# Counseling?



## MamaStrong (Jan 25, 2015)

Something that's been weighing on my mind the past couple of days. A lot of people have differing views on seeking counseling or suggesting counseling.
How do you feel about it?
** Keep in mind. Counseling isn't just going to a shrink, laying on a couch and pouring out your woes while said shrink gets a nap in and then prescribes you medication. There are many different "types" of counselors out there. So share an educated view on your point. Interested to see what everyone says.** (Please keep this friendly).


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## escorial (Jan 25, 2015)

the best councillor is yourself...speaking from experience some of the strange,odd,weird things i done led me to believe only i could change me and my journey to get through it was part of me as much as my future


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## dale (Jan 25, 2015)

i don't trust "councilors". they read a few books, get a degree, and think they have the answers to problems in MY mind? 
ha ha. i find that pretty damn humorous.


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## MamaStrong (Jan 25, 2015)

I can see that. In my opinion, a counselor is there as a sounding board. Like I mentioned before, there are different types. Those who prescribe medication and those who don't. When I was growing up and dealing with my parents divorce, we used to have a counselor play board games with us. That's all we did the entire hour. Got nothing from it. However, later in life, after having my first child, I faced PPD. It was then I decided that other than writing, my calling was to become a counselor. Someone who is there and guides the session, but doesn't offer any life directions. I find myself that when simply just talking out a problem, I can figure out what needs to be done myself. Having a counselor hear me work out the problem and use their resources to help me get to the solution I came up with on my own, is what I consider a real counselor.



ETA: I'm also a firm believer that it's not a position that should be paid $50/hr lol. Outrageous.


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## GenkiWorld (Jan 25, 2015)

The best counselor is ourselves, but at times we need an outsider view, someone who knows us best, who knows how to listen without holding judgment and someone who understands us. While in many situations we can be our best counsel, in other times we become our worse enemies, los in ourselves and that is the time when an exterior counsel should come in to play.


                At times that person can be a family member, our significant other, or even a best friend. But what makes their counseling worth it is the fact they will be there to listen, they will allow us to speak without holding us accountable for things, wrongfully judging us, or making decisions for us. They should be sounding boards and the ones to set us in our ways without taking the decision making, or life fixing in to their hands. At least that is my view on counseling.


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## dither (Jan 25, 2015)

Much depends on the councellee, oh dear, is there such a word?

I think that if i was being counselled, it's like, i hate being paid compliments. I mean, it's all phoney isn't it? They don't really mean it. Do they? They're just saying that, aren't they? They think it's what i want to hear.
The barricade is well and truly up.

Sorry, but that's me i'm afraid.


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## dale (Jan 25, 2015)

MamaStrong said:


> I can see that. In my opinion, a counselor is there as a sounding board. Like I mentioned before, there are different types. Those who prescribe medication and those who don't. When I was growing up and dealing with my parents divorce, we used to have a counselor play board games with us. That's all we did the entire hour. Got nothing from it. However, later in life, after having my first child, I faced PPD. It was then I decided that other than writing, my calling was to become a counselor. Someone who is there and guides the session, but doesn't offer any life directions. I find myself that when simply just talking out a problem, I can figure out what needs to be done myself. Having a counselor hear me work out the problem and use their resources to help me get to the solution I came up with on my own, is what I consider a real counselor.
> 
> 
> 
> ETA: I'm also a firm believer that it's not a position that should be paid $50/hr lol. Outrageous.



i'm sure they do help some people. depends on the person, i suppose. they never helped me. i was placed in a teen
psyche ward when i was 15. it was fairly short term. most kids got out in 6-8 weeks. on my 10th week, they finally
called my parents to come get me out of there because they couldn't do anything with me. my parents were fuming
mad about it, because it costs quite a bit of money. but i was actually quite proud that i was the 1st kid to ever be
kicked out of the place.


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## OddEvy (Jan 25, 2015)

MamaStrong said:


> In my opinion, a counselor is there as a sounding board.
> 
> Someone who is there and guides the session, but doesn't offer any life directions. I find myself that when simply just talking out a problem, I can figure out what needs to be done myself. Having a counselor hear me work out the problem and use their resources to help me get to the solution I came up with on my own, is what I consider a real counselor.


My thoughts on it too. When I was a teen I was made to see a series of counselors, none of which helped. They would basically change every six months and it was only a session a month. So not much ever got done, then the new one would start over from scratch. The most annoying and insulting thing however is that it always seemed like they assumed I was lying. They'd ask a question, I would answer truthfully, then they'd ask the same question again and again in different ways as though I would somehow "slip" and answer differently. Urgh. So I had a pretty poor opinion of councellors, therapists and so on for a number of years.

I late decided, for my own sake, I needed to see one. She was a humanistic therapist, basically there just to listen to me and guide the flow of the sessions to help me focus on areas she thought I needed to. It was all my own talking, reflecting and thinking however that really led to any change - as it should be, imo. She also helped me a lot just by being someone I could talk to, as up until that point I had been essentially mute for a fair number of years. Fast forward three years of that and I left to pursue the things I needed to pursue. Now I'm with another therapist, one year next month I believe, who similiarly takes a much more humanistic approach now. In the beginning she didn't but very quickly realized trying to get me to do things was the wrong way to go about it. So now she, like my last, acts as a sounding board so I can talk to myself (which is what you do in therapy, you don't talk to the therapist really). 

So overall I have a very positive opinion of therapy. However you must find a therapist you work well with, and one whose approach meshes with you. Some people would be fine with a therapist essentially acting as a life coach, others wouldn't. Its all down to both the person and the therapist involved. For those given to introspection and analyzing themselves I strongly feel like the humanistic approach is really worthwhile.


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## shadowwalker (Jan 25, 2015)

It greatly depends on the counselor and the type of counseling. For persons with mental illnesses, psychologists (coupled with medications) have proven to have the most successful outcomes. I would have been dead without that combination. Now, "life coaches" - bleh. JMO, of course. Most people get out of counseling what they're willing or able to put into it, and they must accept that it's going to take time and effort.


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## Blade (Jan 25, 2015)

Generally I would have to go with escorial and dale on this. The only person you can really trust to change yourself or your life situation is yourself. On the other hand.....



OddEvy said:


> In the beginning she didn't but very quickly realized trying to get me to do things was the wrong way to go about it. So now she, like my last, acts as a sounding board so I can talk to myself (which is what you do in therapy, you don't talk to the therapist really).
> 
> So overall I have a very positive opinion of therapy. However you must find a therapist you work well with, and one whose approach meshes with you. Some people would be fine with a therapist essentially acting as a life coach, others wouldn't. Its all down to both the person and the therapist involved. For those given to introspection and analyzing themselves I strongly feel like the humanistic approach is really worthwhile.





shadowwalker said:


> It greatly depends on the counselor and the type of counseling. For persons with mental illnesses, psychologists (coupled with medications) have proven to have the most successful outcomes. I would have been dead without that combination. Now, "life coaches" - bleh. JMO, of course. Most people get out of counseling what they're willing or able to put into it, and they must accept that it's going to take time and effort.



A case of situations and the singer not the song. For me writing is an excellent outlet for 'talking to oneself' and I could not imagine the hassle of talking to a counsellor at this point in time.:blue:


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## PiP (Jan 25, 2015)

When I was being bullied at work I went to see a life coach. She listened, asked questions and never offered her opinion. The way forward and plan of action was my decision and mine alone. She helped me make those important decisions by listening, supplying me with tissues to wipe away my tears, and cups of tea because we Brits always seem to drink tea in times of stress. Offloading the burden I had been carrying silently and alone was a tremendous help. When I tried to talk to my doctor about the situation his solution was to prescribe anti-depressants. Yeah.. right. That was a great solution, not :cookie: Anti-depressants would only treat the symptoms and not the cause. 

Mamastrong, I really think it depends on _why_ you feel you need a Councillor and the type of person you are. My tears were tears of frustration not tears of self-pity. Helplessness, yes. I knew I had to do something, but at the same time I felt like a frightened rabbit trapped in the glare of the headlights of an oncoming car.

Talking to a stranger might help but at the end of the day the only person who can help you, is yourself.


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## Boofy (Jan 25, 2015)

I had meningitis C strain when I was seven (The nasty blood poisoning one). I uh, nearly died. I started to hallucinate and the doctors told my parents I had an hour to live and all sorts of other traumatic things. Anyway, long story short, I remembered the entire thing. I started having night terrors about the hallucinations I'd experienced whilst on the brink. I also started sleep walking. I went to a children's Psychologist for a number of years to try and learn to cope with it. It had no effect, unfortunately. Some people are incredibly receptive to things like CBT and such. It just depends on who's seeing the psych, I think. 

I still do wacky things in my sleep now. Once I blew up a sugar pot, apparently. Just went in the kitchen, turned the oven on, put the sugar pot on the hob and went back to bed. I woke up a few minutes later to a sticky caramel and ceramic covered kitchen. I also have those nightmares about three times a week, right now. 

It also depends on the actual psych too. Personally, having read a lot of Jon Ronsons writing on the DSM:V, I am inclined to be sceptical of their expertise. Maybe that is what prevents my being receptive, though I doubt I was as much of a cynic when I was seven ^^


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## Deafmute (Jan 25, 2015)

hmm, well this is a topic I would have to say I feel rather strongly about. I have worked in psychology for about the last decade between getting my B.S. in psychology to going to study medical fields and working on  a psych ward as I go through school. I have heard several opinions that I feel misrepresent what the job of a counsel is. It has been said that the best counselor is yourself and while that certainly is true in a certain regard its a dangerous thing to say to someone who doesn't really understand. The human brain is an organ, as such this organ is susceptible to a variety of ailments.   Now these issues are not always issues that person can see in themselves. You can't always tell when your mind is stuck in a negative loop, or putting a negative connotation on everything you see. 

This is where counselors come in. They work with patients to help them see past the blocks that you can't see on your own. Asking someone to fix themselves is like asking someone to do their own dental procedure, is it possible? sure. would it require a decent bit of study on the subject and ultimately be harder than having someone else help you, definitely. That may be a bit of clumsy comparison but its in the right direction i hope. The counselor helps you by giving you the tools you need to help yourself. They should not be telling you what to do they give you tools to use when you start getting stuck in cognitive traps. They teach you examine your thoughts and act as a sounding board for you to clear up your internal thoughts. They are useful, not only that but I would suggest they are woefully underutilized. 

All that said counselling is a painfully under trained field. Its way to easy to go and spend a few dollars and get a certificate that allows you to practice. If you are going to seek help from one, find the right one. Find one that is specifically trained in the area you are struggling with, find one that meshes with your personality and that you can be comfortable with because if you are not able to build a relationship with this person you can't possible hope to get any help. This may mean shopping around and going to a few before you find one that actually helps. But if you feel like you are overwhelmed, depressed, anxious, out of control, failing. etc... don't listen to people who say you should do it on your own. whether its friends and family or a professional get help. (friends and family can be a great resources but keep in mind that they don't always know what they are talking about where as a good professional should)

That's my two cents hope it helps.


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## Mistique (Jan 25, 2015)

I guess I have experience with counseling in more than one way. I have a degree in psychology and social work. I have worked as a counselor myself during my intership as a psychologist, but I have also counseled quite a few families as a child protection social worker.

I have also had counseling myself in quite an intense way. It was about ten years ago and I have been in two inpatient programs that each lasted three months. The first one wasn't a good match for me and I left that program far more unstable than I entered it. They triggered a great deal of emotions in me, but gave me very little tools to deal with them. It was a bad match and I knew that from the start and I should have been more assertive about it, but I wasn't in the kind of state of mind where I could do that. I entered the second program a few months after the first and that one was utterly amazing. I had to work so incredibly hard - and I did - but it changed so much in my life. It helped me confront my past - my childhood mostly - and it helped me regain control over my life. I left that program with a much stronger sense of who I am and an ability to feel my emotions without getting overwhelmed by them. I still use the skills I learned there today. It was like a gift to myself. So I guess my message would be: don't hesitated about getting help, but make sure you get the right one.


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## Deafmute (Jan 25, 2015)

I didnt know you had a degree in psychology Mist. The things you learn about people lol.


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## dale (Jan 25, 2015)

kind of off topic, but i love and abhor the psychological impact of what the movie "antichrist" with willem dafoe does, in terms of its
portrayal of "modern psychiatry". it messes with my head. lol


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## Mistique (Jan 25, 2015)

Deafmute said:


> I didnt know you had a degree in psychology Mist. The things you learn about people lol.



Yeah, I do  I have a bachelor in social work and a master degree in psychology (I struggle a bit with the terms, since English is not my first language, but I think this is it). I never mention the master degree these days as I never worked in that field (other than the internship), but went on to work as a social worker instead.


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## shadowwalker (Jan 25, 2015)

Re: doing it on your own - yes, there are times when a good friend will do as much good as a counselor. You need a shoulder to cry on and then you pick yourself up and move on. HOWEVER - when dealing with a mental illness, "doing it on your own" is just the old "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" mindset which has caused a great deal of unnecessary pain and death over the years. A mental illness is not a choice, not a lack of backbone, not something you ignore. It is an _illness_. I mean, would you tell someone with cancer to heal themselves?


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## dither (Jan 25, 2015)

PiP said:


> I knew I had to do something, but at the same time I felt like a frightened rabbit trapped in the glare of the headlights of an oncoming car.



Maybe i'm just a whinging old fart. I feel able to relate to that,sort of, but at the same time i feel so synical towards counselling.


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## Plasticweld (Jan 25, 2015)

As someone who is a faith based counselor I have worked with everyone, from those dealing with depression, marital issues, to anxiety.  I have recently done a number of visits with a Mennonite who is thinking of leaving the church and his wife who wants to stay.   I also am a business mentor which many times deals with the anxiety and problems that come up with dealing with the stress of long hours and plus the normal employee headaches 


I have no degrees, not even sure how I ever got started in this.  As a leader of a Christian group at one time I was often called on when problems arise.  I don't get paid for what I do, there is no stigma to speaking with me, I am just a friend who might help you see things with a little more clarity.   I tell everyone, I will tell them what they already know deep down, they may have either not recognized it or just not dealt with it or had the ability to verbalize it.  It is something that over the years, has becomes being someone who has a better view of the road map to know where someone is headed and what things tend to lead to.   I don't seek people out, they seem to find me and call with a simple introduction that consists no more of, so and so said that I should talk to you. 


I use the Bible, I use common sense. My ability to show compassion and understanding towards someone else are my only credentials.   Not sure if it qualifies me for anything, but I am free to talk to and there is no shortage of people that just need a friend to talk to.


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## dale (Jan 25, 2015)

i think 90% of the time, i'd make a very good counselor. but then the other 10%, i'd be telling people to fill their pockets
with stones and jump off a bridge. so that's why i don't go into counseling.


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## Olly Buckle (Jan 25, 2015)

To my mind the two types of counsellor are the person who tells a person what they think they should do, generally ineffective, and those who give the person criteria and systems for making their own decisions, much more effective. 

In simplistic terms, if one is told what to do by one who believes they understand what is necessary, they may be right or wrong, and the advice may be interpreted correctly or incorrectly. Even if it is good advice and the recipient understands and employs it correctly it is a one off, applicable to that situation.

On the other hand if one is taught a means of solving it for oneself the solution is likely to be a fit for the person seeking it and is not open to misinterpretation, they also have the means to cope with future problems of a similar nature.

This is simplistic, the individual may not be receptive to overt education for example, but basically it is one's own solutions that work, not those imposed on you and  good counsellor will provide you with the means to create solutions to problems rather than telling you what to do; I can imagine that playing board games might be a way of doing this in some situations, not to say that it was the case in the particular instance cited, but games are controlled imitations of life.


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## Gargh (Jan 25, 2015)

I've had both 'free' (NHS) counselling and independent private counselling. The NHS provision was awful. It was completely unsuited to my needs and only one type of 'talking therapy' was offered as a cure-all... and it was that or meds which were just as bad an option, for me. I had to look elsewhere and the private counselling I've had I was lucky enough to access through a charity, otherwise I never could have afforded it, and it's made a world of difference to me. They went to great pains to match me not only with the right type of therapy, but also with the right person. They also guarantee an appointment once a week every week for up to two years. It's a really thorough, client-centred approach and I have the reassurance of knowing every counsellor is independently vetted, a member of the national standards council and that they also have their own anonymous supervision process. I love how reassuring all that is and it creates a very positive and trusting environment that goes beyond having a helpful ear and becomes a solid support system. 

I used to think counselling was just a substitute for good friends, now I am certain it's more complex and vital than that when executed with both knowledge _and _experience.


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## aj47 (Jan 25, 2015)

A counselor is a rent-a-friend who cannot violate your trust unless you make a credible threat.

That may or may not be what you need.


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## popsprocket (Jan 26, 2015)

Meh, talking works for some people, and not for others. I'm too arrogant to think that anyone else could help with my problems (which are minimal in the first place).

If you think that counselling might help you then give it a go. I would never let anyone force you to do it. It'd be a waste of money if that were the case.


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## Ariel (Jan 26, 2015)

I think having a person outside of the situation who is neutral can help depending on the circumstances.  Grief and marriage counseling come immediately to mind.  I spent a year in grief counseling after my brother died.  It helped me to learn how to handle grief.


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## MamaStrong (Jan 26, 2015)

I apologize if it came across as if I were searching for counseling and looking into it. I actually plan to get my Master's in Community Counseling as soon as I pay off my student loans from getting my B.A. . I was asking because it seems my sister and I have differing opinions. 

Backstory: My baby sister, 15 years old, ran away the other night. She was found but my step dad was LIVID, and imagine The Hulk, yeah. In April of last year, our mother was diagnosed with Stage 4 Cancer. It was sudden, very unexpected. She died a month and 17 days later, in May. My little sister was adopted by my birth mom and her biological mother was a niece of my step dad. My little sister's birth mother was found about 5 years ago in an abandoned house, murdered. 

Point being, I was telling our other sister (she's 30), that I believed our little sister needed counseling because while for most people this would just be a teenager acting out, this isn't the case. I firmly believe my little sister is grieving, as well as my step dad, and feel they should talk to someone who can not give them direction on how to live their life, but just to be able to talk it out. Not a family member though. 

That's where this question came from.  My sister's response is my little sister needs her a** beat.


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## Ariel (Jan 26, 2015)

No, she's obviously dealing with grief not just for her adoptive mother but for her biological.  The human psyche is a strange and twisty place.


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## NineShadowEyes (Jan 27, 2015)

Having Borderline Personality Disorder and, for most of my life, being clinically depressed and suicidal, I've done a ton of counseling, one on one and group therapy. I've learned interesting life skills, gotten to know other people with similar problems and learned from their experiences, and sometimes made surprising discoveries about myself. All in all, though, therapy didn't help with my underlying problems and depression very much. What did it for me was TMS treatment and a cocktail of drugs that took five years to arrive at. I don't go to therapy at all anymore.


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## Morkonan (Jan 27, 2015)

MamaStrong said:


> .... So share an educated view on your point. Interested to see what everyone says.** (Please keep this friendly).



If someone has a problem with their foot, they go to a podiatrist. If they have a problem with their eyes, they go to a optometrist or ophthalmologist. If someone has some emotional or psychological problems, they should go to a counselor/therapist or psychiatrist. To me, it's really that simple. There should be no stigma or self-condemnation attached for anyone who is seeking help with something like that.

In the larger sense, psychological problems and mental illnesses are virtually discussion "taboos" today. Nobody wants to talk about them and nobody seems to want to do much about them. As a result, cities are filled with homeless people, who are often self-medicating on dangerous substances, and children become criminals when people fail to admit that they recognize signs of emotional or psychological problems. Our own health systems shuttle such patients off to what are usually the worst staffed, lowest funded, facilities, and are generally only interested in "containment" and not the "rehabilitation" of or "curing" of individuals.


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## Poet of Gore (Feb 2, 2015)

if you are crazy i think counseling is a great idea.


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## am_hammy (Feb 2, 2015)

This is such a tough topic. I had to go through counseling in college for certain reasons as to not get kicked out. I went to a Christian institution so I will let you all gather what you will from that and decide what it was. Regardless of their reasoning for me having to do it or if it was just a bunch of bull, it was a bit forced. I too don't like being coddled. I told her straight up that I didn't want sugar-coated BS and just to get done what we needed to get done. 

I think it helped me be somewhat okay with the type of situation that lets someone just listen to you and try and coax whatever it is they need to get out in order for the session to be worth something. I don't like when they force things though. If I don't want to talk about something, then I don't. That's the hard part about the counseling. Essentially you want to be comfortable when you're baring your soul but it seems that the concept is to push through the discomfort of being in an unfamiliar place with an overall unfamiliar face staring back at you and writing things down in hopes of determining the cause of your anguish and what exercises should be used to help you through it.

Sometimes it's great to have someone you know you don't necessarily have to connect with and really won't say too much back to you, but also part of baring it all is to do it with someone that turns around and does just the same so I feel the idea of counseling is cold in that way.

I also know that not ever person you find that offers this kind of help has that "cold" feeling. The problem is that finding a decent human being who actually wants to legitimately help people and their problems and be utterly genuine in doing so is much harder to find I feel. Overall though, if you want help in that way (which I do believe it can help people) You gotta do your research, and pick the right place and person for you. Don't do it because anyone else thinks you should but because _*you*_ want it.


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## Kevin (Feb 2, 2015)

> I firmly believe my little sister is grieving, as well as my step dad, and feel they should talk to someone who can not give them direction on how to live their life, but just to be able to talk it out


 sounds like she/they could benefit from counseling. Perspective is what you get from it, and someone pointing out to you your patterns. Sometimes it takes a third party, someone not connected, to show you what it is your doing and why. Denial is how someone resists. If someone is a good liar, can convince themselves, then it won't work.


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## shadowwalker (Feb 3, 2015)

Poet of Gore said:


> if you are crazy i think counseling is a great idea.



Crazy is a very derogatory term to use if you were trying to make a serious comment. If you were trying to be humerous, it failed.


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## Carly Berg (Feb 3, 2015)

I think going to counseling _is _helping yourself. If someone is stuck in a bad emotional place for whatever reason and hasn't been able to pull out of it themselves in a reasonable amount of time, well then, why not? Seems like there's a lot to possibly gain and not much to lose there.


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## Bruno Spatola (Feb 3, 2015)

Some think they lose some of their dignity by opening themselves up to a stranger. It can be hard at first to see where counseling will get you in future terms, because it often feels dehumanizing when you're doing it. Not at the fault of the counselors, or themselves, but the niggling feeling they weren't able to deal with the issue on their own, like they always have done before, and always expected to keep on doing. I understand the fear of putting all your problems on the table in someone else's house (so to speak), but you hear so many stories of people giving it a chance -- even after a bad opening session -- and ending up in a much better place because of it.

In short: I get it, why so many feel reluctant or scared to talk it out with others, especially doctors, but if you seriously want to try and return to a balanced state, or an improved state, then there's no reason not to give it a go. I'd strongly encourage it, from personal experience.


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## Bishop (Feb 3, 2015)

Being the son of one counselor, the husband to a teacher in the process of becoming a counselor, and a huge fan of Counselor Deanna Troi on Star Trek the Next Generation, I'm biased in favor of the counselor-ing. I've seen it help many people, including myself (Deanna was so kind to me :3 ) and I think there's no shame in admitting you need a little help now and then. But it does depend on how truthful you're willing to be with the person listening and with yourself.


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## dither (Feb 3, 2015)

Bishop said:


> Being the son of one counselor, the husband to a teacher in the process of becoming a counselor, and a huge fan of Counselor Deanna Troi on Star Trek the Next Generation, I'm biased in favor of the counselor-ing. I've seen it help many people, including myself (Deanna was so kind to me :3 ) and I think there's no shame in admitting you need a little help now and then. But it does depend on how truthful you're willing to be with the person listening and with yourself.



Bishop,
i reckon we could all use a little help occasionally.
Some more so than others.
But without truthfulness there ain't/wouldn't be much point.


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## Poet of Gore (Feb 4, 2015)

shadowwalker said:


> Crazy is a very derogatory term to use if you were trying to make a serious comment. If you were trying to be humerous, it failed.



is crazy really a derogatory term? would insane be better? how about if i put the word crazy in between two pieces of sourdough bread? will it be easy to digest. 

we can replace crazy with whatever word you want, it is the condition and not the term that matter.

but i went to counseling for a time because i was crazy. normal most of the time, but i did crazy stuff when i got angry. so if i was a bit crazy and can admit it and not be butthurt over it, not sure why no one else can.

kind of weird that we all write or want to but are so scared of words for some reason.


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## shadowwalker (Feb 5, 2015)

Poet of Gore said:


> is crazy really a derogatory term? would insane be better? how about if i put the word crazy in between two pieces of sourdough bread? will it be easy to digest.
> 
> we can replace crazy with whatever word you want, it is the condition and not the term that matter.
> 
> ...



"Crazy" and "insane" are words used by people who have no understanding of the true nature of mental illnesses, who treat the illnesses and those with them as jokes. I might add that behavioral problems do not necessarily mean one has a mental illness. Just because you don't get "butthurt" over a derogatory term doesn't make it okay to use it. 

No one's scared of words - but treating others with respect is generally the better way to act.


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## TIG (Feb 5, 2015)

When it comes to counselling, the best approach (IMO) is to look at the bottom of a vodka bottle (life changing issues) or a beer bottle (day-to-day inanities). Despite what people tell you, the answer often really is there.


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## Terry D (Feb 5, 2015)

Poet of Gore said:


> kind of weird that we all write or want to but are so scared of words for some reason.



It's _because_ we are writers, or want to be, that we should have a higher respect for the words we use, and their power. Certain words carry significant implications when used in particular discussions. As writers we should all understand how our words will be received by our readers, it's part of the job.


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## Loveabull (Feb 5, 2015)

shadowwalker said:


> "Crazy" and "insane" are words used by people who have no understanding of the true nature of mental illnesses, who treat the illnesses and those with them as jokes. I might add that behavioral problems do not necessarily mean one has a mental illness. Just because you don't get "butthurt" over a derogatory term doesn't make it okay to use it.
> 
> No one's scared of words - but treating others with respect is generally the better way to act.



I toadly agree and besides crazy is totally subjective. How many people can you think of in positions of responsibility that are bat crap nuts? That being said no one has the right to condemn anyone else for mental illness, needing hospitalization, needing medication. It isn't about " sanity" whatever the heck that is actually;-)...It's about a chemical imbalance, a physical ailment therefore.

The people who poke fun or condemn others are the ones who don't realize that ANYONE can fall over the edge given enough pressure. It can happen to anyone at all...nothing to be ashamed of.


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