# How to Live while writing



## luckyscars (Jul 3, 2013)

A slightly close-to-the-bone and personal issue for most of us perhaps. But for those who feel comfortable sharing it might be cathartic or at least thought provoking.

Like others I've known, I find the issue of balancing a modern, healthy lifestyle with writing difficult to say the least. The contrast between what's needed, for me at least, to complete a novel and functioning in 'the real world' can be challenging. So here's the question: How do you do it? What toll does it take on you mentally/physically?

Here's what I mean. I work up to sixty hours a week and maintain a pretty good married life. On top of that I go to school. So finding time to write is difficult. But its not just the time, which probably is an issue for everybody. I am an admitted obsessive. I spend up to three hours of my day, regardless of my condition, working on my writing. The rest of my limited free time I pretty much spend thinking about my writing. I have a few other hobbies, but out of choice I dont make a lot of time for them, because I see the time as being too precious. I could be spending it on finishing the next chapter, etc.

Some might say that is unhealthy or whatever, but the fact is I love it. Among my happiest moments, on a similar level to the time I spend with my wife, are those where I can be alone and write. I craft my work schedule to compliment this whenever possible. I get up early and stay up late. If I didnt have to leave the house, I could easily imagine myself spending up to a week sat in front of the computer pounding away.

While this does make me happy, I know the lack of exercise/sleep and general diversity has its side effects. But here's the thing: I don't want to do anything else. Not until I have finished. Don't get me wrong, its not that I don't care about anything else. And when the book is finished then I have every intention of taking at least a month off. Yet oftentimes I question how others can even think of doing anything other than write, at least until their project is completed. All I can think about is how little time we have on this planet and how much there is to write about.

Am I the only one who feels this way?


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## OurJud (Jul 3, 2013)

I really do admire people like you, luckyscars. Those people who can do all that and still find time for their writing.

I'm a pathetic example in all honesty. I live alone and have been out of work for a considerable amount of time. Creative writing is my passion, and yet despite having all the time and freedom in the world, I do very little of it because I'm constantly losing my battles with self-doubt, depression, lack of enthusiasm and motivation. I also find giving in when the writing isn't flowing, almost impossible to resist. This is why I could count my finished projects on the fingers of my hands, whilst needing a calculator for all the _un_finished ones.

Sometimes when writing I'll have real moments of excitment where I praise myself for a great sentence or use of a particular word. Then the next day I'll read it again and wonder what I was getting so excited about as it sounds dull and amateurish.

I'm sorry, I did intent to address your thread question, but I think I may have strayed.

Move along, people.


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## Skodt (Jul 3, 2013)

I find getting into a groove is the only way to continue my writing. Knowing that everyday I will be coming back helps me sit the story down, but yet still feel accomplished. I will be the first to admit that my perfection issues are non existent. I hate to edit with a passion. I write the story and move on to my next one. I have finished to the words, "The end," about four times now; in accordance to novels, but I don't find myself rushing to edit them at first. They all have since been edited, but I won't try to fool anyone and say that the process is any fun at all. I love to write and hate to correct myself. Yet, I know a great weakness is thinking you said everything right the first time.


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## FleshEater (Jul 3, 2013)

My job has slowed down considerably, and in this I'm able write a lot of the time at work. So, when the work day is done and I'm home, I don't even worry about writing. I read, watch movies, spend time with my wife and son, anything but worry about my writing. Life is too short to bury yourself away from all the experiences the world has to offer. However, I also look at it like no one gives one care in the world if my story gets out or not, so why rush it? If I'm in the mood to write, I write, and if not, who cares?


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## Jeko (Jul 3, 2013)

10:00-11:00am = writing time, at the moment. One page a day. Once I'm back at school I'll shift it to earlier/later. My brother's off to uni (hopefully!) so I'll have a room to myself, and far more freedom to write than usual.

All my other time is spent on other stuff.


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## Folcro (Jul 3, 2013)

Most writing is done in the head. Especially for me. I have, like many writers, an obsessive personality and am a very deep thinker. So deep that I can at times get lost in my own imagination, conflicting with reality. It can be very scary. For me, the important thing is to keep a balanced diet, exorcise, and discipline myself not to spend too much time with the things I love the most. It is a simple process, and maybe a little ironic. And even I have trouble keeping up with what I know I need to do to make my life better. It's all about discipline.


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## Nickleby (Jul 3, 2013)

A job (or two or three) and a family will eat up your time, and there's nothing you can do about it. I like to dream about turning my writing into my job.

I also like to dream about sitting on a beach in Tahiti and watching sharks eat my co-workers.


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## Gamer_2k4 (Jul 3, 2013)

I have a job with computers, so I just do my editing during the work day.  That frees up the rest of my time to do other activities I enjoy.


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## squidtender (Jul 3, 2013)

FleshEater said:


> However, I also look at it like no one gives one care in the world if my story gets out or not, so why rush it?



Well THAT'S just not true . . .


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## Sam (Jul 3, 2013)

At the moment I'm working three days a week looking after my father's farm; I've just finished my first-year exams for my master's degree; I teach two workshops a week for aspiring writers in my local GAA (Gaelic Athletic Association) club; occasionally I tutor kids whose parents know that I'm very proficient at English and always nag me to prepare their little juniors for exams; and I'm 150,000 words into my latest thriller and 60,000 words into a horror novel I've been putting on the back-burner for two years. 

I will stipulate that I'm not married. Until approximately five months ago, however, I was in a steady relationship. I don't have any kids as yet, but there isn't a day goes by that I'm not busier than a bee. I get up at seven every morning. Three of those involve shepherding cows to the milker (twice a day). It's hard work – one of the reasons why I stopped doing it full-time a few years back. Two of those days involve a ten o'clock workshop in a small room in my local football (Gaelic) club about two miles from my house. Did I mention I live on a farm? I cut the lawns at my house and my father's. Combined, that's about one-and-a-quarter acres each week. I don't have a sit-on lawnmower because it's a waste of money and cutting the lawn is good exercise. We have nineteen fields consisting thirty-one acres of land, half of which has to be cut and baled for silage every summer. Guess who does that? 

I'm not saying this because I think my life is harder than anyone else's. It truly isn't. I see people heading into pubs at nine o'clock in the morning because they can't cope with their life. That's hell for me. I have my health and daily doses of fresh, country air. Sometimes I'll sit on my porch and look across the countryside for inspiration. I've learned that to make time for anything in your life, you have to be willing to sacrifice something else. Apart from a game of football on a Sunday, I don't watch television all that often. When I used to, I realised that I was losing three and four hours of my day watching crap that was, in all honesty, highly missable – despite what the adverts claimed. I lost an hour every evening cooking dinners for something different, when all I needed to do was boil a few eggs, let them cool, and mix with some veg, greenery, and couple of slices of ham. Or boil a breast of chicken instead of the eggs. I lost thirty minutes in the morning reading the newspaper while eating breakfast, until I realised that the crap in the newspaper didn't have any bearing on my life. I'll never understand why people obsess about what other people are doing/wearing/eating/saying. They often lay blame at the Paparazzi for taking pictures of celebrities all the time. Truth is, if people stopped buying the trash magazines, the Paparazzi would go out of business. 

I love writing, and the reality is that I can do without a lot of things in my life. I can do without it. Something has to give.


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## squidtender (Jul 3, 2013)

I need a nap just reading all that, sam . . . kudos that you manage a busy life. Work, the house, family and writing four nights a week is plenty for me. Heck, I get mad when I have to feed the cats. I can't even imagine having to milk something


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## Staff Deployment (Jul 3, 2013)

OurJud said:


> I could count my finished projects on the fingers of my hands, whilst needing a calculator for all the _un_finished ones.



I think many people are like this. My "Unfinished Stories" folder is gargantuan and impenetrable, while my "Finished" folder has a measly four projects crammed inside of paltry length.

But having an immense library of abandoned projects is better than an empty shelf.


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## OurJud (Jul 3, 2013)

Actually I had almost everything I'd ever written (unfinished and finished) on my other computer and didn't bother grabbing any of it when I got my new machine. I convinced myself it wasn't worth the headache and that it was all worthless poop anyway.

Stupid, Eh? Mind you, I wasn't in a good place then.


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## FleshEater (Jul 3, 2013)

Does anyone else find the daily distractions a must for creativity? For instance, ideally, if I was laid off I would have it in my mind that I was going to dedicate eight hours or more to my writing, because that time would have been spent in the office anyways. However in reality, I would probably never write again, simply because the routine distraction wasn't there, driving me to keep writing. Almost like all the crap is okay because my escape is always there, making any chance I get to write all the sweeter.


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## luckyscars (Jul 4, 2013)

Woah, didn't think I'd get this kind of a response!

One thing I should add regarding myself is that, in spite of what I just said, I am not particularly productive. Certainly not to the point I would expect or wish anybody to admire me (though I appreciate the gesture) I suppose that's why I question my lifestyle so much. Even though I dedicate my time to writing, I often struggle to clear more than a thousand words a day. Unfortunately I spend most of the time gazing into space and thinking about it rather than actually doing it.

One thing about discipline...it gets talked about a lot and we all kind of accept as sacred the idea that we _should_ be disciplined. We _should _be healthy, eat well, maintain functional relationships, etc etc etc. But I personally struggle with this. I mean, I see the basic logic: A healthy mind and body is more productive. But I'm afraid I suffer (is it suffering?) with some apathy on that. We talk about the importance of self discipline but we dont talk very often about how to achieve it. I know one answer would be something like "you either got it or you dont and a good writer has it" but I don't see that as holding particularly true. With so many writers who were unhealthy, antisocial but brilliant where does discipline fit in? Does lack of self discipline actually make for a worse, as opposed to merely inefficient, writer? 

Or let me put it another way: While I've yet to familiarize myself with a highly successful and acclaimed writer who wrote religiously for a fixed time every day, ate all their vegetables, worked out and drank fruit smoothies.


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## Folcro (Jul 4, 2013)

luckyscars said:


> One thing about discipline...it gets talked about a lot and we all kind of accept as sacred the idea that we _should_ be disciplined. We _should _be healthy, eat well, maintain functional relationships, etc etc etc. But I personally struggle with this. I mean, I see the basic logic: A healthy mind and body is more productive. But I'm afraid I suffer (is it suffering?) with some apathy on that. We talk about the importance of self discipline but we dont talk very often about how to achieve it. I know one answer would be something like "you either got it or you dont and a good writer has it" but I don't see that as holding particularly true. With so many writers who were unhealthy, antisocial but brilliant where does discipline fit in? Does lack of self discipline actually make for a worse, as opposed to merely inefficient, writer?



No, no, I agree with your findings completely. The best writers (including myself  ) are lazy bums. But it eats into my happiness. Healthiness doesn't necessarily make a good writer (though I strongly believe it can make good writers better), but it makes for a happier lifestyle. And it does not hurt the craft, of that I am certain.


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## luckyscars (Jul 4, 2013)

No doubt being healthy doesnt hurt. I just never saw the benefits in it. I mean, I'm not unhealthy, but sometimes people talk as though eating organic food and going to the gym actually improves spiritual and mental - as opposed to merely physical - wellbeing. And I don't 'get' that premise. I've no doubt some people really get off on it, and no doubt some writers do too, but does it actually improve things from a creative point of view? I find it hard to believe it does. I might even suggest that perhaps, for the aspiring writer, a few nights wandering drunkenly around any city where its worth wandering might be creatively 'healthier' than spending any amount of time on a treadmill or knitting. I might even suggest that to be a great writer it is important to spend at least a few moments in the ugly, decaying and debauched cesspits of existence. Or then again perhaps not. Perhaps I'm just trying to justify it for myself. All I know is I spent ten years playing football and eating celery and it didnt teach me a blessed thing about life, nor do anything for my happiness other than tone my calf muscles - all gone now.


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## Folcro (Jul 4, 2013)

luckyscars said:


> Perhaps I'm just trying to justify it for myself. All I know is I spent ten years playing football and eating celery and it didnt teach me a blessed thing about life.



We're all trying to justify ourselves... one of my favorite ideas of the late philosopher Richard Jeni. 

I believe that, when _supplemented_ by exorcise, the mind is in a better position to apply and meditate on what it has learned. I'm not a proponent of organic foods, but I'm told it can improve a person's mood. Improving mood, which aerobic exorcise is more or less proven to do in the case of most people, can help motivate a person to go out and learn, thereby vicariously benefiting from the process.


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## Staff Deployment (Jul 4, 2013)

Folcro said:


> I believe that, when _supplemented_ by exorcise, the mind is in a better position to apply and meditate on what it has learned.



Yes I find I am a considerably worse writer when possessed by Satan.

Luckyscars, pulling 1000 words in a day is a stupendous accomplishment. I barely manage that and I'm basically in full-out no-obligation winter-break shut-in mode.


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## philistine (Jul 4, 2013)

Over the years, I've developed something of a compulsion when it comes to getting in my daily dose of reading and writing. The two are indispensable from my daily regimen, and should I miss one of them- or both, even- I can get quite grumpy. The times I've been sidetracked or forced into other work-related (or otherwise) obligations, I can turn into one mean son of a bean. 

However, and this ties somewhat into the previous compulsion, I spend a lot of time on my own, sometimes up to a fortnight at a time, seeing no-one but members of my family. I'm an introvert, and so thrive off of solitude. That goes without saying that when I'm out and about, working or whatever else, is time spent NOT writing, NOT reading, NOT researching, and so forth. When that goes on for a prolonged period, again, I can turn into quite nasty. 

You might say that if I didn't allot a large percentage of my time to doing the aforementioned, I'd probably struggle to find even an hour a day. As it stands, I do, and I don't.

EDIT: I'd also like to say that a thousand words per session/day is quite a large achievement. I read recently that Michael Chabon (author of _Wonder Boys_) writes for five hours every night, without fail. He starts at ten in the evening, and works sedulously until three in the morning. He even hinted that sometimes he doesn't meet his personal quota of a thousand words. it's hard work, without a doubt.


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## luckyscars (Jul 4, 2013)

Well that's exactly the case for me Phil. I love the idea of friends and all, but honestly I hate most of what goes along with them. There is rarely a moment now when I am out that I dont wish I was home. I don't enjoy socializing, not because it isnt fun but because its a huge waste of time. 

I suppose I see it that my social life is imaginary. My best friends are my characters. 

That might sound sad, but the awful truth is it makes me tremendously happy.


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## Origen (Jul 4, 2013)

I took a creative writing course once and the teacher lamented to me in a one on one session that one of his most talented writers ever, a girl from his previous class, would never be published because she didn't want to do the work.  Maybe that's a common theme; that genius excludes workmanship--except for a certain class like Mozart, for example.  Personally, I think someone will write because they have no choice in the matter.


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## escorial (Jul 4, 2013)

Never loose sight of family values man you mention,cos if that goes you may find your love for writing gone.


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## Jeko (Jul 4, 2013)

1,000 words a day sounds very good; discipline is always a good thing for a writer. I do around 250 good words a day at the moment, plus any extra if I'm inspired/bored at another time in the day.

I'm not terribly healthy myself (pretty underweight), but that is in no way because of my writing. It is however, I feel, having a negative impact on my writing, so I'm looking to do something about it in the next few years.


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## SarahStrange (Jul 4, 2013)

I wake up at 5am every weekday, write for an hour, go on a run, get all the dishes/laundry/cleaning done and then write some more. I work three days a week, so on those days I do all of that before I go to work at 8:30am. The I come home, make dinner for my household and write some more. I guess that means I do an average of 800-1,000 words a day. I focus more on scenes than words though. When I had a word goal, I found I was writing a bunch of unnecessary junk just to meet my goal.

It's different from summer break in high school, since most of my friends are now from out of state. It makes me feel less obligated to portion up my time to my friends too. Now I can be selfish and not feel bad about it!   That is _such_ a wonderful luxury. 

I'm squeezing as much as possible out of this summer for writing. I probably won't be able to do it for the next 3ish summers what with internships, classes, study abroad and full time work. Sometimes it's hard hearing that blasted alarm screaming at me at 5am, but I just remind myself of how badly I want to finish this damned book and suddenly getting up isn't so hard. 

I've always been told from basically the entire world (school, media, friends) that you have to wait to start your life. They tell you in high school: in college! That's where it begins. They tell you in college: when you get a job! That's when it starts. When you get a job they say: when you have a family! That's when it begins.... *NOW* is good, thanks. So that's what I'm doing this summer. I'm starting the life I want. 

It's all paying off, because for the first time I can see the finish line. I'm predicting I'll be done with my first draft by next friday. And by predict, I mean I _will_ be done by then. No exceptions. 

I think it's more difficult for people who are older. What with a spouse, kids, full time jobs and big families. So a lot of you who are talking about stuff like that have my respect. Juggling your life is _not_ easy. It takes a great deal of skill.


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## Myers (Jul 4, 2013)

I've never thought about it to this extent. I carve out about an hour  for writing in the early morning. I'd like to write more, but that's  usually all I can manage, and I'm grateful for that. For me, contentment  comes from balance. Family, friends, career, and I try to reserve some time  for doing things spontaneously, or doing not much of anything. I love  writing and it's very important to me, but it's just part of the mix.  Today is a holiday, so I'm going to do a little more writing. Better get  to it.


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## philistine (Jul 4, 2013)

As for living a healthy lifestyle, I still lift occasionally, though frequently indulge in booze, cigarettes, junk food, hookah, cigars, long periods of almost comic inertia (I did a Capote, practically living in the bed for three or four days) and all that kind of thing. 

With what is germane to that part of the conversation, a friend and I once had an interesting thought about all that; that is, the serial abuse anyone with any artistic inclinations may undertake (whether it be writing, painting, drawing, etc). Substance abuse, if I remember rightly, has a strong association with people who utilise the left part of their brain much more so than the ordinary person (or it may be the right, I'd have to check). I can't remember the specifics, though someone brought it up on here not too long ago, maybe Lewdog. 

It may sound twisted, though part of me believes that if you do abuse certain substances, if you create good work as a result of it, it's almost justified. That sentence will probably have a few heads nodding in total acquiescence, though I'd imagine many will be thinking 'you must be nuts'. I dunno, you know?


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## Staff Deployment (Jul 4, 2013)

DANG Sarah now that is a schedule that would probably literally kill me. Like I would be so tired I would wither and die. Don't know how you do it, good on ya mate. :drunk:


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## J Anfinson (Jul 4, 2013)

Nickleby said:


> I also like to dream about sitting on a beach in Tahiti and watching sharks eat my co-workers.



View attachment 4745


I'm usually pretty unproductive. I have a major discipline problem, and I know it. I know I SHOULD be writing every day whether I feel the urge, or have the inspiration for it, but I don't. It's only when my muse starts whispering in my ear that I get anything accomplished, so I'm probably not much of a role model. I've written 6000 words on the best day, and nothing for a week at other times.


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## Dictarium (Jul 4, 2013)

Being in high school helps a lot. I have a lot of required writing for school so that helps to make sure I can do it regularly. Then, well, it's high school, and the homework load isn't immense, so I have a fair amount of free time to write. You jelly, adults?


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## patskywriter (Jul 4, 2013)

Dictarium said:


> … You jelly, adults?



??? Eastern PA slang of some sort?


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## philistine (Jul 4, 2013)

Dictarium said:


> Being in high school helps a lot. I have a lot of required writing for school so that helps to make sure I can do it regularly. Then, well, it's high school, and the homework load isn't immense, so I have a fair amount of free time to write. You jelly, adults?



I wouldn't re-experience high school for all the oil in Arabia. :worked_till_5am:


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## Kevin (Jul 4, 2013)

patskywriter said:


> ??? Eastern PA slang of some sort?


 I think he's referring to adults' relative 'jelliness' as compared to more youthful types (jiggle, jiggle, jiggle...giggle).


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## Dictarium (Jul 4, 2013)

patskywriter said:


> ??? Eastern PA slang of some sort?


More like high-schooler, young-adult slang I s'pose. Jelly is short for jealous.


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## patskywriter (Jul 4, 2013)

Dictarium said:


> More like high-schooler, young-adult slang I s'pose. Jelly is short for jealous.



LOL, okay. Then my answer would be N-O. There's no way I'd want to be a kid again or be jealous of someone for being young. I like my job/business(es), own a house and vehicle, and enjoy my friends and family. I love my adult life and being in control of it—well, at least I have more control than I did when i was a kid. In fact, the only downside is that my parents aren't alive anymore. But, eventually, I'll be gone, too—but hopefully not for years to come. Such is the circle of life, I suppose. :subdued:


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