# Scoring birth



## Olly Buckle

This is what I propose, as there are eleven poems and only ten choices on a poll I suggest each person starts their first post with the words 

I choose (person) :- (name of poem). No (no of post)

Put it separate across the top of your first post so I can find them easily and count up at the end. remember post are 1-12, there is no number one.

I have made my choice and added a couple of comments as an example below


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## Olly Buckle

I choose Foxee:- Blue star child. No 7

I like this best because it seems the most genuine and heartfelt, I find it very difficult to avoid a certain mechanical quality when writing to a subject, this does. There are other poems which are very technically adept, for me the simplicity appeals far more.

I had comments prepared on several of the other poems but I lost them in the copy and paste process, can't even do that right. I may come back when I see what other people have to say.


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## Galivanting

mirror - womb number 6

since it would be quite the faux pas to vote for myself, ill have to go for mirror... she writes this subject in her sleep, and it shows


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## Martin

SadLuckDame - "Mother" - #3

Many good entries. I chose this one, maybe because of my male handicap regarding birth experiences, but it's classical nature/birth theme really spoke to me, and the directness of the whole piece made it very authentic.

Lisa, regarding your poem, what a day... I imagine it a sad feeling, how one's parent never got to see one's child. I'm sure he would be fine just knowing, that little Chester made it that very day. Thanks for sharing.

And thanks all for this entertaining contest.

Martin


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## Baron

SadLuckDame - Mother - #3

I was torn between this one and the entry by iDrew which was, as always, witty and original. This one was my final choice because of the usual original style and strong narrative.

To some degree, I agree with Galivanting about Mirror's poem, that is it certainly made me yawn. Perhaps if she tries writing when she's awake she'll come up with something that isn't the same old...


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## SadLuckDame

Olly--#1

Was an easy decision for me, actually, even though such wonderful entries. Olly's piece to start out, set the tone, mood and zapped me there to that place. The father's view, was sublime.


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## bryndavis

My vote goes to iDrew's iBirth MisUnderstanding.

It made me laugh, as her poetry so often does, and in a topic that seemed quite heavy in many entries, I appreciated the relief.


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## Foxee

I choose *Chester's Daughter: Birth vs Death *   Post No. 5

This is a tough competition to judge...so many great poems. I liked Olly's for the father's-eye view and the warmth he gave it. I liked iDrew's poem because it was fun and different and her poetry's always great to read. 

But I had to go with Chester's Daughter on this one because of the depth of feeling. The poem communicated its theme well and without fuss...the poetry structure didn't obscure the story. While it was sad it was still hopeful and the poem played into the legend that when one soul dies another is born (This happened when my daughter was born, too, though it was not a close family member. Instead it was a girl who was murdered at a party.) so the poem had a bit of mysticism to it for me as well.

Great premise, nice job, liked the poem a lot.


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## Olly Buckle

Chester's daughter, birth versus death was high on my list initially. But then when I re-read I found myself thinking about the physician who gave a woman a sedative after she had given birth, presumably as a means of behavioural control. Not just that he made a quip about "I think not" and called her his "little dickie bird" I think it was. The man should be struck off for assault and demeaning a patient, it sounds amusing and it is necessary to make the plot work (Or some sort of delay is) but it annoyed me so much... grrrr.


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## Foxee

Okay, I can see that. It didn't diminish the poem for me. Moms who have just given birth normally aren't allowed to get up and just walk around right after, especially depending on how the birth went.

So I saw it as saving her from herself, really.


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## Olly Buckle

Mother by Sad luck Dame also came very close, I liked the personal touch of Sally with her luminous eyes, pony tail and support system. The pausing at the doors and grasping hands I felt I could see happening, the teenager finding the woman within herself. In fact it is difficult to say precisely why it did not come out on top, perhaps the electrical storm to the eclipse was just a bit too far, a string too many pulled. The world being what it is I shall probably discover that that part was taken from personal experience now


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## Martin

sigh.. I feel so silly my poor entry put a nice looking poll out of the question. Though I really think this contest thing is a lot of fun. Good job to you Olly.


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## SadLuckDame

I was going to wait till the voting was closed, but since you guys are discussing it I wanna too. I loved Olly's because he did the 'show' not tell so strongly, the words used 'nappies', 'forceps', ect. popped me right there in the labor room. It's not that I believe it should always be 'show' not 'tell' (I'm a fan of being a story teller) but I saw it work so well in his piece. Plus, the father's side as I said was sublime. Their faces when they see the 'goo', memorable.

I loved Foxee's sweet, lil, piece. Simple and soothing. Idrew was original, funny and I did like it except the last line, threw me off. Also the 'prison' guys was an interesting one. 

p.s. Olly, it sure was a big storm going in, and a real eclipse going out. LOL, plus he was born on Mama's day. I'm superstitious and believe in signs.

Thank you for the kind words Martin and Baron. I'm glad it worked for yas.


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## Olly Buckle

Just had to be when I had said that didn't it? I swear I am not superstitious, my ex wife ran off with someone else and I heard nothing of her until twelve years later I discovered she died on my daughter's third birthday.


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## Olly Buckle

Mirror, I did feel that was a slightly cruel comment of Baron's about waking up, but I do wonder if you have exploited your extremely competent style fairly fully. The poem is full of metaphor, allegory, double-entendre even, which you are very good at, but the subject is one so basic to the human condition that I felt it called for something more direct and personal. Foxee's poem may actually have benefited in my judgement for being adjacent to yours, the contrast is great.
 Personally I am hoping for something mundane for our next subject, a complete change from the Big themes.


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## Chesters Daughter

I choose Foxee's Blue Star Child - #7

I am of the opinion that giving birth was easier than casting a vote in this competition. I was torn between the pieces of Foxee, Olly, Sad Luck Dame, and Drew as all were equally appealing to me for different reasons. I can only echo what has already been said about each by others. All strong, well written pieces leading to one very tough decision. In the end, though, I had to choose Foxee as the simplicity and beauty of her piece really struck a chord with me. Job well done, my dear girl, I told you to stop agonizing with good reason.

Foxee - Thank you for your kind words regarding my piece. I am glad that it resonated with you. You were correct regarding complications. I never did get pregnancy quite right - four children - four sets of different and uncommon complications. 

Olly - I'm sorry I caused that grrrr. My doctor meant no disrespect by calling me little bird, it was the nickname he gave me because I am so petite in stature. He did me a favor by sedating me. I had been hospitalized and confined to bed rest because of extremely high blood pressure for almost a week before going into labor. He knew full well that once my son was safely delivered and no longer in need of my plumbing, I was going to get to my father's bedside no matter the risks to myself. Since I had been considered high risk throughout the pregnancy and had not yet stabilized, the odds that I would have had a stroke were extremely high. I commend him for his actions, he just may have saved me from disability or even death.

Martin - My sincere thanks, kind sir, for your very comforting sentiment.


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## exocoetidae

*Mirror's "Womb" (#6)*

I choose Mirror's "Womb" (#6).

Without elaborate commentary, I will add that all birth works had moving truths, and my decision was difficult.


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## Olly Buckle

This is going to be fun for the next round, ten votes were cast, four poems got a vote apiece, the other six votes were shared equally by Sad luck dame (3), Mirror(6),and Foxee (7). 
 I could ask them for a suggestion each and set up a poll for a few days, we might get another tie.
We could have a multiple choice competition for once.
What do you think? Any other suggestions? 
I shall leave this thread open for a while, but please don't post more votes for poems.


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## Foxee

LOL, Thanks, Olly, and thanks to anyone who voted for Blue Star Child! I concede the choosing the next prompt to the other two winners. I just enjoyed the contest.


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## Olly Buckle

As I would expect from you Foxee, except that I think the other two winners were also the last two winners, let's see if there are any other suggestions first. Personally I think a round of multiple choice might be fun.


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## SadLuckDame

Oh big congratulations to you ladies, Mirror and Foxee. Was an impressive batch of poetry from everyone. A competition of a topic sounds great, I'm in.  p.s. Olly, I've only been in one other competition, and lost miserable, lol.


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## Olly Buckle

Sorry SLD, now I think about it it was "From me with Squalor", I tend to make both you names acronyms in my head, a poor excuse.


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## Mirror

Congratulations S.L.D. and Foxee! Thank you to those who selected my poem. I'm sorry I didn't get to vote; I've been very busy. 

Olly, I truly appreciate your advice, and I know what you mean about the poem being too metaphorically diffuse but lacking emotional attachment. I will work on it. I really like your suggestion about writing something more mundane - certainly a challenge for me. 

Best to all.


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