# Secret Sparrow



## Firemajic (Aug 5, 2016)

_SSssshhh listen! Weeping Sparrow whispers secrets
sibilant sounds sigh, mourning wasted wings
wounded and shattered
praying pathetic prayers, offering empty promises
that never rise above the sidewalk cracks

Dusty disillusioned Sparrow 
spinning on splintered wounded wings
helpless to help the helpless
she weeps as she sweeps
seeking, searching for that illusion she seeks

Dull eyes sweep the city of  the damned
searching for redemption
sadly, the redeemer has deserted the desperate
sorrow has shackled the spinning Sparrow
earthbound, she was NEVER meant to fly
_


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## LeeC (Aug 5, 2016)

Says a lot about life to me ;-)


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## Galivanting (Aug 6, 2016)

should sparrow be capitalized in the last stanza or is that intentionally deviating from the rest. 

quite like this, the punctuation felt a bit odd or erratic but thats just a thing i obsess over

great alliteration 

look forward to the next


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## Sonata (Aug 6, 2016)

Even though sometimes I do not quite understand what you mean when just reading, by reading your work out loud brings understanding to me.  Thank you.


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## Nellie (Aug 6, 2016)

Well, this definitely isn't the song sparrow but sounds more like a swamp sparrow, mourning her life that's been wasted by the broken wings, broken promises. Thanks for letting us in.


Great alliteration.


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## SilverMoon (Aug 6, 2016)

Juls, for me there's always something "woodsy" about your work. I feel like I'm wandering the woods at night where anything could jump out at me. This certainly can stir one and that I always am.



> _sorrow has shackled the spinning sparrow
> earthbound, she was NEVER meant to fly_



Yes, I am.


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## Firemajic (Aug 8, 2016)

LeeC said:


> Says a lot about life to me ;-)




Unfortunately, yes..... I guess it does... Thank you, Lee...

Galivanting, yes, Sparrow should be capitalized... and I fixed it, thank you.. I try NOT to use any punctuation in my poetry, using line breaks instead, but sometimes I need a comma to separate a pairing of words... thank you so much for your comments...

Sonata, thank you for reading and commenting... 

Nellie, you nailed it! You always get what I try to express, and that is a fabulous thing... thank you..

SilverMoon, I always enjoy reading your comments, they intrigue me... thank you...

Thank you to those who clicked "LIKE"... I appreciate it..


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## Bard_Daniel (Aug 9, 2016)

Deep and revealing. 

*"*_*Dull eyes sweep the city of  the damned
searching for redemption"*

_I really liked this part. 

Thanks for sharing Julia!


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## Firemajic (Aug 10, 2016)

Thank you for reading and commenting, Daniel... I appreciate it..


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## Bruno Spatola (Aug 10, 2016)

Wow, that was emotive. A secret birdsong to all the forgotten souls of Earth.

You have a very unique way with words; there's a sympathetic edge of mania to it, as if written while your heart was beating fast and your mind whirled with thought.

Very good. I loved it.

Favourite line: 

"...offering empty promises,
that never rise above the sidewalk cracks."

Deeeeeep.


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## Firemajic (Aug 11, 2016)

Thank you Bruno, your comments are fabulous... I appreciate..


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## jenthepen (Aug 11, 2016)

Wow, you made that sparrow fly with your words. Sometimes, it's easier to look back with sadness and miss the bright future shining before us. Your poetry carries so many hidden messages - that little sparrow just needs to look deeper into what your muse is telling her. 

As ever, your words are magical to me.

jen


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## Firemajic (Aug 12, 2016)

jen, you ability to see the secrets within my poetry is astounding, and your comments leave me speechless with admiration... Thank you, Dark Twin... I heard what you said and I understand what you did NOT say...


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## escorial (Aug 20, 2017)

fantastic piece


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## Firemajic (Aug 22, 2017)

Thank you, Escorial... I really enjoyed writing this and playing with the words... I am glad you enjoyed reading this poem...


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## escorial (Aug 22, 2017)

I like it when animals are used in a positive way..the theme was bleak but the metaphor and the meaning came through with the use of the sparrow..cool


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## Firemajic (Aug 22, 2017)

escorial said:


> I like it when animals are used in a positive way..the theme was bleak but the metaphor and the meaning came through with the use of the sparrow..cool




Escorial, when I write a metaphor, it is usually quite by accident... hummmm, maybe that is the secret to writing a metaphor... just let It happen..


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## escorial (Aug 22, 2017)

There is metaphor and I can't think of the other word which means something very similar..either one I reckon can be a subconscious afterthought..why Choose a sparrow...it could mean many different things to other people..but I felt it was integral to the piece and not poetic licence...one could read too much into it and over think such things but to me when a piece of writing like this work will always appeal to me..cheers juls..


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## Firemajic (Aug 22, 2017)

Simile ... a simile is like a metaphor.... maybe you were thinking of that.. 
Why a Sparrow? Because Sparrows are common, drab, overlooked birds... they are vagabonds, not beautiful, like a Thrush or a Blue Bird.... they are almost invisible... which is a crucial point in this poem...


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## escorial (Aug 22, 2017)

Totally get that..excellent


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## urbandekay (Aug 22, 2017)

Nice allegory


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## Firemajic (Aug 22, 2017)

urbandekay said:


> Nice allegory




Thank you....another happy accident...


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## Darren White (Aug 23, 2017)

I only see this little gem now. Love the alliteration (there is a lot of it)
Did you know the sparrow is quite a symbolic little bird? Associated with love (Greek mythology) and death?


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## CrimsonAngel223 (Aug 23, 2017)

So many S's though. It's ssssizzzzlllllinnnggg.


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