# A feeling for place



## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

My current WiP is set in a distant future US. I, however, am from a present day UK who only knows the US from the movies.

I know they say write about what you know, but I am adamant my story will be set in America. This I'm doing as a challenge to myself more than out of necessity. I've never written anything set outside my home country and I want to see if I can write convincingly and authentically when portraying America (albeit a distant future America), its people and the way they speak.

Various terms and spellings are easy enough to research - many I already know - but something I've always struggled with, even when the setting is my home country, is giving a real sense of location.

The fact that my story is set in the distant future gives me some real freedom in terms of setting, but I still want to make sure people know where the story is set. This is not because the setting is important in any way, but simply because I want to 'ground' it somewhere people will be familiar with, whether that be because they live there or because, like me, they know it from the movies.

What I'm asking, therefore, is what areas of America do you think are likely to flourish in the distant future, and would you still expect to read about actual localities?

So far I've avoided making the setting obvious, but the last scene I wrote involved a communication between the serial killer and my MC, in which the killer tells him the location of one of his victims. This is the conversation my MC has with his partner shortly afterwards.



> “Frank, I need you to dispatch a TR unit to the Maple Tree stadium. There’s a couple of derelict warehouses on the waste ground behind. Somewhere in one of them there’s a body. Female. Listen, Frank, we have about eighteen minutes, max, before we lose her. I’ll see you there.” And with that he ended the call.



Now the thing is, I don't even know if there _is_ a Maple Tree stadium with some waste ground and warehouses, but this is where the distant future setting is so helpful.

If you read the above, fairly early on in the story and before you were _entirely_ sure where the story was set, would this give you a sense of location, or would you expect more details like street names etc?

I suppose this links back to my other thread where I ask about street names and addresses, but I'm just trying to get a feel for how much info I need to provide in order to give a real sense of location.

Any tips, comments, advice much appreciated.


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## Myers (Jul 24, 2013)

Regarding your excerpt, I’d look at how stadiums are named now in the U.S. and get a handle on that. If it’s a venue where professional sports are played, then it could be named for the team or a corporate sponsor or a former team owner etc. I’m not into world building, but I’m guessing it’s up to you to figure out why and how those naming conventions would change, if they would change at all. Would they even be playing the same sports or using the stadium of the same purposes?

But “Maple Tree Stadium” sounds very contrived, like you’re going out of your way to pick something generic. And it doesn’t really work according to how stadiums are currently named, so it sounds inauthentic right of the bat, without even considering that your story takes place in the future. And it seems like there’s got to be some connection on that level.


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## Sandy (Jul 24, 2013)

Perhaps the key phrase is _distant future_.  Americans are constantly tearing down, rebuilding, spreading out of traditional urban centers, usually as a result of decay (Detroit is a good example) or calamity (New Orleans).  Are the same basic urban centers still in place?  Or has some terrible event caused people to pick up and form new communities?

If it's very, very distant, I would think the familiar landmarks of today would be long gone and replaced with those that met the needs of the people then.  (Geology often has much to do with structures; for example, the skyscrapers of Manhattan exist because the bedrock under the island is so hard.)

These might be driven by geography/climate of a future continent, so the major geological features of North America would likely be still in place (mountains, valleys, plateaus, coastal plains) and perhaps even similar in climate (sub tropical to permafrost).  There might be some modification based on trends in global warming, but that, too, may have subsided by the time your future society gets going.]

Hope that helps!


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## Fred (Jul 24, 2013)

Another UK resident here, and one that's writing a novel set in Maine (I have good reason… honestly!). Fortunately, there's a ton of web resource to research about US locations, and when you add that to the probability that most people in the US as well as the UK who don't work in law enforcement/hospital emergency rooms/NASA mission control centres probably use, like you and me, TV & movies for their understanding of how certain institutions work. Your illustration works enough for me to imagine a kind of dystopian, crumbled economy (my ill-informed logic might tell me that in a healthy city economy the land surrounding a sports stadium would be too valuable  to allow it to go to waste… Or maybe the stadium is a venue so new that the surrounding plots have yet to be developed..?) The stadium name is, as you say, rendered largely irrelevant thanks to the futuristic setting - stadia are changing names or being replaced by new ones all the time. My cultural rooting is prompted by your sample to stir up an image of somewhere like _Robocop_'s "Old Detroit" (and how prescient is _that_ movie starting to look nowadays?). You don't need to add street names, imo. Anyone who's lived in a city with a sports stadium doesn't need to give another resident directions to get there. If the waste ground/warehouses are part of, for example, a larger, dilapidated industrial park, there may be specific directions available to find a certain lot ("…in one of the old Wonka chocolate warehouses on Candybar Road…" or some such) but it sounds as though there are only the two warehouses on the patch of ground behind the stadium, so unless that's not the case, it seems to work.

EDIT: Re. Myers' point - I agree that the name "Maple Tree Stadium" is a little unconvincing given modern US stadium-naming conventions (the Redskins play at FedEx Field, the Giants and Jets at the MetLife Stadium, New Orleans Saints at the Mercedes-Benz Superdome, etc.), which readers would pick up on if the culture in your future is similarly corporate-dominated as today. If, however, there has been a cultural/ideological shift to, maybe, the ecological or what have you, perhaps that might account for the names of public venues. My tuppence-worth would be to think about Myers says in the context of your future USA and imagine how that might be reflected.


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Thanks very much.

Fred, your reply delighted me, as you've described the kind of setting I'm going for fairly accurately. My setting will be a strange mix of wealth and poverty. The wealthy live in virtually impenetrable luxury tower blocks, with the lower classes living at ground level in single or double story apartment blocks. All that needs developing and may even change drastically, but the point is you've imagined this stadium and it's surrounds pretty much as I did when writing. 

Sandy, I'm not sure how distant my distant future story is set, but I agree that many of the landmarks would be gone.

Myers, thanks for pointing out that Maple Tree Stadium sounds contrived. I will rethink its name.

Finally, I think I need at least a city to set it in, even if I  customise the name slightly. As I say in my OP, what cities in the US do  you think are likely to flourish in the distant future?


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## Sandy (Jul 24, 2013)

Only those that are relevant to the population of the time as hubs for commerce or government.  Depends entirely on how far distant you are.  None of them existed 500 years ago, and many of them didn't exist 200 years ago.


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## KarlR (Jul 24, 2013)

Katniss Everdeen took a train to the capitol in Denver.  Denver?? YGBSM!  But it worked for the book.

What's your future world look like?  How far into the future are you travelling? Has global warming taken over full-tilt?  Does the east coast still exist?  What kind of weather patterns exist in your future?  What commodities are valuable and where can they be found?  That's where your population will collect.  Are you shooting for a realistic future?  Dystopic?  Fanciful?  Since the future belongs to you and your characters, you're gonna have to be the one to build it.

Best of luck with your project!


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Yes, I'm shooting for a realistic future, heavy with tech (both recreational and business) and with elements of dystopia. I'm not asking anyone to world build for me, but to just give me an idea of which city (or cities) they expect to do be doing well in a distant future.

I appreciate Sandy has tried to answer when she said:



Sandy said:


> Only those that are relevant to the population of  the time as hubs for commerce or government.  Depends entirely on how  far distant you are.  None of them existed 500 years ago, and many of  them didn't exist 200 years ago.



But as a non-American, that doesn't really tell me anything.


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## Kyle R (Jul 24, 2013)

"Maple Leaf Stadium" sounds more like something I'd find in Canada than in America. If it's a post-apocalyptic future, I'd name the stadiums things that are synonymous with Hope. Things for morale.

Like, "Promise Stadium" or the "Fortune Colosseum."

One thing you can do is look at a list of the stadiums in the U.S. and see if you like any of them, or maybe choose one and change the name slightly:

List of U.S. stadiums by capacity - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

As an American living in Canada, I'd say that, for me, I wouldn't care about street names or whatever. You can just get away with saying it's in _North America_ somewhere and then describe your own imagining of a future North America. Name things whatever you like. Change the geography however you wish. It's your future world. You are the architect.

We, the readers, are simply paying admission to go on the ride.


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Thanks, Kyle 

I already did that wiki page, but didn't want to use an actual one and couldn't think of any suitable cutomisations. Anyway, for now I've gone for the Nakai Stadium, working on the assumption that there will be lots of East Asian domination of any future world.

But, I very much like your Promise Stadium and Fortune Colosseum, so it may well change again.

As for the city, I've non-noncommittally decided on LA for now.


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## Sintalion (Jul 24, 2013)

What might benefit you is to look up companies that deal in the heavy tech you described- see where they're located, and go with something like that. Take out a map and look at the geography of the united states and compare it to those locations. Can your society flourish there? Can they transport goods in and out? Where are the resources that humans need to survive?

You could also use a search engine to do some research, which I'd advise for Americans and non-Americans alike. Just look for United States city statistics. Sort by crime, population, wealth, real estate, happiness, births- anything you want and see what comes up. Pull some cities from the top 20 and see what you like best. If you want "doing well" I'd look for lower crime rates, etc. If you don't want to just pick a city and run with it (or make up one), you'll have to do the legwork. Luckily, there are plenty of resources out there!

Sandy can't give you and answer and neither can anyone else really. We don't know the future and all the inner workings of every city. Cities are rising and falling constantly. There are politics, budget cuts, industries, immigrants, emigrants, hurricanes: technology and events shape a lot of the world, and you're the only one who knows how it shapes your world specifically. I can't really tell you how my own East Coast will fare in the distant future, let alone in an alternate one.


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## Skodt (Jul 24, 2013)

My concern is not the stadium name. Although it does scream Canada and not America. That's a trivial issue really. The thing I hope you can come across as authentic is our wording. We do not speak quite the same way as the British. We shorten, chop, slang, and make up words all the time. Unless the officer is of the olden days, or he is from Britain he does not sound like the guy you just described in your short scene. I like to use a wide variety of vocabulary. Most writers do. Though most Americans do not speak as such. A detective would be an average citizen. Unless you plan to make him a convincing intellect. Words like, derelict, waste ground, sound either old fashioned detective, or English detective. It doesn't throw off an American cop vibe. We don't talk proper here at all. It's almost scary how bad we actually sound. 

So I suggest you do some research on cop speak for Americans. Also our slang terms. Or make your own slang. We are slang machines in the states. We are akin to butchers when it comes to language.


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

So my MC doesn't sound American. That's bad.

So what would a modern day American cop say instead of 'derelict' and 'waste ground' ?

Incidentally, my protag' isn't a bruiser. He's a fairly well-educated man, but in a bit of a slump and prone to vices. Nor is he afraid to get stuck in should he need to.


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## Skodt (Jul 24, 2013)

Well most modern cops/men unless part of a political party use rougher language skills. 

_“Frank, I need you to dispatch a TR unit to the Maple Tree stadium. There’s a couple of derelict warehouses on the waste ground behind. Somewhere in one of them there’s a body. Female. Listen, Frank, we have about eighteen minutes, max, before we lose her. I’ll see you there.” And with that he ended the call.

Turns into this....

"Frank you there? I need you to get a TR unit to American Airlines Stadium. There's a couple of old warehouses near the garbage dump, somewhere in one of them is a female body. And hey, Frank, we have about eighteen or so minutes, max, before shes gone. I will meet you there."
It's subtle. It's not a huge change. But you can read the characters much different. _


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Well I admit that does sound far more American, Skodt, but the warehouses aren't near a garbage dump, they're on a patch of waste land?

Anyway, as is my habit, I'm getting carried away with silly trivialities.

I'm now not sure I can find an authentic sounding American voice. Maybe I need to set it in London, but the problem there is that I don't think the UK is going to be a dominating nation in the future. Certainly not somewhere they'd be experimenting with time reversal programs.


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## Skodt (Jul 24, 2013)

The thing is there are many american cop novels. Read a few. Get a feel for their language. Then as well watch a few detective interviews. They are all over you tube. 

A waste land such as a end of the world type setting?


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Skodt said:


> A waste land such as a end of the world type setting?



No. Perhaps waste land is the wrong word. Does this sound any more authentic?



> “Frank, I need you to get a TR unit out to Hope stadium. There’s a couple of old warehouses on the scrubland behind. Somewhere in one of them there’s a body. Female. And hey, Frank, we have about eighteen minutes, max, before she’s gone. I’ll meet you there.” And with that he ended the call.


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## Skodt (Jul 24, 2013)

I am still not sure what you mean by scrubland. The dialogue sounds better though yes.


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## Fred (Jul 24, 2013)

OurJud said:


> ...As for the city, I've non-noncommittally decided on LA for now.



You could be as inventive as you like, I guess. If the ice-sheets have melted and drowned the east coast, you might look at a map and pick any town more than a certain height above sea level and decide that's where the populations of New York, Philly and DC all fled too. Or maybe California's been swallowed by the Pacific in a massive earthquake and Las Vegas is now a major seaport? I love the freedom this kind of world-building suggests - you can do almost anything you like! To paraphrase Stan Lee, it doesn't need to be realistic, but it does need to be convincing!


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Skodt said:


> I am still not sure what you mean by scrubland. The dialogue sounds better though yes.



Is scrubland not an expression you use in the US? It's certainly not an English expression.

Anyway, scrubland


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## Fred (Jul 24, 2013)

There are all kinds of ways to go about this ("_Frank, you know that abandoned lot/vacant lot/old industrial block behind the stadium? There's a coupla burned out warehouses down there and I need you to get a TR unit out there ASAP. Somewhere in one of them there’s a body. Female. And hey, Frank, we have about eighteen minutes, max, before she’s gone. I’ll meet you there__…" _or anything else you like the sound of_) _but it's not like "wasteland" is such a bad word. I quick look around news stories about the decline of Detroit, for example, and the word "wasteland" is all over. It's just a word that says what it is. It doesn't mean TS Eliot lives there. Maybe there's some inspiring slang term you can mould for your own purposes? 

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=wasteland


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## Shadoe (Jul 24, 2013)

Some things to ponder:

In the northern US, cities are packed pretty tight, tending to grow more up than out. You'll see parking garages, probably underground, rather than parking lots. Even the suburbs tend to be packed. Businesses tend to share buildings. In the southern US, cities are more spread out. Businesses will have their own buildings, with a parking lot of their own. Suburbs are built so every huse has a spacious yard and lots of grass. No sidewalks.

Pain the north, people tend not to talk to strangers on the street. In the south, everyone believes they are somehow related to each other and just have to figure out how. Even in the cities, it is customary to greet people you pass in the street.

Life moves slower in southern states.

What is a TR unit and a waste ground?

These days, stadiums are named for the sport team that owns it or for the big name company that owns it.


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## Skodt (Jul 24, 2013)

Wasteland reminds me of a post apoc setting. The news is trying to say Detroit is deserted and dying. 

The picture you posted says vacant lot to me, or abandoned would be fine as well.


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Shadoe said:


> What is a TR unit and a waste ground?



Time Reversal (my story is sci-fi). And waste ground (at least in the UK) is illustrated by the image I posted a few posts back.

Thanks, Frank. I like 'vacant lot' and shall use this.


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## Kehawin (Jul 24, 2013)

OurJud, I agree with Skodt that we, as Americans, tend to butcher "proper" English in our speech - but don't let that worry you at the moment.  Honestly, IMO, that is an easy, easy fix.  Once you have the speeches written throughout the story, there are people willing to help effect the right affect!  

As for the words exchanges mentioned:  derelict = run down, waste ground = empty field (or lot)

And, as for where in the US, I honestly don't think you need to find a proper city to base it on.  Most of the largest cities here are known as "Megopolis" - many metropolis areas that have spread out and become virtually continuous urban sprawl.  I'm not sure how London is, if there are cities near London that are large as well (call me clueless) but the US East and West Coasts have large areas where the cities have spread so much a person crosses from one to the other without ever leaving the urban setting.  From what I hear from my brother who lives in NY, the East Coast is that way from essentially Boston to Richmond - he could have exaggerated, but I myself know that LA and Orange County are like that in Southern California, and even San Diego to some extent, and from what I remember, Northern California near San Francisco and Oakland and Sacramento are the same.  So what I am trying to say is, you could say a neighborhood is in LA and unless you talked about an ecological feature (La Brea tar pits, for example) even those in LA wouldn't necessarily know exactly where you are talking about in a future setting.  In other words, pick a region because it makes sense in your story, and build what you need.  

You've already thought about Asian influence, and economic dichotomies.  How is commerce done?  If everything is flight-based, the sky's the limit.  If the world still uses trains and semi's and ships for transport, it would make sense to keep your big cities near ports and passes through mountains and river crossings.  But as Sandy said, outside of the top 15 or so cities (population and area-wise) most US cities are fairly new (as compared to European cities) so the further into the future this is, the more likely a made-up metropolis will fly.

Sorry it's long, hope it helped.


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Kehawin said:


> Sorry it's long, hope it helped.



Very much so, especially the bit about not worrying about dialogue at this point. I think commerce will be largely air-based.

I sometimes think I only ask so many questions as an excuse not to write the damn thing! I've had it open since about 10 O'clock this morning and all I've done so far is change a single paragraph of dialogue.

I either need to change my attitude or pack up for good and save myself the frustration.


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## Kehawin (Jul 24, 2013)

Not at all!  I am the same way.  I haven't written a new word on mine in at least 2 days, due to frustration engendered by the "filtering" thread and the realization that as much as I have figured out, my protagonist is a leaf blowing in the wind merely reacting to others instead of having a goal of her own - unless you count vague "anything but this" feelings a goal.  Because I don't like to do major rewrites (I know I will need to at some point, but I also know that having things worked out before hand saves a lot), I just can't bring myself to write on, since I am aware that once she has a goal, things will change significantly.  

But I am not giving up.  I spent too long wishing I could write this, to stop now that I can.  We just have to work through it, self-doubt notwithstanding, that's all!


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## Markovich (Jul 24, 2013)

I agree with Fred, use abandoned lot/vacant lot instead of wasteland. As for the stadium, unless it's a venerable stadium, like Fenway Park or Wriggly Field, don't use the corporate name. Most Americans ignore the stupid corporate name, so "Mercedes-Benz Superdome" is just the Superdome.

I also highly recommend researching the local streets and place names. It just wouldn't be Los Angeles without mentioning the 405 freeway, or Sepulveda Boulevard, etc... Skid Row would be a great place setting for your story, especially since downtown Los Angeles is currently undergoing gentrification. 

A good example is Zola's _L'assomoir_. He uses very specific places and street names in Paris. He even gives you the route characters take when they go from one place to another. The effect is that it actually makes you want to go there, even though you know the story is fiction, it seems like it could have really happened in those places.


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

I'd 'like' your post more than once, if I could, Kehawin. Your approach to writing and - dare I say it? - hang-ups seems very similar to my own.


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Markovich said:


> I agree with Fred, use abandoned lot/vacant lot instead of wasteland. As for the stadium, unless it's a venerable stadium, like Fenway Park or Wriggly Field, don't use the corporate name. Most Americans ignore the stupid corporate name, so "Mercedes-Benz Superdome" is just the Superdome.
> 
> I also highly recommend researching the local streets and place names. It just wouldn't be Los Angeles without mentioning the 405 freeway, or Sepulveda Boulevard, etc... Skid Row would be a great place setting for your story, especially since downtown Los Angeles is currently undergoing gentrification.
> 
> A good example is Zola's _L'assomoir_. He uses very specific places and street names in Paris. He even gives you the route characters take when they go from one place to another. The effect is that it actually makes you want to go there, even though you know the story is fiction, it seems like it could have really happened in those places.



I appreciate that, Mark, but that would involve far more research than I'm prepared to do. I'm already struggling enough just writing the thing. As others have said, it's a distant future and I can simply make up street names and locations.


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## midnightpoet (Jul 24, 2013)

There's a book -"Cop Speak" by Tom Philbin, might be online, which might help.  However, even some of the most famous "hardboiled" American writers like Dashiell Hammett invented their own terms.   Read several American crime writers, like Elmore Leonard or Robert Parker.  Even though your novel is in the future,  it may give you a starting point.  I have a similar problem, as I'm working on a spy novel set in Europe - and I've never been there.  

midnightpoet


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Thanks, midnightpoet, I'll look that up. I don't really have the time to go reading crime writers... at least not at the speed I read.


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## Markovich (Jul 24, 2013)

OurJud said:


> I appreciate that, Mark, but that would involve far more research than I'm prepared to do. I'm already struggling enough just writing the thing. As others have said, it's a distant future and I can simply make up street names and locations.



   It probably won't be as difficult as you think. If you want to use LA as your place, hop onto Google Earth or something, and choose a particular area that interests you, such as downtown, Hollywood, Malibu, or where ever (you'd probably be surprised at how much you recognize from TV). Once you've narrowed down an area, then get to know the major streets and important places. For instance, if you researched Dodger Stadium, you'd find that it's built in Chavez Ravine, which has a sordid past and would make a great place for the "wasteland" you're talking about. 

 Sure, there are liberties you can take in a futuristic story, but it has to somehow connect to a real past. I'm not saying that you have to be super detailed, but it's good to drop a few place names here and there. Do that and people will never know you aren't from there.


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## OurJud (Jul 24, 2013)

Thanks again, Mark.

Learning a few street names is, as you say, simple enough, but what I find difficult and daunting with dialogue, especially when talking about street names and locations, is how American people construct their sentences.

If I, as an Englishman, wanted to give directions to a friend, explaining where my new house was, I'd say something like, "OK, once you're on Manchester Road, head for Hyde until you come to the second set of traffic lights where B&Q is. Turn right there onto Mill Lane and take the fourth left. That's Greenfield Street and my house is number 78."

But doing that (not that you're ever likely to need such detail in a work of fiction) as an American, in America, I'd be lost. In films and documentaries, I hear things like "Off 42nd street" but I have no idea what this means. I simply cannot relate to it and therefore struggle to write this kind of dialogue as an American would.

What I'm saying is that if I was asked to give detailed directions, even fictional directions, to this vacant lot behind the stadium that I've described, it would probably stick out a mile as being written by someone trying to _sound_ American. "Head west along Silver Lake Boulevard until you hit the Chevron gas station. Turn right onto Westmoorland Avenue and take the second right onto Addison Street. Hope Stadium is at the end of that road."

That's about as authentic as my knowledge of LA (using google street view) will allow, but I still don't know how someone would use "Off 42nd Street" in a sentence, or what they even mean by it.


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## Skodt (Jul 24, 2013)

Your directions sound fine. I could find your house. Though the end bit we wouldn't give house number. We would say something like third house on the left. It's blue with a red car in front. Also we use GPS we don't do directions haha.


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## Terry D (Jul 24, 2013)

OurJud said:


> but I still don't know how someone would use "Off 42nd Street" in a sentence, or what they even mean by it.



42nd Street is a street name just like any other. Not very original, or charming, but a name none the less. So it would be used just as you used the other names. The directions you wrote using the L.A. streets reads just fine--if you needed that amount of detail.

To say, "My place is on Broadway, just off 42nd Street" means I live on Broadway, near where it crosses 42nd.


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## OurJud (Jul 25, 2013)

Ah! Thanks, Terry


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## Fred (Jul 25, 2013)

Terry D said:


> ...To say, "My place is on Broadway, just off 42nd Street" means I live on Broadway, near where it crosses 42nd.


…but there's perhaps be more drama in being off Broadway… 

OK, OK… sorry… I promise never to do that again!


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## tony0310 (Jul 25, 2013)

This is one of the most interesting threads I have read.  I am British too and my own book is also set in the US (why is it that the British have such a love affair with American culture?).  Anyway, I have set my story in an imagined area of the US.  I deliberately didnt name the State or any major cities and the small town names I used were invented - although places with the same name do exist.  I think we are fortunate in the UK because we have so many American cultural influences in terms of music, movies, tv, books etc that we have little problem switching to an American voice.  There is a difference in language and terminology, of course but that can easily be overcome, particularly if you read your writing out loud.  I agree that the Maple Tree Stadium sounds vaguely Canadian but I am sure they have Maple trees in the US too.  We have an Emirates stadium in the UK but we are not Arabs.  Maple Tree could be the name of a sponsoring company or maybe in the future Canada would be a dominant economic power and may own the stadium.  I thought your extract was ok.  Like the UK, there is no single American voice and dialect and regionalisms abound there as much as they do here.  So the short answer here is stay true to yourself and if it sounds right to you then go with it.  Who knows how an American might speak in, say, 1000 years' time.
If this seriously bothers you then you can always have your story read by an American who could offer criticism and advice about language.


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## OurJud (Jul 25, 2013)

Thanks, Tony 

I look forward to reading an extract from your book should you ever chose to post one. Can you give us a clue what it's about, or even the genre?

For the record, I've dropped Maple Tree Stadium now, in favour of Hope Stadium (an idea I took from a suggestion in KyleColorado's post on the first page)

As for the dialogue, I will just write it as I feel it for now, but I don't want it to distract the reader, making them wonder why my characters are talking like bowler-hatted English gents.


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## tony0310 (Jul 25, 2013)

OurJud said:


> Thanks, Tony
> 
> I look forward to reading an extract from your book should you ever chose to post one. Can you give us a clue what it's about, or even the genre?
> 
> ...



Hi Jud,
My book is a horror story in (I hope) a traditional Gothic vein.  It is set in a country area with woods and lakes and the MC is a good guy who has run away from his past only to find himself in a worse present.  None of the characters he meets are quite what they seem and he becomes a pawn in an end game he could never have imagined.  The funny thing is that I intended to kill him off at then end of the book but I have grown to like him now and I am having second thoughts. lol


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## Kevin (Jul 25, 2013)

Bowler hatted? You guys wear hats indoors?

Everything you need to know about American culture is contained in this absolutely amazing video:

Guy Bowling Backwards - YouTube


The love goes both ways. When I get there, I can't wait to visit 'Ogwarts, Downton Abbey, Larkrise...


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## OurJud (Jul 25, 2013)

Kevin said:


> Bowler hatted? You guys where hats indoors?



 No, just conforming to the American's impression of the English.

And _ELEVEN_ strikes in a row!! _Backwards!_


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## tony0310 (Jul 25, 2013)

Kevin said:


> Bowler hatted? You guys where hats indoors?
> 
> Everything you need to know about American culture is contained in this absolutely amazing video:
> 
> ...


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## tony0310 (Jul 25, 2013)

I don't know what happened to my quote there!  I was just pointing out the difference between 'where' and 'wear'.


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## Kevin (Jul 25, 2013)

oops... thanks tony.

Bond, Potter...All the Stratham movies, they're pretty popular over here. Those are our images, too.


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## tony0310 (Jul 25, 2013)

Kevin said:


> oops... thanks tony.
> 
> Bond, Potter...All the Stratham movies, they're pretty popular over here. Those are our images, too.



Hmmm I never heard of Stratham.  There is an area of London called Streatham but not many movies set there, I believe.  We also have an actor called Jason Statham but he makes as many US movies as British ones.  As far as Potter is concerned, you would probably learn more about England from Beatrix rather than Harry


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## OurJud (Jul 25, 2013)

Kevin said:


> All the Stratham movies, they're pretty popular over here.



Well I suppose he's got to be popular somewhere


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## Markovich (Jul 25, 2013)

OurJud said:


> Thanks again, Mark.
> 
> Learning a few street names is, as you say, simple enough, but what I find difficult and daunting with dialogue, especially when talking about street names and locations, is how American people construct their sentences.
> 
> ...



I don't think you have to be that detailed. My point was that you should at least mention iconic places. If you are writing about the future of a certain city, then people will naturally want to know how things have changed from the present day. For example, if I wrote a story about London set in the future, I might mention that Big Ben was turned into a missile silo or something. You have to connect people to the present day somehow. The city can be an interesting character in itself.

Also, your directions sound fine to me. I don't think our language is really that different, as long as you stick to standard English and not some regional dialect you should be fine. I wouldn't have even known you were British if you hadn't mentioned it.


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