# The Greatest Crime in the English Language



## Jinn Master (Apr 3, 2009)

There is a horrible new demon, a new epidemic, a new disease, that has been encroaching upon us all. This evil is like, annoying. Like, when I, like, go to attempt to like, listen to someone like, because of this insidious evil, it becomes, like, difficult. Like, for the love of Christ!
         Like, in all seriousnes, you cannot, like, take seriously anyone who, like, does this. Their message, like, may be, like, valid, and all, but, like, they are hard to, like follow. This doesn't, like, just apply to like, younger people, either. It applies to like, everyone. This evil like, affects all ages, like, really.
         I do apologize, because I like, ramble, and like, sometimes I like, talk alot.
         Oh well. Because I like, talk alot, and I like, sometimes forget what I was talking about, or what I was like, doing. Like now for instance, I honestly like, forgot what I was rambling against.
         Like, damn.












I hope that hurt as much reading it as hearing it. I feel I could make it less annoying and turn it into a bit of a humorist piece, but I'm not really sure where to start.


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## SparkyLT (Apr 3, 2009)

Jinn Master said:


> I hope that hurt as much reading it as hearing it. I feel I could make it less annoying and turn it into a bit of a humorist piece, but I'm not really sure where to start.


It did. Thanks a lot. Well done. uker:


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## Jinn Master (Apr 3, 2009)

It makes me feel particularly odd to write something horrible on purpose, but it seems to have gotten a somewhat positive response. I wrote it at school and handed a copy to everyone who talks that way. The incidences of people saying "like" fell to almost none for about two weeks. And, thanks.


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## SparkyLT (Apr 3, 2009)

Cool. I'd've never thought that would work. Didn't last, though, did it?


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## Jinn Master (Apr 3, 2009)

No, it didn't last. Wish it had, though. It didn't make people want to change the way they spoke, but everyone began to point it out. I guess not saying "like" just saved time.


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## terrib (Apr 4, 2009)

I am so, ah...._like...._laughing.....


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## Jinn Master (Apr 4, 2009)

Aaaw. I was hoping you might be _really_ laughing


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## Team 2012 (Apr 4, 2009)

What's not to like?


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## Jinn Master (Apr 4, 2009)

If I were to go about making this a slightly longer humorist piece instead of a short satire, would you all reccommend a short snippet after the main part, or actually integrating it into a long semi-essay that makes its point both through the use of the word like, and the explanation of why it is so annoying, and foul?

I'm leaning towards the latter myself.


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## Wolfson (Apr 4, 2009)

Like... um... there's only so far you could... like... you know... _go_ with a piece that was... like... like that... but... um... if you... like... broaden your... you know... like... target, it just... like... might work. You know?


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## Olly Buckle (Apr 4, 2009)

Well, you know, it's not that like doesn't annoy me, you know, but there are other things, you know, and you know they can be just as annoying you know* if you see what I mean* (I put it in bold because that is another one, if you see what I mean).


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## seigfried007 (Apr 4, 2009)

Like, LOL, or something.


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## Jinn Master (Apr 4, 2009)

Olly Buckle said:


> Well, you know, it's not that like doesn't annoy me, you know, but there are other things, you know, and you know they can be just as annoying you know* if you see what I mean* (I put it in bold because that is another one, if you see what I mean).




Mind if I take that and run with it? Do another one?


If anyone wouldn't mind making suggestions for that, I think I'll write more, and have it as one long article. If you know what I mean


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## Jinn Master (Apr 5, 2009)

There is a horrible new demon, a new epidemic, a new disease, that has been encroaching upon us all. This evil is like, annoying. Like, when I, like, go to attempt to like, listen to someone like, because of this insidious evil, it becomes, like, difficult. Like, for the love of Christ! Do you know what I mean?
           You know, in all seriousness, you cannot, like, take seriously anyone who, like, does this. Their message, like, may be, like, valid, and all, but, like, they are hard to, like follow. This doesn't, like, just apply to like, younger people, either. It applies to like, everyone, you know?. This evil like, affects all ages, really, you know?.
         I do apologize, because I like, ramble, and like, sometimes I like, talk alot.
Oh well. Because I like, talk alot, and I like, sometimes forget what I was talking about, or what I was like, doing. Like now for instance, I honestly like, forgot what I was rambling against. You know what I mean?
         Like, damn, you know?
                Oh, wait. I remember now. Don't you seriously hate that? I'll never understand, you know, the different things that I see as you know, like, crimes, in the English language. Grammar seems to making a decline, if you know what I mean. I hate it, you know? I can't seem to find a reason for people to use words to try and, you know, add a pause to a sentence, instead of just pausing. You know what I mean? Seriously. 
               I have a solution to like, this horrible thing, too. If people would, you know, gain more confidence in, you know, the way they speak, we could completely like, eliminate all of this from our language. Or, we could always force people to wear like, shock collars, you know? That ought to, you know, cut down on the number of people doing stuff like that.
             You know what I mean?










There we go


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## ash somers (Apr 5, 2009)

i dunno what all the fuss is about, i mean
this shit's been around, for like ever *shrug*
have you been under a rock & only just noticed?

_There is a horrible new demon, a new epidemic, a new disease_

*pffft*


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## Jinn Master (Apr 5, 2009)

Oh, I won't disagree that that type of thing has been around for a long time. I don't think "like" has, though.


Besides- poetic license


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## ash somers (Apr 5, 2009)

like has too, there was an aussie comedian chick
who use to rip the bag out of people who do it
it got a laugh for a while, but the novelty
like wore off after the hundredth time



> Besides- poetic license :razz:



and yeah, i have one of those too


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## Jinn Master (Apr 5, 2009)

Hehe.

I love how they never expire.


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## ash somers (Apr 5, 2009)




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## The Backward OX (Apr 5, 2009)

terrib said:


> I am so, ah...._like...._laughing.....


 Jinn, here's another one into which you can get your teeth. 

People saying "so" as in the above example.


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## The Backward OX (Apr 5, 2009)

ash somers said:


> i dunno what all the fuss is about, i mean
> this shit's been around, for like ever *shrug*
> have you been under a rock & only just noticed?
> 
> ...


He was being sardonic.

And it's people like you who are responsible for the eroding of standards.

Fortunately there are some who take pride in speaking correctly.

So, _*pfftt*_ yourself, you crabby old woman.


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## Jinn Master (Apr 5, 2009)

I'll see what I can do with the "so"


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## ash somers (Apr 6, 2009)

The Backward OX said:


> He was being sardonic.
> 
> And it's people like you who are responsible for the eroding of standards.
> 
> ...



it's *pffft* with three f's 
and one t *shakes head*
don't you know anything? 

listen to me you busy body 
i knew exactly what he was being
and i'll fathom a guess jinn already knows
exactly how to take me in return, so bugger off
go find somebody else to stalk & annoy the shit out of 

and i'm only crabby with you, i'm fine with everybody else


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## Jinn Master (Apr 6, 2009)

This is better than television.


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## Olly Buckle (Apr 9, 2009)

Jinn Master said:


> This is better than television.



Not "I love Lucy" again?


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## ash somers (Apr 9, 2009)




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## The Backward OX (Apr 9, 2009)

Olly Buckle said:


> Not "I love Lucy" again?


Spare m' days. It lives, it breathes, it buckles up.


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## Olly Buckle (Apr 10, 2009)

Well you know, it was actually, just like, well you know , innit
  Just then like, it was actually, well you know , just like , innit
  I mean innit just like , you know what I mean , just like, you know, innit
  So anyway, and then, so he said so she said,
  Quick as a flash he’s right on it
  Oh yeah, srite innit
  You think I’m stupid innit
  Anyway no straight up


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