# Confucius



## ShadowZero007 (Jul 29, 2005)

This was previously posted in the short stories section but I think it goes better here 

Below the line is just a copy of the old subject
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Me and my friends decided to try to make flash movies. Were having trouble with flash itself but I think our script is pretty good. Like most flashes its a comedy. Anyway heres the first draft of Script one. Tell me what you think (If anybody out there knows how to use flash help on it would be appreciated) 



Episode 1: Window to a new friend 

Confucius 


Episode#1: Window to a new friend 




*All words in between these symbols means actions* 
[All words within these symbols means tone of voice] 
{All words between these symbols means demeanor} 
&lt;All words within these symbols means the location> =All words within these symbols means descriptions of the location= 


*screen appears that says* 

The Writers 

&lt;In Side a house> 



Allen: *drinking soda* damn I’m out of soda 


INTRO PLAYS 


Nick: *throwing rocks aimlessly* 

Allen: *Drinking Soda* 

*The sound of glass breaking plays* 

Matt: [Dramatic] OUR WINDOW HAS BROKE *hit’s the soda out of Allen’s hand* [Angry] Clean that up 

Allen: *glares at matt* 

Alex: *walks in* We were out of toilet paper so I used one of your movie scripts Matt 

Matt: [Shocked] NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *faints* 

Adrian: [Annoyed] *on the computer* Guys me and my GF are having a romantic evening 

Allen: *out of nowhere another soda appears in his hand* YES *gives a thumps up to the sky* 

*Scene switches to Heaven* 

God: *gives Allen a thumbs up* 

Alex: but its 1:00 P.M 

Adrian: not where she lives 

Nick: Someone moved into the abandoned house 

Allen: nah your just high 

Matt: gets up no he’s right *peaks out the window* 

Allen: Oh wanna go say hi? 

Matt: nah maybe later 


*Screen Appears saying 5 months later appears* 

Allen: now 

Matt: Yeah lets go 

Alex: [EXCITED] IT HAS HAPPNED AT LAST!!!!!!!!!!!! I HAVE MANAGED TO FIX OUR TOILET!!! NO MORE POOPING IN THE HALLWAY FOR US!!!!!! 

Matt: come on lets go we are going to say hi to the neighbors house 

Nick: *faints spontaneously* 

Alex: its its okay I’ll drag him….. 

Allen: lets go 

&lt;outside the house> 

= A mansion is behind them the rest of the neighborhood is nothing but normal houses the house in front of them is very run down= 

Allen: [ scared] Oh no 

=a girl is walking towards them= 

????: Hi!!! Wheres my five dollars 

Allen: [Angry] Damn bet 

&lt;flash back> 

=In a bar= 

Allen: *points to Hitler* I bet you can’t convince him to kill all but his vision of the perfect race if you win I’ll give you five dollars every time we meet 

????: Watch *walks over to Hitler* He slept with your girl *points to a rabbi* 

Hitler: *angry screaming in German* 

&lt;End Flashback> 

&lt;Back outside the house> 

Allen: Uhhh Yvonne Godzilla and Rodan are fighting in your back yard 

????: I’m not stupid 

&lt;????’s back yard> 

=Godzilla and rodan are fighting in her back yard= 

&lt;Outside the writers house> 

Alex: [Confident] watch how its done….Yvonne you cats dead 

????: NOOOOOO 

Allen, Alex, Matt, Nick, Adrian: *run away* 

?????: *standing there* I don’t have a cat 

&lt;Outside the rundown house> 

Allen: *knocks on the door* Hello 

*screen appears that says Confucius* 

Confucius: *running with a huge straw basket on his back with lots of pigs in it* 

*angry mob running after him* 

Lady Leading Mob: GET HIM HE STOLE OUR PIGS 

&lt;Mountain> 

Confucius: *watching scene from a mountain* hahaha bitches take this 

Fake Confucius: *blows up* 

Lady Leading Mob: You cant escape your wife Confucius!!!!! 

Confucius: HA *wandering through the mountains* huh *hears footsteps and yelling* damn I knew I shouldn’t have placed those cryptic clues of my location everywhere *runs to a cave and blocks the entrance with a large rock* well now what *Confucius freezes* 

*A sign appears that says many years nooo many many many many many many many many many many many many MAAAAANYYYYYY years later* 

*the cave has become a old run down house* 

&lt;Inside a rundown house> 

Confucious: *Unfreezes* WHAT THE HELL MY CAVE…has become some kind of wooden lair….. *wandering around his house taking the boards of the door and windows* 

*sign appears that says 5 months later* 

&lt;Outside Confucius’ house> 

=The writers are standing outside= 

Confucius: Opens the door who the f**k are you! 

Allen: Were your neighbors 

Matt: The ones that live there *points to the mansion* 

Alex: So what’s your name 

Nick: **spaced out* 

Adrian: [Angry] *typing on his laptop* SHE WAS CHEATING ON ME!!! I’M CUTTING HER OFF 

Confucius: Neighbors you say housewarming part 4 months ago get lots of presents many toasters…many [SERIOUS] NO PUT HAND IN THERE IT FOR TOAST NOT HANDS *shows us burn marks on his hand* 

Matt: *sneaks up Confucius with a bat and hits him on the head* [Dramatic] HE WILL HELP US BUY NEW WINDOWS!!!!!!!! *maniacal laughter* 

&lt;In the writers Limo> 

=Matts driving, Allen sitting in the passanger seat, nick and adrian first back seat, Alex and the unconscious Confucius in the Second backseat= 

Confucius: [Surprised, Angry] WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!!!! 

Alex: your coming with to get a new window! 

*The car stops* 

Nick: {not zoned out} [Serious] okay Confucius go get a window from that pile over there 

Confucius: But that gate has a sign with a skull on it and 4 dogs guarding the pile 

Matt: just go 

Confucius: NO 

Allen: We’ll get you a new toaster 

Confucius: Toaster AYE! *runs into the gate and gets shocked* 

Allen: *rolls down car windowand tosses a rocket launcher to confucious* use that 

Confucious: *blows up the gate with the rocket launcher grabs one of the windows and begins running from the dogs* HELP HELP SOMEONE PUT BACON IN MY POCKET!!! 

Alex: *laughing* 

Allen: MATT DRIVE 

Matt: *Matt drives the car into Confucious* ……… crap……… 

Dogs: *start knawing on Confucious’ leg* 
Alex: There’s only one way to Fix this…Allen amputate the arm! 

Allen: *pulls out a katana and slashes * 

*a black screen appears that says 4 hours later* 

&lt;In a hospital room> 

=Confucious is lying in the hospital bed his legs are wrapped in bandages his left are is wrapped in bandages his stomach is wrapped in bandages he has a cast around his neck and a bruise on his forehead. The writers are standing around him= 

Confucius: What happened!? 

Alex: Well you were being chased by dogs Matt hit you with the car the dogs started biting your legs Allen cut at your arm 

Allen: My sword got stuck in the bone so we had to yank it out 

Alex: well then Adrian dropped his laptop on your head, Nick collapsed on you and… well I poked you for an hour….. We ran when we heard the cops coming. 

Confucius: where’s my toaster now 

Matt: your not getting one 

Nick: *spinning in a chair* Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee 

Adrian: [Angry] OH SO NOW SHES BREAKING UP WITH ME *throws his laptop at Confucius* 

Allen: but its not all bad we have some good news! 

Confucius: You saved money on car insurance by switching to geico? 

Allen: Hell no! The window we broke wasn’t ours it was yours! 

*Credits Roll*


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## Whende (Jul 29, 2005)

It was hillarious. My favorite part was the toaster part:
"No put hand in there it for toast not hands" it made me think of a caveman.


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