# Harlequin



## Bloggsworth (Mar 10, 2013)

*Harlequin
*
Sweat wet shirts steam
in late November sun.
Front rows, three by three,
six pairs of eyes
unblinking in their enmity,
spine-jarring grunt
of shoulder on shoulder,
heads interlocking,
the rasp of stubble on cheek,
twinned stench of beer and body-odour,
nape of neck taking the strain,
the rutting upward heave,
sinews stretched,
discs compressed,
pain ignored, breath forced
from straining lungs,
sixteen young men
wrestling for half a yard
of muddied turf.

*Break break break!*
​


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## Travers (Mar 10, 2013)

Brilliant Blogsworth, nary a bad point to bring up.

Not being a fan of rugby myself matters not, the combative, competitive, grueling nature of the sport is excitingly and viscerally brought to life.


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## WechtleinUns (Mar 11, 2013)

Bloggsworth, you might be taking yourself too seriously, here. 

Great poem, by the way. ^_^


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## Bloggsworth (Mar 11, 2013)

WechtleinUns said:


> Bloggsworth, you might be taking yourself too seriously, here.
> 
> Great poem, by the way. ^_^



I have never taken myself seriously, and have no intention of ever doing so.


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## Ariel (Mar 11, 2013)

I have mixed feelings about this.  The line "rasp of stubble on cheek" brought this into an almost sexual arena and, personally, I think it can be left out.


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## Bloggsworth (Mar 11, 2013)

amsawtell said:


> I have mixed feelings about this.  The line "rasp of stubble on cheek" brought this into an almost sexual arena and, personally, I think it can be left out.



It is/was common for the hard men to forgo shaving in order to inflict discomfort on an opponent - In the front row of a scrum there is no way of avoiding cheek by jowl contact.


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## Fats Velvet (Mar 11, 2013)

amsawtell said:


> I have mixed feelings about this.  The line "rasp of stubble on cheek" brought this into an almost sexual arena and, personally, I think it can be left out.



Was one of my favorite lines.   I would be surprised if it was unintentionally suggestive.  Given that male dominated full-contact sports often have a sexual undercurrent bubbling beneath the turf, it seems appropriate.


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## Ariel (Mar 11, 2013)

Well, I've never seen a rugby match and I know next to nothing about it (I also know next to nothing about American football) so I'm really coming to this as an outsider.


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## Fats Velvet (Mar 11, 2013)

amsawtell said:


> Well, I've never seen a rugby match and I know next to nothing about it (I also know next to nothing about American football) so I'm really coming to this as an outsider.



Understood.


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## GonneLights (Mar 11, 2013)

This is great. I didn't get that it was about rugby, ahaha. I thought it was about like, the Italian trenches or something. But yes, this is great, man. The rhythm is beautiful, it bounces and hops and it really sings. Parts like, _"twinned stench of beer and body-odour, nape of neck taking the strain,_" it belches, man, it's great. The opening two lines are the best Ii think, though. But the rhythm is very interesting.


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## Kevin (Mar 11, 2013)

_Hmmm... how to portray raw animal agression (within the constraints of sport, not war) to the uninitiated?_


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## Squalid Glass (Mar 19, 2013)

Somehow the last 3 lines threw me out of the experience. I liked how the other lines were very sparse, but I think the last bit gives too much away. I like the fragmented images because it matches a game - you don't see everything at once; you see snippets.

Nevertheless, I liked this a lot. I don't know anything about rugby, but I certainly felt the passion of the game here. Very nice job.


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## bajmahal (Mar 19, 2013)

I like the sexual tension that's created - especially once you gave us the innocent explanation.  
This is such a rugged poem - I really like it.
If you don't mind me asking - why do you call it _Harlequin_?


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## Travers (Mar 19, 2013)

The Harlequins is a London rugby team.


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## bajmahal (Mar 19, 2013)

Well now I've just tipped my hand that I'm a big ol' dumb American.  Oh well.


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## Bloggsworth (Mar 19, 2013)

Squalid Glass said:


> Somehow the last 3 lines threw me out of the experience. I liked how the other lines were very sparse, but I think the last bit gives too much away. I like the fragmented images because it matches a game - you don't see everything at once; you see snippets.



I think you are right about the last 3 lines before _Break break break_! which perform a similar function to _Hut hut hut_ or whatever it is the quarterback shouts, in that they warn the forwards that the ball is out of the scrum and that they can break away to play independently.


*Harlequin
*
Sweat wet shirts steam
in late November sun.
Front rows, three by three,
six pairs of eyes
unblinking in their enmity,
spine-jarring grunt
of shoulder on shoulder,
heads interlocking,
the rasp of stubble on cheek,
twinned stench of beer and body-odour,
nape of neck taking the strain,
the rutting upward heave,
sinews stretched,
discs compressed,
pain ignored, breath forced
from straining lungs.

_Break break break!

_​


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## Squalid Glass (Mar 19, 2013)

Yeah I figured that was what that line meant; good to know my athletic instincts are spot on 

I like the revised version much more. Very powerful ending now. Superb.


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## Vitaly Ana (Mar 21, 2013)

Agree with SG about the last three lines. Well done though. I used to play Rugby League. Not so many scrums but when I saw them on TV there was such a unique force to them. Nicely done!!

:sunny:


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