# p.i.t.a.



## moderan (May 24, 2013)

It's been an interesting couple of weeks, to say the least.
The results of my last physical have determined that I need to have surgery to repair an epigastric hernia (one that originates above the umbilicus). This malady has become "incarcerated"-the loops of intestine have been walled off from the rest of the organ, and they've been causing some problems. Namely, constipation and some digestive issues.
The surgery hasn't been scheduled yet as I need to consult with my pulmonologist first-since I'm on oxygen, I'll have to go on the ventilator and be in a medically-induced coma, rather than receive traditional anaesthesia. He has to sign off on the document that attests to my suitability for the procedure.
Really not a big deal. I'm a little fearful of the coma and vent notion, but not unnecessarily so.
The problem is that a lot of my projects will have to be put aside for the operation and convalescence. I'm already creatively stultified to a large degree...a little bit of depression set in after realizing that I'd have to delay the publication of my book until "after"-especially as I haven't yet received the proof copies I ordered a month ago. That may be a post office issue. My mailbox got broken into a couple weeks ago, and I've ordered a new set to be delivered to a PO Box that I maintain for one of my pseudonyms.
Everything has ground to a halt except for the secret special project I've undertaken for WF-that's on schedule for the first week of June, after which I will see my pulmonologist and get things finalized.
I can't wait. The partial blockage and resultant difficulties are uncomfortable to say the least, and the hernia has become painful. My cats love to jump on my stomach to say hello. Ouch. I've gained about 20 pounds of bloat and look like a hairy water balloon with legs.
Hopefully the floodgates will open once I've been stitched back together.
It's really no joke. One of my rabbits died of similar conditions. Sepsis is a possibility, and the ugly specter of ARDS rears its head again when that's considered.
If anyone has been wondering where I've been, there you go. I've been on the throne, grunting and straining.


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## Ariel (May 24, 2013)

Mod, I hope that your procedures go well and that we'll have you back soon.  I hope you heal well.  Just so you know, we miss you, you cantankerous old bat.


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## Pluralized (May 24, 2013)

Man. Sorry to hear that, Mod. Good luck with the surgery, and with getting back to health. 

We need you in top form 'round here!


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## JosephB (May 24, 2013)

Yeah -- you are missed. The "Let's Eat" thread isn't the same without you. I hope your recovery goes well, buddy. (Last line -- definitely TMI.)


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## Sam (May 24, 2013)

Hope everything goes well, Mod. Your presence has been sorely missed.


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## PiP (May 24, 2013)

Hi Mod

I love, despite all your health problems, your positive attitude  It pales my aches and pains into insignificance by comparison!

May your op go well and recovery swift!

PiP


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## Kevin (May 24, 2013)

Yes, I wondered.  Good that they have a diagnosis and a plan.  *sigh* What to do but ride it out. No choice, really.


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## Gargh (May 24, 2013)

Yikes! Good to have an end in sight though. Hope all goes well for you.


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## J Anfinson (May 24, 2013)

Here's to your speedy recovery :champagne:

You can have some as soon as your doctor says it's okay.


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## Angelicpersona (May 24, 2013)

Good luck with everything, Mod!


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## squidtender (May 24, 2013)

Wow, D . . . I'm sorry, brother. You know if you need any help, my limited skills are at your disposal.


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## Cran (May 24, 2013)

All strength to you, mod, to get through this and recover. 

The rest is secondary, and will happen as and when.


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## jayelle_cochran (May 25, 2013)

*big big hugs*  I'm sorry you're going through all of that.  Hopefully surgery and recovery go well.  If you need someone to vent to, talk to, or whatever then just send me a message.  I'm here for ya luv.

*hugs again*
Jayelle


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## moderan (May 25, 2013)

Thank you all. I'll get through it. There are plenty of folks who are worse off.


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## Bilston Blue (May 25, 2013)

Good luck with your op, Mod. Hope everything goes well for you.


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## moderan (May 29, 2013)

Thank you, Scott. This getting old stuff is for the birds.


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## Morkonan (Jun 2, 2013)

moderan said:


> ... This getting old stuff is for the birds.



It beats the alternative.


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## Cran (Jun 3, 2013)

Morkonan said:


> It beats the alternative.


 Perpetual Youth?


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## moderan (Jun 3, 2013)

I think he means the big sleep, the dirt nap. I could do with the youth without the raging hormones thing.


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## Leyline (Jun 3, 2013)

Hey bro --

Sorry to hear about the troubles and hope things are improving and will continue to do so until you find yourself a herald of Galactus, without all the Cosmic Emo. 

BTW, visiting my PM's, I see that my message that I received both books was never sent. Well, here's me saying I received 'em, thanking you, and letting you know I'm tucked in about a quarter of the way through _Medea_ and loving it. The entire thing was worth it for Sturgeon and Herbert getting snippy with each other in the transcript section. 

Plus, I'll have cash this Wednesday, and will have the Wolfe, Gerrold and Malzberg sent out by the end of the week.


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## moderan (Jun 4, 2013)

No hurries, no worries. Glad that you're enjoying them. I'll be ok in the end. Medea is undeservedly forgotten, like so many of the good things.


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## Terry D (Jun 4, 2013)

Good luck, mod. And I fully agree about the getting old stuff.


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## moderan (Jun 12, 2013)

update: Next Friday I find out when the surgery will be scheduled. After the procedure, two months' convalescence. Limited sitting up for the first month...won't be here much and all projects are suspended until after that.
Today, the last of the pulmonary function tests.
My surgeon is a relative by marriage to former Green Bay/Minnesota quarterback Brett Favre. When I met her the other day, I was wearing a bright orange Bears cap. Fortunately, she's a Cardinal fan. Coulda been ugly.
I'll have plenty of reading time.


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## JosephB (Jun 12, 2013)

Wow, that's a long time, buddy. Sorry you have to go through that. Thanks for the update -- and keep us posted. Take care.


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## moderan (Jun 12, 2013)

Thanks Joe. Hernia surgery is basic but involves muscle tissue, so it takes time to knit. I hope my wife hasn't forgotten how to cook.
Today is the 11th anniversary of the day we met.


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## JosephB (Jun 12, 2013)

Hey -- that's pretty great. That's just about how long my wife and I have been together. We got married pretty soon after we met -- under a little pressure, if you know what I mean. Of course it wasn't for long, but last time I was down for the count people brought us food, since they knew I do most of the cooking. That was pretty nice. And my wife tries, but there wouldn't be much to forget...


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## Gumby (Jun 12, 2013)

Wishing you the best outcome, mod, and an uneventful recovery. The place isn't the same without you.


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## Sam (Jun 12, 2013)

I hope it isn't too long of a wait, Mod. That can be harder than convalescing. Wishing you all the best for it, and hope to see you back here soon. The place definitely isn't the same without you.


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## Mr mitchell (Jun 12, 2013)

I hope you get better soon, Mod.


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## bazz cargo (Jun 12, 2013)

Batting for ya Dude. 

Re Cooking. I do my own in self defence.

See ya on the other side of wellness.


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## moderan (Jun 20, 2013)

Oh, it just gets better. Today I found out that my step-daughter wants to give up custody of her eight-year-old daughter, who will come to live with us. Really no surprise since she's lost two other children due to her complete inability to function as a human being for extended periods. The great fun part is that this is gonna happen next effing weekend.
I tell myself it's for the best, and try to keep in mind the child's welfare and all that, but I'm really resentful of the whole situation and am gnawing my armpits in frustration. It's going to be really hard to keep from strangling both stepdaughter and her paramour (the child's father, who she's back with, another long and sad story) with their own entrails and then urinating on them.
On the plus side, the child will have no choice but to learn her letters and won't ever have to watch Twilight again. I can certainly use another pair of hands. I like the kid.
It's not her fault that her parents are exhibits at a combination proctologist/spelunker convention.
Friday I find out when my surgery will be. Maybe I can arrange it for next weekend :subdued:


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## Gargh (Jun 20, 2013)

^^ She's lucky to have someone who'll take responsibility for her well being  Good luck with... everything!


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## patskywriter (Jun 20, 2013)

Hopefully, the kid's antics will amuse you and distract you from any pain you might have. At least I hope she'll have antics. In any case, I hope that the two of you will have mutual thoughts of helping the other get through a tough time.


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## Pluralized (Jun 20, 2013)

Gawd, I feel for you man. 

Looking at the bright side, the kid will benefit from your wisdom. I wish you luck with surgery and the whole situation.


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## JosephB (Jun 20, 2013)

That's a drag mod. We have friends going through the same thing -- their daughter, who was also friend of mine growing up, and seemed like she had the world by the tail, got into drugs and a lot of trouble. She was given multiple chances and alternative sentences etc., but now she's in jail. Our friends took her little girl in -- the father is out of the picture, naturally. She's been spending a good deal of time at our house -- and somehow she's a pretty good kid. I think she really craved some attention, structure and a few boundaries. They love their granddaughter -- but are pretty resentful too -- they were just at the point where they wanted to do some traveling etc. Good luck with everything -- and sorry you're having to take on an additional burden at an already difficult time. Peace.


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## Kevin (Jun 20, 2013)

G.P.s raising the G. kids...common story. Gby for taking her in.  She could do much worse.


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## Foxee (Jun 20, 2013)

Wow, Mod, I've not been here much what with the start of summer and juggling kids (yes, I am very talented) so I didn't know all of this was going on. Sorry to hear that the granddaughter has so little to depend on with her own parents, glad you can take her in even though it definitely is not the ideal thing. Glad you're still with us, we're pulling for you!


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## moderan (Jun 20, 2013)

Thank you all.
Joe-that's exactly it. The child needs structure and attention, and needs to know that her wishes and needs are respected. That she'll have, and a stable environment for the first time in her life.
Just wanted you people to know what's going on...I haven't forgotten about or abandoned the projects I've undertaken on behalf of this website, or forgotten about or abandoned wf...but I won't be around much for a while.
At some point it means househunting-I have to give up my studio so that the child can have a bedroom. That isn't going to work for me forever.


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## moderan (Jun 27, 2013)

At last-the surgery is scheduled. July 19th I go under the knife. Can't wait. The loops of intestine are protruding further and further over my navel and I'm sporting a pillsbury doughboy (if that worthy had cousin itt's hair) look as I'm carrying about forty pounds of bloat. My knees hate me-tipped the scales at 260 this morning. It'll take a year of swimming and chasing the child to melt that off. In the meantime I can't even sit up straight for very long (why I'm not here much), and I wear a "cummerbund" for most daily business.
Faith (ironic name given my "belief system") is due to arrive Friday or Saturday, we're told. She and her parents are currently in Louisiana waiting for a truckload (he drives long-haul).


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## Ariel (Jun 27, 2013)

Wow, sounds hard, Mod.  I wish nothing but the best for you.


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## moderan (Jun 27, 2013)

The waiting is the hardest part. The rest is just life.


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## Ariel (Jun 27, 2013)

Isn't that a song?  I am on the other end of the spectrum when it comes to kids.  Not old enough to be grandma, yet, but I have my step-mother who keeps telling me that she's not taking in my kid.  Considering I have just a step-daughter and I don't plan on giving her to my step-mother (pretty sure she'd boil or roast her for dinner or something) then the point is rather moot.


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## moderan (Jun 27, 2013)

It is a Tom Petty song, yes. 
Let's just say that I'm uncomfortably aware of where my center of gravity is.


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## Pluralized (Jun 27, 2013)

That's rough, man. Hoping you get recovered quick-like and back to an upright lifestyle. I know we're all just ethereal images 'round here, but you have a lot of people thinking about you and wishing you well. Good thoughts your way.


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## Kevin (Jun 27, 2013)

Tom Petty? amsaw probably heard that one in the womb.   What Pluralised said, Moddy. Read my first H.P. Lovecraft last month._The Best of..._ thanks to you...


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## Ariel (Jun 27, 2013)

Probably did hear Tom Petty in the womb.  Doesn't make it bad music or me too young to appreciate it!

We should throw a surprise "welcome back, moddy" party when he's feeling better.


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## Kevin (Jun 27, 2013)

amsawtell said:


> Probably did hear Tom Petty in the womb.  Doesn't make it bad music or me too young to appreciate it!
> 
> We should throw a surprise "welcome back, moddy" party when he's feeling better.


am- I didn't mean anything by it. We fogies love you young people with all your ideas and such.(poke, poke). A party sounds great but I'd like him to cook. It would sort of be a party for us then, wouldn't it?


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## moderan (Jun 27, 2013)

Pluralized said:


> That's rough, man. Hoping you get recovered quick-like and back to an upright lifestyle. I know we're all just ethereal images 'round here, but you have a lot of people thinking about you and wishing you well. Good thoughts your way.


You cyberpeople can be okay sometimes.:cool2:



Kevin said:


> Tom Petty? amsaw probably heard that one in the womb.   What Pluralised said, Moddy. Read my first H.P. Lovecraft last month._The Best of..._ thanks to you...



Thank you. And I'm pleased that you got to read that. Hope you enjoyed it.

I'll cook for the party. I always do.


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## Kevin (Jun 27, 2013)

I liked it a lot. I just drank 'a' beer (just one) and thought you might like this: THX 1138 ending scene (English, Full HD) - YouTube


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## moderan (Jun 30, 2013)

I have that movie on my computer. SW was so disappointing.


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