# Allen



## Vitaly Ana (Oct 12, 2013)

From a lone tree on top of Stone Hill
moaned a rope hanging from a branch.

A child sung; his Dad's Michelin swung
with the Hurricane’s first gale and

glance. The squall eyed the town's silent
pride; laughed in howled disguise.

When it was a category one, not a Texan
left. By Sunday it was a category five.


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## Kevin (Oct 13, 2013)

sounds like dread ; the noises foreshadow. Eerie. No one listens.


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## Vitaly Ana (Oct 13, 2013)

Thanks Kevin. Thanks - I was going for an eerie effect. This was very loosely based on Hurricane Allen which was a category five storm that hit the US-Mexico border. It had sustained winds of over 190 mph making it one of the strongest storms in US History. 

The idea for the poem stemmed from a children's show I was watching with my son. In that show, a child was happily swinging on a tree tire when they were knocked off and, subsequently ended up rolling down a hill (a cautionary tale of sorts I suppose). Anyways merge that with the imagery of a storm that had just passed my home and, the result is this eerie poetic version of a cautionary tale. 

I wanted to add some truth to the piece, hence Hurricane Allen - a real CAT 5 storm from way back in 1980.

Thanks for reading!


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## Kevin (Oct 13, 2013)

I figured that (1980? call me old fashioned, but storms are women or women are storms *runs for it* ), but it reminded me of that other Allen; Poe.


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## Sailwa (Oct 13, 2013)

I envy the grasp you have on structure. You made the words hang in the air, which built the eery effect i believe you was intending. Nicely done. I think some more direct phrasing could be useful though to give it more impact. I liked the poem but i felt a bit of a disconnect due to some of the wording. In the same way you read a poem from a by-gone era which you can still appreciate but that doesn't have the same realism and affect as a modern piece. That's not a slight on your work at all, i understand that may have been an intended style. Just trying to be honest with you, impressed on the whole though.


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