# Those curious, un-punctuated mottoes.



## Olly Buckle (Mar 21, 2014)

You must have seen them, it seems some feel that if you put everything in upper case and huge then stick it on a pole or a wall there is no need for punctuation, it’s loudness defies ambiguity, like shouting at foreigners. Not so, for example... POLICE FOLLOW THIS VAN ...what is this? A straight definition of a policeman, someone who can not help himself but to follow this van; WISE SHOPPERS GO TO BLANKS, but, POLICE FOLLOW THIS VAN.
Perhaps on the other hand it is a directive aimed at police officers, my experience of them suggests that POLICE PLEASE FOLLOW THIS VAN might get better results, on the other hand it might not. Is the van driven by a criminal so blatant that he boasts about it?

Then there is POLICE ACCIDENT, why are they always having accidents? Sometimes it seems as though every accident is a police accident, and there are a lot more unmarked police cars having them than one would think.

It said LADIES, so I went in and looked and sure enough there they were.

BILL STICKERS IS INNOCENT


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## Ariel (Mar 22, 2014)

Those are rather ambiguous.


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## Olly Buckle (Mar 25, 2014)

Announcements are unpunctuated.
“Keep your luggage with you at all times luggage left unattended is likely to be removed and may be damaged or destroyed by the security services.”
Put the commas where you wish, the announcer’s voice gives no clue.
Luggage left unattended has always been liable to removal, thieves have been around since forever, that it then gets damaged, or even destroyed, by those supposedly protecting the interests of decent folk ...

Then there is that most annoying of women on the 52 bus who announces at every northbound stop “52 to Willesden bus garridge”. Someone tell her; the word is from French, garage, and has an ‘a’ and no ‘d’.


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## Greimour (Mar 25, 2014)

I seen one:

BEWARE THE DEER

Made me laugh. We drove past a wooded area and I spotted it as we approached a bend. I couldn't help imagining a terrifying deer that might attack and eat us if we aren't careful. It was accompanied with an image of a car crashing into a deer-like stick animal (opposed to a stick man drawing) ... I immediately came to the conclusion the picture was advice on what to do should we come across this terrifying deer. 


I obviously gathered the signs intention : "Be aware of deers crossing the road." but seriously, way to save on  cost of a sign >.<


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## Cran (Mar 25, 2014)

I wonder who keeps leaving those protest signs along the highway - END ROADWORKS

And those entrepreneurial dentists - BRIDGEWORKS AHEAD


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## Greimour (Mar 25, 2014)

Could be worse Olly


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## Olly Buckle (Mar 26, 2014)

SLOW BENDS are boring, but they never label the FAST BENDS

We were on holiday in Ireland once and went down a steep hill on the Dingle peninsular, the bends had signs saying SLOW until we got to the bottom where there was one saying 'SLOWER', as the missus said 'How did they know?'

HEAVY PLANT CROSSING always amuses me that way, Greimour, I always imagine an ent like oak tree.


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## Olly Buckle (Apr 1, 2014)

In a picnic area on the A 21.

POLICE CRIME TEAMS OPERATE IN THIS AREA.

Bad enough with the ordinary criminals without the police joining in; mob handed.


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## A_Jones (Apr 1, 2014)

I HATE road signs.  I always want to correct them.  Its the adverbs mostly.  DRIVE SLOW.....ly.   UGh!


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## Greimour (May 1, 2014)

Hahaha, I seen one the other day:

Vets4Pets

I would so love a vet for a pet... I wonder what breeds you get, I hope it has all it's certificates. I will see how much one with CertAVP (Animal Welfare, Ethics and Law) costs. A pedigree like that is probably expensive though.


**********



LOL


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## Elvenswordsman (May 1, 2014)

TRAIN CROSSING


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## Olly Buckle (May 29, 2014)

They have illuminated signs on the A21 saying,
TAKE YOUR LITTER HOME WITH YOU OTHER PEOPLE DO.
I object to this on more than one count, firstly, no other people take my litter home, I don't leave it about for them.
More importantly though the i_ntended_ concept is deeply flawed as well, one only has to try substituting other things for 'Take your litter home' to see this.
Beat small children, other people do
Become a suicide bomber, other people do
The fact that other people do something does not make it right, as his teacher must have said to him,

"And if he had told you to go to the sixteenth floor, climb on the roof, and jump off, would you?"
"No, Sir."
"Right, you are responsible for your own actions boy"

Why was it always the 'sixteenth' floor?


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## Kepharel (May 29, 2014)

Olly Buckle said:


> They have illuminated signs on the A21 saying,
> TAKE YOUR LITTER HOME WITH YOU OTHER PEOPLE DO.


 

I don't know what my dog would make of it either


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## Olly Buckle (May 30, 2014)

Their other one is 'Think twice think bike save a life' (I found that quite difficult to write without commas). My objection to that is that one is not saving a life, but failing to take one. "Think twice, think bike. Don't take  life." would surely be a stronger message. In my experience the pain they have caused another is the thing that affects people most  if they have been in a collision, the ephemeral, abstract notion of 'saving' an unspecified and unknown life mean nothing. Make people  think, how would people feel if they killed a young biker, even if he was a bad boy gang member and it was half his fault my guess id they would feel pretty awful, he won't be growing a bit more mature and becoming a responsible citizen like most do.


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## midnightpoet (May 30, 2014)

This reminds me of product safety warnings.  For example, on a coffee pot:"Do not use this appliance for other than intended use."  Duh.  I think the writers of these assume everyone is a moron (although, sometimes I wonder...).  I guess if you used it to brew tea it might burn the house down.  You could plant flowers in the carafe'. Another on the same list: "Avoid contact with any moving parts."  On a coffee pot?


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## W.Goepner (May 31, 2014)

I want to make a book on Ahead analogies.

First, (My favorite) Roadwork Ahead. I read that as, taking your head and doing road work like exercises with it. What do you do, take it off and dribble it?

Second, Stop Ahead; If you do this, does the body keep going?

Third, Speed zone Ahead; Damn heads, always flying by me like I am standing still.

Forth, Curve Ahead; Here's the windup, there's the pitch, whoa! check out that curve ball.

Fifth, Bump Ahead; Please! Any one else in the car, but! the drivers.

Sixth, Dip Ahead; In what, Hot fudge, Strawberry crackle, What?


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## Olly Buckle (Sep 25, 2014)

"Disabled Parking"

What did they do? Drop a tank trap in it? Dig a hole in it?


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## LeeC (Sep 25, 2014)

Olly Buckle said:


> "Disabled Parking"
> 
> What did they do? Drop a tank trap in it? Dig a hole in it?



Now where the heck am I going to park 

Of course, if one has a really weird mind they might balk at those signs on public buildings:

Service Dogs Only


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## Cran (Sep 25, 2014)

*Must be those triffids I read about ...*







Now, why do I have to caution heavy plants? Isn't that a job for the weed police?


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## W.Goepner (Sep 26, 2014)

Greimour said:


> I seen one:
> 
> BEWARE THE DEER
> 
> ...



This reminds me of the lady that lives along highway 20. She called into the radio station and tells them, how when she moved into the neighborhood she thought it was nice for them to mark the "Deer Crossings". Then after being in the area a while she discovered that they needed to remove the signs, I quote " I think they need to remove these signs, because the deer keep getting hit and I do not think it is safe for them to be crossing there."


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## Olly Buckle (Jun 11, 2015)

Tonbridge and Malling borough council has been putting out signs saying:-

Take your litter home with you other people do.

That is wrong in so many ways. Why would other people want my litter to take home with them? If they take home it how can I? 
Even if I accept it in the way it is intended there is as much logic in it as 'Mother knows best'; punctuate and try some other injunctions with it:-

Become a child molester, other people do.

Betray your best friend, other people do.

Makes me feel like throwing litter every time I see it, luckily I am not tht sort of person.


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## Olly Buckle (Jul 26, 2015)

There was a report about a man eaten by alligators after reading the un-punctuated notice,

NO SWIMMING ALLIGATORS IN WATER

Watch out for the flying ones !


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