# Surgery. Ouch.



## JosephB (Jan 31, 2013)

Going in for surgery today. Hint -- I'm a baritone now -- hopefully I won't come out of it as a soprano. And it doesn't start with a "V." (Not ready for that yet.) The doc says I'll be down for the count for 3 days -- and that it will be painful. And if the doc says it will be painful -- you know it will be. Men, I know you can sympathize with the sheer terror I'm now feeling.

Later folks!


----------



## Foxee (Jan 31, 2013)

Good lord, it doesn't start with a 'c' does it? :shock: Best of luck, hope it goes well!


----------



## Bloggsworth (Jan 31, 2013)

Not related to orchids is it? Ouch!


----------



## JosephB (Jan 31, 2013)

Foxee said:


> Good lord, it doesn't start with a 'c' does it? :shock: Best of luck, hope it goes well!



Thanks -- and nope -- that was a big worry -- but we already know it's benign.


----------



## JosephB (Jan 31, 2013)

Bloggsworth said:


> Not related to orchids is it? Ouch!



OK -- I feel really clueless if Jon gets it and I don't.


----------



## Bilston Blue (Jan 31, 2013)

Best of luck Joe. I'm wincing in sympathy.


----------



## moderan (Jan 31, 2013)

Ouch.


----------



## JosephB (Jan 31, 2013)

Thanks guys -- I'm heading out now. I've had various knee surgeries and my appendix out -- never really got nervous about it beforehand -- but this one has me pretty uptight. 

See y'all.


----------



## Ariel (Jan 31, 2013)

Hope it comes out ok.


----------



## alanmt (Jan 31, 2013)

Good luck! Hope they give you some good meds!


----------



## Leyline (Jan 31, 2013)

Hope it's over, and you're recovering, already annoyed by hospital food. And give my suggestion a shot. It can't hurt. 

Best,

-G.


----------



## Bruno Spatola (Jan 31, 2013)

You'll get through it, you're that kind of person if I'm as good a judge of character as I think I am. Speaking about fear can destroy it though, I find; you and yours will be able face to anything. 

I know it's gonna hurt, but I hope you feel as little pain as possible during recovery. Focus on that moment that's just ahead of you: leaving the hospital, healthy and happy. Good luck! I'm an atheist, but may God be with you .


----------



## Jon M (Jan 31, 2013)

Hope you're doing well, and still have both of them intact.


----------



## Staff Deployment (Feb 1, 2013)

If it helps at all, I plan to read all of your future posts in the manliest, gravelliest internal voice possible regardless of your surgery's outcome.


----------



## Gumby (Feb 1, 2013)

Best of luck to you, Joe.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 1, 2013)

Thanks all. Everything went as planned -- so far so good. I'd say the pain is living up to its billing. Not too bad if you don't move. I've got movies to watch, books to read. Something to be said for being waited on hand and foot -- we'll see what my wife has to say about that in a couple of days.

Oh and Bruno -- it was outpatient. I don't know what it's like there -- all but the biggest surgeries are done that way here. No doubt 10 or 15 years ago this would have meant a two day stay in the hospital. They pushed me out the door in less than 2 hours, in the middle of rush hour traffic. I was miserable. An overnight stay at least would have been in order. Not sure what people do who don't have family to take care of them. I'd be in bad shape right now if I was alone.


----------



## Foxee (Feb 1, 2013)

JosephB said:


> Thanks all. Everything went as planned -- so far so good. I'd say the pain is living up to its billing. Not too bad if you don't move. I've got movies to watch, books to read. Something to be said for being waited on hand and foot -- we'll see what my wife has to say about that in a couple of days.


Really glad to hear that you came through it okay, no fun about the pain, though. We wives have a built-in BS detector that lets us know when the invalid's need for help has become...well...invalid. It's very similar to a turkey timer in that we know when it's time for the turkey to get off the couch. 


> Oh and Bruno -- it was outpatient. I don't know what it's like there -- all but the biggest surgeries are done that way here. No doubt 10 or 15 years ago this would have meant a two day stay in the hospital. They pushed me out the door in less than 2 hours, in the middle of rush hour traffic. I was miserable. An overnight stay at least would have been in order. Not sure what people do who don't have family to take care of them. I'd be in bad shape right now if I was alone.


I think that aside from the whole monetary considerations there's a current school of thought that says patients recover better at home. I'm skeptical about this in every case, as you say, what happens if they don't have a very good home to go to?


----------



## JosephB (Feb 1, 2013)

In retrospect, I suppose being transported when the local anesthesia was still in effect made sense. It might have been worse today. Still, you'd have to make arrangements for someone to at least look in on you, because I'm pretty much incapacitated -- maybe they have provisions for that.

And I've got three nurses -- my girls are in on it too, but I can see interest is already waning.


----------



## Bruno Spatola (Feb 1, 2013)

Haha, I bet you feel like Alexander the Great . . . in more ways than one. Ouch indeed. 

Glad you're doing okay; sounds like you're in good hands .


----------



## Sam (Feb 1, 2013)

'Ouch' is not the word! 

Wishing you a speedy and less painful recovery, Joe.


----------



## Staff Deployment (Feb 1, 2013)

Foxee said:


> I think that aside from the whole monetary considerations there's a current school of thought that says patients recover better at home. I'm skeptical about this in every case, as you say, what happens if they don't have a very good home to go to?



The longer you stay in a hospital the more superbacteria you will inevitably be infected with. Homes are safer than hospitals because homes are filled with fewer sick people.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 1, 2013)

Thanks, Bruno and Sam!

Yeah -- that's a pretty big problem -- hospital acquired infections, like MRSA. That actually crossed my mind. Something I read a while back said the most effective way of preventing them was a pretty simple -- hospital workers washing their hands before touching patients -- especially when dealing with central lines and catheters. You would think that would be S.O.P. Anyway -- maybe I was better off at home.


----------



## Leyline (Feb 1, 2013)

Glad you're in the care of those who truly love and cherish you, buddy.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 2, 2013)

Me too. And in that light, I have nothing to complain about.


----------



## Brock (Feb 2, 2013)

Glad all went well.  While we're on the subject of operations "down there," if any of you decide to get a "V," listen to your doctor afterwards.  Don't walk around all day at an auction the following day like I did -- messed me up for a year. :nightmare:


----------



## JosephB (Feb 3, 2013)

Heh. I don't plan on having the pipes shut off just yet -- but I'll keep that in mind.


----------



## alanmt (Feb 3, 2013)

Glad things went smoothly, Joe! Have a great recovery.  Make sure you text one of your nurses at least every ten minutes.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 3, 2013)

That's what the little bell is for. I've been a pretty good patient so far, I think -- but my nurses are going out for most of the afternoon -- maybe a little too much togetherness.


----------



## Eluixa (Feb 3, 2013)

No time like needing people that we realize how much we need our people and how amazingly lucky we are to have them. BTDT. Glad it went well, Joe.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 3, 2013)

Right you are. They've got me all propped up and situated in front of the big screen for the Super Bowl, serving snacks and drinks. It's like watching the game and flying first class.


----------



## Bruno Spatola (Feb 3, 2013)

I wouldn't be able to watch any ball-based games ever again after that kind of surgery. You got gall, boy.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 3, 2013)

Heh. The way things are going, it's looking like the only place I'm going to get hit is my wallet.


----------



## Deleted member 33527 (Feb 3, 2013)

I'm glad everything went smoothly, Joe. You rest and enjoy the Superbowl. Hope the recovery goes by quickly and that you'll be on your feet soon!


----------



## JosephB (Feb 4, 2013)

Thanks, DW.

I'm glad I made plans to work at home for a few days. The doc said I'd be able to go back to work today -- there's absolutely no way I could drive at this point, much less sit at a desk all day. I've learned they tend to minimize recovery times -- not really sure why.


----------



## moderan (Feb 4, 2013)

Insurance company reasons, would be my guess. The hospital had me out to a convalescent center four days after coming out of coma. That way they can push around their papers and forget about the person. Out of sight, out of mind.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 4, 2013)

I'm sure that happens sometimes. The doctor actually called me himself Friday to see how I was doing -- which was surprising -- and someone from his office just called to see how I was doing. I told them I was only incrementally better and she said that "wasn't unusual" but to call Thursday if I didn't see a big improvement. My guess is, everyone's different and they don't know for sure. Maybe they minimize things so you don't get overly concerned and put things off or avoid doing something altogether.


----------



## moderan (Feb 4, 2013)

Doctor sounds human. My primary is, but the hospital personnel didn't seem to be. Good luck anyway.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 5, 2013)

I've had mostly good experiences with docs as far as humanity goes -- with one big exception. They guy who did the biopsy on our baby's liver. This is how he delivered about the worst news a parent can get -- "Your daughter's liver is like shoe leather." I kid you not. I wanted to punch his face in.


----------



## IanMGSmith (Feb 5, 2013)

JosephB said:


> I've had mostly good experiences with docs as far as humanity goes -- with one big exception. They guy who did the biopsy on our baby's liver. This is how he delivered about the worst news a parent can get -- "Your daughter's liver is like shoe leather." I kid you not. I wanted to punch his face in.



...what an oaf!


----------



## moderan (Feb 5, 2013)

JosephB said:


> I've had mostly good experiences with docs as far as humanity goes -- with one big exception. They guy who did the biopsy on our baby's liver. This is how he delivered about the worst news a parent can get -- "Your daughter's liver is like shoe leather." I kid you not. I wanted to punch his face in.


I could share horror stories but I'll save them. I use them for medical characters in my things. Sorry that you had that experience. There must be like public doctor review boards or something though.


----------



## Lewdog (Feb 5, 2013)

Can we call you uniball like the pen company?  I think it should be a prerequisite that all urologist should tell patients on the day of surgery they had just quit caffeine and they can't get their hand to quit shaking.


Most painful surgery ever...have a polinoidal cyst cut out.  Anytime a doctor tells you that a wound has to heal from the inside out, it is going to hurt.


----------



## Leyline (Feb 5, 2013)

JosephB said:


> I've had mostly good experiences with docs as far as humanity goes -- with one big exception. They guy who did the biopsy on our baby's liver. This is how he delivered about the worst news a parent can get -- "Your daughter's liver is like shoe leather." I kid you not. I wanted to punch his face in.



If I'd have been there, man, I'd have done it for you. I've spent the night in jail for less noble causes.


----------



## JosephB (Feb 5, 2013)

Leyline said:


> If I'd have been there, man, I'd have done it for you. I've spent the night in jail for less noble causes.



Yes -- he was a total ass. The nurse was shocked -- and tried to make us feel better by telling us what a great doctor he was. This is at a children's hospital, so you'd think he would have at least learned to fake it. 

On the other hand, we were there for almost 8 weeks, and all the other doctors and nurses were wonderful. I was pretty surprised at the emotion displayed by some, the genuine care and sympathy and by how involved they were. You would think for their own sanity that they would have to be fairly detached, but we didn't get a sense of that at all. Overall, it made a very bad situation just a little bit better and we will always be very grateful for it.


----------



## Leyline (Feb 5, 2013)

> On the other hand, we were there for almost 8 weeks, and all the other doctors and nurses were wonderful. I was pretty surprised at the emotion displayed by some, the genuine care and sympathy and by how involved they were. You would think for their own sanity that they would have to be fairly detached, but we didn't get a sense of that at all. Overall, it made a very bad situation just a little bit better and we will always be very grateful for it.



Chicago's Children's Memorial was much the same experience (thankfully a more shorter and less scary stay for my daughter) for me. Not just top of the line professionals, but people truly devoted to their work on an emotional level.


----------



## Morkonan (Feb 8, 2013)

I had surgery "down there", once. It was to repair an injury - I got hit by a very heavy length of industrial chain, swinging at a good rate of speed. Bruce Lee couldn't have doubled me over as quickly as that did.

I had complications after the surgery. I had a "drain" installed that was due to be removed a week later. But, it was done improperly... Let's just say that, because things didn't drain properly, things expanded drastically. I had a huge hematoma and uncontrollable shivers accompanied by a raging fever and a nurse friend took me to the emergency room, 48 hrs after the surgery. The attending urologist cursed the name of my surgeon, up and down the hall and the nurses at the ER even knew he had a bad rep... It pays to do some research on your surgeon, before you're under the knife. (*Hematomas are often accompanied by all the signs of a major infection, but it's just the body's way of reacting to large clots of blood.)

But, everything worked out fine and one would never know that my nether regions swelled up the size of a small watermelon.... 

I'm happy things turned out well for you, Joe!


----------



## JosephB (Feb 8, 2013)

Morkonan said:


> I had surgery "down there", once. It was to  repair an injury - I got hit by a very heavy length of industrial chain,  swinging at a good rate of speed. Bruce Lee couldn't have doubled me  over as quickly as that did.
> 
> I had complications after the surgery. I had a "drain" installed that  was due to be removed a week later. But, it was done improperly... Let's  just say that, because things didn't drain properly, things expanded  drastically. I had a huge hematoma and uncontrollable shivers  accompanied by a raging fever and a nurse friend took me to the  emergency room, 48 hrs after the surgery. The attending urologist cursed  the name of my surgeon, up and down the hall and the nurses at the ER  even knew he had a bad rep... It pays to do some research on your  surgeon, before you're under the knife. (*Hematomas are often  accompanied by all the signs of a major infection, but it's just the  body's way of reacting to large clots of blood.)
> 
> ...



Oh dear. It hurts just to think about all that!

I'm getting incrementally better -- it's a lot slower than I thought or was led to believe. I went to work all day yesterday and that was a mistake -- it really set me back. Today I worked half a day at work, the rest I'm doing at home. Taking lots of ice breaks. We had a pretty cool outing planned tomorrow with friends and had to cancel that. Oh well -- I've got at least another weekend with no yard work or chores of any kind -- you have to look on the bright side. I might be able to milk another weekend out of it if I play my cards right.


----------



## Lewdog (Feb 8, 2013)

JosephB said:


> Oh dear. It hurts just to think about all that!
> 
> I'm getting incrementally better -- it's a lot slower than I thought or was led to believe. I went to work all day yesterday and that was a mistake -- it really set me back. Today I worked half a day at work, the rest I'm doing at home. Taking lots of ice breaks. We had a pretty cool outing planned tomorrow with friends and had to cancel that. Oh well -- I've got at least another weekend with no yard work or chores of any kind -- you have to look on the bright side. I might be able to milk another weekend out of it if I play my cards right.




Just don't go all in unless you get dealt pocket rockets (Two aces for the non-poker players out there).


:cookie:


----------

