# Mr Bodges is fat.



## Jeko (Oct 15, 2012)

I was wondering how to introduce the character of Mr Bodges, and I came up with this random paragraph-and-a-bit. Enjoy!


Mr Bodges wasn’t fat. He was _fat_, emphasis on the word _fat_, maybe throw in some capital letter and exclamation marks in there too. He was two seats on the bus, push the chair a good metre away from the desk so that he could squeeze his way onto it _fat. _He was don’t push him down a hill or he’ll level whatever he hits, punch him in the stomach and you’ll lose your hand _fat. _He was sumo-wrestler, human-boulder, makes footprints in the pavement, leave him at the all you can eat buffet and he’ll eat the table too, take a picture of him at his son’s wedding five years ago and it’ll still be printing today, let him fall in love and he’ll break it, put him on the scales and you’ll see his phone number, let him walk in front of the TV and you’ll miss three seasons of CSI Miami-

You get the picture. 

Though they can only draw the picture on four adjacent football fields.


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## MrsPilkington (Oct 17, 2012)

When Mr. Bodges goes to the beach, he's the only one who gets a tan, kinda fat, huh?


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## Olly Buckle (Oct 17, 2012)

> maybe throw *in* some capital letter and exclamation marks* in* there too.


 over in.

A corpulent and Kilo-metrically challenged individual huh? Was he of the type who is hung with rolls, chins and jowls, all heading downward under the influence of gravity, or the sort who is red, round and shiny, as though he has been pumped up to the maximum pressure possible before he bursts?

Good start to Mr Bodges, Cadence.


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## dolphinlee (Oct 25, 2012)

Cadence that was a joyous paragraph.


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## anonick (Nov 6, 2012)

Lovely. 'Sumo-wrestler', though, is obvious. I love how they're just slight exaggerations at the start and then it goes on and on and on. Like Mr. Bodges.


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## kitsunescholar (Nov 20, 2012)

I loved the line about the printer and his phone number.  I actually laughed out loud at that one.


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## WilliamWinters (Dec 16, 2012)

I am pretty much in love with that paragraph. It reminds me a lot of Laurie Andersons' 'Speak' novel. 

'Sumo-wrestler' and 'human boulder' can go though, we know you can do better than that.

This post cheered me up this morning, thanks.


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## farefar (Dec 16, 2012)

This paragraph seems to be pointing in a direction. I feel as though I want to hear more about Mr. Bodges, however at the same time I want to hear less. I honestly would love to hear the story of Mr. Bodges. Was he always fat? Does he realize he is fat but cares not to change that fact? Or does he enjoy being fat. The fact that I want to know more is me hoping you will tell us more about Mr. Bodges. Something for another day perhaps. Thanks for the paragraph I thoroughly enjoyed it.


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## WilliamWinters (Dec 16, 2012)

Mr Bodges wasn't fat, he was _fat_. You know how kids at a certain age just have to miss the cracks in the pavement? Well, Mr Bodges did that too. It was safer that way. I'm not joking, you could throw apple's at him and prove Newton right -and have a laugh at the same time. It's kind of sad actually. Mr Bodges must be aware of his vastness. He must know how it affects people around him. He must know it's actually very hard to hold open a pneumatic door to its fullest extent. He must notice that everything around him isn't designed for a four-hundred pound man -desks, showers, microwave meals. I'm actually pretty sure he cry's on his pizza. Mr Bodges is fat.


Oh, I got carried away, and then went to a dark place.


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## Jeko (Dec 19, 2012)

Thanks for all the feedback on this, everyone.

Mr Bodges is a character in my fantasy/horror novel I'm working on. I was originally going to use this paragraph to introduce Mr Bodges, but now I'm considering using parts of it and embedding them in the narrative.

I need to express how fat Mr Bodges is because later in the book, he'll become a zombie and be ludicrously, grotesquely fat. I got the idea from a piece of artwork in the Welcome Trust building - it was this massive sculpture of a giant blob of fat with stubby, tiny legs. Supposed to symbolise how emotions engulf us or something.


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## o negative (Jan 12, 2013)

I have the feeling it would not be a good idea to introduce your character this way. It s funny, no doubt, but the writing looks fat, as well. Maybe if you dissolve this along your story, it would work. Otherwise, that is clearly too much at one time. Plus, it sounds like a compilation of jokes gathered around. It s not efficient, to me, to emphasize on one physical aspect only, when it comes to introduce a character.


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## mblank (May 8, 2013)

Your opening was funny, but like Mr. Bodges, a bit thick.  Embedding the sentences into a greater narrative sounds like a good idea.  The descriptions are quite clever.  Another critique I'd like to offer is that the run on sentences got a little confusing for me in places.  Thanks for the read!


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## Ninja (Jun 9, 2013)

That was very funny indeed.


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## summergenevieve (Jun 10, 2013)

You have my kind of humour. Very very funny piece but not sure if it would be a character description to fit into an adult fantasy/horror story, if it was aimed at young adults then maybe because they would find all of it amusing. Hope this helps.


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## JCWells (Jul 7, 2013)

Sounds like this guy ate mayonnaise and bread for a living.


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