# Strange Fire



## calbab

[FONT=&Verdana][FONT=&Verdana]*
*[/FONT][/FONT][FONT=&Verdana][FONT=&Verdana][FONT=&Verdana][FONT=&Verdana]*[FONT=&Verdana][FONT=&Verdana]
ANIMA FIRE *
[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=&Verdana]Firebrands spread like rage
when tongues were set afire[/FONT][FONT=&Verdana].
  [/FONT][/FONT][/FONT][/FONT][/FONT][FONT=&Verdana][FONT=&Verdana][FONT=&Verdana]Men were found standing frigid
naked in the briar seeking 
ignition from the Light. 
[/FONT][/FONT][/FONT]
© Calbab 2018​ *The Winner!!! 
My New Poem!
*Special thanks to all sharing a proposal poem.
​


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## jenthepen

Wow! This is a wonderfully powerful poem to give us, calbab. I can read this at least two ways - one as a spiritual moment of understanding and the other, much darker, as an indictment on prejudice and racial abuse.

There are probably more ways that your poem might be interpreted and that is the amazing thing about all art - but poetry in particular - it can awaken thoughts and ideas in the minds of others.

There is no reason for you to share your meaning, unless you want to, a poem is a beast that can fight for itself and live its own life.

I can't think of any way that I would change this one. It is haunting and enigmatic. Thank you for sharing it with us.


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## Pelwrath

Callab;
     A nicely written and enjoyable poem. I think your 2nd line is the strongest, a suggestion I would offer is to switch the first two lines. Thanks for sharing.


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## mayko

This is an intriguing poem; Jen's comment about multiple interpretations really rang true to me. This poem, though not explicit in subject, is deeply evocative. 
Thanks for sharing this, I really enjoyed it.


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## calbab

Jen, how kind of you. You are right there is meaning for me inside it. I think I will let it "beast out" for a spell. Thank you so much for your words.


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## calbab

Interesting, I am new at this. Which way will make the first two lines sound less like prose you think? Anybody, please.



Pelwrath said:


> Callab;
> A nicely written and enjoyable poem. I think your 2nd line is the strongest, a suggestion I would offer is to switch the first two lines. Thanks for sharing.


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## calbab

It is my first effort here and only my third effort in life. It means a lot to me that someone else enjoys it. Thank you so much.  BTW, you mention it is not clear in subject: Do you think it should be clearer?



mayko said:


> This is an intriguing poem; Jen's comment about multiple interpretations really rang true to me. This poem, though not explicit in subject, is deeply evocative.
> Thanks for sharing this, I really enjoyed it.


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## Pelwrath

calbab said:


> Interesting, I am new at this. Which way will make the first two lines sound less like prose you think? Anybody, please.




Calab, if by prose you mean telling, then try not to do that. Hint at it, use simile. EX: "When tongue were set on fire" is similie and a good use of it. Think of poetry as a parable. You tell a story with hints, panache and inference.  Let the reader enjoy the meaning of your words. Not all will get it, not all with see the same things and that's alright.

I think the line: "Firebrands spread like rage" is a very powerful line.  Now, the question is, do you feel the same way?  Having it as the second line doesn't make this an uninteresting or meaningless poem.  It's your poem, your words and meaning.  It's personal to you.  That's the most important thing, as a poet, for you to understand. I've been there, done that and still am there. Nobodies suggestions, unless they are about SPaG are right, unless you take them to heart.  Time is on your side. Play with everyone's suggestions, to see how they feel to you. If you don't understand a suggestion, ask that person to explain it.


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## calbab

I wonder about punctuation in 'Strange Fire' if it is correct, and or needed.


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## calbab

I'm trying it! What do you think? How does it roll off the tongue? Anybody.



Pelwrath said:


> Calab, if by prose you mean telling, then try not to do that. Hint at it, use simile. EX: "When tongue were set on fire" is similie and a good use of it. Think of poetry as a parable. You tell a story with hints, panache and inference.  Let the reader enjoy the meaning of your words. Not all will get it, not all with see the same things and that's alright.
> 
> I think the line: "Firebrands spread like rage" is a very powerful line.  Now, the question is, do you feel the same way?  Having it as the second line doesn't make this an uninteresting or meaningless poem.  It's your poem, your words and meaning.  It's personal to you.  That's the most important thing, as a poet, for you to understand. I've been there, done that and still am there. Nobodies suggestions, unless they are about SPaG are right, unless you take them to heart.  Time is on your side. Play with everyone's suggestions, to see how they feel to you. If you don't understand a suggestion, ask that person to explain it.


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## mayko

I _personally_ like some ambiguity in poetry and I don't think this one needs changed in that regard. The possibility for multiple interpretations in your poem is rooted in compelling words and strong imagry, which to me makes it more enticing. I actually read the poem a couple of times because it made me want to discover meaning, which is a powerful quality for a poem to have. Of course, it's really about your preferences.


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## Pelwrath

Mayko has a very good point, Caleb. Ambiguity arises from different means people take from your poem. I like the new poem, to me it's better than the original. Now, when you do revise a poem, please keep the original along with the revision, so others can see the changes and progress you're making.


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## calbab

I just figured out that there is a "View First Unread" link I can press to see when new comments arrive.
Thank you, mayko. I will definitely consider it. Personally, I like the original better too. That said, I want my 'efforts' to be "sound" too, if that is the right word. LOL.



mayko said:


> I _personally_ like some ambiguity in poetry and I don't think this one needs changed in that regard. The possibility for multiple interpretations in your poem is rooted in compelling words and strong imagry, which to me makes it more enticing. I actually read the poem a couple of times because it made me want to discover meaning, which is a powerful quality for a poem to have. Of course, it's really about your preferences.


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## calbab

Hi Pelwrath! It's Calbab. (-:

I will post the original post above the one there now. I will let them both be considered. I am glad you are consistent in your choice!  Right now I tend to like the Original better - but, I am willing to explore this longer. Thanks so much for sharing. 
(I just figured out how to find new comments easier on the, "View First Read,' link!




Pelwrath said:


> Mayko has a very good point, Caleb. Ambiguity arises from different means people take from your poem. I like the new poem, to me it's better than the original. Now, when you do revise a poem, please keep the original along with the revision, so others can see the changes and progress you're making.


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## H.Brown

calbab said:


> [FONT=&Verdana][FONT=&Verdana]*STRANGE FIRE*
> [/FONT][/FONT]
> [FONT=&Verdana]Firebrands spread like rage
> when tongues were set afire[/FONT][FONT=&Verdana];
> [/FONT][FONT=&Verdana]men were found standing
> [/FONT][FONT=&Verdana]frigid and naked in the briar patch,
> [/FONT]seeking ignition from the Light.​ © Calbab 2018 ​



Hi Calbab, I enjoyed reading your poem, you have some great imagery revolving around fire, I think that it could be tightened further. For example:

men found standing frigid,
naked in the briar, seeking 
ignition from the Light. 

Or something of the sort, only a sugestion. Also Iw as left questioning what was strange about the fire, maybe the strange element needs to be drawn out more.  i hope this helps.


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## calbab

_*ANIMA FIRE*_(proposal 2) is sounding really poetic to me today!


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## jenthepen

I agree. That new title is perfect.


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## calbab

Adds something of mystery meaning too! I like Proposal 2 more and more. Thanks Guys for offerings, sharings, and inputs! (-:


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## calbab

Thank you everybody!

I have decided on Proposal 2 as the selection for my poem:

*Anima Fire.
*
Please check it out on Page 1. I am not sure what next step (if any) I am to carry out. Again, thank you all for your help. (-:


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## nelen

Brilliant Calbab. Rich strong similes. I got so many interpretations on this.
All of them horrible.

Tuh! Nothing to criticize!!


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## calbab

All horrible? HA! Thanks for the compliment! I really do appreciate it! (-:


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## TuesdayEve

Dear calbab,
Sorry I’m late to the party.... got room for one more
opinion?
I really like the poem and the new title. I’m partial
however to the original as the rhythm flows smoother.
Also, would you consider another line or two added at 
the end...and feel that rhythm.
I think it might enhance the cadence overall. 


Firebrands spread like rage
when tongues were set afire
Men stood standing fridged
naked in the briar
seeking ignition from the Light


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## shedpog329

Like Jen I too see this poem through two different perspectives. One who (aggressively) makes their voice be heard and the other; a cry in the wilderness.  The interesting turn of phrase here is the plural use of "Men". It takes the poem down a more philosophical road when put in such context.  I really liked this one.  It reminds me a bit of the current news coming from Greece.

If I had to make any changes I think I would add some concluding epiphany at the end to wrap it all together.  Also (and I know the poem is already pretty short) perhaps maybe breaking the poem down a bit in order to absorb each part more fully, so an example could be



Firebrands spread like rage
when tongues were set afire.

Men were found standing frigid
naked in the briar(,) seeking 
ignition from the Light. 
_
The world set to flames.



_PS Just saw Tuesdays comment (I wholly agree)


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