# Writer needs company



## Lara Cox (Sep 8, 2014)

Hi I'm Lara,

I've been writing for many years, finally got representation at the end of last year, and am now currently trying to process my first few rejections from publishers. I'm finding it hard and would welcome any company or wisdom from other writers. Even though I know this is early days I'm already slipping into feelings of pessimism. How do you manage your expectations realistically as well as moving forwards with faith? Looking at stats, reading blogs relating to publishing seems paints such a bleak picture and it also makes you feel lonely. One of the troubles of being an aspiring author is there is often nobody around to share your dreams and consequently disappointments with. if this rings with anyone else, let me know.


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## MissTerious (Sep 8, 2014)

I'm only 15, and writing is my hobby, but I didn't want to just read it and not reply. I really really hope you get a good response soon, but if not, just remember that all writers went through something similar - apparently Harry Potter was rejected 12 times! Don't give up on your dreams.


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## Lara Cox (Sep 8, 2014)

Hello MissTerious. I'm so impressed that you read a forum such as this at your age. You must be really serious and thank you for your kind response and taking the trouble to reply. I hope so too. My book is actually aimed at your age group. It's a teen novel. I'm addicted to the young adult genre. 
I've got a good agent so i've got a shot. And you're right about not giving up on your dreams, it gets harder not to as you get older but it's no less important.


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## MissTerious (Sep 8, 2014)

It's no trouble. 
Well, if you ever get your book published, be sure to write a post with it's name! I would absolutely love to read it, though I read a lot of genres, from YA to memoirs. 
I'm sure it does get harder as you get older and things become more serious, but hopefully you'll believe in yourself long enough for something to happen!  I'm sure something will come along, even if it takes a little while.


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## Terry D (Sep 8, 2014)

Lara Cox said:


> Hi I'm Lara,
> 
> I've been writing for many years, finally got representation at the end of last year, and am now currently trying to process my first few rejections from publishers. I'm finding it hard and would welcome any company or wisdom from other writers. Even though I know this is early days I'm already slipping into feelings of pessimism. How do you manage your expectations realistically as well as moving forwards with faith? Looking at stats, reading blogs relating to publishing seems paints such a bleak picture and it also makes you feel lonely. One of the troubles of being an aspiring author is there is often nobody around to share your dreams and consequently disappointments with. if this rings with anyone else, let me know.



Sometimes it's just a matter of perspective; many authors here would be overjoyed simply to find an agent willing to take on their work, so, in that respect, you are well ahead of the game. Congratulations!


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## aj47 (Sep 8, 2014)

Welcome to the community.  We have writers of varying levels, genres, styles and ambitions.  I understand how you could feel pessimistic.  It's easy to say "no" and a "yes" is harder.  Even when you log in somewhere, if your password is wrong, it tells you right away but when it's right, it takes a bit to load. 

Don't be discouraged.

In the meanwhile, feel free to join our writing discussions and read our work (and leave feedback).  Once you've made ten posts, you'll be able to share your work with us.  I'm looking forward to that.


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## Nickleby (Sep 8, 2014)

I haven't gotten anything published yet, but it seems to me there are two things you need. One is luck, and you can't do anything about that. The other is perseverence. You have to feel that a given piece will get published sooner or later, it's just a matter of finding the right venue at the right time (again, the luck factor). Once you stop sending it out and throw it in the trunk, you guarantee it won't be published.

Welcome to Writing Forums. Contact a staff member if you have questions or concerns.


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## Fivetide (Sep 8, 2014)

Hi I'm totally new here as well, I have yet to venture down the path of attempting to get published. But like you I have browsed many forums and articles on the subject and quite frankly it a depressing read. I guess the way I’m managing my expectations of the future is quite simple. If my writing only leaves an insight of me to my family and their children, then that would be a great achievement in its self. Beyond that I keep my options open and if others read my stories then that would be the icing on the cake. Also I believe I’m quite pragmatic in my outlook, I’ll write and hopefully get some feedback, if the underlying trend is towards the negative , then I’ll write solely for my own enjoyment.
Remember; ”_Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm_”. *Ralf Waldo Emerson*


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## TKent (Sep 8, 2014)

Lara,

Welcome to the forum! If you get involved, you may not get published any faster but you will NOT be lonely  I'm new to writing but there are many experienced and published writers on this site who can probably relate.  And lots of newbies who will be so encouraged that you have an agent! Based on what I read on forums / twitter, etc., that is a huge accomplishment! 

And MissTerious, Welcome to you too! Nice having the perspectives of all ages on this site. And especially ones who are as positive and encouraging as you are!



MissTerious said:


> I'm only 15, and writing is my hobby, but I didn't want to just read it and not reply. I really really hope you get a good response soon, but if not, just remember that all writers went through something similar - apparently Harry Potter was rejected 12 times! Don't give up on your dreams.


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## InstituteMan (Sep 8, 2014)

Hi, Lara!

If you have representation, you have already progressed further than most, so you have some talent and likely more than a little persistence. If you keep those two traits I expect you will be fine.

As for how I manage expectations, I am most definitely keeping my day job. I am also assuming that writing likely won't work for me professionally, so I am only writing things that are fun on some level for me so that I at least have a good time.

On a final note, my day job is my own business (a law firm). Starting any business -- and writing professionally is certainly a business -- takes years and years to really get momentum. Once I got my first few clients and did a good jobs or them, I started to get referrals, but getting that first client is *hard*. Maybe I am only seeing what I want to see in the publishing industry, but it seems like the first contract is the hardest to get, and from there even modest success begets more opportunities and, hence, more success.

Check in here for encouragement and the occasional giggle, keep working at it but don't worry overmuch, and you'll be fine. Welcome aboard!


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## Lara Cox (Sep 9, 2014)

Hi Terry D,

Thank you. And yes you're right - it's all about perspective. And believe me I was overjoyed when I was offered representation. It's great to know that somebody believes in your work. But it's been a vigorous year of re-writing with a view to publication and you can't help the goal posts shifting in your mind. How is your book doing? I don't have a Kindle. Is your book available as an ebook? Did you self publish? I self published my first book which got through to a publishers and was then dropped but I don't think I sold a single one. But I didn't really have a clue what to do.


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## Lara Cox (Sep 9, 2014)

Hi Institute Man,

Seems to me you've pretty much got the measure of it. I do believe statistically that that first contract (debut authors) is the hardest to obtain and probably comparable  to your experience gaining that first client. If I ever need a lawyer than I imagine I would want to know for sure I was going to get the best representation for my money and it would take a certain kind of strength and instinct to go with someone new or a new firm that's untested. Do you remember that first client?

Running your own business sounds great to me. I have an entrepreneurial spirit and would love to be able to run my own business but am crap at everything more or less apart from writing and teaching (writing and drama) which is what I do for my day job. And no, I didn't plan to give up teaching and retire once I got my agent - although there is a fear as time shrinks in proportion to your family/work commitments that there just isn't the time to write that you need. I gave my twenties to writing, and didn't have to worry about it. it's when you feel like your aspirations impact on others that it becomes increasingly difficult to justify. 

It's great to be on this site - i should have done it a long time ago and be in touch with other writers who think about this kind of stuff.


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## Lara Cox (Sep 9, 2014)

Thank you TKent,

I already feel better for having had a few responses and being in touch with people who share my passion.


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## Lara Cox (Sep 9, 2014)

Thank you, Nickleby. Will do.


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## MysticalMind (Sep 9, 2014)

I suppose it must be really hard. Then again I probably don't understand. I personally write because I like to write as it's a form of escapism for me. I don't write with the intention of becoming a published author, however nice that may be. I write for myself first. If others happen to stumble upon my work and enjoy it that's a bonus. Anyhow, welcome to the forum. I'm quite the pessimist myself, so I'm not expecting any nice reviews for the piece I just submitted here.


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## Pandora (Sep 9, 2014)

Hey Lara, you received wonderful advice already I'll just add keep the faith it brings peace of mind, welcome to the fun and learning!


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## InstituteMan (Sep 9, 2014)

Lara Cox said:


> Hi Institute Man,
> . . .
> 
> Do you remember that first client?



Yep, I remember my first client after starting my own firm. And the second. And the third. Etc. 

I am actually relatively new to having my very own firm, but I was a partner with a larger firm before I struck out on my own. That gave me an advantage as a lawyer most aspiring writers just don't have: I had a proven pedigree of success in my field (it was still hard getting started, though -- I can't imagine starting my own shop without the prior experience and reputation). I have actually gotten legal work in the past year because of someone remembering work I did 10 or so years ago for someone else. That's the kind of time frame required to really get established in a field, I think. Instant successes only look like instant successes from the outside.


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## Kieran S (Sep 9, 2014)

I'm reading Stephen King's 'On Writing' at the moment and he talks about rejection almost as a badge of honour. He says he used to impale his rejection slips on a nail in his bedroom and after a while his mother had to buy him a longer nail.

Ditto for Don McLean - his first album was rejected 72 times before a record company agreed to produce it. I saw him interviewed once, and he said being rejected is a very personal thing. To paraphrase, 'It's not like selling knives door-to-door. If someone doesn't want to buy your knives, that's fine. It just means they think your knives stink. But if someone rejects your songs, it means they think _you _stink!'

He said such rejection would have killed him but he didn't want to die so young. So, he used it to grow (again I'm paraphrasing here), and like a tree the older he got the tougher his bark became.

Writing is lonely but an online community like this one is great for helping out - welcome!


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## Megookin (Sep 11, 2014)

Lara, it depends on what your ultimate goal is.  If you have an agent, you evidently hope to one day to see your efforts in ink and paper form.  To this end, you will meet with a lot of rejection simply because you are trying to get into a club that likes to be exclusive.  For this, you have to approach the front doors with the expectation of being turned away by the gatekeeper over and over again with the hopes of one day finding the door unguarded to gain access.  

I have a couple e-books because for me getting the story out there was more important than to have the physical book to hold in my hands.  But, I initially approached it for the physical side of having something that could  be handed down to my grandchildren.  After many canned rejections from many agents, I e-published my first book.  My second book, I didn't even offer to agents and avoided the dance of rejection.


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