# If You Were Going to Write a Love Letter



## curtis (Jul 24, 2015)

If you were going to write a love letter, what would you include in the content? Would you tell her why she is unique to you? What makes her special?


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## InstituteMan (Jul 24, 2015)

It would depend upon what I thought would make her feel loved. 

You ask about a love letter to a woman, but there's not a generic woman for something like that. Heck, even for the same woman, what makes her feel loved will change over time as she changes and as the relationship grows. It's not a one-size-fits-all thing.


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## Boofy (Jul 24, 2015)

I suppose it would depend entirely on the person you are writing to. It's a hard thing to ask, without knowing that much. The content isn't something I can help with. The execution, however, could be all important. I find that there are only so many ways that you can describe a person romantically before you risk bulldozing through cliché central. HOW you say it can be the most exciting and effective part. Sure, you could just write down your feelings for her on paper and put the note in her hand, but aren't there more interesting ways of showing somebody that you know them? That you love them? I had a guy send me on a treasure hunt at 4 in the morning once. He shoved a map and clues through my letter box, and left a parcel of my favourite things at the end. It was zaney and ridiculous and I loved it. It's that sort of thing that can really sweep a girl off of her feet.


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## curtis (Jul 24, 2015)

Boofy said:


> I suppose it would depend entirely on the person you are writing to. It's a hard thing to ask, without knowing that much. The content isn't something I can help with. The execution, however, could be all important. I find that there are only so many ways that you can describe a person romantically before you risk bulldozing through cliché central. HOW you say it can be the most exciting and effective part. Sure, you could just write down your feelings for her on paper and put the note in her hand, but aren't there more interesting ways of showing somebody that you know them? That you love them? I had a guy send me on a treasure hunt at 4 in the morning once. He shoved a map and clues through my letter box, and left a parcel of my favourite things at the end. It was zaney and ridiculous and I loved it. It's that sort of thing that can really sweep a girl off of her feet.



I like the treasure hunt idea. That sounds entertaining. Regarding the letter, I think she would like to know why she is different from other women. I should let her know why she is unique. I think that would resonate.


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## musichal (Jul 24, 2015)

Dear Christine,

My love, it has been too long since I wrote you a letter.  Why would I?  Here we are, seeing each other day after day, year after year.  I tell you every day that I love you - we have no need of letters.  Besides, they are hopelessly out of style these days... but we are getting older and out of style, too, so maybe a letter does make sense, for us.

Perhaps if I could write like Danielle Steel I'd make your heart melt, but we must make do with my own heart-felt lines to you.  Yes, you know I love you for I tell you so each day, but there are a few more things which I think that I should say, for I never tell you why, do I?

You remain so beautiful, despite the years, and the wrinkles on your face are in just the right places - laughter lines that speak of joy, of happiness and a healthy lust for life.  When you slip into that black silk dress which still fits after all these years even the young men turn their heads to watch you pass, and they are so enthralled by the vision they don't notice me beside you watching them until they've had an eyeful, then they blush at being caught.  I think, good luck to you buddy, that's right, you don't find one like this every day.  Most eighteen year-old girls couldn't get away with wearing that form-fitting design, but you walk in looking like a fashion model on a runway.

And your black, black hair - no grey at all - natural color, curly and long, is your glory.  Women just don't look like this at your age, but you were blest by angels, or God, or genetics, or - I think - all three.  Blest in proportion to your heart.  Your saucy, sexy good looks are the icing on the cake (I eat you up), but it is your heart, your perspective and demeanor I most love.

I love to watch you play with the grandkids, or even with Jumper.  Your moves and facial expressions, your true delight and patience, your fun make me see the little girl with twelve brothers and sisters, a daddy in jail and a mother working hard as a full-time waitress, and at home, the farm.  I see that little girl who never had many toys, or new clothes, who adopted and loved a little mouse, and my heart aches for her.  Growing up, the oldest of all those children, taking care of each one and loving them all with a devotion sometimes not returned.

It is that caring, that devotion which won my heart.  I've never known quite such loyalty until I met you, and that has earned more respect from me than I have ever felt for anyone.  That we were born in the same year -experienced the same time in history - made me the luckiest man on the planet once we met.  And though we both wish that had been sooner, it may just be that I had to live through the things I have so that I would recognize your great value when I saw you.

So many people no longer believe in love, or that two can be destined to be one, but we know, don't we?  I knew that I would botch this poor attempt to show my heart to you, but I cannot write prose like Danielle Steel though I suppose that as poorly as I have expressed these thoughts of you the message will somehow trickle through.

all my love,

hal


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## Boofy (Jul 25, 2015)

Hehe. Like I say, it doesn't have to be generic pen to paper, if you want to write her something. Take a pack of playing cards and write down something you love about her on every one. Hide post it notes all over her house. Be creative! It's such a great opportunity to prove how well you know her. Nothing tells a woman that they are special like putting so much of yourself into a declaration like that. If she's the kind of girl who is in love with traditional romance, a plain love letter would probably be the sweetest thing imaginable. I know myself and a lot of my friends go gooey over daft, thoughtful gestures though. Oh, I am a sucker for a good love story. I can't deny it. ^^


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## KLJo (Jul 25, 2015)

Umm..
Show her, don't tell her?

I might be alone in this, but having coffee ready when I get up in the morning is about the most romantic thing I can think of. Trumps a letter. No contest.

Actually, the best "love letter" I ever received was a series of post it notes from the bed to the coffee, and then from the coffee to where he was hiding, because he'd taken the day off to spend with me.


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## musichal (Jul 25, 2015)

Christine thanks _curtis_ for starting this thread.

She also insists I add that if the choice were coffee or my letter, it's the letter, no contest, "I can make my own coffee, but I can't write myself a letter."  She does add that showing is a good idea, too.


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## Crowley K. Jarvis (Jul 25, 2015)

That depends on WHEN I write it.

Are we even dating? Or... a stranger, that doesn't even know I exist?

Or just a friend that isn't aware of my feelings?

'Cuz those would be three very different letters.


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## KLJo (Jul 25, 2015)

This has been rolling around in my brain since my last post. I thought maybe I'd expand on it.

The reason why love letters don't cut it for me is, I think, that they usually feel like a burden. 

First, the person writing them almost always goes too far with their imposition on my suspension of disbelief. "You're the most beautiful girl in the world", "I'm the luckiest man alive", "you/our relationship is like a fine wine that gets better with age." Whatever else might get thrown in to the letters is forced, and, however high my opinion of myself might be, their claims remain statistically improbable.

Then there is the bad ROI. Suppose a person spent an hour writing and perfecting the letter, while my husband spent 3 minutes making me coffee, then 5 minutes telling me how much he loved me, another 10 on some household chore that I hate, but it was my turn to do, and topped it off by rubbing my back and talking for 20 mins while I fell asleep (brag: my amazing husband actually does this every night). He's not only let me know how he felt in 22 mins less, he has actively, tangibly, made my life more enjoyable in the process.

I'm not suggesting you can't ever do both. Some of you may even have 1h38m each day to devote to these, and I say get down with your bad self.  However, if you have to choose one, potential love letter writer, I strongly advise the latter.

I think that love isn't candle-light and flourish. It is the totally amused smile on his face when I high five him after sex, dismount and stick the landing gymnast-style. The way I feel when he rolls out of bed at noon on a lazy Saturday morning and sees breakfast ready and waiting. Or the car he sneaks out and fills because he knows I hate the smell of gasoline. 

And I feel like the minute I write all that down for him to read, I've cheapened it because whether I expect it or not, all his reactions are a type of credit. All professions require thanks or reciprocation. 

I will always choose the laugh, the touch, the protection, the comfort, first. 

If that makes sense?


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## musichal (Jul 25, 2015)

And then there are those of us so ill that doing things - or rather the lack of it - already has us feeling nearly useless at times.  And so I hire things done, one way or another, including a lady twice a week to do cleaning, cooking and laundry chores around the house.  The lady I am with appreciates the letter.


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## escorial (Jul 25, 2015)

never wrote one myself..i guess just write how you feel..you know be yourself jarg....


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## KLJo (Jul 25, 2015)

Just for the record, Hal. None of my responses were directed at you. My discomfort with love letters would only let me give yours a quick skim. It feels like your responses are indicating that you might think I'm taking shots at your different position. That is definitely not what I'm doing. 

One thing about your last post only. Would a significant other really be a credible source to weigh in--to their partner--on love letters vs. actions immediately after receiving the former?

My gut feeling--absolutely no science was performed here-- is that if you could anonymously poll people for the top 10 things they wished their partner did more. "Write me a love letter" would not make the list.


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## walker (Jul 25, 2015)

It depends on the person. I think what you decide to put in the letter will show how well you know the person. One thing I would be careful of, with some people, is praising them for things that they do. Many people want to be loved for who they are, not because they do things that other people find helpful or agreeable.


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## InstituteMan (Jul 25, 2015)

I've been meditating on this topic more, and the first thing I should mention is that, speaking as someone who's been married multiple decades, KLJo has some good relationship advice in this thread.

The second thing I should mention is that I kind of get the whole notion of a guy using the written word to attract women. That's the biggest thing that kept me writing when I was young: when I was in school, girls dug my writing. I liked having girls like me, so I kept writing. I didn't start with love letters, mind you. I wrote poems and stories for classes and just to stay sane. When I shared my writing with girls I looked like a vulnerable artistic guy with keen insights and understanding and such (okay, I was a teenager, so I wasn't all that skilled or insightful, but I tried). After attracting a girl with my other scribblings, I certainly would pen her a love letter--with an actual pen, since this was back in the 80s--but those letters would be part of the budding relationship, not the way the relationship began. 

I guess that some of those love letters "worked" as such things go, but they all worked as part of an actual relationship. Some were very brief relationships, as that is the case for young romance, but I never wrote a girl with just the intention of getting into her pants or something. Sure, I didn't write any love letters to girls I _wasn't_ attracted to, so on some level that was my intention, but I didn't attempt to deploy whatever writing skills I had solely to advance a sexual conquest. I kind of think that the "success" of a love letter depends upon writing it in the context of a relationship instead of just being an out and out attempt at seduction (which will be doomed to fail).

I guess that's more relationship advice than writing advice, but the relationship is what directs this kind of writing.


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## popsprocket (Jul 25, 2015)

I probably wouldn't write a love letter.

I possess enough real charisma that I don't put my foot in my mouth every time I speak to a girl in person, but that charisma doesn't really translate to the page.

Also I'm not big on the cheesy things in relationships.

Shit, I don't even like mozzarella and it has barely any flavour at all.


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## am_hammy (Jul 25, 2015)

I think, that if there were a letter to be given to me, I'd like a little bit of both. Practicality and romance all rolled into one.

Sometimes mushy is cool for the right moment with the right person, but sometimes it's nice to write little notes that talk about how you appreciate that person. Even if it's something as simple as "I like the way you do that". It validates the person, and it can make them be more confident in themselves. Balance is key I think, whether it's in a letter, or showing affection, or doing things for that person. It's all nice really. To echo many others in the thread, it does depend on the person as well and how they are with stuff like that.


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## Mesafalcon (Jul 25, 2015)

Crowley K. Jarvis said:


> That depends on WHEN I write it.
> 
> Are we even dating? Or... a stranger, that doesn't even know I exist?
> 
> ...



This is a key point. 

I would never write a love letter to a girl I have not at least slept with. Girls say they like it, when they already like the guy.

It can come off needy and possibly even creepy to certain people.


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## Angelicpersona (Jul 26, 2015)

My husband and I spent the first year and a half of our relationship living in different countries. The last 5 months before we moved in together we couldn't visit because of schedules, so I went to the card store and got these ridiculously sappy cards with a ton of writing space - enough for one a week, plus these little sparkly heart stickers to stick all over the envelope. And I wrote him one a week for at least 3 of those 5 months.

This is probably going to be different, because we were apart, but I wrote him mostly about how much I missed him, and how much I was looking forward to our life together after we moved in. I wrote to him about things that he had done that had been special to me, and why they were special to me, and why they made me love him. I wrote to him about our relationship, and how it made me feel, and about how happy I was to be with someone like him.

We talked every day on the computer, and almost every day on the phone (he would stay with me on the phone until I fell asleep), but still, writing those letters to him really made our relationship seem even more real.


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## curtis (Jul 31, 2015)

I found a website that describes the characteristics of a good letter. The letter should be personal. The content of a love letter should be so specific to the person receiving it that no one else could mistake it as their own. Secondly, it should be emotional. Remaining focused on positive emotions such as love, hope, and joy, lifts the reader’s spirit. Finally, it should be sincere. The sentiments expressed in your letter must be true and appropriate to the stage of the relationship you are in, if they are to be well-accepted. 

Does that cover everything?


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## Foxee (Jul 31, 2015)

Talk about a subject with endless variations. I love notes but I rarely get them. When we were dating he would write me notes on plain notebook paper, folded up just like the notes kids passed in high school. Since we were both in school at the time and he held down a job as well sometimes it stood in for the time we didn't get to spend together. Even at that the notes were simple, he missed me, he'd talk about things we were both excited about.

I wrote him one memorable one. I noticed that the time he got a parking ticket for not paying the meter outside the group home where he worked in time, it was the exact same color and size as a yellow note card I had. So, of course, I wrote a little note on that and put it under his windshield wiper. There's nothing like temporarily stopping someone's heart and then treating them to a moment of pure exasperation to let them know you love them.

Plus, it was a great wind-up to the realities of marriage.

Other than that I've left all kinds of different notes. One of the recent ones was a trail of post-its that were stuck on his phone, in his wallet, in his lunchbox, etc. He liked that. The simplest one I've left is a single post-it with a heart on which I drew a little smiling face and stick figure arms and feet. He never says which notes are his favortes but I notice he kept that one carefully on the cover of his Bible.

Just write from the heart and don't fear being a bit creative with the delivery.


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## Crowley K. Jarvis (Jul 31, 2015)

I return. Haha. Much wisdom here, there has been. <,< 

Mostly, I simply enjoy saying: 'I write poetry.'  Something about that sentence has a magical effect on girls my age, and thanks to my projects, I actually have a good amount under my belt as physical proof that I'm not fronting. ;P 

As for actual experiences...

My first relationship, a girl with naturally blonde hair just a few shades lighter than mine, and a whole head and a half shorter than me. We couldn't actually meet very often, so we only sent text messages. That may not be a letter, but, you haven't seen a Crowley text message. I sent this girl pages upon pages of my thoughts and feelings toward her.

We went to Six Flags once. She wanted a hat with Taz on it, but REFUSED to let me buy it for her.

But she likes Batman, so I bought her a keychain with the symbol on it, snuck into her room, and left it on top of a notebook, and wrote down: 'It's not much, but here.' 

I've never made a poem for anyone, but next time I probably will.


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## ShadowEyes (Jul 31, 2015)

Jeez, love letter? You know Hemingway, in A Farewell To Arms, has the female character say, "I am nobody. I am you. I'll do whatever you want."

I think as long as you're thoughtful AND developing some type of character revelation (an action that one can do even though one doesn't have to do), the letter should be fine. In Hemingway's story, she's willing to give up her personality, which tells a lot about her personality, so personality is irrelevant. Method is all.

Also I'm drunk, so there's that.


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## popsprocket (Aug 1, 2015)

I can imagine pretty much any one of my exes writing a love letter that was short and to the point, something like "I guess I hate you less than I hate most other people."

So you could always go down that road 

Oh my god why do I like girls who are mean, they're just so... mean! :disturbed:


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## escorial (Aug 1, 2015)

cubcake..just want to let you know that i worship the ground you walk on...look lamb chop you are everything to me..i just want to be your snuggle bunny forever..with all my love...and more..gizz a kiss..xx


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## dale (Aug 1, 2015)

the best love letters make a woman feel like the most valuable piece of sexual property on the market. 
i'm actually an expert at the "love letter". i am a beast at it. it's why i got into writing in the 1st place.


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## aj47 (Aug 1, 2015)

dale said:


> the best love letters make a woman feel like the most valuable piece of sexual property on the market.
> i'm actually an expert at the "love letter". i am a beast at it. it's why i got into writing in the 1st place.



As a woman, I disagree.  I am not property--sexual or otherwise.  A letter like you describe would get tossed--along with the suitor who proffered it.


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## dale (Aug 1, 2015)

astroannie said:


> As a woman, I disagree.  I am not property--sexual or otherwise.  A letter like you describe would get tossed--along with the suitor who proffered it.



lol. basically, all women want to be owned. when a man feels he owns something? his gives up his heart and soul for the deed.


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## aj47 (Aug 1, 2015)

dale said:


> lol. basically, all women want to be owned. when a man feels he owns something? his gives up his heart and soul for the deed.


You are incorrect.  I want to be loved and cherished as a person, not a _thing_. Property is _stuff_​, not people.


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## dale (Aug 1, 2015)

astroannie said:


> You are incorrect.  I want to be loved and cherished as a person, not a _thing_. Property is _stuff_​, not people.



well, that's a very nice sentiment, but not too realistic in today's world, i'm afraid. people seem to be a fairly cheap commodity nowadays. people treat eachother worse than they treat their property in today's world. i'd rather be a chick's property than her "man". women care more about diamonds than love nowadays.


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## TheWonderingNovice (Aug 1, 2015)

Actually, the idea of being owned is quite unnerving. I do not want to be owned, collars are for animals not people. 

Yes, these days people have retreated to 'owning' each other but I do not appreciate that. Relationships are based on an understanding that the individuals are both equal. Once that understanding is gone , fighting start. I know that being territorial is a natural instinct, but this is why we have reason. But thats just me, It seems idealistic but thats how I view love.


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## aj47 (Aug 1, 2015)

dale said:


> well, that's a very nice sentiment, but not too realistic in today's world, i'm afraid. people seem to be a fairly cheap commodity nowadays. people treat eachother worse than they treat their property in today's world. i'd rather be a chick's property than her "man". women care more about diamonds than love nowadays.



Well, I was taught that if you look for it, you will find it.  So, based on what you found, you're looking for all the wrong things.


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## Blade (Aug 1, 2015)

astroannie said:


> You are incorrect.  I want to be loved and cherished as a person, not a _thing_. Property is _stuff_​, not people.



Writing a love letter to a piece of property strikes me as a rather odd idea actually.:scratch: Possibly dale can provide a sample.


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## dale (Aug 1, 2015)

Blade said:


> Writing a love letter to a piece of property strikes me as a rather odd idea actually.:scratch: Possibly dale can provide a sample.



lol. you all are really missing the point and taking the word "property" to be some kind of insulting thing. 
you look at someone and want to possess them. why? because they are worth possessing. if a woman isn't worth
possessing? then she wouldn't even be worth a love letter. i'd just talk shit to seduce her and probably not even
remember her name a week later.


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## KLJo (Aug 1, 2015)

dale said:


> well, that's a very nice sentiment, but not too realistic in today's world, i'm afraid. people seem to be a fairly cheap commodity nowadays. people treat eachother worse than they treat their property in today's world. i'd rather be a chick's property than her "man". *women care more about diamonds than love nowadays*.



...and men care about power, control, and anal sex.

There is some merit to your position. If people did not claim ownership, no one would hate the other women/man. They would only hate the cheater.

But you're never going to be taken seriously if you can't stop blaming the world's problems on others (women), while acknowledging your own (or straight men's) MAJOR, STARRING, role in society.


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## Guy Faukes (Aug 1, 2015)

dale said:


> lol. basically, all women want to be owned. when a man feels he owns something? his gives up his heart and soul for the deed.



Eh, the majority of women want a man who will take initiative and be active during the act, but possession is a shady subject (do not insert 50 Shades of Grey reference here). Some women enjoy certain elements of it, while others do not. The minority enjoy it fully, others not at all, while I think the majority only like to dabble with it with guys that they, at the very least, trust will not abuse or injure them during such.


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## dale (Aug 1, 2015)

KLJo said:


> ...and men care about power, control, and anal sex.
> 
> There is some merit to your position. If people did not claim ownership, no one would hate the other women/man. They would only hate the cheater.
> 
> But you're never going to be taken seriously if you can't stop blaming the world's problems on others (women), while acknowledging your own (or straight men's) MAJOR, STARRING, role in society.



lol. that's funny. i find even the thought of anal sex to be disgusting. why would i wanna stick my dick in feces?
my point is....a committed relationship is basically ownership. you have a claim to that other person. he/she is yours.
no one elses. yours. ain't nothing wrong with that.


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## Guy Faukes (Aug 1, 2015)

Such pot. Much stirring.


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## Pluralized (Aug 1, 2015)

dale said:


> lol. that's funny. i find even the thought of anal sex to be disgusting. why would i wanna stick my dick in feces?
> my point is....a committed relationship is basically ownership. you have a claim to that other person. he/she is yours.
> no one elses. yours. ain't nothing wrong with that.



The longer my relationship lasts (married for almost thirteen years), the more I realize that the initial drive of where I 'stick my dick' has to be subsumed and eventually diluted in the overall effort that goes into the relationship. I do not view my wife as 'property' in any sense, rather I view the relationship as mutual responsibility for which we both must work very hard. The courting process, dating, dealing with the opposite sex outside of long-term relationships, have changed a lot over the years, but the basic tenets that underpin any successful relationship are and will always be respect, compassion, tolerance, and faithfulness. Maybe realizing that and actively doing my part has contributed to my marriage's success. 

To the OP's initial question, what I would include in a love letter is some indication of why I think our paths crossing is significant, how much I adore her, and maybe a paragraph or two on how beautiful the future could be as our love deepens. Sappy, perhaps, but why put time into writing a love letter if your sole aim is getting lucky? You can do that at the club or bar without writing so much as a text message.


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## Blade (Aug 1, 2015)

dale said:


> you have a claim to that other person. he/she is yours.
> no one elses. yours. ain't nothing wrong with that.



I get the idea but I don't think terms such as 'owership' and 'property' are valid when refering to other persons. ('Ownership' suggests slavery, 'property' an object)


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## aj47 (Aug 1, 2015)

dale said:


> lol. that's funny. i find even the thought of anal sex to be disgusting. why would i wanna stick my dick in feces?
> my point is....a committed relationship is basically ownership. you have a claim to that other person. he/she is yours.
> no one elses. yours. ain't nothing wrong with that.



How long have you been married?


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## TheWonderingNovice (Aug 1, 2015)

Alright, I believe we are getting away from the OP. Treading on dangerous ground here.


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## dale (Aug 1, 2015)

astroannie said:


> How long have you been married?



long enough to know she got bought like cheap stock by another man.


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## Deleted member 56686 (Aug 1, 2015)

TheWonderingNovice said:


> Alright, I believe we are getting away from the OP. Treading on dangerous ground here.




Yes, I agree. Can we stay on subject? The thread is about how would you write a love letter, not about whether somebody is owned or not. Let's keep this thread civil, shall we?


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## Pluralized (Aug 1, 2015)

I wonder if anyone actually writes love letters these days. I also wonder if anyone's ever gotten laid through text message. 

Tinder doesn't count!


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## dale (Aug 1, 2015)

lol. yeah. i'd say the love letter has been reduced almost completely to sexting and facebook inboxing now.


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## dale (Aug 1, 2015)

i guess since i idiotically derailed the thread, i'll go ahead and explain my personal version of a love letter.
it's almost always like prose poetry and i tend to use a lot of primal wilderness imagery. i'll be "the wolf"
more often than not in spirit and i like using sensual imagery such as taste and scent intertwined with an
undertone of sex, but never anything outright pornographic. salt, caramel, sweat, and other words which would
inspire the mind to think of pleasant taste and scent. a lot of heat. i very much go into the same writing zone
in my mind when writing a love letter as i do when writing a story.


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## curtis (Aug 2, 2015)

I've been thinking about the elements of a love letter, and I think that I have an effective list. The letter should be *original*. A few sentences that are specific to your relationship go a long way towards establishing affection. The letter should be *emotional*. Focus on emotions, such as love, hope and joy. Finally, the letter should be *sincere*. You should strive to sincerely express your feelings and intentions. The letter should equal the level of commitment in the relationship. In a new relationship, the letter could resonate of desperation or insincerity.


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## escorial (Aug 2, 2015)

Firemajic....

i suspect your words are more apart of you than a smile or a laugh, despite all your encouraging words for so many people it can be ourselves that we often ignore. You write with passion and understanding and give your words freely...almost every sentence conveys an emotion that stands out to say..this is me and i would like to share this with you and all who would like to read and comment..please do. When you can put into words the days,weeks or life’s feelings you give so much of yourself that i can only imagine the depths you delve into yourself..one may not be standing by your side or pouring you a drink to discuss the days events but what i can do is appreciate you for the warm,caring person your words have shown me....this is my first and probably only love letter i will ever write and i’m so glad it’s you i wrote it to jul’s....Firemajic..x


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## Firemajic (Aug 2, 2015)

I think a love letter should be an honest , intimate expression of heartfelt emotions... so, this is mine..


Dear Escorial,
If a person is really blessed, they meet someone they connect with on every level, and the relationship defies logic and reason... and indeed, is indefinable... who hears what is said, but also hears and understands what is not said. Someone who changes who you are, who you want to be, and how you see yourself... So, I am blessed...I love and adore you, thank you ...Jul


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## PrinzeCharming (Jan 18, 2016)

I should take this idea into my latest group! A love letter should have a balance of factors. Look at it as a contract of your love to someone. The content may vary depending on the status of the relationship.  Are you just starting out? Have you been together for a while? Does your relationship feel like it's going to end? Tell her how you genuinely feel. You should always focus on facts. No comparisons either. "You're cuter than Ashley." Well, why is Ashley even in the picture? It looks suspicious when you throw other names in there. Just let it out. Treat a love letter like a free write. Who cares about the grammatical mistakes. She'll admire those flaws if what you say is worth the read. There's no right or wrong template. Your heart is on paper. How would you deliver it? 

Be yourself. Never write under pressure. Be relaxed. Get comfortable. Focus on the characteristics and attributes that set them apart. Yes, she's beautiful, but in what ways? Focus on how you feel. In French, I like to say, "Ta voix est la musique à mon coeur," or "Your voice is the music to my heart." Don't worry about impressing them with a foreign language. If you don't know it, don't bother with it. It can be a bit awkward if it's not understandable. You might even get lost in translation. Reflect on the past times you've had with this person. Do you miss those times? Tell her. Memories are worth more than you think. 

There's so much to say, but always keep it precise. Stay positive, and let it flow. In the end, she'll enjoy every minute of it.

*Edit: 
*
Although it looks better when you write well, don't focus too much on grammar. You're not writing a story. She'll understand if you make a few mistakes. Try to keep it as neat as possible. Don't ramble too much. Just stay focused on main ideas.


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## popsprocket (Jan 18, 2016)

*cough*

It's almost like you made this exact thread once before.


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## Plasticweld (Jan 18, 2016)

A good love letter is like a good conversation, the part of it that shares who and what you are, and what you are doing.  Then a legitimate concern for what the other person is doing and going over the details of what is important to them 


You might be able to write ten pages about why you love ice cream but it aint writing you back.  A true love letter creates the foundation for a sharing of common interests.


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## Riis Marshall (Jan 19, 2016)

Hello Curtis

Without trying to appear rude, maybe this is one of those situations where if you have to ask the question you won't understand the answer.

All the best with your writing.

Warmest regards
Riis


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## Reichelina (Jun 17, 2016)

curtis said:


> If you were going to write a love letter, what would you include in the content? Would you tell her why she is unique to you? What makes her special?



This is old, but, yeah, sorry.

I love love letters. Handwritten ones.
It would make me feel uber special if you state simple things you notice and love about me.

".....the way your eyebrows dance when you explain something."

But don't impress me. Just pour out emotion. I'd know if you're telling me what I want to hear versus what you want to say. I'm a witch like that. Hehehe.


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## Ultraroel (Jun 17, 2016)

Honestly, I feel most love-letters are a burden to the person you write it to. 
You send your deepest feelings for this person, without any kind of communication other than the written part.

How is this person supposed to deal with it? 
Do you expect a response? Do you want him/her to shrug?
What is your goal? Make someone feel uncomfortable? Make someone know how much you love this person? Without any strain on their side of the relationship?
What if this person does not return the same feeling. You are laying your happiness in their hands and make them feel awkward responding to it, especially if you are unsure whether it's mutual.


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## Reichelina (Jun 17, 2016)

Ultraroel said:


> Honestly, I feel most love-letters are a burden to the person you write it to.
> You send your deepest feelings for this person, without any kind of communication other than the written part.
> 
> How is this person supposed to deal with it?
> ...



Well, I've only written love letters for those I was in a relationship with. 
(But I have written thousands of letters for friends.) 

Love letters or not, I think when you confess your feelings to someone, you are risking your heart. Acceptance or Rejection.
Maybe love letters are safer (in this regard, if you are not writing to someone who loves you back) since you are not rejected face-to-face.

But here's the thing, you should be happy to know that someone loves you. Do you have to love them back? No! 
But show some respect. Have the decency to respond in a polite manner if you don't feel the same way. You can reject someone without being mean. 

I am against those people who would outright reject someone without really knowing them first, though. So, if a love letter is a confession of love, isn't it rude to just say, "Sorry, you're not my type." They have feelings too. 

But then, that's my opinion. Tee hee!


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