# The Phoenix Project



## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 for the prologue of the published novel.  

Apparently I need to have a FAQ because some questions are always going to be asked, so here it is:
*
FAQ*

_What is this? A book?_

It used to be about sixty percent of the first book, but I can’t post that much of it because Amazon would kill me! I hope you can settle for the Prologue and first chapter of the first novel, ‘_The Phoenix Project_’, followed by the first chapter of the second novel in the series, ‘_Dark Horizon_’.

_Do you mean that this is a series?_

Yes, there are seven books in the series. The series is called ‘_The Phoenix Chronicles_’. As of right now books one and two are published. Book three is done and book four is being written........right now!

_Can I offer criticism?_

Absolutely! But this is something that I say about writers’ forums which is purely my personal opinion: this is a writers’ forum. It isn’t a proofreaders’ forum. It isn’t an editors’ forum. Especially in this thread, because all of that has already been done. So if you want to offer your opinions on characters, plotlines, dialogue, etc. go right ahead.

_So you aren’t looking for a proofread?_

No.

_You aren’t looking for an edit?_

No.

_Watch out! I’m going to give you a critique of your work and by GOD it’s going to hurt!_

Okay! Don’t hold back!

I will put any other questions and answers up if I think of any.


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## mockingbird

Okay Powerskris, I would've started by showing dead ships in space orbiting the planet with the enemy armada amassing for the final strike. Then describe the 2 characters before speaking, and where they are, showing their terror of the situation, aside from that, it's a good piece of scifi writing.


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## powerskris

*Thank-you, Mockingbird!*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Malakite

I have to agree with you powerskris. I am not an avid sci fi reader. In fact I was not going to read it the moment I heard anything futuristic, but as you said it got me to ask questions. As a prologue that is exactly what you want. You want to jump right into the action and hook your reader. I'm surprised and very much impressed. I would like to comment on the use of firestorm, and then in the next sentence hell storm. I would vary the description here maybe something like "a blinding beam of destructive light" or anything to describe the fury of the energy besides another storm. Granted, I'm nit picking but I assumed that's why we're all here. We want the best version of our story, and you definitely have me interested despite not reading science fiction. Great plot structure, and I look forward to seeing equally as appealing character development.


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## The Jaded

The discussion about who presses the button could see a little work. It took me four readings to realize that they weren't actually arguing over the button press, but over blame for use of the superweapon.

Also, I agree, firestorm isn't the appropriate word, perhaps "cascade" or "bloom" would fit that slot. If it were me, I would turn 

_Without any further warning, it  belched a great firestorm of emerald energy at the enemy armada. The  deepest black of night turned into a blinding hell storm. _

into 

_Still, the armada didn't take notice of the weapon until it  belched a cascade of emerald energy, headed right for the oncoming ships. The  deepest black of night shriveled at the advance of the blinding hell storm. _

Or something like that. That's just my first take on that bit. Obviously, there are a lot of ways to do it.

Beyond those two parts, though, it's quite good. Definitely makes me wonder what happened to get to this point - and what happened after.


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## fcbkid15

This is pretty good, it looks like it has a lot of potential. I personally wouldn't mind keeping up with this and reading it, so hopefully you update it, write more, not really sure what you plan to do with it though. There were a few thing, however, that I was confused about. Nothing major, but a few things. It wasn't really clear were the characters were in this prologue. Were they on a ship? A space station? Fighters? So you might wanna go back and make that more clear. Also, what the weapon's purpose was. It was blowing up a planet, thats what I got out of it. But why was it? You'll probably go into this later in your novel, but either than that it was pretty good! So bravo powerskris! Good job, and please take a look at my stuff. I just have a prologue, like this. Theres also a revolutionary war soldier letter I did for fun in the crime/thriller/general fiction. But anyways, this was really good, so hopefully you keep doing this, I like it.


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## powerskris

*Thanks, everybody!*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## TheFuhrer02

This is actually good! You got me hooked with the coalition-alliance tension, esp. on the Maria-Coalition General conversation. I saw a few points that I think are worth mentioning:



> “Good. Would you like a coffee?”



Perhaps a _cup_ of coffee?



> He even threatened that the INN would have a field day with our act of vandalism.



Cliche expression twice said just a few sentences apart. I felt it was already verging on redundant.

Nonetheless, I really liked this chapter. I've nothing else to say because the story just hooked me, and I just kept on reading. X\'D

Alright, moving on the chapter 2!


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## TheFuhrer02

powerskris said:


> Within the purview of the narrator, you are absolutely correct. However, this is a character talking and I have to write more in tune with what they would say. Ask yourself if someone would say: "Would you like a beer?" or would they say "Would you like a can of beer?" As a result, I have to have them speak as they would in everyday conversation as opposed to being more grammatically correct.


 
Intriguing. Whenever I ask a friend if he wants some coffee, I always ask with "Would you like a cup of coffee?" or "Would you like some coffee?" This is colloquial, everyday talks. But sure, whatever floats your boat.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*All the new stuff!*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter One Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## ThreadWhisperer

First of all a note that I am not typically a reader of stories based in space so *please* keep that in mind as you read below.

The new prologue is alright but it doesn't impress a clear picture to me of who is who in either the two people speaking or the two apparently separate species at war. The other thing that bothered me about it, and this may very well be because of my lack of reading space stories, was that it just all sounded to Star Wars'ish. The orbiting massive weapon of total power, the vastly outnumbered non-warrior people defending their world... It just didn't strike me as different enough to be pulled in and instead gave me the feeling of 'another space story'

I liked very much the introduction of the character traits in the prologue, this is something that can grab my interest in any kind of story. If I can be shown some part of the characters personality and especially if it is a part I can relate with, I become much more interested in finding out more about them. 

I can see from other responses, that my feeling of 'just another space story' should be ignored so I would like to comment on a couple of things that may help it as it is...

*Para #6 *- I think the use of 'Ancestors weapon' should be eliminated from here and just refer to it as "it". The reason is that for me it would draw me into the prologue more and it is understandable that the two talking would know exactly what they are talking about so would not need to define it in such a way to each other. Having the later descriptions of bygone era, and antiquated, give enough of an idea that the weapon is old etc. Just a thought is all.

Another thing I noticed from reading through the prologue and into the first chapter a little ways was that I have no idea which side is which and who belongs to them etc. I have multiple names of people with mention of separate species being at war with each other, one a league another an armada, and then I have a coalition and an alliance and no clue as to who is who... 

It makes me feel very lost and like I have missed the first book or something of that nature.  I can gather that the Alliance is related to humans due to the reference of Earth, but beyond that I just don't have any ideas and the prologue that pulled me into the first part of the story now has zero meaning to me at all because it is so disconnected.

Again I think you have a good thing going with the introduction of character traits on the prologue and it looks to be a very involved and in-depth story which are the kinds of stories I very much enjoy, but it just seems to get disconnected from itself so very quickly that I would have a very hard time reading it in a pleasurable way and would feel instead like I needed to take notes in order to piece things together eventually.

Only one last thing and this is likely due to the crossover from editor to web, there are many places where words have no space between them and I also do not understand the underlining of names in the story. Aside from those two things though the writing came across well, sentence structure and grammar did not detract from my reading at all so it is well written in my very humble opinion and I can easily say good job in that regard! I would also say that I do have lingering interest in finding out more about the two characters that fired the weapon so the prologue did get me interested and wanting to know more. :thumbr:

At any rate I just wanted to offer my thoughts on what I was able to read and comment on today, again please remember I am not a reader of space stories so if I am talking out my backside in regard to those aspects of the story feel very free to tell me so.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Two/ Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## The Thing

PROLOGUE

My main problem with this is that he conversation becomes a blur. I forgot who was who and saying what. There is no proper introduction to the characters. I know this in only a prologue, but still, even if I never see these characters again I'd like to get to know them. I have no picture in my head of who they are or of what's going on. I think you need to put more description between the dialogue: some actions; display traits; express thoughts. 

I wish I could say something more positive, but this hasn't drawn me in. It would need a lot of work. I suggest trying to slow the pace down a bit. If it's a novel, then you have the luxury of time.

Saying that, I see some potential for an interesting story to develop from this. A bit of hard work and patience and you could be heading in the right direction.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Two / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Three / Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Ajay

Brilliant Read.... Waiting for more...


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Ajay

Well, in that case, I most certainly do insist (If I twist any more, I'd "erase" its existence )


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## powerskris

*And Now ......The Rest of the Chapter*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Three / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Four / Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Nearing the end of the First Act*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Four / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Different Approaches*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Act Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Gravehound

I really love the setting and the end of the world kind of feel
and u are right, downsize the updates, they are a lot to read in one go
GH


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Five / Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Update!*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Five / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Five / Part Three*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Six / Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Six / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Six / Part Three*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Seven / Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Seven / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*By The Way!*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Razzazzika

Most people don't post their entire books on this site... Just usually an excerpt now and then. Are you sure you want your book out here in public domain like this? Are you looking for an edit or critique of the full book or something? I realize it's not  quite the full book YET... but at the rate you're going, you'll have a full book in this one post in no time.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Razzazzika

LoL, no, not irritating me, I read like, the first two posts I think when you initially posted this, I just notice it's always in the top two posts on the site, and I always click on it and think "WOW, he's still posting more chapters."


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## powerskris

*Chapter Seven / Part Three*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Eight / Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Ajay

Hey kris... I'm back =P

Sorry, was busy at college so couldn't check in all that much... Gotta catch up on my reading..


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Eight / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## geewizz

how did you get your post #15 to format liek a word document?  when i try to format my post, it is threaded together in a cumbersome mess.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## geewizz

thanks, i figured it out i think


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## powerskris

*Chapter Eight / Part Three*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Nine / Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Nine / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Nine / Part Three*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Ten / Part One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Treisan

The opening is good.  I wanted more description of the energy cannon but maybe that is just me.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Ten / Part Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Ten / Part Three*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Eleven / Scene One*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Eleven / Scene Two*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Lamperoux

I have


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter XI / Scene Three*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*Chapter Eleven / Scene Four*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

*We're back!*

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Nevermore

From what I can see so far, you set up conversations very well, the way the characters talk and interact with each other.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Quadrillion

Without reading it all, and having come from where you are now, I can make a couple of quick suggestions.

Use "said" words sparingly. (Replied, stated, etc). Just use "said", or like you did occasionally, don't use anything. You should probably never use "exclaimed", the sentence itself and the exclamation mark take care of that.

Use indents to start a paragraph, and use Word's built in checkers to spot missing periods and run on sentences. You're trying to put too many adjectives into each sentence, too many prepositions, also. "closed in on the Ferine home world of Cartise." Might be better ...Cartise, the Ferine home world. Take your time. Lathiel's LONG finger? Save "long" for when it matters, like when you're trying to get to know the character.

One final thought: Have a really good editor look at a dozen pages. Force her to rewrite a few of the paragraphs to show you where you're going wrong.


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## xanthreterra

I apologize for not giving you something more but could you format the text to make it more readable? It is hard to read line after line of double spaced sentences.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Quadrillion

Based on my experience, then, you're about five major revisions away from being ready to publish. Have you read it out loud to yourself? Just send out a few queries to begin with. If you get some real interest, you're onto something. If they read your first chapter or two and don't get back to you, it probably needs work. Good luck, though. On the other hand, maybe you're ready.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## cussedness

While everyone is complimenting your dialog, I think that you could make them smoother. For instance, the vast majority of them start with the words and then the movement without much variation. Secondly, I think you could get more physical description in along with the dialog, think about how other people move or see a play (I find plays more effective for learning about body movement than movies). I think that you're getting very close to professional quality and it's time to get very nit-picky about things to make that next jump in quality.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## cussedness

I like your characterization a lot. Are you going to post the revised versions?


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Quadrillion

powerskris said:


> There have been several revisions since this posted draft (which is nearly two years old now). The proofreader was asked to look for anything in regards to grammar, punctuation, continuity, awkward sentences, etc. I've already received her corrections and changed the final draft accordingly. I think that if you read the final one, you'd be pretty impressed with how different it really is. Due to the current climate in publishing, I've actually decided to go with e-publishing, and it will be out by February at the latest! I just need to do some typesetting and get the cover art done now. Thanks for all of your comments.



We're in the same boat. But I thought mine was ready two years ago after numerous rewrites, and it wasn't. That's why I told you (only partially in jest) that you had five more to go. I have one round of queries set to go out, but I'm not going to wait. Starting Monday I begin to look into the self-publishing. Publishers weekly just mentioned a guy who signed a two book deal who they described as "self published" and a kindle success, or something like that. Of course, Vince Flynn got his start self publishing.


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## Anneky45

I don't read scifi, fantasy is more my genre, but you hooked me and I read through. 
Good clear images and building of tension. Want to read more.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Walkio

This is predominantly dialogue, which I don't really have a problem with. Although I do think it could use more action - sighs, hands on hips, shakes of head, biting of lips, frowning etc. - to support the dialogue.

You need to start a new paragraph here:

“We don’t have time for everyone to participate in foresight. What do you see, Alexander?” Catherine asked. //

Alexander’s eyes glazed over as he stared into nowhere (Good, action!). “I see three hawks, one of them is in the sky, two are in a nest. The nest is on a Coalition flag,” he said after a long pause in the future.

Also, you use too many dialgoue attributes (he said, she stated, she argued etc.) - in fact, general consensus is that plain old 'said' is the most effective.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Walkio

I was commenting on post #101?


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## Anneky45

Thanks for the next installment. I am a little confused as to the 'damage control' not clear what 
the damage is - feel like I have missed something. 
I must be too interested in Christmas!!


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Walkio

I'm confused; do you want comments on what you're posting or not?


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## Walkio

Do you want comments on what you've just posted?


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Quadrillion

Have you ever stepped away from a chapter for six months and then gone back to read it?

Have you ever read Stephen King's "On Writing"?

What about Strunk and White?

(These two books are small, but a must read for writers.)

Check this out       http://www.tameri.com/edit/words2kill.html


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Walkio

Just curious - why post this and not the final draft then?


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Quadrillion

You mean that Chapter XIII that you just posted yesterday was from an earlier draft?


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## Razzazzika

still posting eh kris? I did read the first couple chapters, but then you kept posting them, and posting them, and posting them...


Walkio said:


> Just curious - why post this and not the final draft then?


I've long wondered this myself. You've now posted 13 chapters, and it doesn't look like you're going to stop until you're done. The big question is I suppose, if you HAVE done so many edits, and this WAS a previous version... what do you want from us? There has to be a reason you're posting all these chapters. If not for criticism, then what? I mean, I asked you about it once before, back in may... and you replied


powerskris said:


> No Razzazzika, I'm not going to post the entire novel. I'll probably post sixty to eighty percent of it. If someone really wants to rip it off, then good luck coming up with the ending!!! As I have said before, criticism is always welcome. If you want to comment on my style, the plot, grammar, etcetera, don't hold back! I always appreciate an objective eye as both of mine are subjective.
> 
> P.S. I hope my posts aren't irritating you!


(and no you're not irritating me) I'm just trying to figure out WHY someone would post so much of their novel in a thread like this. Sure, I get giddy for excerpts, and when I write what I think is a cool part I want to share it, but you're sharing EVERYTHING. If you plan on publishing the book, are you considering this promotion for its eventual release? I know some authors will post the first chapter or two or three for promotional purposes, but thirteen?

I dunno, I think I'm ranting... it's just that every time I come on this site, and I come here in spurts of like, a few days a month here, a couple months later for a few more days, and your thread is always one of the top five, and has been for the past year! Good God, this is the 116th post. In fact, looking at your post history, you haven't made a non-phoenix universe related post(this thread, or your numerous short story threads) since July, yet have been quite active on the forums... In your own threads.

Every time I post something of my work, I try to return the favor by reading some other works on the site and offering up my opinions, the last time you said anything that wasn't about your work was on this thread : http://www.writingforums.com/writing-discussion/122886-trouble-hero-villain.html , back on July 13.

I don't want to sound mean, and I usually never do these scathing rants, especially not bashing anybody, but to me you sound a tad bit narcissistic. I mean, your book was OK, but you seem to treat it like it's the only thing on this site to read.

Anyway, I feel horrible and mean for saying anything bad about anybody, so I'm just going to go back to ignoring this thread like I have been the past six months.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Walkio

Still curious - why post this and not the final draft?


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Walkio

powerskris said:


> Does that make any sense?



Yes, fine.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Potty

*Clicks print and legs it to a publisher* Ah you already have! Congrats on the book


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


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## Wilson Edward Burroughs

I enjoyed it a lot, surprised myself.


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## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


----------



## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


----------



## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


----------



## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


----------



## powerskris

Please refer to Post #136 on the final page for the prologue of the published novel.


----------



## powerskris

Okay, it's time to put up some cover art!!! Let me say that it was Justin Currie who did the cover art and I think the results are absolutely marvelous! And remember, the book goes on sale tomorrow, the 18th! Also, the website is now up and working, you can get to it here: Home - The Phoenix Chronicles


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## powerskris

*Final Prologue*

The book launched today, so here is the prologue as it appears in the final version of the novel. If you'd like to read more, please refer to my website at www.phoenixnovels.com. You can also see the "Kindle" area of the bookstore on this website.

*Prologue*

“The entire fleet’s gone?” Ranik asked. He peered over Lathiel’s shoulder and focused his slit, copper eyes on the small screen.

“Every last ship was destroyed,” Lathiel replied. He discerned distant pieces of burning wreckage floating through space. The debris was all that remained of their Ferine fleet. Lathiel thought of all his friends, even family, who had just given their lives in one last effort to defend their home world.

“They didn’t last fifteen minutes!” Ranik exclaimed.

“We’re not soldiers and our fleet was outnumbered fifty to one.”

“I had friends on those ships,” Ranik said. A look of grief wrinkled his aging features.

“So did I. We don’t have any options left. We have to use our ancestors’ weapon.”

“The recoil is still a major problem. We’re going to lose a lot of people here.”

“All of our defensive lines have been breached, Ranik. This is all we have left.”

“I used to look up into the night sky on our home world before you were even born. Every evening I’d see a big crater on that giant rock of Helas so far up in the sky and know that it was this station. I never thought we’d ever come here.”

The two Ferine watched the monitor showing the enemy fleet closing in on their home world while they watched from their safe vantage point on Helas. Others rushed around behind them in the small command post located at the top of the cannon’s wide maw. They hurried to ready the relic for a task it was supposed to have undertaken a millennium ago.

“The Nevargh fleet is nearly in range of the weapon. Bring the generators to maximum power,” Lathiel commanded.

Ranik shook his head and headed to a nearby console of a bygone era. The moment he arrived at the console he flipped several switches and a distant rumble was heard from deep within the planet.

“They’re nearly within optimum position,” Lathiel said. “There are millions of the dead from across the Old League who would cheer right now if they could.”

“I still can’t believe they betrayed us. We trusted them. The entire League trusted them.”

“And we paid for it. They’re in optimum range. It’s now or never.”

“Do you want me to do this? You’re young, Lathiel. I don’t want you to be responsible for something this destructive,” Ranik asked. 

His finger hovered over the button that would act&shy;ivate the antiquated cannon. Lathiel imagined he could see the shadows of his ancestors walking across the room in agitation. He consoled himself with the thought that at the very least, they weren’t going to use it against their own species, as was the original intent a millennium ago. “I volunteered to lead this mission. This is my responsibility and I will pay for what I do here.”

“Not alone,” Ranik said.

Lathiel pressed the button. A moment later the floor jumped from the jolt of the cannon’s waking. Lathiel lost his balance as the ceiling began to cave in.
A deep crater marring the mother—world of Helas began to glow. The Nevargh armada passing Helas didn’t notice the massive emerald circle on the barren planet’s surface as they closed in on its orbiting moon of Cartise. The bare rock around the impossibly wide chasm began to tremble. As the quake intensified, great cracks in the surface formed around the circular mouth of the weapon. Without further warning, it belched a great firestorm of emerald energy at the enemy armada. The deepest night turned into blinding starlight. The fleet dissolved in the apocalyptic weapon’s brilliance. Not satiated and far from spent, the blast continued into the void and tore through the space—time continuum.

The bright comet of destructive energy vanished from that part of the galaxy.

The space—time continuum erupted into chaos outside Earth’s Solar System. It writhed from an enormous power eager to manifest itself. Nearby, the Coalition’s sensor platforms sparked as an intense tidal wave of gravity radiated out from the distortion.


----------



## DarkMoonlight

I really like it, reminds of Mass effect and Warhammer 40k for some reason. May have to get me a copy!


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## powerskris

DarkMoonlight said:


> I really like it, reminds of Mass effect and Warhammer 40k for some reason. May have to get me a copy!



Thanks! I've never had the Phoenix Chronicles compared to those two franchises before, but I don't mind at all!!!


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## powerskris

Well, it's been a long time! I just had to let all of the great people here know that I decided to try out a promotion on Amazon Kindle for the book and I almost decided to cancel it. Holy Cow, am I glad I didn't!!!!! Over three hundred people decided to check it out for free which was so crucial to expanding my readership and actually made me rethink the price for the novel. So, hey one thing I've learned is not to put anything in concrete, even with myself!!!


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## powerskris

*The Phoenix Chronicles books one and two!*

 
 

    My new novel   is coming out soon, so I've decided to post the first chapter of my novel again for those interested. I will also be posting the first chapter of my secondnovel, The Phoenix Chronicles: Dark Horizon afterwards. 







 _The argument of stagnancy in the century long cold war between the Alliance and the Coalitionhas been heavily debated within historical venues. What the detractors don't understand is that we don't refer to the incredible advances due to the armsrace, but due to the lack of advances in the economic and social structures of both sides._
_            I therefore submit that it was due to these factors that the Council was intenton altering the balance of power. What happened afterwards was serendipity not of their making. How could it have been?_


Analysis of theOne Hundred and One Year Cold War


 _by Margaret   Strait_​


*Chapter I*


The Alliance Nine O’clock Shuttle arrived at Space Station Alpha orbiting Earth from which a sea of navy blue and polished rank pins flowed onto the pressur&shy;ized deck. A single officer shifted away from the mi&shy;grating group, and took an elevator to a deck five floors from the peak of the station’s summit.
            Three gold stars adorned each side of the raised collar on the man’s uniform, indicating the rank of Vice Admiral. Elliot Fredericks carried a suitcase filled with paper thin electronic documents intended for his superiors. The _links _held every last detail of the project that he had headed for the last ten years.
            Elliot accepted the project a few months after his last command of the _Norfolk_ had expired. He vowed never to command another ship again after that day. Elliot’s desk job had earned him his last three promotions and a place of respect within the Alliance forces.
            He exited the elevator and took the familiar path to Maria Peterson’s office down the wide, curving cor&shy;ridor. Reaching the double—door entryway to Maria’s office, Elliot took a moment to ensure his dark hair was straight and strodeacross the threshold just before the doors moved out of the way upon detecting his approach. A young adjutant sat at a desk in the small waiting room.
            “Hey Lieutenant,” Elliot said. The lean man looked up from his work.
            “Hello Sir,” the man said with a warm smile. “Ad&shy;miral Peterson had something unexpected come up and asked you to wait a few minutes.”
            “No problem,” Elliot replied. He took a seat on a tan couch on one side of the room.


----------



## powerskris

“What kind of game are you playing now?” the Coalition General demanded. He was dressed in an olive tunic adorned with three gold stars on each side of his collar.
            “General, I don’t even know what you’re talking about. All I know is what I was told. You wanted to discuss the Hades Three Sector and I accepted your signal. So, what’s the problem?” Maria asked.
            She tried to avoid the Coalition General whenever possible. He had stared at her chest whenever they both had attended an event. Maria was surprised that he was actually looking her in the eye across the monitor’s live feed.
            “You know damn well. Why would you damage our sensor buoys?”
            “Well, it’s quite simple,” Maria replied.
            “Yes?”
            “We didn’t damage your sensor buoys,” Maria said.
            “Then who did? There isn’t an Easter Island Agree&shy;ments to blame everything on anymore, so who else could have fired on them?”
            “It wasn’t us. We don’t have any ships in that area of space and it has no tactical value to us,” Maria replied.
            “If you say so.”
            “What do you want, General?”
            “An apology for starters.”
            “I won’t apologize for something we didn’t do.” Maria paused and put a hand to her brow. “How many sensor arrays are we talking about anyway?”
            “You know damn well how many.”
            “Humor me.”
            “Two.”
            “That only covers a few thousand cubic kilometers  of empty space outside the solar system. If you’re so insistent about explanations, I’ll send a ship to investigate,” Maria placated.
            “We’re already sending warships to find out what you’re up to.”
            “Then you won’t mind if we confirm it,” Maria said.
            “Fine. I’ll be happy to have one of your ships there when we expose your sabotage. INN will hear about this.”
            Maria rolled her eyes at the reference to the Interplanetary News Network. “Then my government will sue for libel. It’s been nice talking to you and I’m glad that you’ve finally noticed what color my eyes are.”
            “What?”
            “Goodbye, General,” Maria said, and deactivated the link. She pressed a small button on her obsidian desk.
            “O’Toole?”
            “Yes, Admiral,” a voice replied immediately.
            “Send in Admiral Fredericks. Tell him I want good news.”
            “I’ll try to deliver,” Elliot said as he walked into her office.
            “Have a seat,” Maria said with a gesture to one of the two chairs in front of her desk. She had chosen their pale blue color to accentuate the deep, obsidian glass of her desk. Elliot sat down on one and pulled a short stack of paper—thin links from his suitcase.
            “Construction is right on schedule.”
            “That’s great.” Her brow furrowed under a mane of long dark hair. She leaned over her desk. “Eli, I just had the strangest conversation with a Coalition General."
            “And?”
            “He’s convinced we damaged a couple of their sensor arrays.”
            “Where?”
            “Somewhere in the backwoods of space outside of the solar system. He even threatened to go to the networks,” Maria replied.
            “What did you say?”
            “What do you think? We have nothing to do with it, but I’m sending a ship out there just to be sure. The truth is that he got me curious enough to find out what caused it,” Maria replied.
            “Could they have malfunctioned?”
            “The Coalition may be behind us in technology, but it’s still pretty dependable,” Maria said and stared for a moment into empty space. “Anyway, you have re&shy;ports for me.”
            “Right here,” Elliot said, placing the electronic papers in front of her.
            “So give me the details. Are the ships still in pieces all over the system?”
            “Not as many. The engines are still being constructed on Ganymede, but should be completed in eight weeks. The shield generators on Titan are finished and will be integrated with the hulls on Mars in two weeks,” Elliot reported.
            “And the hulls? How far along are they?”
            “The shipyard’s master tells me that they’re about ninety percent complete with about sixty percent of their equipment installed,” Elliot replied.
            “What about the weapon systems on Luna?”
            “They’ll be finished tomorrow. We’re getting ready to ship the first hundred in a few hours,” Elliot replied.
            “Good. They’re not much good to us as warships if they don’t have any weapons.”
            “I guess not, Ma’am.”
            “I’ll just sign off on these and we’ll have you on your way,” Maria said. 
            She grabbed the pile of links that he had deposited on her desk. True to her word, Maria took the next half hour asking questions about the various links in her hands and once she was satisfied with the answers, signed off on them.


----------



## powerskris

Elliot took the links off her desk and stuffed them back into his suitcase. He thanked her and left for the return shuttle to Saturn in order to get the shield generators ready for shipping. It was then that Elliot remembered that he still had business to take care of. It had been too long since he had stopped in on Joshua and Madison. The thought of seeing them again brought the usual coiling in the pit of his stomach.
            They were his wife’s friends from ten years ago and, yes, they were his as well, but the death of Lillian had soured the relationship. They were two friendly couples, and then one of the couples became a widower. Elliot had gained command of the _Suffolk_ after the _Norfolk__’s _loss and was glad to have both Madison and Joshua serving aboard the same ship at first. To his surprise, there was little to talk about once the mourning period was over and sitting in silence around a table in the officers’ mess showed that the dynamic of the group had been irrevocably damaged. Elliot had asked for reassignment to groundside duties within a month. 
            He paused outside the entrance to Maria's office, unsure about visiting them. An expression of indignant indecision appeared on his face. No, it would have to be this time. The last time was well over a year ago. Madison would be furious with him.
            Elliot found himself walking on autopilot. He was already halfway to the elevator that would take him back to the outbound shuttle for Saturn. With an abrupt about face he turned and stalked toward the elevator that would take him to the Alliance's Third Battle Group.
            Once again he found himself embarking on a sleek, grey shuttle bound for somewhere other than home. Sitting down in the mildly claustrophobic passenger shuttle, Elliot thought of excuses to offer the couple after his long absence.
            "You can always find the time when you want to,” Madison would probably say.
            He didn’t really have an excuse other than his reluctance to take part in a long expired friendship with people that reminded him of his deceased wife. 
            Elliot looked up from musing to discover that he had already exhausted the short trip to the Allied Warship _Endeavour_.
            He rose from his seat with care to avoid the low ceiling and made his way to the exit for Joshua's ship. The half a mile long _Victory C_lass Cruiser had wide, thick wings with a central tapering neck. The warship looked like a massive grey metal eagle ready to pounce.
            Elliot disembarked and worked his way through corridors and lifts until he was at the threshold of the bridge. He gathered a deep breath and walked through the parting doors to the command center.
            The large rectangular bridge had a series of consoles with embedded displays. A large weapons station was next to him. The station existed as a claustrophobic gathering of displays and monitors that faced the large screen on the other side of the bridge. The weapons officer looked up from his work.
            "Admiral on Deck!"
            Some thirty officers, including his friends, rose to attention. Joshua was at his customary position in the command chair, located in front of the weapons station. Madison stood to his right as first officer. Three silver bars adorned each side of her collar. 
            “At ease,” Elliot said. The officers and enlisted men immediately went back to their work.
            "Sir?” Joshua asked.
            "Josh, it's okay. This isn't an official visit. You can call me Eli."
            "Haven’t seen you in a while, Eli,” Joshua said in his Southern drawl.
            "I’ve been a little busy with the Horizon Project. I’m sorry I didn't drop by sooner."
            “You haven’t dropped by in almost a year,” Joshua mumbled.
            “Josh,” Madison said from his right. She stared directly into his blue eyes.
            “Yes?”
            “Shut up,” she said, tousling his blond hair. “He’s here now.”
            "It is good to see both of you again.”
            “You felt obligated to come and meet some old friends,” Madison said. “Come here.”
            She embraced him in a warm hug and then pulled back.
            "We’re almost done our shifts. Would the handsome Admiral care to see our new officers’ mess? It was renovated six months ago and I think you’ll like it.”
            Elliot inwardly balked at a half—hearted con&shy;versation over drinks but accepted in spite of his misgivings. Joshua stood up from his seat and looked to an officer at a nearby station.
            “When does Lieutenant—Commander Scott arrive for his shift?”
            “In five minutes, Sir.”
            “Can you handle the bridge for five minutes Sub—Lieutenant?” Joshua demanded of the frightened man.
            “I,” he hesitated before remembering his training. “Yes, Sir.”
            Joshua gave him a quick nod and led the party off the bridge. The couple led him through several arched hallways painted in matching colours of cream and light grey until they found themselves in a lift, which took them from the centrally located command deck to the very top of the ship.
            Elliot was impressed by the sight that awaited him. The newly renovated officers’ mess was spacious and comfortable. The large room was about two hundred feet long and half that wide. The warm burgundy walls were a good twenty feet high, affording the far wall's tall windows a panoramic view of the full length of _Endeavour’s _hull. Distant stars glittered beyond the ship’s dorsal armour.
            The trio found a plush, three—sided booth on a middle rise, facing the spectacular view and sat down. A head waiter saw the small group of high ranking officers and immediately went over to take their orders.
            “What’s good?” Elliot asked his hosts.
            “The house draft is pretty good,” Joshua replied.
            “They have a pretty good chardonnay, too,” Madison said. 
            “House draft,” Elliot said to the attendant. Joshua ordered the same and Madison ordered a dry, white wine. The order arrived shortly thereafter.
            "So Eli, what have you been doing for the last year?” Joshua asked before lifting a tall glass of golden ale to his lips.
            "Finishing what I signed on to."
            “I thought you’d have moved on to something else by now, like command of a battle group,” Madison said.
            “No, not for me. I’m thinking of moving to HQ once this is over.”
            “You mean to a desk job?” Joshua inquired.
            “Is there something wrong with a desk job?”
            “There isn’t if you’re an old man,” Joshua replied.
            Elliot looked at him with a stern face before breaking into a heartfelt laugh for the first time in what felt like years.
            “You’re a smartass,” Elliot said.
            “That’s what Madi tells me.”
            “It’s true. I really do,” Madison said and drank from her glass.
            “I’d hate to admit it, but I really missed you two.”
            “Likewise,” Madison said and raised a glass for a toast. All three of them clinked their beverages and took a sip of their beverages before returning them to the table. “So when does my husband get a battleship to command? Hell, when do I finally get a command?”
            “In three months they’ll be ready for trial runs. The rest of the fleet will be phased out over the next twenty years after that,” Elliot replied.
            “I’d hate to say goodbye to this ship,” Joshua said and looked around the large bar.
            “Don’t worry Josh,” Elliot said. “She was last off the line and will be the last to exit the stage. Besides by then you’ll be what, fifty—five, and probably an Admiral?”
            “Not if I can help it.”
            “Eli,” Madison began before Elliot heard a beep from the small, dark piece of technology that clung to his earlobe.
            “Sorry,” Elliot interrupted and activated the earpiece. He listened for a moment, nodded, and then acknowledged the order. “I’ve got to go.”
            “You just got here. You haven’t even finished your drink!”
            “I’ll see if I can get back,” Elliot replied, and left the officer’s lounge.


----------



## powerskris

On the dark side of Earth, Nadine Hanover stood in a damp holding cell deep beneath the Headquarters of the Modern Enterprise Religious Aggregate. She had not bothered to wear her contact lenses, since the prisoner was aware of her true nature. The woman cowering in the corner of the room futilely thumped at her head with clenched fists. She couldn’t bear to look into Nadine’s all white eyes and instead stared at the floor while her mind was raped for information.
            As the woman began to sob uncontrollably, Nadine withdrew her consciousness from the wretched lump on the floor. Now that Nadine had what she needed, she turned away and left the room, closing the heavy door behind her.
            She walked through several dim, depressing corridors before reaching the lift that would take her into the main portion of the building. Nadine thought briefly of her father as the lift passed Detention Level E.
            MERA's central complex was an impressive con&shy;struction of distinctly Gothic buildings sitting on the east coast of what was once known as Russia. Great arches and towers surrounded a central stone building with a unique twelve—sided dome sitting at the top of the structure.
            The elevator deposited Nadine on the top floor. She passed through grand corridors adorned with wooden fittings and low, wrought iron benches. Finally, she stopped at a relatively small set of dark mahogany doors closely guarded by two sentries armed with particle rifles. 
            Nadine nodded to them and confidently strode through the entrance to the inner chamber of the Council of Twelve. A group of a dozen elderly men and women were dressed in long, dark robes. They sat in high—backed mahogany chairs within the twelve sided stone room.
            “I take it your interrogation is finished?” Prime Counsel Catherine asked. She had once been beautiful, but that was decades ago. High cheek bones now sagged next to a hawkish nose and a small wrinkled mouth sat over a wizened chin. In contrast to her aged, white skin, her silver—white hair glistened from care&shy;ful attention.
            "May I present my findings?" Nadine asked.
            The wrinkled old female speaker of the group smiled through her pristine teeth.
            "Go ahead."
            "The agent Lisa was sending intelligence to the Alliance, as you suspected. We would be best advised to tell the Coalition's Encoding Branch that Code Four Seventy One has been leaked to the Alliance,” she stated.
            "Is that all?” Councillor Alexander asked.
            "Yes. We caught her before she had the opportunity to do any real damage."
            “And what of Lisa?” Catherine asked.
            “I had to cause some minor brain damage to ensure that she wouldn’t remember me.”
            “What would you recommend we do with her now?” Catherine asked in a rare act of consultation.
            “She won’t remember anything. I’d recommend letting the Alliance have her back. They’ll think twice after trying this again once they’ve seen the results of planting spies at MERA Headquarters.”
            "A practical suggestion," Catherine said.
            “If you feel it’s unwise, she can be sequestered here indefinitely.”
            “No,” Catherine said, “you misunderstood me. The suggestion was a good one. The Alliance will not try this again after seeing one of their spies lobotomized. I would enjoy seeing their faces once she’s found wandering the streets of New York.”
            “If there is nothing else, my alter ego should have finished her report to you by now. I should return to my command of Battle Group Alpha Two.”
            “We need to speak with you on a few points before you go,” Catherine said. “We have new orders for you.”
            “Of course, my Teacher.”
            "I saw a coming calamity last night as I wandered in the future,” Alexander said. “At a crucial point a member of the military will be called on to take part in some very sensitive negotiations. They won’t assign you to that position.”
            “No they won’t, but we aren’t going to give them a choice. We are elevating you to the rank of Lieutenant General in the Diplomatic Branch of the Coalition's fleet. The current General will be removed."
            “Thank—you, my Teacher.”         
            “Be careful, Nadine. You will meet a dangerous man in these negotiations,” Catherine said.
            “May I ask who he is?”
            “Vice Admiral Elliot Fredericks.”
            “Is he a Defensive?” Nadine asked.
            “Very astute, my student. Yes, he is a Defensive and he studied under Michael DePietro, among others. I’ve never known any Aggressive who has been able to pierce his mind,” Catherine replied.
            “I’ll be careful.”
            “He has concealed his identity from the rest of the Alliance military, the same as you have from ours. You won’t be able to point him out by black irises,” Catherine said.
            “I understand.”
            “In the meantime, something near the borders of the Solar System has attracted our attention. We thought the Alliance had destroyed some of our sensor plat&shy;forms, but as it turns out, there is an anomaly out there of unknown origin,” Catherine said.
            “That’s incredible.”
            “Isn’t it? We have the possibility of first contact with another intelligent species. Even if this isn’t the case, we need someone out there we can trust.”
            “When should I leave?” Nadine asked.
            “Immediately,” Catherine replied as a guard gave her a link with coordinates. “Take a shuttle back to the battle group and depart for the coordinates indicated on that link. Return and report to us once you have done a proper analysis.” 
            Nadine nodded and left the room at a motivated pace. Once the doors closed, Catherine focused her attention on Alexander.
            “I wish you could have been more specific. That one is incredibly valuable to us. One day, she will replace me as Prime Counsel.”
            “I believe I interpreted the symbols correctly,” Alexander said.
            “And Nadine must be there when the, what did you say they were, Alexander?”
            “Cats. They were docile cats,” Alexander replied.
            “When these “cats” come to Earth.”
            “What are these cats supposed to be, Alexander?” Napoleon asked from his left.
            “They could be a play on the idea of pets. Perhaps servants of some kind that arrive here and cause upheaval,” Alexander said.
            “Well, this will ensure we are well prepared,” Catherine said. “Now, it’s time we returned to our schedule.”
            The Twelve returned to their regular activities, deciding on legislation and policy for the Coalition.


----------



## powerskris

*Dark Horizon: Chapter One*

 _* Without further ado, here is the first excerpt of The Phoenix Chronicles: Dark Horizon:  
* You see, the odd thing was that the dawn of the twenty—fourth century didn’t belong to Earth and the Colonized Sphere. It belonged to the worlds of the Old League. I know, I know, the people we left behind endured horrible things during those years as the Coalition consolidated the Colonized Sphere under their rule. I had friends who lived through those times and I do sympathize with them, but they didn’t build what we did.
 I know how many of them died trying to save some shred of the Alliance while the Twelve subverted them. I now and have never tried to undermine what they accomplished in their own way. All I’m saying is that what we did saved humanity. We did that over here, on Cartise.
 I don’t understand why everyone keeps taking my comments out of context!

 Excerpt from an interview with 
Fleet Admiral (ret.) Maria Peterson
Circa 2357
_
*Chapter I
*
“Elik!” Tamien exclaimed from his post at the Sensor Analysis Station.
 Elik turned away from his scrutiny of the large monitor occupying the front wall of the Command Center and walked up the three steps to the second level. Elik could see the glistening sweat on Tamien’s brown skin as he approached.
 “Look.” Tamien indicated the massed blips of the Nevargh fleet on the round sensor display. “They’ve begun moving.”
 “Tell our ships to form their defensive bubble above the equator, and switch to the short range sensor arrays on planet. Where are our reinforcements?” Elik demanded. A feeling of panic began to grow in the base of his stomach.
 “They’re destroying our sensor platforms.” Tamien indicated blips on the screen winking out as small groups of Nevargh warships from the main group swarmed across different areas of the screen.
 “They’ve decided to blind us first,” Elik observed.
 “It seems so, Sir.”
 “I’m an elected official, Tamien, not one of the ancient monarchs. Call me Elik.”
 “They appear to be doing this to all of our sensor platforms across the outer borders of the system.”
 “They’re doing exactly what Nevargh do,” Elik said, focusing his slit eyes on the large screen embedded in the console. “They terrorize us first.”
 “Yes, Sir.”
 “Where are our reinforcements?” 
 “The Humans, Sir?”
 “Yes, and again, call me Elik.”
 “Elik, from what I’m seeing here, it looks like there blinding effort will take at least fifteen minutes,” Tamien said.
 “That at least gives us some time for the Alliance to arrive.”
 “Elik,” the brown skinned Ferine said, looking up to his senior, “am I able to ask something about these new allies?”
 “You have questions outside what was outlined in our briefs to the public?” Elik asked.
 Tamien thought of these documents before responding. “I haven’t actually read them.” 
 “It was a legal document.”
 “Elik, do you know how many of us actually read every bill the Science Assembly puts through?”
 “I take it not many,” Elik replied.
 “Why would we?”
 “Sometimes they’re very important.” 
 “Like the one that made this new species an ally?”
 “Humans,” Elik supplied.
 “Yes,” Tamien said, continuing his scrutiny of the sensor analysis. “Why are we putting our trust in them?”
 “A registered voter asks.”
 “I didn’t say I was registered,” Tamien said. He blinked his cat-like eyes which sat on a face accented by large cheekbones.
 “At any rate, I will answer any question from someone who just might vote for me in the future.”
 “I thought so. Who are they?”
 “The Humans? They’re from a planet ten thousand light years away and their weapons technology is generations ahead of our own.”
 “And that means we should embrace them? Whatever happened to peace?”
 “With the Nevargh?” Elik asked, turning his head towards the youth. “Even you must know how futile that is.”
 “Yeah,” Tamien said, lowering his chin, “but why would we bring this new race in? Don’t we have enough to deal with without taking on these refugees?”
 “Their refuge is our sanctuary.”
 “What?” Tamien asked, raising his brown chin.
 “They had no choice but to leave their home world and they needed to go somewhere far away where their enemies couldn’t pursue them.”
 “That’s us?”
 “That’s Cartise, yes. It would take their enemies, the Coalition, ten years to arrive here. So they’re safe here. Well, except for the Nevargh,” Elik replied.
 Tamien returned his attention to the screen for only a moment before regarding the old Ferine again. “If they’re here to protect us with powerful weapons, why did they leave their home world in the first place?”
 Elik sighed and kept his attention on the sensor analysis monitor while he replied. “It’s called Earth and their enemies have greater numbers and more advanced weapons technology than the Nevargh do. They couldn’t stay on Earth without facing certain death.”
 “That’s sad, but do we have the resources to take in millions of refugees?”
 “We should be fine,” Elik replied.
 “But millions of violent Humans? Is this wise for us to do? We’re pacifists and now were letting aggressive animals right into our homes. What if they’re worse than the Nevargh?
 Elik shifted his attention to Tamien’s concerned, brown face. “First of all, they’re not animals. Second, I would choose the Humans over the Nevargh every time.”
 “But we’re going to be part of their government? Aren’t you giving up a lot?”
 “You have been hearing a few things on the news, I see. We’re giving up some interplanetary power, but not as much as you might think,” Elik replied.
 “And this is all worth it?”
 “We need allies, Tamien. No one from the Old League has offered to help us. We don’t exactly have many choices.”
 “I suppose not, but don’t these Humans have reason to hate us now? Didn’t the weapon we fired from Helas nearly destroy their world?” Tamien asked.
 “We weren’t trying to hit them and we had to destroy a Nevargh armada that was about to invade our home.”
 “And the Nevargh are about to try again. Still, I wouldn’t have been too happy with us, if I were the Humans. They would have had every reason to hate us let alone ally with us,” Tamien remarked, looking up at the Head of the Science Assembly.
 “Their enemies don’t like us either. They put us on trial and found us guilty.”
 “I thought they found the Ferine innocent,” Tamien said.
 “They found the Ferine race innocent but wanted to try individual Ferine for the destruction of Earth’s Moon.”
 “I’m not surprised. I did hear that they took some of our people hostage.”
 “And the Alliance rescued them as part of their treaty with us,” Elik said, still stooped over his workstation.
 “They’re more forgiving then I might have been,” Tamien said.  His attention then shifted to the large screen at the center of his wide, grey console. “I’m reading large scale graviton emissions at the edge of the system.”
 “Are they Nevargh?”
 “No, I’ve never seen this before,” he replied. The odd clouds of color on the screen resolved themselves into a hundred ships. “I’m reading a fleet of vessels. They’re all identical: two miles long and heavily armed.”
 Elik stood up to address the Communications Officer. “Send a signal.”
 The Ferine at the station nodded and bent to her instruments for a moment. “I’ve got them.”
 Elik gawked once he saw a Human woman with metal on her face regarding him from the main monitor. “I’m sorry, I was expecting Admiral Fredericks.”
 “It’s alright. There was a change of plans. Eli was forced to stay behind,” Maria said. “I’m in command of the fleet and the senior most surviving officer in the refugee fleet. We’ve detected a large group of ships on a course for the fourth planet in the system.”
 “It’s the Nevargh, Admiral, and the fourth planet is our home world. We need assistance from our new ally.”
 “You have it,” Maria replied and closed the communications channel.


----------



## powerskris

“Battle stations!” Maria exclaimed. A series of three loud klaxons sounded across the fleet. Marching boots caused thousands of decks across a hundred ships to tremble. A moment later the sound of drums died down and Joshua reported to his superior.
     “We’re at full alert. All ships report at ready.”
     “Inform the commanders of all gunships to be ready for launch,” Maria ordered. “What is the enemy’s ETA for Cartise?”
     “Five minutes,” her Sensory Analysis Officer reported from one side of the three storey bridge.
     “What’s ours?”
     “Six minutes.”
     “Is there any way we can beat them?” she asked her helmsman.
     “If we push our sub—light engines to one hundred and twenty percent of normal, we can shave about a minute and a half off of that estimate.”
     “Do it. Commodore Hubbard, tell the rest of the fleet to do the same,” Maria said.
     Joshua nodded and began to speak into his earpiece again to relay Maria’s orders. His wife, Madison, busied herself at the Sensory Analysis Station to ready the gunships for deployment.
     “Bring up the tactical analysis of the situation at Cartise and put it on three dimensional representation.” Maria walked to the area between the helm and the main monitor. A large holographic representation of Cartise appeared with two thousand gentle Ferine ships in orbit around it. She stared at the analysis for a moment before saying anything.
     “What are they doing?” she asked aloud before turning to the Communications Station. “Signal the Ferine Command Center again.”
     Elik’s face reappeared on the monitor. “I didn’t expect to hear from you again so soon.”
     “Elik, do you have any idea why your ships are in their present formation?”
     “I ordered them to take that stance.”
     “You really don’t have any battle experience do you?”
     “I don’t think that’s something to be ashamed of,” Elik replied.
     “Admiral,” Joshua said, joining her near the front of the bridge, “I don’t think we should be peeing on our neighbor’s lawn after they invited us to stay for the night.”
     “Thanks for the insight, Commodore,” Maria said and turned her attention back to the agitated Ferine on the screen. His high placed ears seemed to bend back against his skull. “I suppose it isn’t Elik, but I need your ships in a better stance than the one they’re in right now. I’m sending the information on the formation I want you to take.”
     She copied the information into a link and transmitted the data to him. He took a moment to receive it and then looked up once he had reviewed the orders.
     “There are a lot of gaps in this formation, Admiral.”
     “Those gaps will be filled by our ships once we arrive. I’ll contact you again once we’re in orbit.”
     “Alright. I’ll humor you for now since you’re better at this than we are,” Elik allowed and deactivated the transmission.
     “He’s a little arrogant,” Maria remarked.
     “He’s the most experienced Ferine they have in battle right now. Elik will come around once he’s seen what we can do,” Joshua said. “You did a good job though, Admiral.”
     “I don’t see any reason to patronize me, Commodore.”
     “Well, you aren’t a diplomat, Ma’am,” Joshua said.
     “And I never wanted to be. Feel free to keep me in line whenever I’m not being _diplomatic_.”
     “Yes, Ma’am.”
     “Just don’t cross any lines,” she advised with a narrowed eye leveled at him.
     “I wouldn’t dare, Ma’am. Eli always told me that no one screws with you.”
     “Elliot always kept things pretty informal between you two, didn’t he?” she asked.
     “We were friends a long time.”
     “So were we,” Maria said, thoughtfully. “Well, out of respect for him, you can call me Maria.”
     “What about Madi?”
     “Her too, I suppose. Helm, what’s our status?” Maria asked the man at the horseshoe shaped console behind her.
     “Coming into orbit now, Ma’am.”
     “Tactical, deactivate the 3D Analysis,” Maria said and returned to a command seat nearly identical to the one in the Phoenix Command Center on Earth. It had the same railing around it, allowing for the platform to travel between all three levels. The gate was left open so that it wouldn’t be an impediment to her.
     “All battleships are to take up the indicated positions within the Ferine fleet.” Maria watched the small fleet entered the cloud of Ferine ships. She could see the main monitor’s view change as they swung around to confront the two thousand Nevargh warships. They were a swarm of small grey dots growing larger by the second.
     “Launch all gunships,” Maria commanded. “Once they’re in place they need to launch their fighters.”
     Joshua nodded and continued to relay orders through his earpiece. The two mile long warships sprayed out nearly thirty thousand thick-winged, off-white ships with small battle modules mounted on top of their hulls.
     The large fleet of support vessels took up their positions within the fleet. A squadron of light grey, drone-like fighters issued from each gunship and placed themselves in a star formation around every support vessel.
     “Everyone’s in position,” Joshua reported.
     A cloud of dark specks became tailless stingrays accompanied by larger craft with long necks and wide wings. Great pincer-like appendages capable of delivering high-energy pulses were mounted at the noses of both the smaller and larger craft. The larger vessels were unique in that they had one or more weapon mounts slung atop their heavy hulls.
     “Battleships switch to setting two,” Maria ordered. Turrets opened across the hulls of the great warships and began to swing back and forth across their metal trenches.
     “The Nevargh fleet is slowing,” the helmsman reported. “At their current reduction in velocity they will be at a full stop one thousand kilometers from our ships.”
     “What is their weapon status, Tactical?”
     “Their weapons are armed and their shields are up, but they haven’t gone hot yet,” he replied.
     “They’re overconfident, just as I thought. Get ready to fire. Tell our forces to hold back until after we’ve fired the AP Grids.”
     “They’re scanning our ships, but not the Ferine’s,” her tactical officer reported.
     “We’ve got them confused. All I needed was a moment of indecision,” Maria said. “Fire all AP Grids!”
     A hundred octagonal grids gushed out bright, white beams. They screamed across the Nevargh fleet shocking the scaly race. Three hundred warships dissolved in their brilliance and the enemy fleet fell into chaos.
     “Order the Ferine and the gunships to target their scout vessels. Leave their capital ships to us. All ships: fire at will!” Maria barked, once the brilliant beams had dissipated.
     The Ferine ships opened up with fuzzy green pulses, finding themselves to be a small voice of support once the battleships fired everything in their arsenals. Innumerable rounds of torpedoes, particle beams and plasma fire filled the night. The Nevargh had begun to return fire but were still attempting to recover from the first barrage. Most of their capital ships were destroyed within seconds as heavy plasma cannons taxed their shields, only to be followed up by another burst from the Alliance battleships. Nevargh frigates, destroyers, and cruisers lit up in a series of explosions and then rent apart.
     “I hope they’re scared enough to leave in the next forty seconds.”
     “If we run out of time on the second setting, we’ll fall to the back lines to recharge,” Maria said. “By then most of their heavier vessels should be out of the picture.”
     “I hope you’re right.”
     “Estimates?” Maria demanded of her weapons officer.
     “They’ve lost over a thousand ships, Ma’am. Weapon generators will have to shut down in thirty seconds,” he replied.
     “Ma’am!” her communications officer exclaimed. “Their flagship is sending out a broadband encrypted signal.”
     “A recall order?” Joshua guessed, looking to his commanding officer.
     Maria was relieved to see the remaining ships turn from the battle and retreat from the Ferine’s home world. 
     “Look’s like our bluff worked,” Joshua said with a sigh of relief. He watched the warships as they jumped to Faster-Than-Light speeds and out of the system.
     “It buys us time,” Maria said.
     “I’ve got a signal from planet—side,” her communications officer reported. “Elik would like to speak with you.”
     “I’m glad I washed my butt today,” Maria said to an amused Joshua. The screen switched to the image of the elderly Ferine, mouth gaping wide open at the events that had just transpired.
     “I never thought,” Elik began.
     “You never thought we stood a chance,” Maria finished for him. Her faceplate gleamed in the overhead lights of the bridge.
     “I had hoped our race would survive this day.”
     “Elik, we’ve bought you time to rebuild and create a more adequate defense with our technology. Are my people able to seek refuge on your worlds?”
     “Don’t worry, we’ll hold up our end of the bargain. Our scientists have already started on the retrofits to our shipyards with the specifications you gave us.”        
     “The Prime Ministers are going to want to talk to you on how to proceed,” she said.
     “Of course,” he said, and deactivated the channel.


----------



## powerskris

“I have news from the battlefront, Your Majesty,” a nervous Colonel said.
     “Present it,” the Nevargh Emperor Xichun the Fifth said. He remained seated on his throne of gold inlaid Stone-Wood. A short crown of platinum encrusted with sapphires rested on his head.
     “The fleet sent to capture the Ferine’s home world has failed. Eight hundred ships are returning to our borders, Sir.”
     “How did this happen?” Xichun demanded, glancing at the Army General to his left.
     “If I may approach?” the Colonel asked.
     The Emperor nodded briefly and the officer presented a thick, square piece of technology to him, detailing the report. He then stepped back a short distance out of respect. Xichun read the data through eyes the color of obsidian. He made sure the device was angled sufficiently for the Army General to see it as well. After a moment, he looked up to the Colonel.
     “Tell the commander of the fleet to hold position at the edge of our space while we decide on our next course of action,” he said and motioned for the Colonel to leave the room, which was comprised of stone walls covered in ornate hangings and portraits of previous monarchs.
     The Emperor waited for the officer to vacate the area before he cautiously got to his feet and faced the Army General.
     “I trust that I didn’t overstep my bounds?”
     “No Xichun, that decision was appropriate,” the General replied, staring at the small Nevargh with cold, green eyes. “In light of this new force defending the Ferine, we have to be cautious. Give me the link.”
     The Emperor didn’t hesitate to hand him the report. He waited while Sonti reviewed the sensor data gathered from the fleet.
     “These ships are unlike anything we’ve ever seen,” the General said aloud. “They’re massive.”
     “Could they be the Wallick’s _Leviathan Class _dreadnaughts, Sonti?”
     “They are unlike anything the Wallick have ever manufactured and it’s General Sonti. Remember your place, Xichun.”
     The comment forced Xichun into silence while the General continued to review the data. It was only once he finished that the Emperor dared to speak again. “May I ask who they are, General?”
     “They are not from any known worlds. The trajectory of that fleet indicates they came from the direction of the old Pera Empire.”
     “But, there’s nothing out there.”
     “There is now,” Sonti replied. “I’m ordering the fleet to return to the nearest system for repairs. I’ll expect your signature on the order within the hour.”
     “Of course, General.”
     “I’ll ask the general staff to caucus on this matter,” Sonti said. “I’m going to need a few hours. The court will have to go into recess.”
     “You’re going to ask for advice from your Generals?”
     “They aren’t of much use to me, but from time to time they do offer a few worthwhile insights.”
     “Yes, General.”
     “I’ll come to a decision within a few hours,” Sonti said, and walked away.



     “I’m glad to meet you,” Prime Minister Linda Simon said to Elik. She stepped out of her shuttle and into a cool evening on Cartise. The other four ministers gathered behind her. The prime ministers had requested a meeting as soon as possible after the battle and were hurried in from one of the adjacent systems to which the arks had been diverted. “I’m Prime Minister Linda Simon.”
     Elik took her proffered hand warmly. “Prime Minister.”
     “I’m not one for standing on formality with another dignitary. Please, call me Linda.”
     “Thank—you, Linda,” Elik said.
     “Allow me to introduce my associates. These are Prime Ministers Desmond Green, Kim Yung, Ahmed Abraham, and Mathis Laurier,” Linda said, indicating each of the other elected officials.
     “I’m pleased to meet you,” Elik said.
     “And now for something a little less pleasant,” Desmond Green said from her left. “You do understand, Elik, that as a signing member of the Alliance, we are now your government.”
     “I am aware of that, Prime Minister,” Elik replied. “I also understand that as part of the democratic process, we are supposed to have our own duly elected members in your Senate.”
     “Yes,” interjected Linda before Desmond could respond. “We’ve decided that it is wise to hold a general election as soon as possible. I imagine that we may not be Ministers for very long given the ratio of Ferine to Humans right now.”
     “I’m sure you’ll have a good platform.”
     “Out of curiosity,” Prime Minister Mathis interrupted, “do you have a current government for all of your colonies?”
     “No,” Elik replied. “We have one government per planet. What will become of them?”
     “They will have power on a local scale,” Linda replied. “Larger interests such as the military, the constitution, and any outside threats fall to us.”
     “Would that be acceptable to your planetary governments?” Kim Yung asked.
     “I believe so,” Elik replied.
     “Good. Onto the next subject,” Desmond said. “We need to set up our government in exile. We’ll require offices for ourselves and the Senate.”
     “We did anticipate that and have found a temporary location for the Senate. There is a coliseum in the capital that should suffice for now,” Elik said.
     “Admiral Peterson has also requested a liaison,” Desmond said.
     “Hmm,” Elik said, and thought for a moment. “We don’t have any generals or admirals as you know. We’re just not set up that way. I believe that Dorna would be up to the task.”
     “Has any of the military met him?”
     “No, none of them has met her, but she has more experience with fleet operations than most. I think she’ll be well suited to the position.”
     “That sounds fine,” Linda said. “Could you have someone bring us to the coliseum? We have a great deal of work ahead of us.”
     “I’ll take you personally.”
     “We are understandably concerned about the Nevargh,” Linda said while Elik guided them to a ground vehicle.
     “So am I.”
     “Do you have any idea of how they’ll respond?”
     “They have been defeated twice now,” Elik replied, opening the door for her and the other Prime Ministers. “It took them nearly six months to gather a second fleet to conquer our world.”
     “Do you believe that there will be another attempt to take Cartise?” Desmond interrupted. “Shouldn’t they have learned their lesson by now?”
     “I wish it were that easy, but the Nevargh are conquerors. Their defeats at our combined hands are likely to only make them more determined.”
     “And you believe that it will take them just six months to mount a new offensive?” Desmond took his seat in the silver vehicle along with the rest of the Ministers.
     “One thing that the battle you’ve won ensured was that their resources are stretched even thinner than before. It will probably be closer to a year before they’re likely to return,” Elik replied once the door to the ground car closed.
     “I understand that you have already begun modifying your existing shipyards for our designs.”
     The vehicle accelerated soundlessly through wide city streets. The ministers realized everything had a slightly violet hue splashed across it.
     “Our shipyards are versatile. The required changes will be finished in one week. Your military has supplied everything we need to build a new force to combat the Nevargh,” the Ferine confirmed.
     “I’m glad to hear that,” Desmond said. “Tell me, Elik: Is your world always this odd color?”
     “_Odd_ color?”
     “I apologize for my compatriot,” Mathis interjected, in his Parisian accent. “The sky of our world is a light blue. We’re not used to the violet sky here. Personally, I think it’s lovely.”
     “Thank—you,” Elik said, eyeing the deflated Desmond.
     “How long will it be until we can expect the first new ships off the line?” Linda asked. They continued to roll through wide boulevards, walled in by ancient buildings made of clay—colored brick.
     “Our engineers have said that we can expect the first six thousand capital ships in about a year. Your smaller support craft are easier to manufacture. We can expect the first of them in three months.”
     “I’m curious, Elik,” Ahmed said, looking at the edifices passing by his window. “Your buildings are ancient by our standards. Don’t misunderstand me, Elik, they’re marvelous, but how is it that they have stood for so long?”
     “The Wallick asked similar questions when they visited our planet. We haven’t had a war in a thousand years. As a result, our buildings may get replaced, but are rarely destroyed.”
     “I see,” Ahmed said and continued to appreciate the ancient structures as they passed by the car’s windows.
     “Yes,” Desmond said, again taking the initiative, “you do realize that we don’t have the military staff to populate that many new warships.”
     “I know, Prime Minister,” Elik said. “We are in the process of training our people.”
     “Elik,” Linda said. “I don’t want to seem arrogant, but I think that you would agree that our military officers would be better equipped to train your people on our equipment and ships.”
     “Yes, yes, of course,” Elik conceded. “I will inform Dorna that this is one of her tasks to work out with Admiral Peterson.”
     “Can we expect any word or help from former members of the Old League?” Desmond asked.
     “I honestly don’t know,” Elik replied. They arrived at a Coliseum that had been completed over a thousand years ago. The ancient structure was one of the few surviving buildings of a war that had decimated the Ferine race over a millennium beforehand. “In the past they believed that we couldn’t help them. We are aware that there are active resistances to the Nevargh, but none of them have contacted us.”
     “Why not?” Linda asked as they stepped out of the vehicle.
     “Apparently, we haven’t been sufficiently war like enough for them.”
     “Well,” Desmond began, pausing to light a pipe in the open air, “maybe we can change that.”



     “I thought we were coming back as heroes,” Ranik said. He disembarked from a shuttle and onto a tarmac in the Cartise capital. They had received Elik’s request to return for debriefing the moment the battle had finished.
     Lathiel looked around the empty landing pad. “I doubt there was time for a welcome home party, Ranik. We did just come out of a battle our people thought we couldn’t win.”
     “Fair enough, but we were the ones who found the Humans and made peace with them. Don’t forget we also made them into allies,” Ranik said before he spotted a silver ground vehicle speeding towards their shuttle. “Here they are.”
     Elik jumped out of the vehicle and approached them at a fast pace. “I’m sorry,” he said, out of breath. “I had to welcome our new government. They had a lot of questions.”
     “I’m not surprised. They were the same way with us,” Ranik said of their mutual acquaintances.
     “It is good to see you again,” Elik said to Lathiel, giving him a strong pat on his shoulder and a deep growl. “I missed my Scholars partner.”
     “Likewise,” Lathiel said with a sharp—toothed smile. “Where are the Prime Ministers?”
     “I’m putting them and the Senate in the Anteaus Coliseum,” Elik said.
     “The Anteaus?” Ranik repeated. “No one’s used it in years. Wasn’t it condemned?”
     “It’s not condemned,” Elik replied, defensively. “It’s just not in very good condition.”
     “Are you trying to insult them?”
     “It is all we have available,” Elik replied. “I already have workers there improving the state of the building and I resent your implication.”
     “This is why I always prefer that you deal with him,” Ranik said to Lathiel.
     “You just like to argue with me, Ranik. Just because I graduated from Administration and you dropped out,” Elik began.
     “I’m not mediating between you two,” Lathiel interrupted. “Ranik, if you want me to deal with him, then let me deal with him.”
     Ranik remained silent rather than begin an argument.
     “You have to admit that this does sound a lot like what the Council did to you when you asked for a command center,” Lathiel said.
     “It’s best for them to be kept out of sight while the public gets used to this new Alliance and this new government,” Elik said. “Now I need you two to advise me since you have had the most dealings with this Human species.”
     “You want us as advisers!” Ranik exclaimed. “Can you stand to have me in the same room that long?”
     “It’s only temporary. If you want to refuse-,”
     “Not at all,” Ranik interjected with delight. “I’d be glad to _advise_ you.”
     “Okay, Ranik,” Lathiel said. “Let’s move on. Where do you need us?”
     “I’m going to need you to help me in dealing with this new government. I’m not big on politics,” Elik replied.
     “You’re a bureaucrat,” Ranik remarked. “I would think that you’d be delighted.”
     “I enjoy administration, not backroom plotting.”
     “I need to get some rest first,” Lathiel interjected. “I’m tired.”
     “Of course,” Elik said. “The shuttle will take you back to your home.”
     “Thank—you,” Lathiel said, and left the conversation for the shuttle’s interior.
     “He’s changed,” Elik observed while he watched the young Ferine board the small ship.
     “How so?” Ranik inquired.
     “He’s more self—confident than before,” Elik replied, “and more willful.”
     “Disappointed?”
     “I was just making an observation.”
     “You’re still arrogant, Elik. If you want my advice,” Ranik said, stopping for a moment to grin, “and you do. You should realize that the Alliance ministers aren’t going to go away.”
     “Don’t you have somewhere you need to go?”
     “I’m going to the command center.”
     “Shouldn’t you need rest at your age?”
     “Shouldn’t you?” Ranik asked.
     “I’ve got too much to do,” Elik said.
     “And you need an adviser. I’m free at the moment while Lathiel recuperates.”
     “If you insist,” Elik said. He began a walk back to the vehicle he had vacated minutes before. Ranik cheerfully followed behind him.


----------



## powerskris

The second novel is up now. Visit my website for more information and yes, I will be posting the rest of the first chapter over the next few days!


----------



## powerskris

“Admiral Peterson?”
            “Yes?” Maria said before stopping at the sight of a six-foot tall Ferine woman standing near her command chair. She had a dark hue to her skin and watched Maria with bright copper eyes. 
            “I’m Dorna,” she began in a sultry, almost gravelly voice. “You asked for a liaison from the Ferine Assembly.”
            “You’re the liaison?” Maria regarded a pair of long, intricate earrings hanging from Dorna’s earlobes.
            “Is that an issue for you, Admiral?”
            “No,” Maria replied, still scrutinizing the majestic lady clothed in a red, willowy suit, “not at all. I just expected someone different.”
            “Different?”
            “To be honest, I expected a scientist from your council.”
            “I am a scientist, I assure you.”
            “I believe you, you’re just not what I envisioned. I expected someone,” Maria began.
            “Wearing a lab coat?” Dorna finished.
            “Something like that. I’ve arranged quarters for you aboard the ship.”
            “Thank—you, Admiral.”
            “Do you need time to settle in?”
            “No, I do need to relay our colonies’ request for reinforcements, though.”
            “I thought you’d make that request,” Maria said more confidently, now that she could rely on matters of business. “We can dispatch five hundred gunships to each of your other colonies for now. Is that sufficient?”
            “I believe that will meet the Assembly’s needs for now. There is also the issue of training our people to use your equipment and take part in your military.”
            “Yes, I’ll have a list of senior officers by tomorrow who can organize the academies necessary to train your people. Are there any volunteers?”
            “You’d be surprised at our people’s willingness to learn, Admiral. There are already thousands of Ferine who have signed up to crew your new ships.”
            “I just hope they’ll be trained by the time we need them,” Maria mused.
            “Admiral, it’s Ferine tradition that the beginning of any new venture between two parties should be celebrated.”
            “That’s your tradition, not mine,” Maria replied.
            “I promise it will be very informal and small.”
            “All the more reason to cancel,” Maria said.
            “Is this really that much of an imposition?”
            “Yes.”
            “I’m sorry to have bothered you.”
            “Not a problem,” Maria said. She returned to examining updates on her link.
            “But it is a tradition.”
            “I’m very busy.”
            “I would have to issue a statement to the Senate that you were uncooperative with their new ally,” Dorna said.
            Maria’s link fell into her lap. “You really want me to go to your party, don’t you?”
            “I’ll make it so it’s just me and you. How does that sound?” Dorna asked.
            “Fine, I’ll go if it’s that important.”
            “I guarantee that you’ll have a good time. I’ll even open up a bottle of Ruby Brandy,” Dorna said with a smile.
            “I don’t drink.”
            “You do now,” Dorna said.
            “I’ll have one glass.”
            “Once you taste it, you’ll want more.”
            “Look, Dorna,” Maria said and found herself stopped by the teasing smile on Dorna’s face. “You’re infuriating!”
            “I’ve been told that.”
            “That may work on others but-”
            “We can talk about it at the party,” Dorna said with a soft pat on her shoulder. Maria looked at her disturbed shoulder before responding.
            “I think there are some personal boundaries we should discuss as well.”
            “I’ll settle into my quarters now, Admiral,” Dorna said and walked towards the exit from the bright bridge. Just as she arrived at the door she turned and addressed Maria again. “We will definitely discuss personal boundaries, Admiral. We’ll discuss how to expand yours.”
            The doors closed behind her before Maria could respond.


----------



## powerskris

*New Scene*

            Elik stopped into the Anteaus Coliseum the following day to see how the Senate and the Prime Ministers were adjusting to their new accommodations. He left Ranik behind with instructions that he needed to bring Lathiel up to speed on writing their reports for the last several months in the field. The reality was that he was glad to be rid of the old Ferine following him around with a self—satisfied smile, even if it was for only a few hours.
            He nearly turned around and retreated once he saw Prime Minister Desmond Green marching towards him.
            “Mister Elik, just the man I needed to see.”
            “Yes, Prime Minister? Is there anything I can do for you?” Elik asked, half—heartedly.
            “I’ve been discussing this with my colleagues and we have been wondering. Have you ever attempted to negotiate with the Nevargh?”
            “Negotiate?”
            “Yes. We’re not just soldiers, Elik. Some of us are capable diplomats.”
            “We did attempt to negotiate with them several times,” Elik said.
            “And what happened then?”
            “The Nevargh kept promising to stop their invasion, but they just kept annexing more and more systems.”
            “Well, the situation is different now,” Desmond said. He fingered the curious little wooden pipe that he always had on his person. “They’re not as strong as they were before and they’ve been defeated twice now.”
            “I suppose you could try,” Elik allowed.
            “Do you have a direct line that we could use?”
            “The Nevargh have never considered us important enough to set one up.”
            “Well, we’ll work something out,” Desmond said.
            “How are you settling in, Prime Minister? Is the Anteaus to your liking?”
            “I have to admit,” Desmond said, looking around at the ancient stone walls of the building, “it certainly has a sense of history about it.”
            “I’m glad you like it. Is there anything else that I can help you with?”
            “Now that you mention it, we do have a list of requirements.” Desmond passed him a link detailing a lengthy inventory of everything the new government required.
            “I’ll pass it on to the Assembly.”
            “Elik, remember that we are here only to administrate on a federal level. The rest is still up to you.”
            “I’m glad to hear that you are leaving your sense of hierarchical structures behind you,” Elik acknowledged with a brief smile. “If there is nothing more?”
            “No, that’s all.”
            “Good, I need to return to the Assembly,” Elik said and walked towards the exit. It was only once he was back in his shuttle that he allowed his forced smile to disappear. His words were muttered aloud in the silence of the cabin. “Only administrate on a federal level? What does he think that I’ve been doing my entire career?”


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## powerskris

Emperor Xichun thought for a split second that General Sonti was about to murder him. He burst into Xichun’s reception hall at a furious pace. To the Emperor’s relief he shoved a report, rather than a blade, at him.
            “The Ferine are asking to confer with us,” the General said while Xichun examined the report.
            “This says something called the Alliance is asking to speak with us.”
            “That’s what the Ferine Assembly is calling itself now. They have some kind of new race with them. They’re the ones who constructed the new warships that defeated our last fleet,” Sonti said.
            “A new race? From where?”
            “As I told you, there is something in the wastes of the old Pera Empire that wasn’t there before,” Sonti replied. “They call themselves Humans.”
            “What do you need me to do?” Xichun straightened his back on his elegant throne and smoothed the long, purple robes he wore.
            “I’m going to let them speak with you. I want to hear what they have to say, but remember that they are animals as far as you’re concerned and we don’t negotiate with animals.”
            “Yes, I remember,” Xichun said, staring at his lap.
            “Any suggestion of a treaty to end hostilities is not an option. We will meet to discuss terms for surrender.”
            “You would discuss terms for their surrender?” the Emperor repeated, looking up to the General. “You never did before!”
            Sonti responded by placing the scaly index finger of his right hand in the Emperor’s face. “Don’t ever speak to me like that again!”
            The Emperor was agape in shock at the General’s misdirected anger and didn’t reply as soon as Sonti would have preferred. He slapped the side of Xichun’s head with his left hand.
            “What did I say?”
            “I’m sorry, General,” Xichun sputtered. “I didn’t mean any disrespect.”
            “I don’t know what’s the matter with you lately. You haven’t been this impertinent since we deposed you.”
            “I’m sorry, General Sonti. It won’t happen again.”
            “Good, now clean yourself up and do exactly as you’re told.”


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## powerskris

“I’m told to standby for the Imperial Majesty’s signal,” a communications specialist reported from the corner of a room which held the five Prime Ministers. They sat behind a crescent shaped desk facing a large monitor fixed to a stone wall. Since it had been Desmond’s idea to attempt a diplomatic solution, he sat at the center of the table.
            A silver coat of arms bearing an oblong shield and two crossed swords appeared on the screen before changing to the face of a Nevargh with obsidian eyes and dark olive skin. A crown of platinum set with various gemstones sat on his head.
            “We have decided to accept your request for an audience,” the Nevargh said. “We are Emperor Xichun the Fifth. You may address us as Your Highness the first time and Sir afterwards.”
            “Your Highness,” Desmond said. “My colleagues and I here represent the Alliance which the Ferine Assembly has joined. I am authorized to negotiate on their behalf as well.”
            “You are the Humans who constructed the battle fleet now defending Cartise?”
            “Yes, Sir,” Desmond replied.
            “And the rest of these people are your adjutants, We presume?”
            “You misunderstand, Sir. The other four people here are my equals,” Desmond said.
            “Your Highness may call us Prime Minister,” Linda interjected.
            The Emperor gave her a cold stare before returning his attention to Desmond. “If you represent the Ferine, why aren’t there any in your council?”
            “We are having elections soon, Sir,” Desmond said. “The faces you see now may change very soon.”
            “The chaos of democracy,” Xichun remarked.
            “We did ask the Ferine to have a delegate present but they seem to believe that speaking with Your Highness at all would be a waste of time,” Ahmed Abraham said.
            “They’re probably right,” Xichun said and paused before adding, “Prime Minister.”
            “Then why did you consent to this meeting, Sir?” Linda asked.
            “Out of curiosity. Why have you contacted us?”
            “My colleagues and I believe that it is possible to come to a mutually acceptable compromise in light of recent events,” Desmond said. “I believe you to be a reasonable person, Sir.”
            “We certainly are. We would be glad to accept your surrender and we will discuss any terms you have in mind.”
            “I’m afraid we aren’t ready to surrender just yet,” Desmond replied. “We were hoping that we could come to a peace agreement.”
            “My Empire does not negotiate peace agreements. It was more than fair of us just to accept terms of surrender from you.”
            “I take it you are immovable on this, Sir?” Linda asked.
            “That would be correct, Prime Minister.”
            “Could we at least maintain a line of communication should things change?” Desmond asked. The emperor looked off screen for a moment before replying.
            “Yes, we can accept that you will have to surrender at some point, and we would welcome a chance to expedite the process.”
            “Good Day, Your Highness,” Desmond said. The emperor gave him a quick nod before the screen went dark.
            “We could try again in a week or so,” Desmond said to his colleagues.
            “I doubt it would do any good,” Kim Yung said.
            “I’m with the Ferine,” Laurier Mathis said in his French accent. “This whole exercise is a waste of time.”
            “Now there is always a chance,” Desmond interjected.
            “A simple vote will decide this,” Linda said. “All for continued diplomatic negotiations with the Nevargh Empire?”
            “Now let’s not be too hasty,” Desmond stuttered as four hands went up.
            “All against?” Linda asked.
            Desmond said nothing more but raised a single hand in opposition to the motion.
            “Motion carried,” Linda said.
            “Can we at least agree to keep a line open to the Empire?” Desmond implored. The other four members looked at each other with nods of approval.
            “Yes, Desmond. I think we can at least agree to that.”


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## powerskris

“What do you think, General?” Xichun asked once the images of the beings without scales and pink skin disappeared from the large screen mounted to the opposite wall above the entryway.
            “They are not at all like the Ferine,” the General said, crossing his arms. He raised a hand to his dark green chin and considered the situation. “Maybe I have things backwards. The Humans may be in control of the Ferine and not vice versa.”
            “May I ask why, General?”
            “They’re more resilient. I’d even say they have an aggressive edge to them,” General Sonti replied. “This changes things. We’ll have to gather together a much larger fleet if we‘re to take the last Ferine colonies.”
            “That will take longer than the proposed eight months, General.”
            “The reports I saw indicated the bulk of their fleet is composed of much smaller ships. If we could assemble an armada of our larger capital ships-”
            “Then we could overwhelm their forces.”
            “You’re right, Xichun. It will take a year to assemble a force like that. I’ll draft the order immediately for your signature.”
            “Of course, General.”



            Joshua Hubbard barely managed to stumble into his quarters after a long day on the _AWS Horizon_. He had just spent nearly twelve hours drafting orders for the creation of a new fleet. On top of that, he also had to gather the manpower needed for several academies to train legions of willing Ferine. Their schedule was so full that they hadn’t the time to get to the task of rebuilding the brass, which was currently comprised of two people: Maria and him.
            Joshua was looking forward to a quiet dinner with his wife before going to bed. Madison had the night shift now due to the shortage of senior officers and he had missed seeing her as often as he was used to. He had a tired but warm smile on his face when he saw her on the couch. Rather than watching the INN, which was far too distant a signal to receive, Madison was playing a movie about an Earth of the far future where all of mankind was involved in a telekinetic war.
            He saw the saddened look on her face as he sat down beside her.
            “Sad movie?”
            “It’s really pretty exciting,” she said. “I thought it would distract me, but I don’t think anything can.”
            “What’s wrong?”
            “I’m surprised you’d have to ask that,” she said and then looked at his concerned face. “Aren’t you wondering what happened to Eli and Nadine?”
            “Maria’s keeping me really busy so I haven’t had time to think about it.”
            “Really?” Madison asked.
            “Okay, you got me. Even with everything we’ve been doing, I can’t help it. We’ve had barely a second of peace since we got here, but if I have a second to think, I’m thinking about what happened to them.”
            “We left them, Josh,” she said with a broken voice. “I can’t stop thinking about what kind of death we condemned them to.”
            “No one said they died,” Joshua said in an attempt to console his wife.
            “You know what their chances were.”
            “I know that Eli is smart; so is Nadine. I’m sure they’re alive.”
            “I,” she began as a tear fell down her cheek. “I don’t want to spend years hoping they’re alive only to find out that they’re dead when we go back.”
            “Do you want us to have a funeral?”
            “No. I don’t know what I want right now,” she said, doing her best to hold back more tears.
            “Hey, hey,” Joshua said. He put an arm around her and spoke to her in his soothing Southern accent. “Stop it or you’ll get me started.”
            Madison snorted in response and wiped her eyes. “I’d hate to see you cry like a baby.”
            “I’ll get supper tonight, okay?”
            “I could use something a little stronger than coffee with my meal,” Madison said.
            “We’ve got a pretty big store of wine on board. I’m sure I can get a hold of a bottle.”
            “I’ll put a salad together,” Madison said.
            “No, you sit right there and enjoy your movie.”
            Madison responded with a smile. She pulled her legs up under her and settled in to watch the rest of the film while Joshua floundered around the kitchen.


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## powerskris

And that's the end of Chapter One for the second novel!


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## Caragula

Can I also ask why you're posting such a huge volume of work?  Are you after any specific feedback? Or are you after an edit of everything you're posting? Or are you just posting something for us to enjoy?  If the latter that's fine, but it seems like an extended advert for your book, in which case I'd respect you more if you just came out and said it.

For what it's worth it does flow along, it's VERY plot driven, to the exclusion of all else, so I found it tiring.  You have a clean style, I can see how it would be popular with the 40k crew, and no, that's not a veiled criticism


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## powerskris

Caragula: I went over this several times with other people on this forum in the past and I'm just plain tired of answering the same questions over and over again. So you know what? I'm not doing it again, but thanks for the criticism.


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## Caragula

Fair enough.  I looked back through the thread before posting my comment, thinking someone may have raised similar questions, but your posts just reference the end of the thread, and I didn't see any response to the previous questions as such.  Apologies.  I'm not averse to having a deeper look at it, but you've already published part of what you've posted.  Were you after critique of the second novel's excerpts?  I wasn't sure because it wasn't made clear in the thread.  I also hope that you aren't referring to any commenters on this forum as the jealous haters you've identified in your blog, as they all seem pretty reasonable.


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## powerskris

Okay Caragula, I can see you're very determined!

There were responses to these questions here and on other threads but I deleted the replies on this thread as it hadn’t been an issue in well over a year.

However, since you are so insistent, I will reply to your questions in full right here and I will add a short FAQ at the beginning of the thread. 

So let's start right from the very beginning of your first post:

Question: _"Can I also ask why you're posting such a huge volume of work?" _

Answer: You actually believe it to be huge? There are twenty chapters in each of my novels, so each of these chapters represent only five percent of the entire novel. I originally posted about sixty percent of the first novel here and that was from the pre-edit version. There was something like a hundred thousands words in all of the different posts here originally. Why did I post all of that? Because people asked for more, of course!

_"Are you after any specific feedback?"_

Sure. Always. If people want to offer feedback on characters, plot, description, etc. they are always welcome to.

_"Or are you after an edit of everything you’re posting?"_

No. I’ve already edited both novels. They’ve also been professionally proofread by a retired English teacher. They are both published. I don’t need an editor. It’s a little too late for that!

"_Or are you just posting something for us to enjoy?"_

Yup. Over 10,000 views can’t be wrong. I like to think that at least a few of them enjoyed it.

Statement: "_If the latter that's fine, but it seems like an extended advert for your book, in which case I'd respect you more if you just came out and said it."_

My comments: You’re right, it does. If you don’t respect me because of it, I won’t lose any sleep over it.

"_For what it's worth it does flow along, it's VERY plot driven, to the exclusion of all else, so I found it tiring. You have a clean style, I can see how it would be popular with the 40k crew, and no, that's not a veiled criticism."_

40k crew? As in 40,000 word novel? No, my friend. These are 110,000 plus novels and which excerpt were you referring to?

"_Fair enough. I looked back through the thread before posting my comment, thinking someone may have raised similar questions, but your posts just reference the end of the thread, and I didn't see any response to the previous questions as such."_

Again, I will rectify this by posting a FAQ at the beginning of this thread. A lot of my answers were deleted over time, because no one has asked these questions in a very long time.

"_Were you after critique of the second novel's excerpts?"_

Critique away! I won’t hold you back! 

_ "I wasn't sure because it wasn't made clear in the thread."_

This is a writer’s forum. Not a proofreader’s forum. Not an editor’s forum. I’m always looking for input on plotlines, character development, dialogue, etc. 

_ "I also hope that you aren't referring to any commenters on this forum as the jealous haters you've identified in your blog, as they all seem pretty reasonable."_

Which comments are you referring to?


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## powerskris

Just dropping in to let everybody know that the third novel in the series lands today! I have a great new artist that did the cover. Here it is:


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## powerskris

*Excerpt*

AND, here is the prologue to the third novel, Flight for the Ancients:

(for more information, visit my website)

*Prologue*

The Deep Night Station resembled a B-movie silver saucer hanging in the night. Doctor Badis had agreed to meet the Nevargh here. They had tried to insist on a more private location where someone might disappear but Badis was smarter than that. He insisted on a public place.

            Badis decided on the station’s most popular bar: Donna’s. She was a drug lord and bar owner. Donna was also Human. He knew that if anything might happen to him, Donna would be incensed at the hated enemy of the Alliance.

            Badis sat in a black booth and watched the Keyna dancers on an elevator of sexuality placed in the middle of the room. The platforms they danced on continuously descended into the floor only to have another appear out of the high ceiling. The moment you missed the curves or muscles of one dancer, another appeared making you forget the last.

            “Paxian,” a scaly, grey Nevargh in a black single-suit said.

            The doctor had been so enthralled by the red-skinned dancers that Badis had not noticed the Nevargh’s arrival at his table.

            “My name is Doctor Badis,” he said, widening his large, green eyes in irritation.

            “So sorry, Doctor. Which one is your home world: Pax Majoria or Pax Minor?”

            “Why do you care?”

            “Just wondering.”

            “My family comes from Pax Minor.”

            “Ah, new blood, new ideas,” the Nevargh remarked, nodding. “Can I sit down?” 

            “I’d know your name first,” Badis said.

            “My name isn’t any of your concern. Our business is the only thing that should matter to you. Now can I sit down or not?”

            Badis nodded and took a sip from a crimson drink he had purchased twenty minutes earlier. The Nevargh sat down across from him in the dark booth.

            “Good choice of seating. It’s public, but far enough away from the entertainment that we’re likely to go unnoticed. It’s also good for me in that Nevargh aren’t normally welcome here.”

            “I thought you might know about Donna. You still made it in I see.”

            “I had to bribe them with a hundred Sterling for one hour in this hole and it took me a while to find you. That brown skin of yours nearly blends in with the booth but those big heads of yours are easy to spot,” the Nevargh said and looked around the bar before settling his gaze on the dancers. He looked back to the doctor after ogling the Keyna for a moment. “This bar isn’t all bad.”

            “The Keyna, I know. They’re nearly hypnotic, aren’t they?”

            “They’d be alluring clothed. In the nude, they’re enthralling. The most attractive race out here.”

            “And the richest,” Badis said.

            “As you soon will be.”

            “I thought they’d send a soldier, or a squad of soldiers.”

            “I’d never get in dressed like that. Now, do you have the optidrive?”

            Badis took a clear rod from his  pocket and placed it next to his drink.

            “One million sterling.”

            The Nevargh took a fat purse of coins from his coat and put it on the table in front of him.

            “Well, well, what do we have here?” a voice asked. The two of them looked up to see a round Human woman with platinum blond hair.

            “Donna?” Badis asked.

            “A Paxian and Nevargh trash,” Donna replied for him.

            “I’m just here on business.”

            “You are bad for business,” Donna said to the Nevargh.

            “It’s never wise to insult a member of the Nevargh Empire.”

            “We’re not in the Empire. We are in unclaimed space and I don’t deal with your kind,” Donna said.

            “I paid for an hour.”

            “You paid the wrong person. Why shouldn’t I have my men kick you out on your scaly ass right now?”

            “Like all Humans, you have a way with words,” the Nevargh replied.

            “Not good enough.” Donna motioned for her guards.

            “Look, Donna. What would it take for just another five minutes?”

            “Five hundred Sterling.”

            “Done.”

            “And I take that rod for safekeeping,” Donna added.

            “That’s why I’m here. I can’t leave without it.”

            “That’s not my problem.”

            “Another five hundred for the rod to stay on the table.”

            Donna nodded and the Nevargh fetched ten One Hundred Sterling coins from a pocket in his black jacket. The coins jingled as they piled into her hand.

            “You’ve got five minutes,” Donna said and retreated from the table with her guards in tow.

            “I have an idea of why you’d want this information,” Badis said now that they were alone again.

            “Oh, really?”

            “I don’t have any other buyers. You don’t have to be worried.”

            “I’m not.”

            “Then we have nothing more to talk about. My research has only a few references to the outpost anyway. It never did me any good,” Badis said.

            “I thought so.” The Nevargh pushed the bag of Sterling towards him. Badis took the purse and placed the rod in front of him.

            The Nevargh took the rod and left the table. Badis noticed that Donna monitored his exit from the bar before returning to her private floor above. He then took the bag and confirmed that there were dozens of Ten Thousand Sterling coins in it.

            He decided to wait for a while before leaving. Badis didn’t want to be jumped by any Nevargh on the way out in an attempt to retrieve the king’s ransom they had just given him. Donna would probably be able to point him in the direction of a few good mercenaries like the Deadly Suns who would have the firepower to cover his exit. She might even lend him a few of her own considering who he wanted protection from. 
            After he left, he was going to buy a ship from the local merchant. Badis had always wanted to explore the galaxy and the money he had just acquired would ensure him a retirement spent exploring the ruins of ancient civilizations on a hundred different worlds. A few sales of antiquities here and there would keep him going to the day of his death. 

            “Another one,” Badis said to a passing Gundar waitress. He responded to her frown with a raised Twenty Sterling coin. She smiled and raced to bring him a drink.

            A new glass filled with a crimson liquid arrived at the table and the Gundar waitress’ silver spaghetti-sized tentacles wriggled with happiness once she received the generous tip. Badis got up from the booth and brought his drink to the free-standing circular table around the dancers continuing to descend into the floor.



            Outside the silver station, a small Nevargh shuttle detached from a docking port and flew out to a point some hundred thousand miles away. Once it decelerated to zero, it sent a signal into space.
            Less than five minutes later, a small fleet of Nevargh warships jumped into the space between the shuttle and the antique station. Sixty grey scouts escorted several destroyers and a single, great battleship. It oriented itself to face the station and the battleship’s support vessels stayed close to its gargantuan wings and heavy battle modules.
            The fleet opened up with every weapon at its disposal a moment later.



            The red devils stopped dancing once they felt the first tremor. Badis followed their stares to the ceiling. At first, he didn’t realize that there was anything wrong with the slight shudder he had felt, but the dancers knew their home well.

            A second tremor was more pronounced and the dancers began to grip the railings in front of them in hopes that they could exit the elevator once it was below the deck. The next tremor caused a heavy explosion on the third floor which sent shrapnel across the bar. Several dancers threw caution to the wind and jumped from their descending platforms.

            Most of the patrons panicked and flocked for the exit. Everyone believed that someone was attacking the bar and wanted to get out of the establishment. None of them could conceive of the idea that the entire station was under attack.

            “No!” Badis got up from his stool. His crimson drink toppled over from a severe hit to the hull and emptied its contents across the table. Drops of red began to collect into a small pool on the floor.
            He joined the rest of the crowd trying to leave the bar. Badis grabbed the link from his pocket and clutched it in one hand.

            “Not over this, _not over this!_” Badis said, wishing the exit was much closer.



            Several ships attempting to leave the station were shot down by the Nevargh Scouts before they were able to get away. The rest were destroyed before they could enter FTL and some level of safety.
            Particle beams and torpedoes tore through the station’s hull even as it attempted a weak resistance. The Deep Night station had weathered centuries of warfare but its quiet observation of the universe was finally ending. Maintenance workers managed to shut down the old station’s power core before it went critical, but it didn’t stop the Nevargh fleet from blowing the station to pieces.
            Now that their work was done, the Nevargh task force turned away from the burning debris that was all that remained of the Deep Night Station. The Nevargh warships’ Faster-Than-Light emitters flashed a white light and they vanished from that part of the galaxy.


----------

