# Pet hates



## IanMGSmith (Mar 9, 2012)

Taking a que from Olly's ire at having to digest a certain pronunciation of the word "garage"...

How I hate the low-life who lets off wind and then, with cheesy grin, looks at you and says, "*Better out than in*". 

Believe me, there are people out there who seem to take delight in doing this. They have no idea how close to death they come.

How about you, any (almost humorous) pet hates?


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## philistine (Mar 9, 2012)

There seems to be an almost nationwide epidemic in America, where its residents (God bless them) seem to have the burgeoning proclivity of saying the following:



> I could care less.



It renders the phrase completely superfluous. Using the general you for a second here; you'd be better off saying absolutely nothing at all. _I couldn't care less_, on the other hand, states outright that your interest in the matter could not wane any further.

Also, the former colonies tend to confuse 'loose' with 'lose'. I've no idea why, though it most certainly seems to be an American foible. 

To digress from the grammatical for a moment, I'd have to say that persons with no spacial awareness tend to get on my tits very quickly. Walking through the city centre on the busiest market street, only to find a middle-aged chap, who was previously walking at a steady pace in front of you- stop altogether in some trivial business or other, leaving you stood there fuming like a broken gas light.

Also, Facebook or its associated ilk.


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## JosephB (Mar 9, 2012)

I don't really have many pet hates, and the few I have can mostly be avoided by minding my own business or ignoring them. Pet hates or peeves generally aren't things that really matter all that much. Many others, I've heard voiced ad nauseum and are pretty cliche -- so rehashing them isn't all that interesting to me.


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## Rustgold (Mar 9, 2012)

Yeah I hate pets.  Most of them are disgusting creatures, smelly, and their poop sticks out the neighborhood.  And that's just the dogs.  I haven't begun on the owners, or the cats.

Oh,you didn't mean pets in the literal sense.  Nah, I gave up on having any pet hates years ago (that fuse blew from overload).


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## Marionmaz67 (Mar 24, 2012)

As I am becoming a bit of Grumpy Old Woman, aside from a long list of pet hates involving bad manners, 80% of which involves roads and driving, it is when people say "Literally" for emphasis and then proceed to speak in metaphors etc that could not possibly be taken literally: I.e: I _literally _DIED laughing. Unless of course I am a psychic medium without knowing it, that is not literal and detracts from the strength of the expression. Rant over.


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## shadowwalker (Mar 24, 2012)

Two that tend to stick out more than others are perpetual victims (nothing is ever their fault or just life), and real victims who are made out to be heroes (just because they survived a catastrophe doesn't make them heroes - they're survivors). Other irritants I can usually either do something about or walk away from (literally or figuratively :-D )


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## Tiamat (Mar 24, 2012)

The phase "It is what it is."  I grit my teeth every time I hear it, though I don't have a particularly good reason for hating it.


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 25, 2012)

shadowwalker said:


> Two that tend to stick out more than others are perpetual victims (nothing is ever their fault or just life), and real victims who are made out to be heroes (just because they survived a catastrophe doesn't make them heroes - they're survivors). Other irritants I can usually either do something about or walk away from (literally or figuratively :-D )



...how about "celebrities" who are just unknown names (unless we read junk) with no claim to fame other than the promotional nominations of their sponsors?


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 25, 2012)

Tiamat10 said:


> The phase "It is what it is." I grit my teeth every time I hear it, though I don't have a particularly good reason for hating it.



How about "it ain't what it ain't"? LOL 

Hey Tia, I'm one of those cantankerous old sods who is always tempted to say, "So who *did* you tell" when someone says, "Oi ain't told no one".


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## shadowwalker (Mar 25, 2012)

IanMGSmith said:


> ...how about "celebrities" who are just unknown names (unless we read junk) with no claim to fame other than the promotional nominations of their sponsors?



Oh yeah - they go right along in my list! (I have no idea who 90% of these people on magazine covers are any more - and I don't think I want to.)


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## philistine (Mar 25, 2012)

IanMGSmith said:


> ...how about "celebrities" who are just unknown names (unless we read junk) with no claim to fame other than the promotional nominations of their sponsors?



They make my piss boil.


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## wyf (Mar 25, 2012)

philistine said:


> They make my piss boil.




that must REALLY hurt!

I hate Ians fart people. I hate people who think they're above having pet hates. I really hate celebrities who only seem to be famous because a certain kind of magazine endlessly bombards us with pictures of them.

I most of all hate those magazines, who put stupid people on pedestals just so they can knock them off again and make fun of them.

just for balance, I like cake, and chocolate.


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## alanmt (Mar 25, 2012)

On my way home, I come over a bridge and traffic is heavy in the right lane as everyone is going to take an exit on the right side just after the bridge. I despise the people who zip into the left lane, which is not so busy, and speed up to pass the long line of cars and then try to cut in front of me to reenter my lane so they can make the exit quicker.

I don't let them in my lane. They have to drive to the next exit and turn around, the selfish line-cutting %$*&*(%$s. If you wouldn't cut in line at the supermarket, you shouldn't on the highway.


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 25, 2012)

wyf said:


> that must REALLY hurt!
> 
> I hate Ians fart people. I hate people who think they're above having pet hates. I really hate celebrities who only seem to be famous because a certain kind of magazine endlessly bombards us with pictures of them.
> 
> ...



*LOL
*


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 25, 2012)

alanmt said:


> On my way home, I come over a bridge and traffic is heavy in the right lane as everyone is going to take an exit on the right side just after the bridge. I despise the people who zip into the left lane, which is not so busy, and speed up to pass the long line of cars and then try to cut in front of me to reenter my lane so they can make the exit quicker.
> 
> I don't let them in my lane. They have to drive to the next exit and turn around, the selfish line-cutting %$*&*(%$s. If you wouldn't cut in line at the supermarket, you shouldn't on the highway.



I agree, although generally drivers in this country are much more considerate than where I came from. Over there they might shoot through the windows with live ammo.

I'm always helping lorries pull in and out and I try to imagine that queue hoppers are desperately late or whatever. Still makes me boil a bit. 

Once I was the culprit. Not concentrating on a trip down the M1 to London I suddenly found myself passing a queue on the right and I could see the cars and trucks nosing up to the next in order to prevent me cutting in. Of course, I understood their anger and with nowhere to go but forward I drove until there was a seemingly safer spot to stop and I decided to sit there until it cleared or the police arrived, whichever came first. I was awoken by some loud hooting as some lorry driver kindly, but somewhat impatiently, had decided to let me in. 

I frantically re-started the motor and waved a thank-you to the driver.

About 30 minutes had passed since my momentary lapse in concentration.


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## Kat (Mar 26, 2012)

I will often have a few teenage girls at my house, my oldest is 14. The text speak drives me insane.


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## Potty (Mar 26, 2012)

Fatties in a mobility scooter. (If you got up and walked you might not need it!)


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## Potty (Mar 26, 2012)

Ramblers with ski poles! I even saw someone hiking through Banbury town centre sporting the damned things!


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## Potty (Mar 26, 2012)

People who say "Swearing is a sign of a poor vocab"


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## Potty (Mar 26, 2012)

People who say tickle with a 'G' "Tiggle"


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## Gamer_2k4 (Mar 26, 2012)

I can't stand referential humor.  Anything that's "funny" because the recipient can think "oh hey, I recognize that, ha ha," isn't funny at all.  Memes in general are probably the worst offenders, like "The cake is a lie," or "I used to be an adventurer but then I took an arrow to the knee."  Those things aren't funny by themselves, yet idiots choke themselves laughing about them because they've played (or have heard of) Portal and Skyrim.

Actually, nerd humor in general just bugs me.  For example, there's a picture with a guy painting a wave form on a fence with the caption "Gang sines."  Oh hahahaha! I took trigonometry in high school too! That's hilarious!

...Or maybe not.

The problem with geeky humor is that too many people who aren't smart use it to pretend that they are.  That just bugs the heck out of me.


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 26, 2012)

Potty said:


> People who say "Swearing is a sign of a poor vocab"



From personal experience I can add that some of the worst swearing is a sign of poor coordination, especially during d.i.y. season.


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 26, 2012)

Gamer_2k4 said:


> The problem with geeky humor is that too many people who aren't smart use it to pretend that they are. That just bugs the heck out of me.



I've known people like that, they also think themselves sooo sophisticated, "sniffing" and "tasting" wines with fancy names when all they are really doing is getting pissed and destroying their lives and livers. Addicts! Bah! Humbugg! ...or is that being too harsh?


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## alanmt (Mar 26, 2012)

Gamer_2k4 said:


> I can't stand referential humor.  Anything that's "funny" because the recipient can think "oh hey, I recognize that, ha ha," isn't funny at all.  Memes in general are probably the worst offenders, like "The cake is a lie," or "I used to be an adventurer but then I took an arrow to the knee."



One does not simply walk into humor.


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## Tiamat (Mar 27, 2012)

alanmt said:


> On my way home, I come over a bridge and traffic is heavy in the right lane as everyone is going to take an exit on the right side just after the bridge. I despise the people who zip into the left lane, which is not so busy, and speed up to pass the long line of cars and then try to cut in front of me to reenter my lane so they can make the exit quicker.
> 
> I don't let them in my lane. They have to drive to the next exit and turn around, the selfish line-cutting %$*&*(%$s. If you wouldn't cut in line at the supermarket, you shouldn't on the highway.


Hey, I do that too!  In fact, I did it just this morning, except I wasn't on a highway and the guy was trying to pass me on the right (shortly before the right lane veers off and the left lane keeps going straight).  Yeah, I was thoroughly satisfied when the guy flipped me the bird and was forced to follow the right lane into suberbia instead of continuing through town.  I waved.


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## felix (Mar 27, 2012)

- Impatience. I tend to be in a perpetual state of airy contentment, not in a fairy-like la de da fashion, but merely laid back. However, it's a huge shock to me when I see somebody become annoyed by trivial matters, such as when somebody puts a sour puss on their face when they hear that the movie that they wanted to see is fully booked. Who cares? You're alive, aren't you? Are you not in fact incredibly wealthy by the standards of the average human being? Do you not intend to go home later after a superflous and delicious meal prepared for you by trained chefs, who will bring you whatever you desire? Do you not then intend to gorge yourself on beer and wine? And then do you not intend to fall into bed and proceed to sleep for the next thirteen hours? Just see another film, you wretched dolt, and do remember to be flabbergasted by your incredibly luck in life. 

- Television. I don't care what's on or what fatuous celebrity they've brought on this week, because people like that; that's what sells, so of course the production companies are going to do that. My pet hate refers to watching television for long stints, not wanting to change the channel for no reason at all other than the fact that it's successfully blocking your woes and worries for the day. When my girlfriend comes over for the weekend she sits before my television at 1 PM and then proceeds to watch her 'marathon' of programs, which consists of four soap operas of varying scum factors, Jeremy Kyle and the usual Britain's Got Talent/X Factor/Strictly Come Dancing.  I wouldn't mind any of this at all, if it weren't for the look on her face when she's watching it all; a slack jawed, dazed stare, utterly glazed over with not a single thought stirring within. It makes me feel sad, not annoyed.

- Mobile Phones (or Cell Phones for our Simple Brethren). If you have information, important information, which must be conveyed, then call me, from a landline, or fax me, or telegraph me, or just come and SEE me. No, I don't want to text you. A conversation which could otherwise be over in thirty seconds takes two hours to unfold, while I'm forced to come away from whatever it is that I'm doing every two minutes in order to type a two word text message, and then try to concentrate once more.


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## JosephB (Mar 27, 2012)

People who complain about cell phones.


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## shadowwalker (Mar 27, 2012)

I don't mind cell phones - I hate texting. And people who think because you have one you should drop everything to respond.


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## JosephB (Mar 27, 2012)

I don't like texting either -- so I rarely respond to them. Everyone knows that now -- so I don't get text messages. And I don't answer every call -- that's what voice mail is for. It's possible to manage how you want to communicate. The problem isn't the technology.


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## Alabastrine (Mar 27, 2012)

Winnie the Pooh...that guy is an ass.


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## Terry D (Mar 27, 2012)

Alabastrine said:


> Winnie the Pooh...that guy is an ass.



No . . . Eeyore was the ass . . .


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## felix (Mar 27, 2012)

JosephB said:


> People who complain about cell phones.



People who complain about people who complain about cell phones...

You're right that it's not the fault of technology, but in the younger generations stating that you're unwilling to text is tantamount to stating that you refuse to speak at all. I never reply to them merely because I have no time for them, but I still get them all the time. And then four hours later I get an angry telephone call. 

When my contract is up I'm just getting a supermarket budget model for emergencies, and giving the number to my girlfriend and parents.


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## JosephB (Mar 27, 2012)

Well, I guess that depends on what you mean by "younger generations" -- maybe people who grew up texting. Most of my friends and co-workers are in their late twenties or early thirties -- so perhaps texting isn't as engrained. Still -- I know younger people who don't do a whole lot of texting and they're not exactly social outcasts.


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## Alabastrine (Mar 27, 2012)

haha..I think Eeyore just needed some Zoloft. Pooh was gluttonous and kept getting stuck. 

Actually,....now that I think about it Rabbit was more of an ass


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## Potty (Mar 27, 2012)

felix said:


> And then four hours later I get an angry telephone call.



Bane of my life! "Why didn't you respond to my text the other day?" "I don't top my phone up." "But I tried to ring you and you didn't answer!"  "Because you made the mistake of putting in the text that you needed a favour."


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## KangTheMad (Mar 27, 2012)

Really unusual names given to kids.


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## blyish (Mar 27, 2012)

I thought this was going to be a thread about the type of pets people hate... I came prepared to argue, since I love all animals (ok, maybe not weird giant roaches and stuff like that)

Too many things annoy me so it would be a long list.


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## Rustgold (Mar 28, 2012)

blyish said:


> I thought this was going to be a thread about the type of pets people hate.


I did try.




Rustgold said:


> Yeah I hate pets. Most of them are disgusting creatures, smelly, and their poop stinks out the neighborhood. And that's just the dogs. I haven't begun on the owners, or the cats.



Day care for dogs, how much stupider can pet owners get?  Oh, just $69 per day or $500 per week to have your dog in a colourful cage while you're at work.  Seriously, do pet owners get money to make up for a lack of grey matter in their heads?
And to anybody who says 'People do it for their children, so why not for our dogs', I have a news flash for you.  Dogs aren't children.


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## blyish (Mar 28, 2012)

Rustgold said:


> Dogs aren't children.



Thank god for that. Children are at the very top of the list of things I can't stand.


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## Jeko (Mar 28, 2012)

Blue riband. Bleeding heck, they're awful. It's like crunching into the debris of an Ikea wardrobe coated in a dead man's excretions. The 'chocolate' is so thin it almost ceases to exist, and overall the bar is a complete insult to the brilliance that similar products share. A Kit Kat is around the same amount of calories, but at least that tastes of _something _other than flat-pack furniture. Someone should do us all a favour and find the person responsible for this and _cube their head.

_
Also, the Go Compare man. If guessing the theme of the next Go Compare advert makes me a prophet, then I should start preaching on a mountain right now. But really, it doesn't, because that poor sap is so predictable you could clean him out by playing poker for fifteen seconds.

The Go Compare man can sing - I'll give him that. But I don't think I could take him seriously if he sang some serious opera - I'd just think all he's saying is Latin for GO COMPARE! GO COMPARE WHEN YOU INSURE YOU MUST BE SURE TO GO COMPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRE! I think it was a great publicity stunt at first, and the second advert was at least bearable. 

But then came the Caribbean remix, and the silent movie, and the alien one that made me scream uncontrollably. It's not funny - it just hurts now. My friends and I have begun inverting the new adverts, and I thought of the Cinderella one before they did. They should also do one of jingle bells - oh what fun it is to ride on a one-horse open sleigh! A one horse-open sleigh, you say? What's the insurance on that? GO COMPARE! GO COMPARE! WHEN IN THE SNOW GO SAVE YOUR DOUGH AT GO COMPARE! INSURE YOUR SLEIGH, AND YOU'RE AWAY! AND YOU'LL THANK YOUR STARS THAT YOU WENT TO GO COMPAAAAAAAAAAAAARE! GO COMPARE. 

No, wait... that would be awful. It would ruin Christmas. And if the Go Compare man wore a Santa outfit, I'd have to kill him.


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 28, 2012)

Cadence said:


> ...And if the Go Compare man wore a Santa outfit, I'd have to kill him.



Kill him, period! ...I never use that site.

Hate all adverts for reasons like:

too many, too intrusive and too interruptive on telly.
annoying and crowding out serious information searches on the internet. (we had good internet before the ad flood)
most adverts insult our intellgence with unsupported and blatantly meaningless claims.
One particular store has halved its prices so many times you don't have to be a maths boffin to work out that the stuff should be virtually free by now, not that you would want any of it anyway, believe me.
adverts cost money and guess who is paying the bill.

Moral of the story, "If your company is confused, don't go telling everyone!"


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## Sunny (Mar 28, 2012)

When my nephew gets a hold of a pair of scissors, and walks around the house cutting up everything in site! 

Blinds, curtains, towels, mits, hats, shoelaces, the cats fur, his own hair, and then of course... my _favourite_... he slices straight through the thong on my brand-spanken-new flip-flops (or _slippers _as some oddballs call them ;0)) Darn 4-year-olds... Bah, anyway!


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## Jeko (Mar 29, 2012)

I just hate adverts for hair products. They're _all _the same. It's just a question like 'Want salon quality hair for a fraction of the price?' and then the question is treated as a statement, as if everyone in the world has said yes, and then the advert introduce something that looks just like the last pile of junk they've released. What if I _don't w_ant salon quality hair for a fraction of the price? Will this product therefore stop me from having it? That's what the adverts say to me. Hence why I never buy female hair products. Might also be because I'm not female...


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 29, 2012)

Cadence said:


> I just hate adverts for hair products. They're _all _the same. It's just a question like 'Want salon quality hair for a fraction of the price?' and then the question is treated as a statement, as if everyone in the world has said yes, and then the advert introduce something that looks just like the last pile of junk they've released. What if I _don't w_ant salon quality hair for a fraction of the price? Will this product therefore stop me from having it? That's what the adverts say to me. Hence why I never buy female hair products. Might also be because I'm not female...



Heh heh, exactly! 

Owned a ladies gym/hairdressing, slimming and beauty salon back in the 80s. If memory serves me correctly, toners, freshners and astringents were just different strength dilutions of witchhazel and the witchhazel cost pennies in bulk. Our beautician did not add any perfumes or colorants so it was "salon quality" for sensitive skins and alergies ...something like that.

Point is, many such products have a very, very small shelf cost and yet so many people are taken in by the costly marketing hype, pay way over the top for them and then wonder why the rich have so much money. LOL

Sometimes I think we are our own worst enemies.


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## BabaYaga (Mar 30, 2012)

Potty said:


> People who say tickle with a 'G' "Tiggle"



Thank god I have never heard anyone do this. It would make me violently angry. I also hate it when people from English descent here pronounce things incorrectly on purpose to make it sound 'South African'. Examples: 

Sink- 'zinc' 
Soup- 'sop'
Pizza-(and this is my worst) 'pit-sa' 

Similarly, America, it's 'aluminium', not, 'aluminum'. 

And the infamous 'alot' in spelling. 

It's okay to make a mistake when pronouncing or spelling a word, it really is, we all do it. And in a country with 11 official languages, I have been guilty of linguistic brain-farts many times. (Sorry Ian). 

But once you've been politely corrected, what excuse do you have to carry on doing it?


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## Kyle R (Mar 30, 2012)

*tiggles BabaYaga with an aluminimum pitsa stick until she explodes in violent anger*


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## Olly Buckle (Mar 30, 2012)

" HELLO, I'M ON THE TRAIN ON MY MOBILE, CAN YOU HEAR ME" 
B***dy miracle if they can't, every one else can.


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## Jeko (Mar 30, 2012)

*Other pet hates:

*People who have already played Skyrim for 200 hours, just to show how devoted they are. I got bored after 50.

People who haven't heard dubstep but hate it anyway.

People who say that they took an arrow to the knee. I'd give them an arrow to the face if I had one.

Mechanical pencils. They're all rubbish and annoying. Just get a normal pencil. 

The Playstation Move. It's a wii with a christmas light on the end.

Most of the female pop industry.

Most of the rest of the pop industry.

Twitter.

The word 'practice'.


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## BabaYaga (Mar 30, 2012)

KyleColorado said:


> *tiggles BabaYaga with an aluminimum pitsa stick until she explodes in violent anger*



At least you spelt aluminium correctly...


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## Bruno Spatola (Mar 30, 2012)

People who feel the need to slag off Justin Bieber on every YouTube video, be it a Bill Dance blooper-reel or just a clip of some fatso falling on their face . . . in HD!


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## Alabastrine (Mar 30, 2012)

Justin Bieber


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## Potty (Mar 30, 2012)

Automated responce thingys at help centres! "Press one if you require etc." I spent (no word of a lie) 13 mins trying to get to an advisor. The problem I had was very specific and there was no option for it on the machine. At one point I was caught in a loop where it would ask me questions that would lead back round to the first question and start all over again.

I've worked it out though. They make them longer and harder so that when you DO finally get through to a human, you're so damned grateful to hear his voice there is no chance you'll yell at him through fear he will disconnect you,.


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## Olly Buckle (Mar 30, 2012)

The other day I heard "I checked the bothered pocket and it was empty"


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## Potty (Mar 30, 2012)

Olly Buckle said:


> The other day I heard "I checked the bothered pocket and it was empty"



what does that even mean?


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## philistine (Mar 30, 2012)

felix said:


> - Impatience. I tend to be in a perpetual state of airy contentment, not in a fairy-like la de da fashion, but merely laid back. However, it's a huge shock to me when I see somebody become annoyed by trivial matters, such as when somebody puts a sour puss on their face when they hear that the movie that they wanted to see is fully booked. Who cares? You're alive, aren't you? Are you not in fact incredibly wealthy by the standards of the average human being? Do you not intend to go home later after a superflous and delicious meal prepared for you by trained chefs, who will bring you whatever you desire? Do you not then intend to gorge yourself on beer and wine? And then do you not intend to fall into bed and proceed to sleep for the next thirteen hours? Just see another film, you wretched dolt, and do remember to be flabbergasted by your incredibly luck in life.
> 
> - Television. I don't care what's on or what fatuous celebrity they've brought on this week, because people like that; that's what sells, so of course the production companies are going to do that. My pet hate refers to watching television for long stints, not wanting to change the channel for no reason at all other than the fact that it's successfully blocking your woes and worries for the day. When my girlfriend comes over for the weekend she sits before my television at 1 PM and then proceeds to watch her 'marathon' of programs, which consists of four soap operas of varying scum factors, Jeremy Kyle and the usual Britain's Got Talent/X Factor/Strictly Come Dancing.  I wouldn't mind any of this at all, if it weren't for the look on her face when she's watching it all; a slack jawed, dazed stare, utterly glazed over with not a single thought stirring within. It makes me feel sad, not annoyed.
> 
> - Mobile Phones (or Cell Phones for our Simple Brethren). If you have information, important information, which must be conveyed, then call me, from a landline, or fax me, or telegraph me, or just come and SEE me. No, I don't want to text you. A conversation which could otherwise be over in thirty seconds takes two hours to unfold, while I'm forced to come away from whatever it is that I'm doing every two minutes in order to type a two word text message, and then try to concentrate once more.



I have this blinding ache in the nape of my neck now due to compulsively nodding in agreement. 

The first point I agree with especially. Unfortunately for those of us that have this gripe, we'll find ourselves persistently irritated by it, as it happens *all the time.

EDIT:
*
I'm not sure if this is an exclusively northern phenomenon, though I constantly hear this type of talk when people tell anecdotes or stories which concerned themselves:

1) So I _says_ to Mabel...

2) So I _goes_ down to the post office...

I even heard this once:

3) So I _knows_ that blah, blah, blah...

As soon as I hear it, my fuse burns down, my eyes see red and all I hear is white noise. It is unforgivable.


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## Kevin (Mar 30, 2012)

Re: texting. I don't hate it. I just don't do it. The other day I was out to lunch with a business associate, when he got a text. We were in the middle of a conversation, when his phone beeped, alerting him that he had a message. He immediately started in, something like this:
  "Go*****it! I hate f*****g texting! If they want to talk to me why don't they just f******g call me, instead of having me take all this time to read their message, and then message them back?!"  By this time, his face was bright red, and I was thoroughly amused."Hang on, I got to call this guy." He then proceeded to get on the phone and repeat what he'd just said _at_ the 'perpetrator'.


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## Olly Buckle (Mar 31, 2012)

> I'm not sure if this is an exclusively northern phenomenon, though I constantly hear this type of talk when people tell anecdotes or stories which concerned themselves:
> 
> 1) So I says to Mabel...
> 
> ...



There were two girls on the Tunbridge Wells train last night, late teenage, cut glass accents,
"He was like ... and like I was like, wow like, it was like ... like can you like believe like?"

I wasn't so much annoyed as fascinated, it was like, almost every other word, (or possibly, "like" almost every other word).


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## IanMGSmith (Mar 31, 2012)

Olly Buckle said:


> I'm not sure if this is an exclusively northern phenomenon, though I constantly hear this type of talk when people tell anecdotes or stories which concerned themselves:
> 
> 1) So I says to Mabel...
> 
> 2) So I goes down to the post office...




...a bit like New York street vernacular?

Here in the midlands we are blessed with a quaint slant in which people "were sat on" their gardens getting "rat- arsed" ...gotta love it Olly!


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## felix (Apr 1, 2012)

Olly Buckle said:


> There were two girls on the Tunbridge Wells train last night, late teenage, cut glass accents,
> "He was like ... and like I was like, wow like, it was like ... like can you like believe like?"
> 
> I wasn't so much annoyed as fascinated, it was like, almost every other word, (or possibly, "like" almost every other word).



That's, like, the norm for people of my age. My girlfriend talks that way. 

My favourite is the 'And I was like "OH MY GOD!"' and he was like "I know!"'


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## Potty (Apr 1, 2012)

felix said:


> That's, like, the norm for people of my age. My girlfriend talks that way.
> 
> My favourite is the 'And I was like "OH MY GOD!"' and he was like "I know!"'



This is slightly off topic, but I used to work in this care home where we had a trainee priest come round once a month to visit the elderly folk, part of his priest lessons or something. Nice chap, down to earth sort of bloke. One day he turns up with this older man and introduces him as his boss to which I respond "Hi god, how are you?"

Boomboom!


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## Bilston Blue (Apr 1, 2012)

In my line of work, my first point of contact with a client is usually a 5-10 minute phone conversation, at the end of which an appointment may be made. So, I sign off with something like,"Okay then, Bob, I'll see you next Monday at 4.30." And the reply comes, "Okay. See ya, mate."

Understand. I'm not your mate. You are simply a business acquaintance. Not my mate. Can you hear me? Not my mate.


And another thing. The people who make that first contact with a lazy text message. You want me to teach you to drive yet you can't even be bothered to speak to me first, mate.


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## Potty (Apr 1, 2012)

Bilston Blue said:


> In my line of work, my first point of contact with a client is usually a 5-10 minute phone conversation, at the end of which an appointment may be made. So, I sign off with something like,"Okay then, Bob, I'll see you next Monday at 4.30." And the reply comes, "Okay. See ya, mate."
> 
> Understand. I'm not your mate. You are simply a business acquaintance. Not my mate. Can you hear me? Not my mate.
> 
> ...



Ah, I'm going to have to lock horns with you here. I am one of those people who say "Mate" all the time. I mean nothing by it, it's just my way of signing off. Think of it as the modern day version of "Friend." I.E "Good tidings to you friend!"

I was working with someone a while a go with the same outlook as you, I walked into the kitchen where he was working and said "Anything I can do to help mate?" to which he replied "My names Dave, I'm not your mate."
Since I was being polite and offering help, to have someone react like that was, in my unhumble opinion, anal retentive. He struggled in the kitchen longer than needed as a result.

Heard of 'Innocent till proven guilty'? How about 'Friends till you annoy the heck out of me.'


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## IanMGSmith (Apr 1, 2012)

...all so interesting

The word "mate" seems to have so many meanings and the wonder of English allows us to interpret words according to context.  

Mate *as in mating *has spun into the connotation of joining two pieces of wood or metal together.

Mate *as in ship's mate *(I do hope sailors did not get too pally on long voyages. lol) now covers friends and work colleagues.

Sometimes I have heard the word "mate" used in the most threatening of tones and on some occaisions I could almost swear it was used to suggest that the boss was "no better a person" than the worker who was saying, "Oi think you better talk to my union ...mate!"

In England there still seems to be a bit of "them and us" ...from both sides. LOL


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## Potty (Apr 1, 2012)

I thought it was them and us around the world? When top brass threaten to make cuts, you don't see line managers gathering up the plebs saying "All for one and one for all!". I don't trust management, especially in my line of work. As a support worker, the people who do the actual work (I.E caring for those who pay the wages) are the first to go when cuts are made yet management seem to grow in size. 

Don't trust them and never will. The day management fights my corner, I'm going to start threatening him with 'mate'


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## IanMGSmith (Apr 1, 2012)

Potty said:


> I thought it was them and us around the world? ...



I can only comment on a few countries Potty me darlin' (thats a friendly Leicester equivalent of mate) but none of them seemed to have this hefty divide we find in good old blighty.


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## Potty (Apr 1, 2012)

That's my next pet hate  Managers!


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## IanMGSmith (Apr 1, 2012)

...you tell 'em Potty me dook, another Leicester term for "mate". (smile)

It was my first trip to Leicester and this parking garage attendant kept refering to me as, "me dook" and I thought he had a screw loose. LOL

I really enjoy all the rich ingredients, here in the very womb of English language. I mean all parts of England.


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## Potty (Apr 1, 2012)

I think he might have actually been saying "me duck" but with a heavy accent. "Cheers me duck." "Alright me duck" etc is a common term in some parts of England. Ian am I right in thinking you've moved to the UK from America?


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## IanMGSmith (Apr 1, 2012)

Potty said:


> I think he might have actually been saying "me duck" but with a heavy accent. "Cheers me duck." "Alright me duck" etc is a common term in some parts of England. Ian am I right in thinking you've moved to the UK from America?



...close me duck (smile) - South Africa actually. Thought I'd get away from all those rough-necks down there, only to find most of them were already here. LOL


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## Potty (Apr 1, 2012)

I knew it began with an 'A'


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## Potty (May 17, 2012)

There is this bloke at work (Who I dislike for reasons I won't go into) who says "Tamara!" instead of "Tomorrow!". I once asked if he knew if the word was spelled with an 'O' and a 'W'. He said he did but it's how he has always said it and nothing is going to change that. So I came back with, "what if the world would end if you didn't change." "Well that's never going to happen." "Hypothetically speaking." "It's unrealistic." "I'm speaking hypothetically here." "Impossible."

Which bring me onto my next point:

People who refuse to engage in a hypothetical conversation because it doesn't suit their view point.


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## Rustgold (May 17, 2012)

I've got a new pet hate.  People making completely stupid exaggerated hypotheticals in an attempt to ram through their view point (see numerous threads here for examples).

:razz:


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## Jeko (May 17, 2012)

Motorcycles.


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## Bruno Spatola (May 17, 2012)

Astrology. 

When someone asks me my star-sign, I say I'm a Cancer. They then read me my horoscope and say "Haha, that's just like you!"

That's when I reveal that, actually, I'm not a Cancer. That's when they get upset with me, "It won't work if you lie!"

What a load of bronze-age, IQ-lowering bull shizzle. Do some people honestly believe that 7 billion humans can be lumped into groups like this and correctly assess their personality? I hate it! Even personality quizzes never get it right, and they actually ask you questions about yourself. 

Murder annoys me as well.


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## Potty (May 17, 2012)

Bruno Spatola said:


> Murder annoys me as well.



Yes, this can put a real crimp on your day.


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## Rustgold (May 17, 2012)

Cadence said:


> Motorcycles.



We do our best.



Bruno Spatola said:


> Astrology. When someone asks me my star-sign, I say I'm a Cancer. They then read me my horoscope and say "Haha, that's just like you!"
> What a load of bronze-age, IQ-lowering bull shizzle.



Not disagreeing (as all of these 'faiths' are 'IQ-lowering bull'); however, what you see in the papers isn't actually what astrology was.  The star sign astrology you see in the paper were a 19th(?) century invention, dumbed down for mass marketing.


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## Kevin (May 17, 2012)

Sounds like "the fortune cookie", but how do you explain that they've been _right on the money_ every single time? I mean, it's just fri**in' amazing!


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## Potty (May 17, 2012)

'Coz they generalise and people are generally prepared to find meaning in those sorts of things no matter how insignificant.


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## Deleted member 33527 (May 17, 2012)

I hate it when my mom snaps her fingers at me when she wants me to go wash the dishes or vacuum the house or something, especially when she does it in front of other people. I hate it when people snap their fingers at me in general.

I hate it when I'm trying to tell my brother something important, i.e, "I just won a writing contest!" and he's sitting there texting or facebooking and all he says is something like, "Uh-huh, wow that's great." 

I hate it when I see people texting. Doesn't matter who, doesn't matter where, it just annoys the crap outta me. Yesterday I was in an elevator and this girl was so into her phone that she didn't even notice when everyone dove to press the button so the doors wouldn't close on her. Didn't even say thank you or anything. I hate that.

I hate girls that wear shorts and short skirts in the middle of the winter. 

I hate girls that act like they hate guys they actually like, and vice versa. 

I hate girls that laugh really loud to get a guy's attention. 

I hate stupid girls in general.


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## Potty (May 17, 2012)

Dreamworx95 said:


> I hate it when people snap their fingers at me in general.



I did a carpentry apprenticeship many years ago. My gaff used to get a painter in once a month to spray the sash windows we had made. I remember I was helping the gaff construct something and behind me I heard this continual clicking sound. I looked round to find the painter clicking his fingers at me and pointing to his feet. I crossed my arms and watched him... he carried on for ages until he eventually got the message and said "could you come here please? I need a hand" I walk over and helped him, but not before saying "For future reference, my name's Potty."


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## Deleted member 33527 (May 17, 2012)

I should try that with my mom sometime. I always tell her I hate it when she snaps her fingers but she always forgets. It's like a natural reflex for her or something.

It's one thing for my mom to do it. I mean she's my MOM. But I don't think I could keep my cool if a boss or a teacher or coworker did it.


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## Kevin (May 17, 2012)

Potty said:


> 'Coz they generalise and people are generally prepared to find meaning in those sorts of things no matter how insignificant.


You've burst my bubble.


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## Kevin (May 17, 2012)

Dreamworx95 said:


> I should try that with my mom sometime. I always tell her I hate it when she snaps her fingers but she always forgets. It's like a natural reflex for her or something.
> 
> It's one thing for my mom to do it. I mean she's my MOM. But I don't think I could keep my cool if a boss or a teacher or coworker did it.


 The sarcastic/dull stare reply: You tilt your head a little bit and give them the 'deadpan'(don't blink; don't smile) I thought every teenager had learned that one?


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## Deleted member 33527 (May 17, 2012)

Kevin said:


> The sarcastic/dull stare reply: You tilt your head a little bit and give them the 'deadpan'(don't blink; don't smile) I thought every teenager had learned that one?


Haha, yeah I do that. But how long can it go before it starts to wear off? I'll be 20 in a year!!!


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## Bruno Spatola (May 17, 2012)

Rustgold said:


> We do our best.
> 
> 
> 
> Not disagreeing (as all of these 'faiths' are 'IQ-lowering bull'); however, what you see in the papers isn't actually what astrology was.  The star sign astrology you see in the paper were a 19th(?) century invention, dumbed down for mass marketing.



Hehe, indeed they are.

Thanks for picking me up on that, although I am aware of it -- I was specifically referring to the mainstream newspaper astrology of today, but I didn't really clarify. I'll just say horoscopes next time.


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## Kevin (May 17, 2012)

Dreamworx95 said:


> Haha, yeah I do that. But how long can it go before it starts to wear off? I'll be 20 in a year!!!


Well, depending on the age of the, _trainee(_not the trainer) you may have to reinforce it quite regularly. As with all conditioning, being consistent is everything.


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## Trilby (May 20, 2012)

Dreamworx95 said:


> I hate girls that wear shorts and short skirts in the middle of the winter.
> 
> *Then don't ever visit Newcastle on Tyne.*
> 
> ...



How do you feel about stupid boys?


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## Olly Buckle (May 20, 2012)

Drivers who start braking and drifting towards the middle of the road, then put their offside indicator on. You know that as they do this they might check their mirror in the fraction of a second before they turn, but the manouver starts with the positioning and braking.


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## Jeko (May 20, 2012)

People who say everything is dubstep. Just because they here wub wub.


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## Bruno Spatola (May 20, 2012)

Dubstep.


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## Olly Buckle (May 20, 2012)

What's wrong with dubstep? Love it. Now if you said "Medleys of songs from the musicals" or "ABBA covers" ...  You will be telling me you prefer trance to a bit of good hard techno next. or "You should stick to Neil Young at your age." as one young lady implied the other day. Careful, you will be old before your time.


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## Bruno Spatola (May 20, 2012)

Oh yeah:

Trance.
Techno.


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## IanMGSmith (May 20, 2012)

People who think the Rolling Stones is a curling club in Aberdeenshire where they play wubba wub wub with a string in a tub and a drum made of tin for a scoon. (wink)


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## Olly Buckle (May 21, 2012)

I have mentioned this before somewhere, but I went to visit my friend in Willsden the other day and it enrages me. The woman on the automatic announcement system says after every stop "Number 52, to Willsden Bus Garrige" to rhyme with Harwich or carriage. I shall have to start taking the overground train from Clapham Junction or one day I shall be dragged from the bus screaming insanely that it is spelled with an 'A'.


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## JosephB (May 21, 2012)

Here in the southern U.S., people pronounce all kinds of things differently than I do. I couldn’t care less. Life is too short.


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## blackiris212 (May 21, 2012)

Damn Fatima!
This whole thing makes you sound judgemental and mysoginistic.


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## Olly Buckle (May 21, 2012)

JosephB said:


> Here in the southern U.S., people pronounce all kinds of things differently than I do. I couldn’t care less. Life is too short.



If I was in Atlanta I would expect everybody to pronounce everything differently from me, but I'm not, I'm on the bus from Victoria to Willesden, that's the sort of London journey I have been making since I was about seven or eight, and she doesn't talk as though she works down the chip shop, she speaks nice, standard English, not all posh like recieved, more like an ordinary person's BBC, and then she goes and says "Garrige" like some nineteen forties charwoman. Sorry, rant over.


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## JosephB (May 21, 2012)




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## Olly Buckle (May 22, 2012)

You are right, it still winds me up.


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## The Backward OX (May 22, 2012)

Olly Buckle said:


> the manouver starts with the positioning and braking.



English forum users who don't bother with Spellcheck. [-X


And anyway, if you're such a mind-reader that you know what they're planning, why does it make you mad?


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## Olly Buckle (May 22, 2012)

I know what they are doing, I pay attention and used to be a professional driver, there are plenty of others who don't. 3,000 people died on the roads in the UK last year, an awful lot more were horribly injured, if people took the occasional refresher and drove as they were taught that number could probably be in three figures. How many people mourn those deaths on average? they tend to be young people that die, people with parents and lovers, and like I say lots more broken bones, missing bits and paralysed in various ways, I hate sloppy, careless drivers with a vengeance, I doubt even professional soldiers cause as much mayhem and misery on the whole, after all they only do it in war zones.


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