# Fighting the Flab.



## John 3 (Jun 6, 2017)

Fighting the Flab.


Welcome, welcome one and all
To happy times at Fatso Hall
My name is Herbert Marcus Brewer
Better known as Herr Sturmbannführer
~
Note, all our doors are super wide
So all can squeeze themselves inside
Now place your bags on the wooden stand
Where there’ll be searched for contraband
~
Off with your clothes, lay them on the floor
Don’t worry madam; I’ve seen it all before
Now what’s this secreted in your bra?
Oh, two meat pies and a chocolate bar
~
Let me introduce Professor Quack
The inventor of the Reducing Rack
Where all will spend so many hours
Loosing the flab, which it devours
~
Breakfast is milk and Carrot flakes
Lunch is juice and Carrot Bakes
Dinner, nourishing Carrot stew
Supper a Carrot, on Tuesdays two
~
On with the shorts and running shoes
Yes, Miss Brown we’ll find some for you
A jolly jaunt, just ten times round
The dead guest’s graveyard in the old compound
~
What bliss is in store, what fun it will be
To relax in the steam room at 100 degrees
All these pleasures and not a penny to pay
Just board and lodging at a thousand a day.​


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## ireneintheworld (Jun 9, 2017)

Now that made me laugh...but, seriously - write a serious one and set in the here and now. I am in that place, trying to get carefully through each day without going crazy ;-)


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## PsychoSarah (Jul 2, 2017)

This one was great to read as having an overly peppy salesman's voice.


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## jenthepen (Jul 7, 2017)

I've been so preoccupied lately that I almost missed this! I'm glad I've caught it now - we need more humour like this! Thanks for the giggle, John,   Oh, and great poetry too!


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## TuesdayEve (Oct 1, 2017)

Very funny! I think I know Professor Quack...


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