chosen race" to something else.
Those were my nits. Good poem.  I like it.


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## Firemajic (Jul 15, 2015)

Cato said:


> Will God be mocked by mortal men?
> Or have his Son despised again.
> Should he come down a second time,
> Will mocking men reject I AM?
> ...





Powerful message! Love your style... Thanks for sharing.. Peace..


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## QDOS (Jul 15, 2015)

[FONT=&Verdana]Cato – ‘Will God’ to me is a bit jumbled, just a small rearrangement into four line groups and each beginning with ‘Will God... etc.’ I feel would add more weight to the flow. 
Well done it need further working but has a lot of potential.[/FONT]

*For example*
Will God[FONT=&Verdana] be mocked by mortal men?
Or have his Son despised again.
Should he come down a second time,
Will mocking men reject I AM?
WILL God glory in perfect grace;
As the treasure of his chosen race.
The wise who now do cut and bite,
And standing sneer in there delight,
Will God his burning rage restrain,
And have the righteous pray in vain?
He will not wait whose children cry                  [/FONT]
  [FONT=&Verdana] “Come rescue me or else I die.”
Will God in Holy anger, flaming flies
And calls him from his throne “Arise.”
So stirring from his golden throne,
He comes and claims what is his own.

QDOS
[/FONT]


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## Cato (Jul 15, 2015)

Doing this completely throws the meter.


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## musichal (Jul 15, 2015)

Cato said:


> Doing this completely throws the meter.



I think it is a good idea, you can fix the meter.
If that were your only objection, I mean.


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## Cato (Jul 15, 2015)

musichal said:


> I think it is a good idea, you can fix the meter.
> If that were your only objection, I mean.



I will revise it  - thanks everyone for the advise and criticism


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## aj47 (Jul 15, 2015)

Cato said:


> Will God be mocked by mortal men?
> Or have his Son despised again.
> Should that be a ? at the end?
> Should he come down a second time,
> ...



Very cool.  I see others recommended things also, but didn't read them in-depth--will do so now and I may be back.


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## QDOS (Jul 15, 2015)

Cato -[FONT=&Verdana]My critique, appraisal was not an indepth one and certainly not a criticism. 
By example - I was only trying to show you one possibility. 

QDOS
[/FONT]


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