# Hope is like Water



## dannyboy (Sep 2, 2013)

Again I have broken in,
like a tooth ache calling
a tongue,
this house beckons

as I pass it every day
from your home to mine;
it speaks in many voices
this old house

with the sign out front
letting me know
its time is short.
I know about short time.

I understand the way
it sits still,
waiting demolishment;
I can hear its soft final sigh

tinged with regret
as it echoes to the feet
that once ran up and down the stairs.
I enter via a downpipe

every night around twelve,
carrying a bottle of port or some such.
I sit in this silent house and drink.
I feel something in my heart,

like the petals of a magnolia tree,
that slip free, silent
as they fall from the tree
into an emptiness

I had never thought possible.
Sometimes I waken
to the bird calls, quickly leave via the front door
hoping in my absence

you may have telephoned.
I feel hope rising in my chest;
knowing, even as I hurry,
everything is too late.


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## escorial (Sep 2, 2013)

I get the feeling there is more to this that only the author can feel...very deep.


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## Vitaly Ana (Sep 2, 2013)

dannyboy said:


> Again I have broken in,
> like a tooth ache calling
> a tongue, (interesting analogy - liked it! Quite original  )
> this house beckons
> ...



As per usual - excellent stuff db!  :champagne:


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## dannyboy (Sep 2, 2013)

thank you both

Vitaly, That stanza with the deep deep is the one stanza I am not yet happy with.


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## dannyboy (Sep 2, 2013)

redid that stanza.


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## Blade (Sep 2, 2013)

I very much like both the theme and execution of this poem. i have always had a fascination with abandoned buildings and their often long decay between the onset of uselessness and their eventual disappearance. I in fact just finished a short story featuring one of the iconic ruins of my childhood.

As per stanza 7 how about:

like the petals of a magnolia tree,
falling silently
down a deep well
into an emptiness

I think the petal is clearly a light image designed to reflect colour and attract life which has now died and in going downward. Simple contrast works well here.:sneakiness:

I think line 8 could be deleted. I think it breaks the descriptive flow a little.

I very much enjoyed this as it captures the right spirit.:champagne:


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## dannyboy (Sep 3, 2013)

ta blade


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