# River currents/Emotions



## Tiashe (Feb 16, 2016)

_Calm on the surface
Deep and powerful under 
Runs freely downstream​_


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## Mesafalcon (Feb 16, 2016)

Interesting. Simple. 

The right length for me...


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## Tiashe (Feb 17, 2016)

Mesafalcon said:


> Interesting. Simple.
> 
> The right length for me...



Thanks for reading. This poem can be either interpreted as a river, or about a person's strong emotions. They may seem emotionless on the outside, but on the inside, they have emotions which are very powerful.


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## Scizologic (Feb 17, 2016)

If your going to paint your visions with words then try to imagine what the reader will see. 

"Calm on the surface" implies flatness.
"Deep and powerful under" is hidden and not seen.
"Runs freely downstream" implies movement with strong waves, that run off in a direction unknown to the reader.


If the vision of the poem had been a crime scene, than what would have been the poems mood and feel then? My point is finally:
Rivers are wet, loud, forceful and voluminous. Emotional people are rarely calm on the surface. 
The poem's picture is not of hidden emotion. It's one of contradiction and contradictions are always false.


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## Tiashe (Feb 17, 2016)

Scizologic said:


> If your going to paint your visions with words then try to imagine what the reader will see.
> 
> "Calm on the surface" implies flatness.
> "Deep and powerful under" is hidden and not seen.
> ...



Not all rivers are as you described. Some are actually still on the surface, but underneath there are strong currents that can surprise you. Also, it is not uncommon for emotional people to be calm. Some people can hide things so well that you won't know their true feelings. Or others can have a blank expression on their face, especially when they are in fear. It helps them because they do not want to reveal to others their scared feelings. They may have terrified emotions on the inside, but you can not easily observe them from the outside can you?

As for the first part of your response, my first line is supposed to imply that. Because that is what makes it seem calm, which is my intended effect. For my second line, I did not intend for what is underneath to be seen. And the last line, if read in the context of a river, then it means it just flows like any other river. But if it is read in the context of emotions, then I get where you are coming from; I might have not been so clear there. In my mind, I suppose I see it as the emotions carrying a person away.


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## Nellie (Feb 17, 2016)

Human emotions are like rivers, they _appear_ to flow smoothly as you previously stated, but underneath is an angry, scared, depressed, or who knows person. Emotions can change moment to moment. Once one hits those rapid currents, life is rough. I like this haiku.


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## LeeC (Feb 17, 2016)

I think you nailed it. Set me to wondering how it would enrich a longer piece ;-)


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## jenthepen (Feb 17, 2016)

A nicely captured truth that encourages thinking. I enjoyed reading this.

I wonder whether _beneath_ might read more naturally than _under w_ithout changing the meaning or syllable count but maybe that's just me?

A very nice haiku.

jen


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## Tiashe (Feb 17, 2016)

Nellie said:


> Human emotions are like rivers, they _appear_ to flow smoothly as you previously stated, but underneath is an angry, scared, depressed, or who knows person. Emotions can change moment to moment. Once one hits those rapid currents, life is rough. I like this haiku.



Very true. Some people are really good at hiding emotions. Thank you 



LeeC said:


> I think you nailed it. Set me to wondering how it would enrich a longer piece ;-)



Aww thanks, I'm glad you thought of it like that. ^_^



jenthepen said:


> A nicely captured truth that encourages thinking. I enjoyed reading this.
> 
> I wonder whether _beneath_ might read more naturally than _under w_ithout changing the meaning or syllable count but maybe that's just me?
> 
> ...



Actually, I didn't think of that. Yes, beneath might be a better word to use. Thank you very much Jen!


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## Scizologic (Feb 18, 2016)

Tiashe said:


> Not all rivers are as you described. Some are actually still on the surface, but underneath there are strong currents that can surprise you. Also, it is not uncommon for emotional people to be calm. Some people can hide things so well that you won't know their true feelings. Or others can have a blank expression on their face, especially when they are in fear. It helps them because they do not want to reveal to others their scared feelings. They may have terrified emotions on the inside, but you can not easily observe them from the outside can you?
> 
> As for the first part of your response, my first line is supposed to imply that. Because that is what makes it seem calm, which is my intended effect. For my second line, I did not intend for what is underneath to be seen. And the last line, if read in the context of a river, then it means it just flows like any other river. But if it is read in the context of emotions, then I get where you are coming from; I might have not been so clear there. In my mind, I suppose I see it as the emotions carrying a person away.



An analogy compares two things and connects or illustrates ideas. 

The two things compared in the poem is, a river and emotion, and the analogy connection is: emotion is like a river - that's a brilliant analogy. I don't see any faults in that analogy. The fault is in the way that analogy is thought of and finally applied. Rivers are huge, loud and impossible to hide. People's emotions are typically rumbling and visually apparent, as strong emotions rise to the surface quickly, and a subset of those who are able to hide their emotions very well, eventually will reach some point where their emotions start to become quite evident, like on the downstream for example - _*this is what your analogy is showing me, that emotions like a river, flow openly and are *_*not hide-able, rivers are noticeable to the very extreme*. 

Say for example, you want to focus through a particular analogy lens, our thoughts, onto a group of those people who have strong emotions and their emotions are hidden, then you need to discover and use analogy material which has the characteristics of both comparability and hide-ability.

I can't think of any analogy that is suitable *in the given case* *of*: those people who have strong emotions and their emotions are rarely displayed? I can't think of one offhand, and that's your job anyway.  :smile:


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## Tiashe (Feb 19, 2016)

Scizologic said:


> Rivers are huge, loud and impossible to hide.



I thought we had come to the conclusion that not all are loud. .-.



Scizologic said:


> People's emotions are typically rumbling and visually apparent, as strong emotions rise to the surface quickly, and a subset of those who are able to hide their emotions very well, eventually will reach some point where their emotions start to become quite evident, like on the downstream for example - _*this is what your analogy is showing me, that emotions like a river, flow openly and are *_*not hide-able, rivers are noticeable to the very extreme*.



No, I have already stated before that some people are actually quite good at hiding their emotions. I recently heard a story from a man who narrated that when he was in high school, there was a girl in his class that used to come to school for one day, then didn't come for two- three weeks at a time. No one knew what was wrong with the girl. However, in time, the girl revealed to this man that her parents drank, and that when she used to come home from school, they would beat her, and so she could not attend school as her bruises would show. She even tried committing suicide. Now, if this girl did not tell him, no one would have known any better, and there could literally be a thousand different reasons in there mind as to why she skipped school. This also shows that the girl must have been in quite an emotional state, but she did not reveal it till she was prompted to. Likewise, a river may also not reveal itself unless it is discovered for what it is.

My point is, you can not always tell what is going on, just like you can not see under a river without investigating it, unless you have some kind of superpower eyes that allows you to see. I know that it is not impossible for one's emotions to show, even if they are very strong, but it's just that others may have to dig deeper than what is on the surface, just like finding out what a river really is like underneath, by entering it.


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## Darkkin (Feb 19, 2016)

Still waters run deep...Simple truth.


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## Nellie (Feb 19, 2016)

Tiashe said:


> I thought we had come to the conclusion that not all are loud. .-.
> 
> 
> My point is, you can not always tell what is going on, just like you can not see under a river without investigating it, unless you have some kind of superpower eyes that allows you to see. I know that it is not impossible for one's emotions to show, even if they are very strong, but it's just that others may have to dig deeper than what is on the surface, just like finding out what a river really is like underneath, by entering it.



Well done!!


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## Firemajic (Feb 21, 2016)

Tiashe said:


> _Calm on the surface
> Deep and powerful under
> Runs freely downstream​_







I like this, and I understand what you are expressing... Now, step out of your comfort zone... tell me something I have not heard before.. you have a fabulous grasp of poetry, and you do NOT lack skill... be confident, color outside of the lines, Tiashe... dare to be different.. unique...


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## bree1433 (Feb 22, 2016)

I think this is really well done. Just wondering though about the title. Do you have an actual title for the poem, because that can add to it.


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## Tiashe (Feb 23, 2016)

Firemajic said:


> I like this, and I understand what you are expressing... Now, step out of your comfort zone... tell me something I have not heard before.. you have a fabulous grasp of poetry, and you do NOT lack skill... be confident, color outside of the lines, Tiashe... dare to be different.. unique...



Is this pressure I feel now? O-O Just kidding, I have learnt by now to just write without really worrying about what others will think, because that is what makes it your own writing. 

And thanks mate



bree1433 said:


> I think this is really well done. Just wondering though about the title. Do you have an actual title for the poem, because that can add to it.



Hmm, I can usually think up titles for my poetry, but for some reason, I couldn't really think of one for this poem.


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