# Descendant



## SilverMoon (Feb 21, 2017)

I'm
rain drenched -
wet dress to ankle socks.

parents are
 a shut umbrella
leaning on my bedroom sill

they just had smiles for dinner,
deserting me while they laugh
like lions.


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## Nellie (Feb 21, 2017)

Hi Laurie,

Very powerful! I think this verse tells so much:



SilverMoon said:


> Parents are a closed umbrella
> leaning on my bedroom sill,
> watching my braids rot.




Thanks again, for sharing.


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## midnightpoet (Feb 21, 2017)

Liked this, I each of have remembrances of our parents, good and bad - and this does what poetry should do - make you think.  Good job. oh, and I think you meant "they" instead of "the" on the third to last verse.


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## SilverMoon (Feb 21, 2017)

Thank you, both. I do always go for power to provoke thought & feelings, so what a wonderful validation to hear.

Midnight, a big hug for that catch! That was a biggie!


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## sas (Feb 21, 2017)

I admit to not having a firm grasp on first stanza. At first, I thought an orphanage; then babies in war torn areas; then...? No matter, the second stanza is a killer. But, the genius word is "deserting". I assume a pun for "dessert"....damn brilliant.


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## SilverMoon (Feb 22, 2017)

> Originally Posted by *sas*
> 
> admit to not having a firm grasp on first stanza. At first, I thought an orphanage; then babies in war torn areas;
> 
> ...




I have a question about the second stanza?



> "Parents are a *closed*  umbrella."   I think this might not be strong enough re: implication.Of course meaning that they are unavailable, unwilling to protect me. I'm wondering if* "shut" *would be a stronger word? Implying *"shut off"* from love. Family secrets* "shut up". "shutting* *out"* child *"*



Thank you for you impressions. My poems sometimes run epic so it's good to know that I can manage some power in brevity.


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## sas (Feb 22, 2017)

I still kinda like "closed".  "shut" has harsh sound. Closed can mean many things. Hmmm.


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## Nellie (Feb 22, 2017)

sas said:


> I still kinda like "closed".  "shut" has harsh sound. Closed can mean many things. Hmmm.



So can"shut" have many meanings. I like how "shut" sounds in this poem with regards to the subject of the poem.


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## SilverMoon (Feb 22, 2017)

Thank you, both. More :coffee: and time to think.


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## Bard_Daniel (Feb 22, 2017)

SilverMoon said:


> They just had smiles for dinner,
> deserting me while they laugh
> like lions.



Great biting ending to a good poem. Thanks for sharing it with us! : D


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## SilverMoon (Feb 23, 2017)

> Originally Posted by *daniekstj*
> 
> Great biting ending to a good poem.



One good pun! LOL! Thanks. I have a penchant for these type of endings.


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## shedpog329 (Feb 24, 2017)

i can sorta relate to this thanks for sharing


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## SilverMoon (Feb 28, 2017)

> Originally Posted by *shedpog*
> 
> i can sorta relate to this thanks for sharing


Isn't that the truth. Parents can be scary in their unavailability during our crucial developmental years. 
Thank you, shed.


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## Firemajic (Mar 4, 2017)

SilverMoon said:


> I hear,
> “Do not go back there.”
> as if I should subtract
> the furious black fevers
> ...





Dear Laurie... you are the Queen of the complex, without a doubt... This poem told the heartbreaking plight of a lonely child in the middle of an emotional storm, Parents unable or unwilling to shelter and protect ... the fact that they are in your bedroom, leaning casually against your windowsill tells me that they are aware of the storm, a closed umbrella is worthless while closed, yes? Maybe the parents caused the emotional storm and are helpless to do their job of sheltering you from themselves... Yes, you are the Queen of complex... thank you for sharing...


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## SilverMoon (Mar 7, 2017)

Oh, FM. I am sorry to get back to so late. I've been on a kind of little vacation (how's that for being cryptic? LOL) You always "get" me and to be understood is a great gift. Thank you.



> Parents unable or unwilling to shelter and protect ... the fact that they are in your bedroom, leaning casually against your windowsill tells me that they are aware of the storm, a closed umbrella is worthless while closed, yes?



Striking out _unable _in red was my immediate, angry reaction. Not to your apt supposition! But about their unwillingness to  protect. More so, it was about their _will to destroy _a young psyche. And guess who won?!

So glad you had something to say about them watching me through my bedroom window. (Yes. They were worthless umbrellas.) They, watching from "my bedroom" window is about breaking boundaries. Better put, the unspeakable intrusion on my one shelter in a house with mouse traps in every room. Referencing this was the chill up my spine.

Just one of the reasons I love Confessional Poetry is that it is a kind of code. A way to convey what otherwise would be too painful in straight speak.  I'm now thinking of Alice Walker's quote: "_Writing has saved me from the sin and inconvenience of killing." 

_There can be so much therapy gotten from craft. Again, thank you FireMajic...


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