# Where were you when the zombie apocalypse started? - WARNING - violence within



## CroZ (May 31, 2012)

No pics if you're worried. 

These are all true stories which have been happening very recently. I'm assuming most of you have heard about the supposed zombie pandemic, the name being pushed by web users and media alike, as violent stories of canibalism and psychotic murders explode all around the world. I'm not posting any links to this just the cliff notes of the news reports coming in. I'll just explaing the situation below and post these random links on the incidents:
Zombie Apocalypse: More Weird Stories Pouring In | WebProNews
The Zombie Apocalypse is here | News24
'Zombie apocalypse' trend eats through the Web - UPI.com
http://www.examiner.com/article/zombie-apocalypse-nj-incident-causes-swat-team-to-decontaminate-from-gorhttp://www.huliq.com/3257/more-stra...an-stabs-himself-throws-own-intestines-policee

The main incident is being blamed on the spread of a new drug, leading some analysts to believe wide spread use of this drug could lead to a legit zombie outbreak as users lose their minds. One analyst said the new drug nicknamed "bath salts" has ten times the effect of cocaine, with elements of LSD. Users are prone to paranoid illusions and gain "super strength" yup, they said that. One man believed he was fighting off an alien army when he burned someone's house down.

Unless you've been living in a cave you already know that America, and probably the world, is in the beginning stages of a zombie pandemic. The internet is a buzz with claims of on-coming zombie apocalypse. The buzz began when only a short while ago a naked man tackled and ate the face off a homeless man. Police arrived on the scene to find the man eating human flesh, he looked at them and began growling like a monster - witnesses say like a zombie. After the man refused to stop the police opened fire, shooting him 6-12 times. Yes it took up to twelve bullets before the man died.

Since then the internet has exploded with an array of out right disturbing reports of canabilsm and psychotic behavior, much of which is happening in the same state.

First of all, one month before the above attack there was another incident of a naked man trying to bite a passer bye in Miami. Police tased the man but in the end it took 6 officers who beat him with batons while tasing him until he stopped moving. They claimed the man died from a drug over dose. That was the first incident which went much under-reported at the time. Conveniantely this happened around the same time as a chemical leak in a near bye laboratory. Also around this time, in the same area, reports of rabies and cows infected with BSE began popping up. In the same time period a flesh eating virus entered the water supply which killed four people. Hazmat teams have been called in across the city for various chemical leaks, as people begin to come down with mysterious rashes. An entire class of 37 children was evactuated by hazmat teams due to a supposed "pesticide leak."

And here we go with the creepy stuff much of which happened in and around Miami within the same time period:

One day after the homeless man who had his face bitten off is taken to the hospital, a doctor is arrested for dangerous driving. In custody, the docor bashes his own skull off the car door then spits blood at an officer.

Around the time of the first naked zombie one month ago the centre of Disease control places a zombie outbreak contingency plan on their website - as a joke

A man eats the face off a kitten

17 year old man tries to bite girlfriend's ear off

Foreman on construction site bites co-worker

Man stabs himself 50 times, opens his own stomach then throws own intestines at police while continuing to stab himself - police use pepper spray but it has no effect, riot squad is called. It takes the entire squad to subdue him but shows no sign of pain or discomfort.

Random mob attacks escalate in Miami

Rabid bats infect 7 children in Peru

Two die of rabies in the UK within two days - only 27 people have died from rabies there in the last 10 years

Canadian man chops up woman and mails body parts to different parts of the country - doesn't sound like the actions of a zombie but that's one insane incident among many

*So what's new today? 

*Japanese man cuts off and eats his own testicles 

In Maryland a 21 year old student dismembers his room mate and eats his brain


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## Potty (May 31, 2012)

I swear to god, if you're fibbing I'm going to make you wish there was a zombie armageddon. I've been preparing for 3 years for this day!

Edit: I think that, in my excitement for my wish finally coming true, I may have let myself believe this a little too readily. Somehow I think throwing your intestines at people and then still have it take 12 men to drag you down is a little far fetched... I don't care how much coke you would have to had snorted.


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## CroZ (May 31, 2012)

Potty said:


> I swear to god, if you're fibbing I'm going to make you wish there was a zombie armageddon. I've been preparing for 3 years for this day!
> 
> Edit: I think that, in my excitement for my wish finally coming true, I may have let myself believe this a little too readily. Somehow I think throwing your intestines at people and then still have it take 12 men to drag you down is a little far fetched... I don't care how much coke you would have to had snorted.



The links are up there. You can google search each of those ... that is ... if they're still there ... dun dun duuuuuuun.

Actually just try these:
http://www.ksee24.com/news/local/Zombie-Alert-NJ-Man-Throws-Own-Intestines-at-Cops-156010815.htm

http://newsfeed.time.com/2012/05/31/zombie-alert-man-throws-his-own-intestines-at-police/

http://fox4kc.com/2012/05/30/n-j-man-throws-own-intestines-at-police/l


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## Potty (May 31, 2012)

I will wait till I see something on TV. I'm fairly well equipped to take action once the zombiesalready have a grip on England... but just incase I might order a few more arrows come next pay day.


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## CroZ (May 31, 2012)

Potty said:


> *I will wait till I see something on TV. *I'm fairly well equipped to take action once the zombiesalready have a grip on England... but just incase I might order a few more arrows come next pay day.


If zombie movies and video games have taught me anything, the moment hazmat teams show up, you won't be seeing anything on TV.


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## Potty (May 31, 2012)

And that is why real life is never as cool as things you see on TV.


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## CroZ (May 31, 2012)

Potty said:


> And that is why real life is never as cool as things you see on TV.



I just went out for a smoke, heard some groaning outside and immediately ran back inside. Only then I realised it was my roomate groaning in his sleep.

I don't know about you but you'll find me eating vedge, working on my cardio, and hiding behind the nearest fat kid. Don't worry about me, I fed him some steaks so he'll smell the nicest. If only I didn't have this damn limp leg. It's itchy. So itchy ... itchy itchy, tastey tastey.


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## Potty (May 31, 2012)

Well I don't live in the city and my nearest nextdoorwordican'tspell is a good 3 miles away. Might break out the home made laser trip wire alarms tomorrow for good measure. (I'm not kidding by the way, I've a foot locker full of survival supplies. I'm only one Ipod payment away from being able to afford a gun case and qualifying for a shot gun... for now I will have to make do with the bow and arrow and sword.)


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## CroZ (May 31, 2012)

another one. Mother kills 3 week old son and eats his brain
Mother beheads infant son, eats part of brain - Emirates 24/7


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## Kyle R (May 31, 2012)

[video=youtube;nhfkYQ9UfiM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhfkYQ9UfiM[/video]

*"Turns normal people into monsters that posess this superhuman strength and no ability to feel pain."*

That's _literally_ word for word what the reporter said.

I've taken LSD. Six tabs of it, at once. At no point did I ever develop superhuman strength or turn into a human flesh-eating monster.

Doesn't sound like LSD to me! Sounds more like, something else.

My weapons of choice are one double-barrel shot gun, and an aluminum baseball bat (endless ammo, no need to reload). Come get some, ya Zombie bastards!


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## Potty (May 31, 2012)

I would quite like to get my hands on some tonfa batons.


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## CroZ (May 31, 2012)

google trends top 20:

1.john edwards2.*zombie apocalypse*3.chagas disease4.spelling bee5.*bath salts*6.martin short7.defense of marriage ...8.matt kemp9.kathie lee gifford10.nicklas lidstrom11.nba mock draft 201212.rajon rondo1*3.**cannibal*14.spacex15.pleurisy16.hatfield17.john legend18.*miami news*19.so you think you can...20.snow white and the h...


My favourite quote out of all this:
*"Believe it or not, we have a zombie apocalypse contingency plan," said Governor Scott. "It's pretty fucking awesome."*


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## Kyle R (Jun 1, 2012)

I just saw the photograph of the homeless man (who was once an educated scholar) after his face had been eaten off. I thought it would freak me out or disgust me, but it instead made me feel very sad for him.

It's on google if you wish to find it. Just go through google images. Very gruesome, I must say. I don't recommend searching for it if you're squeamish.

Also there's an internet rumor spreading about a virus called LQP-79. It originates from an article that's clearly faked. (uses language such as "the virus affects your brain waves to make you hungry for human flesh". Oh, sure. Good scientific language there. *rolls eyes*

If you wish to see the fake article that started all the rumors, click here (but be warned again, there is a small version of the actual photograph of the victim on it): http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/166089_3206202562548_1490697044_32076341_350826471_n.jpg


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## squidtender (Jun 1, 2012)

KyleColorado said:


> [video=youtube;nhfkYQ9UfiM]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhfkYQ9UfiM[/video]
> 
> *"Turns normal people into monsters that posess this superhuman strength and no ability to feel pain."*
> 
> ...



The most I ever took was 5 microdots at once, and I only wanted to sit there and watch the pretty colors. I've already got a pump shotgun, hundreds of rounds and a samurai sword that I inherited from my grandpa. PLUS! I have the official zombie handbook and 37 years of stored up, bad one-liners just waiting for my first kill. I'm ready, b*tches


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## CroZ (Jun 1, 2012)

The madness continues as today a Swedish man cuts off his wife's lips and eats them
Professor cuts off wife's lips, eats them | News24

That's two more new stories today, including the one about the man who dismembered his room mate and ate his brain


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## CroZ (Jun 1, 2012)

Oh snap, found another one from the end of april. 19 year old girl bites dog and mother.
Woman 'bites dog and mother': Analise J. Garner, 19, in drunken savage attack at family home | Mail Online


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## Kevin (Jun 1, 2012)

Hah! junior says to me, re the miami dude, that they shot him before they knew if he was one or not. And then he says, unless the victim 'turns'...


Does anyone remember the old "Creepy", "Eerie" mags? They had a story in there called "Jackass". The premise was that there was this drug out on the streets of London (late victorian?) the the desperate/destitute would inject. They would be transformed into these super-human demon-like creatures raping and murdering the rich. Then they would die .  They called these attacks "jackassing".


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## Colin Palfrey (Jun 3, 2012)

It's funny I see this thread today, as both myself and my brother have spent the last week talking about this.  There certainly is a very definite increase in zombie'esque attacks at the moment.  I'm both armed to the teeth and kinda hoping this won't fade away.  Sean of The Dead has left my with both an urge to wield a baseball bat of righteous retribution, and a serious lack of zombies. 

Inside every writer there is a half craze barbarian that just wants to wail on zombies with a broadsword.  To stab a vampire in the eye with a pen and shout a horribly cliched line about which is mightiest now then, eh? eh?

Due to the temporary lack of the aforementioned zombies we write books...and bide our time!


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## Winston (Jun 3, 2012)

There will be a tipping point.  Then, only two words will matter:

*Head shot.:ChainGunSmiley:*


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## Colin Palfrey (Jun 3, 2012)

"If we hole up I want to be somewhere familiar, I want to know where the exits are, and I want to be allowed to smoke."

I had wondered why the like button was never used.  I clicked it and a little heart has appeared...and now I know!  
Face-palm of shame.


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## Kyle R (Jun 6, 2012)

So, after the Miami Face-Eater, a man has gone on youtube, with a friend filming him as he runs around the streets of Miami with a hidden microphone, fake blood on his face and shirt, and a necktie wrapped around his forehead (lol), making groaning and growling noises.

The result? Well, see for yourself. Try not to pee your pants from laughter!

[video=youtube;4awVqRr1eCo]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4awVqRr1eCo[/video]

Insensitive? Maybe. But the prank itself was hilarious.. Until he met his unfortunate end at the end of the video. Lol


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## Sunny (Jun 6, 2012)

KyleColorado said:


> So, after the Miami Face-Eater, a man has gone on youtube, with a friend filming him as he runs around the streets of Miami with a hidden microphone, fake blood on his face and shirt, and a necktie wrapped around his forehead (lol), making groaning and growling noises.
> 
> The result? Well, see for yourself. Try not to pee your pants from laughter!
> 
> ...


Oh no. Is it wrong that I couldn't stop laughing at that? His noises were so ridiculous that I almost did pee my pants from laughing.

He was on a bicycle at one point!!!! ha ha. And, he snarled at a shoe. lol

He scared people away as though he were loaded with machine guns! I guess people are terrified of crazies in general, now add in the threat of crazy _zombies_, and heck - I'd be running away too. Who am I kidding, I'd be running away if it were a normal everyday guy dressed in his suit just asking me what the time was. ha ha


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## Terry D (Jun 6, 2012)

I think the end was the funniest part.  I wish it had shown him getting the a**kicking he earned.


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## KangTheMad (Jun 6, 2012)

WWL - AM870 | FM105.3 | News | Talk | Sports - Louisiana Man Accused Of Biting ''a Chunk Of The Victim's Face Off''

It is spreading.


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## Nemesis (Jun 12, 2012)

I'm going to take over a Walmart super center, block off the doors, make a rope ladder so noninfected people can climb up to the roof (only when we want them too) plant an indoor garden to grow our own food when the grocery side runs out. but this needs to be done way up north so the bastards will freeze in the winter! (assuming we are going off of the they are really walking corpses idea) also walmarts up north (at least in upper michigan) have weapons and bullets in stock =)


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## Winston (Jun 15, 2012)

Noxicity said:


> I'm going to take over a Walmart super center, block off the doors, make a rope ladder so noninfected people can climb up to the roof (only when we want them too) plant an indoor garden to grow our own food when the grocery side runs out. but this needs to be done way up north so the bastards will freeze in the winter! (assuming we are going off of the they are really walking corpses idea) also walmarts up north (at least in upper michigan) have weapons and bullets in stock =)



You have thought this through WAY too well.

I'm assuming the level of detail you provided was due to the research you gleaned for a book idea?

*gulp*


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## Kyle R (Jun 15, 2012)

Noxicity said:


> I'm going to take over a Walmart super center, block off the doors, make a rope ladder so noninfected people can climb up to the roof (only when we want them too) plant an indoor garden to grow our own food when the grocery side runs out. but this needs to be done way up north so the bastards will freeze in the winter! (assuming we are going off of the they are really walking corpses idea) also walmarts up north (at least in upper michigan) have weapons and bullets in stock =)



Watch _Dawn of the Dead (2004)_ if you haven't already. Then read _Lord of the Flies - William Golding_ (again, if you haven't already). Also watch _Quarantine (2008)_. Combine the three and that's likely what will happen.

The shopping mall / supermart store _seems_ like a good idea, until you're trapped in it and the group members begin to turn on each other in hostility, anxiety, frustration.. you name it, it'll show up! 

And the zombies outside will be moaning and banging on the walls and glass nonstop, 24/7. It'll start to drive everyone nuts.

Someone will eventually say "I can't take it anymore! I have to get out of here! Who's with me?" then they'll take a small group and some of your weapons and leave. And they will screw up and some of them will get eaten and a few zombies will get INTO THE WALMART and SCATTER LIKE ROACHES.. 

Then someone will get BITTEn while fighting off the intruders!.. And once one person gets infected, it'll spread through the group like wildfire, until it's only you and your best friend left, running for your lives while your former friends stagger after you, moaning with dead fish eyes.

Then you're suddenly not liking WalMart anymore.


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## wyf (Jun 15, 2012)

I always thought 28 days later was the most realistic scenario.


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## wyf (Jun 15, 2012)

Terry D said:


> I wish it had shown him getting the a**kicking he earned.




This. Definfitely. I have a most unladylike fascination for violence.


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## Nemesis (Jun 15, 2012)

If I hear any talk of mutiny I will throw them over board, if you get my drift


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## Dave Watson (Jun 24, 2012)

I think it's time to re-read the Zombie Survival Guide and my collection of Walking Dead comics. Knowledge is power, people! Especially if you also have a crowbar, a sniper rifle and a silenced 9mm Berretta.  

Bring it on, you undead fools!


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## Penwillz (Jun 24, 2012)

Noooooooooooi big guns make noise bro sniper bad idea. Zombies are dumb but they swarm anything that makes noise, even far away maybe put a silencer on it as well. No sitting around either. What I'd need are firecrackers for diversion, a silenced pistol, an alluminum bat (main weapon), and maybe a shotgun for last resort. What's needed is to find civilization! Make a colony with a baracade and find a way to erase those creepy bastards from existance!


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## Kyle R (Jun 24, 2012)

This is my favorite zombie shooter game. (free) http://armorgames.com/files/games/the-last-stand-2-1443.swf 

Play it, or the zombies will get you!

You build a barricade and search for supplies, survivors, and weapons in the daytime. At night the zombies come out and you must defend your barricade before they tear it down and eat you! Lock and load!


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## Crawfordnator (Jun 25, 2012)

A couple incidents sound like a zombie attack. But zombies don't stab themselves, cut their testicles off or are able to mail stuff. Just go and attack people. At least, that's all they do in the movies and video games...


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